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Is She Worth Marrying??? - Romance - Nairaland

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Met Her Today And She Is Willing To Visit Me Tomorrow. Is She Worth It? / Advise Needed....... Is She Worth It? / Is A Man Worth Marrying If He Is Too Shy Even To Propose? (2) (3) (4)

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Is She Worth Marrying??? by bjayx: 8:57am On Nov 20, 2014
Let me say dis is happening to me cos i see no reason why nairalanders's should advice an imaginary person.
I met a girl wen i was in my pre degree programme, like a month after dating i wanted to make love to her but she refused(claimed she was a virgin). She told me she will allow me disvirgin her right there if i will promise to marry her. She looked serious but i was too young to make such a commitment i tot so i stood up and told her we should just be friends... Annoyingly, she left, no phones then so we didnt see till 200l, we started friendship again and led to a relationship. Dis time, i asked if she was still a virgin and she said yes. She told me she dated a guy but not even a kiss was involved. I tot i was becomin a guy whom a serious relationship is not bad for so we started but d tot of sexing her just didnt come. Truth is i prefered going to sex my side chicks.
During IT year, cos of guys talks like never trust a girl no matter wat, i decided to now sex her, i found out she wasn't wat i expected thou tight if u understand wat i mean, i asked her about it but she said she was a virgin, after som persuasion, with tears she said she was molested as a child by an area uncle then. I forgave her but it put a whole in my heart.
Somtin happened , somtimes she chats on bb wit dat her ex boyf whose now married but recently during dia chat, d guy asked wen she was gettin married n she told him family introduction is soon so d guy accused her of not trying to invite him for her wedding and she said i must invite u now as per first love. Wen i saw it, i was not myself kinda, i put it up to her and she started cryin again withot saying anything concrete but dis time, it widened dat hole in my heart. I try to forget it but i wake up somtimes 3-4 a.m most days wit it as my first tot. The truth is it worries me. I av not spoken to her about it since 3weeks ago nor seen her.
Pls i dont want it on frontpage cos d persons involved could see it, just sensible advice from adults. Tanx!

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Dahjhi: 8:58am On Nov 20, 2014
From the virgin issue, whether she's a virgin or not now may not make a difference, but the ex issue.. If its as much giving you a sleepless night now then its worth thinking about. I will want to say if you eventually get married and in close range with the "first love", possibility of insecurity is sure especially when they don't " do it" when they actually dated.... BE WISE!! lipsrsealed

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by vizkiz: 9:02am On Nov 20, 2014
The MB for this reply is too high for me to download grin

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by naijaboiy: 9:08am On Nov 20, 2014
i want to understand something please.

You mean you can't marry her because she wants to invite her first love to the wedding?
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by laplace12(m): 9:38am On Nov 20, 2014
naijaboiy:
i want to understand something please.

You mean you can't marry her because she wants to invite her first love to the wedding?

Calling the guy 'first love' heightened his suspicion. He feels she's probably not the secondary virgin she claims to be.

It is a trust issue and I think it is a big issue.

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by bjayx: 9:42am On Nov 20, 2014
Dis laplace na correct guy, infact u are there
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by naijaboiy: 10:00am On Nov 20, 2014
laplace12:


Calling the guy 'first love' heightened his suspicion. He feels she's probably not the secondary virgin she claims to be.

It is a trust issue and I think it is a big issue.
hmmmm

It seems there's a lot to be uncovered then

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Nobody: 10:06am On Nov 20, 2014
Very dicey situation here.

Never go into a marriage without trust,if you don't trust her,biko free her.

Calling the guy first love might hurt,but its the simple truth..if you can't live by it,quit now.
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by sevule(m): 11:00am On Nov 20, 2014
First love?
It is definitely one of 2 thing
1. She called him that jokingly but there is actually nothing going on between the two of them
2. There is something going on between the 2 of them

From the context of the chat, I would say option 1 is most likely correct and there is nothing going on between them. However what worries me is the fact that she is still chatting with her married ex and they seem to be very close. And as par the whole molestation thing, it is definitely a lie. I believe the truth is you found her out and she quickly used molestation as an excuse for not being a virgin. If it was true she would have told you about the molestation BEFORE you had sex with her and not after.

Bro I would advise you to slow your roll. Keep marriage off the agenda for now and study your babe cos believe me she is definitely keeping secrets from you. You know what they say, marry in haste repent at leisure. So please, please and please POSTPONE all marriage plans till you are ABSOLUTELY certain that she is the right person for you.

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Alvelt14(m): 11:58am On Nov 20, 2014
Marry her and enter one chance

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by bjayx: 1:16pm On Nov 20, 2014
@ all;tanx for ur advice. January makes our courtship or watsover name its called 10 yrs. She's had intimate male friends dat i now have dirty thoughts about. Our families know eachother very well. If i decide to leave her, it'll look unfair cos she's 28+. I'll find it hard to trust her again anyway!
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by beeevan: 2:38pm On Nov 20, 2014
You are dealing with a runs girl, this girl is playing you like chess, but yet again, you have side chics too. Does it really matter who you marry?you didn't portray yourself as responsible , you too can't be trusted, we are who we attract. She is playing you just like you have been playing her.

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by bjayx: 3:11pm On Nov 20, 2014
^ sounds harsh but true.

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by valdes00(m): 3:24pm On Nov 20, 2014
Dis one is strong
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Nobody: 3:27pm On Nov 20, 2014
No she is yes not worth marrying.
Because of the following reasons.

1. Because jjkososoqoqkwhquwjkwknen jjhhjskkdke rkdkdkd diisowis sosooskesn.

2. U no that girls heart are kldoosjebbs djdoodkuwhw yjdjdhsh lsosisudhd soodidjdh

3. Sacrifice, yes sacrifice jjdkrkekejekekj ejejjwhw euueuue uueur euueuejdusje eodkkdkej rjj.

4. Understanding. wndjdjdjjejsdhuwuwhe eueuueh ejejjeuduue durueuueuw .


Thank u

2 Likes

Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Sophyrocks: 4:28pm On Nov 20, 2014
Hmm. Op, Looking at yourself, you also are not clean. You have side Chicks. You are not faithful.So whats the problem? You are scared that she could have one or two things with her Ex? Isnt he married? if you wanna be absolutely sure someone is cheating on you, you need Proof. Without it, your suspicions are baseless.

About she being worth it or not, you have every moral justification to worry about that if you are clean. If you are not, then take it that you are attracted to whom you deserve. In the end, its your choice to make.

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by bjayx: 7:31pm On Nov 20, 2014
^ so true, but if i was ur brother...would dat be ur advice?? I mean beyond d problem, which way forward?
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by passionate88: 9:17pm On Nov 20, 2014
She isn't worth it

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Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by 100Cents: 11:57pm On Nov 20, 2014
Some ladies like being familiar with everybody including their Exes. Its very wrong. I dislike it. Its an open door to infidelity.. What are you still doing with somebody you rejected and termed "Ex" which means "Past" ? If not that they still cherish the past moments spent together..

Most ladies don't have sense.

But you are not cleaner than her either.
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by ALKARULEZ615(m): 12:02am On Nov 21, 2014
Dat girl na ASHY.....trust me

Dem don wipe her like 65 times b4 den

NAIJA BABES: lying on uncles since the days of Socrates
Re: Is She Worth Marrying??? by Mobebi(m): 12:39am On Nov 21, 2014
guy, don't marry her.

and don't even think of trusting her.

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