I'm a player,i can never cos i have never fallen in love,but i av a lot of girls dat do choke me 2 death wit their so called love n im tired of it,but i don't know aw 2 quit.

kolonze1:

I'm a player,i can never because i have never fallen in love,but i av a lot of girls that do choke me 2 death wit their so called love n I'm tired of it,but i don't know aw 2 quit.

If you really are a playa then you know how to make the girls quit you. Addtionally playas dont get choked. Thier women/men know the rules from jump street and follow those or get cut.

frank3.16:

I want to tell you all that men are just like babies(grown up babies therefore more complicated) you just give them what they want and u are in control of them.it takes an intelligent, strong, and sexy woman to do this and not and overpampering girlfriend.

Please explain this bit to me??

chika98:

Please explain this bit to me??

exactly how it is

men r babies chika,treat them like one,know wat they need,give it to them,the key to every channel of their heart will b under ur care

it takes one intelligent person to understand dat

jennykadri:

exactly how it is

men r babies chika,treat them like one,know what they need,give it to them,the key to every channel of their heart will b under ur care

it takes one intelligent person to understand that

I know they are. That is no news.(sometimes it is sickening sef) I just wanted him to explain it with his own mouth/hand.

Your reply is quite a long one and I can't reply everythin'
therefore permit me to quote the neccesary part.

frank3.16:

we don't degrade ourselves and give our love(even though broken) to innanimate objects or our animals.

Carin' for a pet is self vitiatin'?
I keep learning on nland everyday!!
Clean up your mind dude . . .Enlarge your definition of 'care'. . . it's not restricted to Man alone.

frank3.16:

let me tell u your problem, you are just trying to avoid getting hurt because u can't hanlde it.

Get hurt?By who/what?can't handle what?Please you're crackin' me up!!!. . . .
Sometimes it's better to have a better knowledge of people before
playin' the 'Sir I know it all' role.

frank3.16:

Sometimes women feel this way too

What way?. . . Hold on!!! Is it English that is gettin' in the way?
'cause it seems I'm missin' somethin' 'ere. . . . .
Speakin' for myself and the 45% or more women who feel d same way, I say. . . .
I want to be able to PAMPER my man BUT not DICTATE to him.
I love to call him a million times if possible just to tell him how much he means to me.
I love to beep his phone sometimes in order to inform him that I'm thinkin' of him at that moment.
I think your girlfriend(s) is/are dictatin' to you and that's why you complain.No one gets fed up with love.
It's strange if you complain of so much love. . . . . Locate the problem man,its not EXCESS LOVE but dictatorship or nosiness I think.

@ Desiree1.

What I mean by a girl "chewing guming" is a girl that is too clingy and over dotting.

@ the ladies.

Please don't get me or other guys that we are on the same page wrong. It's good to be lovd and appreciated. Every man would love to be loved and appreciated.

But when woman goes over the roof to pamper and dott over her man, this most of the time pisses the guy of (well, I think a real man). And there is the liklihood that the guy becomes spoilt and take the woman for granted. Its just like parents over pampering their kids and at the end , the kids later turn out to be problems.

also note that this also apply to guys that dott or over pamper their girls too. Girls like guys that arebrazen and "manly". It's just a normal natural human relationship rule.

Hope y'all gettit.

u reall gat the point there sillyboy, i think you have said it all, i really like it when people show this much wit.

Missyb, Life is not about thinking that you are tough or that u know it all, it has its on surprises for u, that will seem to want to shake your faith or strong belives. Obviously, u didnt understand what i mean by WOMEN FEELK THE SAME WAY TOO, cos your explanation is really off the point from what i meant. just read the last sentence of sillyboy's post, you will understand better.

Missy B:

Your reply is quite a long one and I can't reply everythin'
therefore permit me to quote the neccesary part.Carin' for a pet is self vitiatin'?
I keep learning on nland everyday!!
Clean up your mind dude . . .Enlarge your definition of 'care'. . . it's not restricted to Man alone. Get hurt?By who/what?can't handle what?Please you're crackin' me up!!!. . . .
Sometimes it's better to have a better knowledge of people before
playin' the 'Sir I know it all' role. What way?. . . Hold on!!! Is it English that is gettin' in the way?
'cause it seems I'm missin' somethin' 'ere. . . . .
Speakin' for myself and the 45% or more women who feel d same way, I say. . . .
I want to be able to PAMPER my man BUT not DICTATE to him.
I love to call him a million times if possible just to tell him how much he means to me.
I love to beep his phone sometimes in order to inform him that I'm thinkin' of him at that moment.
I think your girlfriend(s) is/are dictatin' to you and that's why you complain.No one gets fed up with love.
It's strange if you complain of so much love. . . . . Locate the problem man,its not EXCESS LOVE but dictatorship or nosiness I think.

I'm with you on this!!! The poster really needs to identify the real problem.

Missy B:

Your reply is quite a long one and I can't reply everythin'
therefore permit me to quote the neccesary part.Carin' for a pet is self vitiatin'?
I keep learning on nland everyday!!
Clean up your mind dude . . .Enlarge your definition of 'care'. . . it's not restricted to Man alone. Get hurt?By who/what?can't handle what?Please you're crackin' me up!!!. . . .
Sometimes it's better to have a better knowledge of people before
playin' the 'Sir I know it all' role. What way?. . . Hold on!!! Is it English that is gettin' in the way?
'cause it seems I'm missin' somethin' 'ere. . . . .
Speakin' for myself and the 45% or more women who feel d same way, I say. . . .
I want to be able to PAMPER my man BUT not DICTATE to him.
I love to call him a million times if possible just to tell him how much he means to me.
I love to beep his phone sometimes in order to inform him that I'm thinkin' of him at that moment.
I think your girlfriend(s) is/are dictatin' to you and that's why you complain.No one gets fed up with love.
It's strange if you complain of so much love. . . . . Locate the problem man,its not EXCESS LOVE but dictatorship or nosiness I think.

I'm with you on this!!! The poster really needs to identify the real problem.

frank3.16:

u didnt understand what i mean by WOMEN FEELK THE SAME WAY TOO, because your explanation is really off the point from what i meant.

That's why I said palpably English is gettin' in the way.
Make me understand berra for the only reason I'm still postin' on this thread
is 'cause you're the first man that I've seen complaining of  EXCESS LOVE

sillyboy:

also note that this also apply to guys that dott or over pamper their girls too. Girls like guys that arebrazen and "manly". It's just a normal natural human relationship rule.

Hope y'all gettit.

Yea!! I hate a 'Mr push over' all in the name of being nice
but I cannot complain of gettin' choked as a result of excess love.
If I'm right,the posta isn't complainin 'bout a dummy girlfriend.His censure is on excees love
which is strange to me.We tend to get tired when our men are as weak as ripe plantain.
C'mon. . . which man hates to receive a call frm his wife in the office jst to hear'You're the best baby'
or 'please come home early,I can't wait to see you'?Like Tgirl and I said. . . Identify the problem.
It's either she's nosy or a dummy or y'all are insatiable.Excess love?please,if you tell me that again. . .
I'm afraid I'mma faint.

Missy b,

I guess what we are seeing here is lack of sincerity. The poster claims he loves the girl, hmm, I really find that hard to swallow now,

I'm sure he doesn't really, trully, and sincerely love the girl.

my conclusion will be that he doesn't know what he wants,

Tgirl4real:

Missy b,

I guess what we are seeing here is lack of sincerity. The poster claims he loves the girl,  hmm,  I really find that hard to swallow now,

I'm sure he doesn't really,  trully,  and sincerely love the girl

my conclusion will be that he doesn't know what he wants,

Gbam!!!
End of tori!!

I know ideally u should always want to be with the one u love but when they get all clingy and all demanding of your time, energy and resources, then it becomes a burden - for me sha. I think the key here is to find the right balance to it all, a girl should be able to tell when its begining to get on the nerve, she should know when to just stop or pause a bit.
I could get frightened away when a girl starts pushing the limits quite often, many guys dont like that.

Life is never easy. I'm guessing they start seeing it as choking when they've had enough of other things.

spikedcylinder:

Life is never easy. I'm guessing they start seeing it as choking when they've had enough of other things.

You should revisit that movie - How to Lose a guy in 10 days

He had not had enough of anything but he was already tired of all the calls and all the clingy behaviour. . . It gets worse when, as a guy, your friends notice

I get what they are saying.  God knows I have been there.  It seems to happen to me with the guys that never believe they can be with someone so pretty, r just getting out of a relationship or are "love junkies" or have self-esteem issues or insecurities.

It can choke you to death.  When you see their name pop up on the phone you think dam it let me miss you and call you.  Please stop calling me so much.  If you notice that you do all the calling.  Stop It!!!!! there is a problem.  let him/her call you.  If I you get upset because i went to take a shit and did not tell you STOP IT!!!! you are smothering me to death.

I was picking out my clothes, getting to work and handling my daily items on my own before you, let me keep to do it unless i ask for you help.  If you find yourself inviting yourself over STOP IT!!!!  If i want you to come over i will ask you.

Over smothering has ended enough relationships and really taught me to back off of guys and be careful not to do it to them.  I can love but not smother you.

Why would i want my phone to keep beeping and ringing while i am at work.  How exactly does that reflect positively on me at the office?  How is waking me up in the middle of the night good for me if I have to go to work the next day?

I feel yall for real.  I like to know you are thinking of me but shit too much of any thing is gluttony and that is sinful.


*modified* dont mind me this morning spelling and grammer and missing words I have not had my coffee yet

sistawoman:

I feel yall for real. I like to know you are thinking of me but shit too much of any thing is gluttony and that is sinful.

God bless the day you were born
You are a true daughter of your father, your mother was only the witness

whitelexi:

You should revisit that movie - How to Lose a guy in 10 days

He had not had enough of anything but he was already tired of all the calls and all the clingy behaviour. . .  It gets worse when, as a guy, your friends notice

I remember the movie. I also remember that when she stopped giving him any attention, he was th one crawling back to her.

Don't get me wrong, too much of anything is bad and I understand that men (and women!) need a partner than can stand on their own, be their own person and defend themselves when the need arises but sometimes, women feel the need to pamper when they are in love.


whats wit ur siggy?

spikedcylinder:

I remember the movie. I also remember that when she stopped giving him any attention, he was th one crawling back to her.

Don't get me wrong, too much of anything is bad and I understand that men (and women!) need a partner than can stand on their own, be their own person and defend themselves when the need arises but sometimes, women feel the need to pamper when they are in love.


whats wit ur siggy?

Accepted

_{The siggy is from a song from that eedris jaga-jaga album}

thank you very much sisterwoman, I think u gat my point.

@Missyb and Tgirl, i think you girls just choose not to understand me. I believe the best woman for any man is the woman who can constanly make her man crave for her. I belive you girls should know this.
I really do love this girl, i know i do, yet as a man I want her to continue making me crave for her without letting me tell her to.
I know she loves me for sure, but thats not the reason why she should call me 20times a day and still acuse me of not calling her 20 times a day because she is the one doing more calling.

Today she called me at work while I was with my boss, putting me in the tight position of choosing between picking her call and neglecting the impressiong I might leave on my boss about me for picking the call, knowing that if i dont pick her call she will accuse me of not picking her call, yet if i tell her to take it easy on how she calls me she gets unhappy that now that she loves me so much i dont love her again, and i care so much for her that i dont want her to feel this way.

cant you see that she is making feel relaxed in this relationship? this is the worst thing that can happen in a relationship - COMFORT ZONE . I want her to feel i dont love her so much like i really do, and i want to feel she doesnt love me like she really does also, that way, we both will continue working hard to win each others love as we want (not knowing that its really there)
Hey girls out there this is just it, the continuous struggle, isnt it what this life is all about?

@ Poster,

Seems you've gat time for unnecessary rubbish too. . . . u r gettin to sound "wussy" to me

@topic

Na wa oooooooo

Human beings  are sooo insatiable.

If one is not crying out for love , one would be crying out for no love at all  Now the new thing in vogue is how to avoid 'chewing gum' girls  Exactly what does that mean?

At first i thought the topic was about girls who are obssesive and over protective that was choking.

Frank and Sillyboy seem to want their relationship to remain in the 'chase/challenge' period rather than let it go through the normal stages. . . . . . .

No one can tell me that when they get someone who would love them unconditionally, daily and immensely; they would be whining about being choked.

The only time it starts to choke is when you are not on the same page as the person. Simple!

@ NJ HJ.

The only time it starts to choke is when you are not on the same page as the person. Simple!

Excatly my point. The two have to be on the "same page". . else, one will be "chewing guming" the other. It is left for each other to discern if his or her partner are on the same page.

One person and she is a crowd?

One person and she is a crowd?

Excuse me

Hi, Naja Haje, remeber me? the guy who thought your user name sounds like a masqurades. we became friends and i almost fall inlove before I was banned for being too agressive. well am back. guess I am now a better person.

back to the topic
the problem with this world is over indulgence in anything we do, as in excess deprivation or over indulgence.

the question i want to ask is, why is it that women like doing any they do in excesss
if they want to become theives they usually go to the extreme
if they are intelligent they are too much
if they want to steal money from the government, there own wil be different,
if they are after drug marchents, they step on every bodies toe
if they indulge in alcohol, no one can control them
if they want to be good, they are too good,
if they want to be bad, wow!
if they are fed up in a relationship, there is no going back
if they want to do shakara, they over do it
if the LOVE you, they will want to even kill u with love

no want to God allows very few of them to be at the top of affairs in life situations

NaJa HaJe:

@topic


The only time it starts to choke is when you are not on the same page as the person. Simple!

Good point. It was what I was trying to say but you put it out better than me.

aiight broda i feel u sha but i must confess say women ehn once dem love u na die b dat coz dem go feel say if them leave us one bit we go change like cameleon but it can be choking, my babe dey call me like 20times aday even no dey miss every weekend for my krip self but wetin we go do?

ok i think you ladies need to ease up on the guys. it's the way men are built - they're hunters, and even though women are beginning to develop some of those traits, we need to be honest. if you want to keep your man, you have to keep letting him do the hunting. and keep giving him new things to chase about you. even when he admits he loves you, he'll still get the urge to seek out something new and exciting. if he can't find that in you, he'll look elsewhere. also, if he begins to feel like he's been captured and caged (wild animals don't do well in cages) he'll look for the nearest exit.

the analogy about them being like babies is true.
when they say they want their women brainy, sexy and hard, it's true ( @ sillyboy)
when he says he loves her but can't stand being smothered by her love all in one sentence, they (unfortunately) mean it.

(un)luckily for my bfs, i usually am the one asking for space. i also can't stand being smothered. just give him enough space to chase. make him whine occasionally that u don't care about him. it's what they all instinctively want.

@poster
i cannot take 20 calls a day from ANYBODY. she needs to ease up a bit. the fact that you love her is not her gatepass to heaven. she should think about how she'll pick up the pieces of her heart when one day you decide (as it all too often happens irrespective of how perfect she was) that it's no longer working.

pssssssst!! that's what makes us 'hard'

Well said.

I just think guys that think thier women or girlfriends show too much care, must check themselves. Cos if they don't you think they are seeing some

other guy or something. These things can be checked if the guy is trusting and all. If you have a guy that has got tendencies to cheat, men you have to

keep tabs else you are likely to loose him to another woman or you take a hike.

chikito1
you do well, I am not surprised that your man is the one doing the chewing gumming, I think you have got what it takes.
To other girls out there, i am not really compaining, I just wanted to find out if i am the only guy who feel this way, but as it stands the feeling is like that in most men. Right now i know there is nothing wrong with me.
as for my girl, i will try and play some stunts with her, something that will make her change for good., hope it works. thanks guys