When the word "monogamy" comes to mind, the question that follows are - Is anyone monogamous any more? Truly monogamous?

We may not be having serial affairs in the John Terry/Tiger Woods mode. We may not find ourselves transgressing as dramatically as Iris Robinson. Or as publicly and ineptly as Ashley Cole. But we are probably less monogamous than we used to be, aren't we? We're perhaps having extended flirtations, serious and not-so-serious dalliances like having a special, ostensibly platonic lunch dates with people we see more regularly than we'd like our partners to know. We are, at the very least, testing the borders of fidelity via the medium of text message, or Facebook connections, or Twitter exchanges. And some of us are having fully fledged, old-fashioned, impassioned affairs.

What qualifies as flirtation and what crosses the line? How often does extended flirtation becomes an affair?

There are few reliable statistics relating to rates of infidelity. It is often not the kind of thing people would boldly tell the truth about, or have ever plainly told the truth about. Psychologists think men traditionally overstate their infidelities, while women understate. The most regularly invoked figures suggest that roughly 30-40% of those in a marriage or long-term relationship will be somewhat unfaithful at some point.

Logic would suggest we're having more affairs than ever. We're presented with more opportunities to cheat. We work more and travel more, and consequently are more absent from our homes. The evolving landscape of technology means we are connected, sometimes intensely and continuously with many more people than before. Technology also means that the very definitions of infidelity have broadened. Emotional infidelities are increasingly an issue. Entire affairs are played out online. Intense relationships which may or may not blur the line on friendship, who knows? It flourish via the intimacy of the text message exchange.

We're still incredibly reverent about and attached to the ideal of monogamy yet we engage in one form of illicit affair or the other. En masse we are critical of other people and their infidelities, but not ours. We're fantastically sanctimonious regarding celebrity's transgressions. We were glad that John Terry was stripped of his captaincy, delighted that Tiger Woods lost his endorsement deals as a consequence of his alleged infidelities, overjoyed that Cheryl gave Ashley the boot. We condemn the unfaithful publicly and gossip about of ours privately.


Why are we living this dichotomy? Why do we support the idea of monogamy so heartily while not managing to be monogamous? Why do we persist in having affairs, persist in believing in monogamy, when we're not comfortable with or especially capable of either?

Culled from http://www.nigeriapia.com/questioning-21st-centurys-faithfulness

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Sorry, I am not to be blamed for not understanding the post

Danhumprey: