My fiance got me pregnant, same time with another girlfriend. but he was pleeding its was a mistake. pls what should i do. do i go for abotion or leave the pregnancy. pls advice me.

JBLOVE:

My fiance got me pregnant, same time with another girlfriend. but he was pleeding its was a mistake. please what should i do. do i go for abotion or leave the pregnancy. please advice me.

Na wa oh. Is he a footballer? Babe,i'ld advice u keep the pregnancy.

nana:

Na wa oh. Is he a footballer? Babe,i'ld advice u keep the pregnancy.

what if he decides that he doesn't want hers as well.
@ poster
do you have a job?
are you comfortable with being a single parent if he ever decides to bail out?
are you comfortable being second fiddle to another woman if he decides to keep both?
ask yourself all the reasonable questions and i am sure you will come to a gud conclusion.

yes, i have my job. but i love dis guy

Listen I am not going to tell you to keep the baby or get rid of the baby but I will say this, being a single mom is no fucking joke.

People think it is easy but what if this man walks away from you and that child and wants nothing to do with it. What if your family moves or you move or your family will have nothing to do with that child. What if you turn around and have no support system but yourself to rasie this child, support this child, love this child, care for this child.

I love my children with every fucking breath in my body but being a single mom having to do it alone day in and day out is no fucking joke. There are no days off for me, there are no emoional breaks for me. The only break is get is 6 weeks in the summer when the kids go to New York to be with thier grandparents. My ex-husband and I divorced 6 years ago when i was preganat with our last son and he has not seen his kids since. My parents live in New York (they moved) and live in Baltimore - 5 hours away so there is no support system- until i married my husband. Before him they got sick- I took off, doctors appointment - i took off. You cant imanage the jobs i have lost due to missing time from work to care for my children. The field trips i had to miss because i really needed to save my time incase something happened, the days i came home from work and just wanted a break but had to be a mom.

Being a single mom is like working two full time jobs and the second has no annual leave policy.

Think about this careful and do what you feel is right for you at this time in your life.

But please do not mistake this for me saying that i dont want my kids. I love my kids more than anything in heaven or on earth and would walk thru hell with gasoline drawers on for them. When I have had that hard day at work and come home to thier smiling faces nothing I tell you nothing makes you feel better. It is alot of hard work and not everyone is cut out to do it.

sistawoman:

Listen I am not going to tell you to keep the baby or get rid of the baby but I will say this, being a single mom is no fucking joke.

People think it is easy but what if this man walks away from you and that child and wants nothing to do with it. What if your family moves or you move or your family will have nothing to do with that child. What if you turn around and have no support system but yourself to rasie this child, support this child, love this child, care for this child.

I love my children with every fucking breath in my body but being a single mom having to do it alone day in and day out is no fucking joke. There are no days off for me, there are no emoional breaks for me. The only break is get is 6 weeks in the summer when the kids go to New York to be with their grandparents. My ex-husband and I divorced 6 years ago when i was preganat with our last son and he has not seen his kids since. My parents live in New York (they moved) and live in Baltimore - 5 hours away so there is no support system- until i married my husband. Before him they got sick- I took off, doctors appointment - i took off. You can't imanage the jobs i have lost due to missing time from work to care for my children. The field trips i had to miss because i really needed to save my time incase something happened, the days i came home from work and just wanted a break but had to be a mom.

Being a single mom is like working two full time jobs and the second has no annual leave policy.

Think about this careful and do what you feel is right for you at this time in your life.

But please do not mistake this for me saying that i don't want my kids. I love my kids more than anything in heaven or on earth and would walk through hell with gasoline drawers on for them. When I have had that hard day at work and come home to their smiling faces nothing I tell you nothing makes you feel better. It is alot of hard work and not everyone is cut out to do it.

Whao

How far along are you?

Please dont bother if it's over 3 months.

sista, thanks for giving some people dose of reality.

KarmaMod:

sista, thanks for giving some people dose of reality.

Sometimes I wish i could open these young peoples heads and pour in some of my knowledge, experince and visions. They think that because other people are doing it, that it must be easy. It really is hard. I could not imange what i would be like w/o the 6 weeks per year i get to recharge my battery.

I would have never ever imanged my ex-husband to be the type of brotha that would turn his back on his children but he did and I had to handle it.

jay bee:

ask yourself all the reasonable questions and i am sure you will come to a good conclusion.

Please do as he says.

sistawoman:

Listen I am not going to tell you to keep the baby or get rid of the baby but I will say this, being a single mom is no fucking joke.

People think it is easy but what if this man walks away from you and that child and wants nothing to do with it. What if your family moves or you move or your family will have nothing to do with that child. What if you turn around and have no support system but yourself to rasie this child, support this child, love this child, care for this child.

I love my children with every fucking breath in my body but being a single mom having to do it alone day in and day out is no fucking joke. There are no days off for me, there are no emoional breaks for me. The only break is get is 6 weeks in the summer when the kids go to New York to be with their grandparents. My ex-husband and I divorced 6 years ago when i was preganat with our last son and he has not seen his kids since. My parents live in New York (they moved) and live in Baltimore - 5 hours away so there is no support system- until i married my husband. Before him they got sick- I took off, doctors appointment - i took off. You can't imanage the jobs i have lost due to missing time from work to care for my children. The field trips i had to miss because i really needed to save my time incase something happened, the days i came home from work and just wanted a break but had to be a mom.

Being a single mom is like working two full time jobs and the second has no annual leave policy.

Think about this careful and do what you feel is right for you at this time in your life.

But please do not mistake this for me saying that i don't want my kids. I love my kids more than anything in heaven or on earth and would walk through hell with gasoline drawers on for them. When I have had that hard day at work and come home to their smiling faces nothing I tell you nothing makes you feel better. It is alot of hard work and not everyone is cut out to do it.

My dear sister, i pray you continue to find strength to see you through this seemingly thankless task and asides the great smiles you get after a tasking day that you live long to see them kids of yours grown to be successful individuals, making you proud and leaving an indelibe smile in your heart. Me, i am humbled.

@Poster, abeg take to heart what these two wonderful people above have said. You see, at the end of all the advice, the responsibility of the ultimate decision lies squarely on your shoulders. Very important decision you have to take. think am well o, with clear mind, for its a life decision.

As for me, i stick out my neck, with respect to any contrary views, that i am not one for abortion except in life threatening and one or two exceptional instances. _sighs And if you find it in your heart to forgive Mr Man (easy, since you still loff im) and are sure his remorse is true and lasting then do it.

Anywayz na you get decision and i pray you make the right best one.

nana:

Na wa oh. Is he a footballer? Babe,i'ld advice u keep the pregnancy.

nana:

Whao

_{why am i shaking my head?}

Just wanted to bump it back up.

@sistawoman - I always appreciate you comments.

Your description of single motherhood is spot on. I have never experienced these challenges, but I watch some of my friends go through this daily. Especially the part about never thinking that the ex would ever abandon the kids.

I have great respect for you -

@poster - PLEASE LISTEN TO SISTAWOMAN'S ADVICE - I DON'T THINK ANYONE COULD SAY IT BETTER.

sistawoman:

Listen I am not going to tell you to keep the baby or get rid of the baby but I will say this, being a single mom is no fucking joke.

People think it is easy but what if this man walks away from you and that child and wants nothing to do with it. What if your family moves or you move or your family will have nothing to do with that child. What if you turn around and have no support system but yourself to raise this child, support this child, love this child, care for this child.

I love my children with every fucking breath in my body but being a single mom having to do it alone day in and day out is no fucking joke. There are no days off for me, there are no emotional breaks for me. The only break is get is 6 weeks in the summer when the kids go to New York to be with their grandparents. My ex-husband and I divorced 6 years ago when i was pregnant with our last son and he has not seen his kids since. My parents live in New York (they moved) and live in Baltimore - 5 hours away so there is no support system- until i married my husband. Before him they got sick- I took off, doctors appointment - i took off. You can't manage the jobs i have lost due to missing time from work to care for my children. The field trips i had to miss because i really needed to save my time incase something happened, the days i came home from work and just wanted a break but had to be a mom.

Being a single mom is like working two full time jobs and the second has no annual leave policy.

Think about this careful and do what you feel is right for you at this time in your life.

But please do not mistake this for me saying that i don't want my kids. I love my kids more than anything in heaven or on earth and would walk through hell with gasoline drawers on for them. When I have had that hard day at work and come home to their smiling faces nothing I tell you nothing makes you feel better. It is alot of hard work and not everyone is cut out to do it.

God will continue to give you strenght each day and you will live to reap the fruit of your labour

@Poster the ball is in your court. My own advice is listen carefully to your instinct 99.9% it does not lie