samuelson06:


I don't think there is anything wrong with being a real woman and being able to pray hard? Stop sounding hypocritical.

there is nothing wrong you are married to her.
but this one wey she be prayer warrior and still de wipe

pray gini

2buff:
LOL we computer guys tend to need A LOT more space than most guys.

OP she is just a girl that likes attention.
There are ways to resolve it, but you shouldn't keep abusing yourself just to make her happy. It won't be sustainable past a couple months.

Basically, as per her love language, the things she wants from you are things that, to her, signify that she is being shown love.
You just need to communicate to her that you not wanting those things all the time does not mean you don't love her.

For example, you need to let her know that you find some things disrespectful, like excessive questions about stuff. That you need space and time on your own to do stuff and finish tasks. The summary is "She just doesn't know". Most women have no hobby or thing they do that requires "their space" unlike guys, so most of them find it hard to understand why someone will want to just be "all alone" like that. And if the person doesn't want them to come in, it means the person doesn't like them, and if in a relationship, means the person doesnt love them.

You just need to teach her. Like you said, she is humble.
Try all that with a woman that ISN'T humble or teachable. With THAT kind, you would best quit wasting your time, cut your losses and go find someone else.
But give clear communication a try with this one.

You understand me so much. You just nail it. Thanks so much.

But you sef no dey try sha. Why won't you hug her when you open the door for her?

I can't just do all those "love u wantintin" thingy. I like it straight and simple. But she'll feel am not really in love. I don't even talk to other girls o. I just need time. I love system so much too. With my two laptops, she wouldn't even care to pick one and get clued to it rather she'll choose to stay by the side, talk and laugh with herself. If I don't answer, wahala. At times, I'll just ask myself what is happening to me. She wouldn't let me work and when I stop to attend to her, she'll ask me why are u not working again! Just imagine.

samuelson06:
1. She disturbs and talks a lot.
2. She wouldn't allow me concentrate with my computer. I do MS-SQL and most times, domain name search.
3. She always complains about missing me and visiting NL forum so much.
4. When spending the night in my place, she'll want me to be holding her throughout the night and always asking about my dreams in the morning when she didn't even allow me to sleep.
5. She calls so much and always asking "where are you?"
6. [BLOCKED]
7. She always wants to work where I work.
8. Always want me to hug her when I open the door to welcome her.
9. Always ask who I chat with at any time on Whatsapp. Wish there was a way I could be online and she sees me offline on her end.
10. She hates football and most times, we'll quarel fighting to choose between Telemundo and SS3 and she wouldn't let me go to viewing center.

But I love her on the other hand...
1. She'll wake me up early to go to work anytime she's around and prepares food [arranged] in a tray for me.
2. She's a friend with the kitchen.
3. She does her 'home work' very well like a Calabar woman.
4. She is slim and looks small but matured (fig 8 ).
5. She is very humble.
6. She hates joints.
7. She is hardworking.
8. She encourages a lot.
9. She prays a lot.

I need your advice. Am just feeling confused but I need my own time and space. I need to be free.

This sounds like my woman

samuelson06:


You understand me so much. You just nail it. Thanks so much.



I can't just do all those "love u wantintin" thingy. I like it straight and simple. But she'll feel am not really in love. I don't even talk to other girls o. I just need time. I love system so much too. With my two laptops, she wouldn't even care to pick one and get clued to it rather she'll choose to stay by the side, talk and laugh with herself. If I don't answer, wahala. At times, I'll just ask myself what is happening to me. She wouldn't let me work and when I stop to attend to her, she'll ask me why are u not working again! Just imagine.

I know, but at some point in time, you might need to tone down the attention your computer gets, even if just a little. They really need that stuff. Especially when a family gets into the picture. It's why our kind prefer staying single sometimes until we "release a few things", "launch a few startups" etc because women will generally start seeing your passion as a competition.

We operate best with women who "have their own thing going" or who have been adequately trained enough to understand our nature.
The second type is usually best, but that just means, we have to be the one to train them..with love and understanding of her needs as well. Because the club-going, boozing, party-going guy whose lifestyle is a constant mating call (designer life, bling, social wahala, etc) is not going to train them for us according to our own spec, so best get busy bro

ireneony:
there is nothing wrong you are married to her.
but this one wey she be prayer warrior and still de wipe

pray gini

I love people that prays hard. I don't joke with prayers rather. It's what has kept me. I don't allow the wrong things that I may do to overshadow the good things am suppose to do. Life is all about creating a balance. Am not a club type and at the same time, I wouldn't say I don't f**k. And that shouldn't make me to turn away from my God or serves Him at low key. BTW, I have enjoyed so much divine health and I know it's my prayers that have been doing that for me. So if you think because you do some wrong things, your Christian life should suffer, well that's you. That's how I think.

2buff:


I know, but at some point in time, you might need to tone down the attention your computer gets, even if just a little. They really need that stuff. Especially when a family gets into the picture. It's why our kind prefer staying single sometimes until we "release a few things", "launch a few startups" etc because women will generally start seeing your passion as a competition.

We operate best with women who "have their own thing going" or who have been adequately trained enough to understand our nature.
The second type is usually best, but that just means, we have to be the one to train them..with love and understanding of her needs as well. Because the club-going, boozing, party-going guy whose lifestyle is a constant mating call (designer life, bling, social wahala, etc) is not going to train them for us according to our own spec, so best get busy bro

Bro u rock! MS-SQL is about Database and has so much to do with coding. It could be so frustrating trying to run a code and the thing shows error and you look around someone is just there asking you what you feel she should cook at weekend.

samuelson06:


Bro u rock! MS-SQL is about Database and has so much to do with coding. It's could be so frustrating trying to run a code and the thing shows error and you look around someone is just there asking you what you feel we should cook at weekend.

LOL all na balance my broda.
When you get children, someone has to think about what they will eat while you are tracking runtime errors naw .
A house of 2 geeks likely won't work out.

She seems into you, and teachable. That's very rare in this our generation.
You might regret it later if you don't try to help her understand you better with love.

The only difference is understanding. She of you, and you of her. Communication and love is the cure for that.

samuelson06:


I love people that prays hard. I don't joke with prayers rather. It's what has kept me. I don't allow the wrong things that I may do to overshadow the good thing am suppose to do. Life is all about creating a balance. Am not a club type and at the same time, I wouldn't say I don't f**k. And that shouldn't make me to turn away from my God or serves Him at low key. BTW, I have enjoyed so much divine health and I know it's my prayers that have been doing that for me. So if you think because you do some wrong things, your Christian life should suffer, well that's you. That's how I think.

after praying hard she will open her legs for u, how will God answer such prayer

ireneony:
you mean she is a prayer warrior and f***k like mad, are u sure is not praying to sango. Christianity is turning into something else

gbam
u just made a valid statement there

the best reply I cannot give is hook me up with her.....


I'll appreciate her great effort

I think you don't really love this girl. You are not into her and you seem not ready to bear the emotional attachment that comes with relationship. Well like a poster said I will advice her to quit since you are tired of her. Most times women just want to feel loved,its not just in what you tell her,its about your actions. I as a person won't be in a relationship with someone who isn't excited about me.

ireneony:
after praying hard she will open her legs for u, how will God answer such prayer

Wallow in your own wrongdoings nah and forget about God. Don't even go to church again. To open leg is your highest sin right? Anyway, you can ask God how He answers prayers from such people but I know He does answer our prayers.

remsonik:
I think you don't really love this girl. You are not into her and you seem not ready to bear the emotional attachment that comes with relationship. Well like a poster said I will advice her to quit since you are tired of her. Most times women just want to feel loved,its not just in what you tell her,its about your actions. I as a person won't be in a relationship with someone who isn't excited about me.

This is exactly what am talking about. Always wanting our lives to revolve around them. I shouldn't concentrate again because of love right? Why? You guys always like that we carry this relationship thing on our head before you believe we also love. And so sadly, real tech guys don't 'love'. You think coding is moi-moi.

samuelson06:


Wallow in your own wrongdoings nah and forget about God. Don't even go to church again. To open leg is your highest sin right? Anyway, you can ask God how He answers prayers from such people but I know He does answer our prayers.

please don't take personal. OK sorry

samuelson06:


This is exactly what am talking about. Always wanting our lives to revolve around them. I shouldn't concentrate again because of love right? Why? You guys always like that we carry this relationship thing on our head before you believe we also love. And so sadly, real tech guys don't 'love'. You think coding is moi-moi.

Real techie guys don't love I know. I am a techie myself and I code. Its all about finding a balance,maybe you really need to look at what you both want from the relationship. Two can't walk together except they agree. The picture she's looking at might not be what you are looking at. That's why I encourage everyone to ask their partner what do u want from this relationship? It makes things smoother

ireneony:
please don't take personal. OK sorry

We call it even then

remsonik:

Real techie guys don't love I know. I am a techie myself and I code. Its all about finding a balance,maybe you really need to look at what you both want from the relationship. Two can't walk together except they agree. The picture she's looking at might not be what you are looking at. That's why I encourage everyone to ask their partner what do u want from this relationship? It makes things smoother

I don't have any problem with her o. Just that she does some things at extreme. At times I'll just ask myself, would this girl always be like this or would she change? Other times, I feel like going for a bedroom flat so that possibly I can lock myself somewhere, do my work and watch what I like there too but I know she'll feel I don't love her [maybe] again. I want to be free. I want to be myself and let her be herself. I don't have any problem with her watching Telemundo or AM but my problem is when she wouldn't let me watch live matches and wouldn't like I go to a viewing center to watch. Asking me what is in football sef. At times I'll get mad then I'll just laugh and ask her "why are you doing this to me?" I have tried not to hurt her in any way because of these but...I don't know. You guys should just understand me. I've stayed for long without a girl. I prayed God for a real woman but it seems everything is coming overdose.

samuelson06:


You want her to quit? Is this the best you can give? Abeg, park one side.

She is too good for you and you know it

samuelson06:


I don't have any problem with her o. Just that she does some things at extreme. At times I'll just ask myself, would this girl always be like this or would she change? Other times, I feel like going for a bedroom flat so that possibly I can lock myself somewhere, do my work and watch what I like there too but I know she'll feel I don't love her [maybe] again. I want to be free. I want to be myself and let her be herself. I don't have any problem with her watching Telemundo or AM but my problem is when she wouldn't let me watch live matches and wouldn't like I go to a viewing center to watch. Asking me what is in football sef. At times I'll get mad then I'll just laugh and ask her "why are you doing this to me?" I have tried not to hurt her in any way because of these but...I don't know. You guys should just understand me. I've stayed for long without a girl. I prayed God for a real woman but it seems everything is coming overdose.

@ op i doubt if u rili undastand wot u want

I wonder what exactly u want in a woman

I have one thing to say; U ALLOWED HER TOO MUCH SPACE TO CONTROL THE RELATIONSHIP.

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