Dear Nairalanders

Please i need your candid opinion on this very sensitive issue.

I am a lady of 27years old. I met this guy about a year ago and we started dating, he is 39years old. We really are in love, he was the one who disvirgined me, but my parents are not in support of our relationship. Their reason for objecting is that the age difference is just too much and that in a couple of years to come our interests will differ and as such the marriage will become very stresfull for me. They also told me including some of my friends that there must be more to it that meets the eyes for a man who is almost 40years not to be married.

Actually i have met most of his friends, parents, siblings, pastors etal and i have not found anything starange about him, he want us to get married anytime soon and he is really willing to talk to my parents but they are not ready to listen to him.

However because of the love i have for him, i suggested to him about 4months ago that i should get pregnant, although it is against the tenets of my religion, but he said he would want us to do it right i.e he does not want me to be pregnant until my parents accepts him and i have told him several times that my parents would not listen unless we did something drastic.

At some point i told him that i was opting out of the relationship because i don't wana waste his time, but he breaks and cry like a baby all the time i tell him this.

My dilema are; He will not agree to impregnate me, neither will my parent listen to him without me doing something drastic. Please what do i do?

i tot u posted dis shit yesterday

i

Tell your folks he was the one who defiled u or lie to them that u're pregnant.

rampagain:

i tot u posted this shit yesterday

i

heheheheheh
maybe she didnt get the reply she was looking for

rampaging, u dont have to sound rude to express urself, there are more polite way of reminding her that she posted this yesterday. Besides, she is asking for ur opinion and not an arrogant remark. cheers!

people repost thier old threads if nairalanders ignore the shit!

so i guess she vexed and reposted to capture attention by force!!

greatgut:

rampaging, u don't have to sound rude to express yourself, there are more polite way of reminding her that she posted this yesterday. Besides, she is asking for your opinion and not an arrogant remark. cheers!

i dont see anything rude here my friend so what are you raving on about?!

you getting shit twisted, it looks like you are the one sef!

greatgut:

rampaging, u don't have to sound rude to express yourself, there are more polite way of reminding her that she posted this yesterday. Besides, she is asking for your opinion and not an arrogant remark. cheers!

there is nothing like been rude here ,especially when d poster is being stupid ,and u greatgut is also stupid

she posted this thread twice yesterday,and got replies,what else does she want?

let her do watever she wants to do and let me see road

nonsense

He's almost 40 and never been married? All of a sudden he wants to get married? My sister, check o, something dey.

how far with u show ur pics

i tot we have sensible and mature pple here, she has her reason for reposting it, all we you need do is say something meaningful or ignore her, maybe she hasn't found the right answer. You don't have to insult me or anybody to air ur view.

greatgut:

i tot we have sensible and mature people here, she has her reason for reposting it, all we you need do is say something meaningful or ignore her, maybe she hasn't found the right answer. You don't have to insult me or anybody to air your view.

what answer is she looking for?so because nobody supported her ,she wants smone to support her and tell her to take in for a man who might not end up wt her tomorrow?is that d kind of answer shes looking for

if u know i was rude,u yourself would have ignored me,and answer d poster instead of calling my remarks arrogant?now who started d insult

contribute or forever hold your peace sweetie

fine and good, u dont support her and u never will. Please dear, next time try to be a little nice cos it doesn't pay to be harsh.

smtimes u need to be harsh to pass a msg across,especially wen d person is d one asking for that reaction

i hear u anyway

jemaima:


I am a lady of 27years old. I met this guy about a year ago and we started dating, he is 39years old. We really are in love, he was the one who disvirgined me

Good to know you both love each oda.

jemaima:

but my parents are not in support of our relationship. Their reason for objecting is that the age difference is just too much and that in a couple of years to come our interests will differ and as such the marriage will become very stresfull for me. They also told me including some of my friends that there must be more to it that meets the eyes for a man who is almost 40years not to be married

Sorry to say but your parents reasons for objecting doesn't hold water.Age shouldn't be a prob if you love him.Age is an issue of mind over matter.If you don't mind,it doesn't matter.I don't understand why they said your interests will differ with time,you could put me tru.Plus no marriage isn't stressful. . . It's about how you manage it.It's very possible for a person to be single for 40 yrs of his life witout "there being more to it that meets the eyes" like ur friends say.

jemaima:


However because of the love i have for him, i suggested to him about 4months ago that i should get pregnant, although it is against the tenets of my religion, but he said he would want us to do it right i.e he does not want me to be pregnant until my parents accepts him and i have told him several times that my parents would not listen unless we did something drastic.

Personally. . . I think he is a person of good moral principles.Every selfish man will jump at dis suggestion but here he is sayin"I want us to do it right".Girl. . . dats a pass mark on his path and I think he is right.

jemaima:


My dilema are; He will not agree to impregnate me, neither will my parent listen to him without me doing something drastic. Please what do i do?

You shouldn't allow him impregnate you before marriage and your parents ought to allow u marry any man of ur choice and give their blessings.You're 27 girl. . . old enuf to touch ur ears. . . old enuf to know what's right. . . . .old enuf to bear consequences of ur actions.Talk to ur parents. .as much as you try being polite also sound firm so they understand u've made up ur mind.There comes a time in one's life when one takes a decision and stands by it bearing in mind that you're ready for its effect. . Favourable or unfavourable.

I am sorry that your parents are not approving of your marriage it really is a shame when we bring someone home to meet the parents and it does not go over as well as we hoped.

What i learned, thru trial and error, is that my dad has always been on spot with anyone i dated. So i stopped and listened. He was spot on about my ex-husband and all of my ex-bf.

When i brought Okomi home to meet my father he gave his instant approval. I knew that it was ok to marry him.

You have to decide for yourself if you are willing to disregard your parents warning or not. But if thier only objection is that he is 39 and not married then to me that is not valid. I know a few Nigerian brothas that are in thier last 30's and have never been married before. It just means that they have not met a sista that is up to thier standards.

I wish you the best of luck with what you decide.

jemaima
u dont need to worry, am a year older, u can take me to ur father. i believe this will solve the problem.

okonko:

jemaima
u don't need to worry, am a year older, u can take me to your father. i believe this will solve the problem.

oga okonko u don craze!

i think u pray over it and God will show u d way

27 to 39
19 to 29
Is there anything wrong here?

dunny87:

i think u pray over it and God will show u d way

May be you are right.

Hey jemaima,sorry your parents arent approving it but i think there is a strong reason they dont want you to marry him you knw parents cud be funny at times they may have other reasons for nt wanting u to marry him be careful and dnt get pregnant just yet .listen to your parents.

rampagain:

there is nothing like been rude here ,especially when d poster is being stupid ,and u greatgut is also stupid

she posted this thread twice yesterday,and got replies,what else does she want?

let her do watever she wants to do and let me see road

nonsense

Rampagain that was very mean.