Let us assume that there is a guy somewhere who is successful and has money and material things. He is still relatively young but his issue is that he always attracts the wrong type of girls. Or even when he attracts seemingly OK girls, after they get comfortable/familiar with him and material things, they begin to change.

The guy is not interested in runs girls, club lifestyle or rough girls. He doesn't drink, smoke or go to clubs. He just wants someone that can humbly enjoy the essence of life with him with the ultimate focus still being on God. He is not looking for a super model, just an ordinary girl to love and make a home with. Beauty can be enhanced with money for those that don't know, but the truth is he doesn't put much emphasis on physical appearance. He knows that money can be good and very enjoyable if it is shared, but shared with the right person for the right reasons.

His friends have suggested to him that to solve the issue, he should not allow girls to know about his financial status. Whilst that suggestion makes sense on a level, he drives a luxury car and lives in a nice/expensive area. Those are things that are impossible to hide because he wouldn't want to start taking other modes of transport or pretending to live in another area just to attract a woman. That would be inconvenient and dishonest anyway.

Is it just a matter of continuing to wait? Why are the right girls not coming? Is it that good and caring young women will not like to be a man like that because of fears he will not be loyal to them? Because they think he can replace her with a runs girl at any time? Perhaps the insecurity and thoughts of not being good enough to be with someone who has money? What could that guy do to earn the trust of a good woman at first sight without intimidating her?

The rich guy also has to be humble, caring and God fearing

Let him look up to God......................... period

This issue has been bothering me too.

They all just come, take what they want and go.

I now enter public transport most of the time.

Be ursef.....dont be proud and intimidating (u culd b without ur knowing, u know)
u sound religious, so pray bout it, God wil provide sumone meet for u. gudluk!

The rich guy should leave his number here, I'll contact him for lessons. Or he can pm me. :PThe rich guy should leave his number here, I'll contact him for lessons. Or he can pm me.

He should advertise his riches .

No 1. Pray
No 2. Shine you eyes
No 3. Love with your heart and your brain
No 4. Kip building up yourself (we can improve on what is already good and make it better)
No 5. Seek good counsel

buildingacastle: ?

why do I have this feeling you are talking about yourself?

well, the truth is, it won't be easy to find a girl who loves u for you, not what you have, good girls are out there but very difficult to find. Once a girl knows you have some cool material stuffs, like a cool ride, very decent apartment etc,she will be naturally drawn to you, sometimes the feeling is even like love to her but truth is, its not love cos when she gets use to those things, her real character surfaces. I would have said look into the church, but that one is no longer a guarantee, the world has gone into the church. My advise is, try dating by recommendation, this has worked for some peeps I know. Some one tells u about this someone who's very decent and responsible... Since u are not crazy about appearance, this should work for you.

krall: This issue has been bothering me too.

They all just come, take what they want and go.

I now enter public transport most of the time.

Go to the market and do love survey. You will be surprise at the flock of respectable ladies buying and selling. Ask for a favour and judge from her/their reactions. Some girls will care for you than your mum could.
The first step is to go to the market.

firstEVA: why do I have this feeling you are talking about yourself?

well, the truth is, it won't be easy to find a girl who loves u for you, not what you have, good girls are out there but very difficult to find. Once a girl knows you have some cool material stuffs, like a cool ride, very decent apartment etc,she will be naturally drawn to you, sometimes the feeling is even like love to her but truth is, its not love cos when she gets use to those things, her real character surfaces. I would have said look into the church, but that one is no longer a guarantee, the world has gone into the church. My advise is, try dating by recommendation, this has worked for some peeps I know. Some one tells u about this someone who's very decent and responsible... Since u are not crazy about appearance, this should work for you.

Please he wouldn't want to hear about the 'looking into church' matter. It is no guarantee at all. In fact if you told him that now, he would just laugh at that suggestion. He was in a relationship with a Pastor's daughter for a whole year planning marriage until it emerged that she was a deep runs girl (up to 5 senior citizens per day on some days at 20k each) She was in Nigeria, he lives abroad - that's how she was able to avoid early detection. But it is true and verifiable that she is a head pastor's daughter and goes to church up to 3 times per week so although I like your advice, when I tell him I will leave out the 'looking into church' part. Pastors daughter, usher, worker in training etc doesn't guarantee anything anymore.

bluedaze: The rich guy should leave his number here, I'll contact him for lessons. Or he can pm me. :PThe rich guy should leave his number here, I'll contact him for lessons. Or he can pm me.

Hehehehe...

Confess already babe we will support u

Afterall wooing is now allowed

Ploy: Go to the market and do love survey. You will be surprise at the flock of respectable ladies buying and selling. Ask for a favour and judge from her/their reactions. Some girls will care for you than your mum could.
The first step is to go to the market.

Is that how you found your wife/plan to find your wife? Because that one doesn't make sense o my brother. I could not make that suggestion to him whilst still keeping a straight face! But well done for trying sha.

buildingacastle: Is it that good and caring young women will not like to be a man like that because of fears he will not be loyal to them? Because they think he can replace her with a runs girl at any time? Perhaps the insecurity and thoughts of not being good enough to be with someone who has money? What could that guy do to earn the trust of a good woman at first sight without intimidating her?

Is this what you believe?

Are you creating self fulfilling prophecies of good girls being intimidated by you? You will be surprised how powerful your mind is if you believe only runs girls can handle wealthy men those are the kind of women you will attract you will keep wondering why,thinking its the women but its you. Change how you see young,caring women they are not scared of you.

You may also be attracted to women who seem to be more fun could be you feel and believe good gals are boring so you subconsciously attract the pretenders,runs gals or exceptionally boring good gals. There was a show i used to watch can't remember the name but it was all about change your thinking you change your life.

And i hope you are not waiting for the good girls to come to you, you should be out there doing, wooing them not waiting. If you wait you kind of limit yourself to only women who want you if you go out and get them, whoever you want, you create more options for yourself.

andromida:

Is this what you believe?

Are you creating self fulfilling prophecies of good girls being intimidated by you? You will be surprised how powerful your mind is if you believe only runs girls can handle wealthy men those are the kind of women you will attract you will keep wondering why,thinking its the women but its you. Change how you see young,caring women they are not scared of you.

It's a shame that you did not read the very first sentence of my post. And in the unlikely event that you actually read it, it's an even bigger shame that you failed to understand it...
Go back and re-read the very first sentence of my post. Read as many times as is required for you to understand what it means. If you need to get someone to translate it into your local dialect for better understanding, feel free.
Other than that advice, I have no response for you

Op u sound serious but don't know hw real u are

And u jus created dis account meaning u r shielding urself frm previous acts

Anyways if u r for real pm

irishCream: Op u sound serious but don't know hw real u are

And u jus created dis account meaning u r shielding urself frm previous acts

Anyways if u r for real pm

Wow. You have really conducted your research on me. I have just created this account, because I have never been a member of Nairaland in the past. A friend of mine told me about it just recently. I like the idea of it because I can say things on my mind whilst still maintaining a certain degree of anonymity. If anonymity is a concern it simply means I want people's opinion about matters I don't really want to share with those I see on a day-to-day basis.

Nevertheless, I wouldn't spend time and effort typing paragraphs of what you are suggesting is essentially a fake story. Abi is someone paying me to tell stories online ni? I don't think so.

Take a vacation to somewhere u re not known and disguise urself as a poor or rather average guy.


I think thats the only way u can find true love in nigeria.

buildingacastle:
Wow. You have really conducted your research on me. I have just created this account, because I have never been a member of Nairaland in the past. A friend of mine told me about it just recently. I like the idea of it because I can say things on my mind whilst still maintaining a certain degree of anonymity. If anonymity is a concern it simply means I want people's opinion about matters I don't really want to share with those I see on a day-to-day basis.

Nevertheless, I wouldn't spend time and effort typing paragraphs of what you are suggesting is essentially a fake story. Abi is someone paying me to tell stories online ni? I don't think so.

Nice!!!

I'm giving u the benefit of doubt then...

Waiting for u to do the needful if it interest u...

In the streets.

buildingacastle:

It's a shame that you did not read the very first sentence of my post. And in the unlikely event that you actually read it, it's an even bigger shame that you failed to understand it...
Go back and re-read the very first sentence of my post. Read as many times as is required for you to understand what it means. If you need to get someone to translate it into your local dialect for better understanding, feel free.
Other than that advice, I have no response for you

I don't see the shame if i don't understand the first sentence of your post but you did say let us assume and I assumed it was you.

The talk down in bolded is very dramatic. What pains you?

Oh but you already responded apart from the advice.

op so now its a sin/crime to b like Dangote?

Well wealth is like pregnancy u cant hide

so just enjoy it

n stop watching too much nollywood movies, things r diff in real life

I have a friend who is also having same issues. Very wealthy and God fearing, but has been single for up to two years now because the girls he keeps meeting are just not what he's looking for. Meanwhile all he wants is a God fearing and faithful lady to settle with.

lol.you remind me of someone.Sometimes one just enjoy the money and attention of a well to do guy.At some point, when you begin to cherish than love him,you take a walk just to give him that space to find the real woman.Watch and pray.

zonax: I have a friend who is also having same issues. Very wealthy and God fearing, but has been single for up to two years now because the girls he keeps meeting are just not what he's looking for. Meanwhile all he wants is a God fearing and faithful lady to settle with.

because there are not a lot of them around, most of them are already taken by the time they hit 20 even before they finish school and because they are faithful by nature, they stay taken...

Buildingacastle i wouldn't mind chopping some naira oh...

On a more serious note, you have a point about hiding your identity until you know who's for real. Its just a pity that you've exposed yourself here. I will suggest you take some months out, probably 6months. Change your address to some place average. Don't drive your car, take public tranportation during that period. You will get to know people in your new environment. It will be worth it. Or just visit another state of your choice during a festive period like and meet people. You just have to meet people.

I can bet the amount of PMs he must have received
Chai
Chai
Chai


We women no dey read/hear money

by minding his own bizness

See all these chics acting nice and sweet. Toasting the guy with style.

Lol! NL girls have suddenly become Humble,Respectful&God fearing. That's the power of money.