moca:
That woman(madam of d house)is not accommodating.
The minute u accepted to be a host to people u don't know,u must as well accept their ish.

Her anger.
D lady in question is not even d wife to be.
She is a lovepeddler
She didn't greet me well.

She is not ready to be a host. Tomorrow she should better say no instead of embarrassing her hubby.

I saw worst when a would be wife of hubby's friend from away visited. Two days but I endured her ish.
Hubby was even fed up but we managed her after all she was our guest.
Will she come again tomorrow after her silly xter?

A guest is always a guest.

A classmate(who left sch)b4 me called she will come and stay with me to work on her result. I agreed for her to come and 2 to 3 days,she came back one night with a man.
I left d house for her. Till she went back,she turned my rm to what I don't know.
I hv to endure cos I accepted she will come and stay. She was my guest.

Funny enough we r close now. Really close.

delishpot:


Well, the point here is what the side chick did was wrong. That man better beware sha. She is not cool headed and sure will create more enemies for him in future. Right now it seems she is winning and he is smilling. All I know is that a good girl or guest will not respond back the way she did. Yes madam may have frowned cos she prolly knew the mans main chick and as such women will be women and frown at the "snatcher" but I doubt that the wife just entered the kitchen and started yelling. Evem if she entered and frowned a simple sorry from the chick will do the trick. I believe a good girl cant turn bad over night. She will try to make peace first and if all effort fails she will quietly move on unless attacked.
Like I said sha, I blame the husband. what respect will that woman have in her own home after this small fight?
Now I guess the chick will come visiting again and demand for the master bedroom and send madan sleeping in the sofa.

aisha2:
The myth of " your kitchen is your power" has been passed on for so long. My own power is not in the kitchen oh, I have so many other issues on my mind to be doing the " my kitchen is my world iss"

cococandy:
yea. How to be a good guest is different from how to be a good host.

I'd probably do the same like you if I were a guest because I won't want to take my host for granted but wouldn't it be nicer if my host let me know from the beginning that it is ok to use the house?

moca:


Our guest slept in our only bed while we slept at d sitting rm.
She messed up my toilet and bathroom. Enters kitchen at will. No thank u.
With her useless phonee.
That is ur guest.
Everybody must not be like u and we should learn to be accommodating.

Some will come and be as docile as dove while some were not trained that way.
Let them be.

moca:
That woman(madam of d house)is not accommodating.
The minute u accepted to be a host to people u don't know,u must as well accept their ish.

Her anger.
D lady in question is not even d wife to be.
She is a lovepeddler
She didn't greet me well.

She is not ready to be a host. Tomorrow she should better say no instead of embarrassing her hubby.

I saw worst when a would be wife of hubby's friend from away visited. Two days but I endured her ish.
Hubby was even fed up but we managed her after all she was our guest.
Will she come again tomorrow after her silly xter?

A guest is always a guest.

A classmate(who left sch)b4 me called she will come and stay with me to work on her result. I agreed for her to come and 2 to 3 days,she came back one night with a man.
I left d house for her. Till she went back,she turned my rm to what I don't know.
I hv to endure cos I accepted she will come and stay. She was my guest.

Funny enough we r close now. Really close.

aisha2:


Ehnnn a host is not a slave oh. If you act like a tout I would treat you as such you don't abuse my hospitality and expect me to grin and bear it however, as a host I would do my best to make sure you are okay, and comfortable. Before na TV i dey vex small over but thank God for PVR watch what you want I watch what i want in my room lol

soulglo:


This has nothing to do with "kitchen power". It's common courtesy. Is the guest a child? If she had a baby that needed a bottle and maybe she needed to heat it up or the host slept until 1pm and she had children to feed, or she is diabetic and has to eat at specific times etc then exceptions can be made. I can never walk into a hosts kitchen to help myself to anything if I have not been invited to do so. It is rude. You're opening up cabinets, rummaging through the refrigerator etc. It's a gross invasion of my privacy. If this was a wife or partner that the couple had a long standing relationship with then it's a different story. This was a girlfriend that they had never met. Her comment about the man not getting a hotel room further proves that she has no manners whatsoever.

moca:

Dear,I hv bn privileged to with people that host big figures.
What I learnt was,to be a good host,u hv to stomach ur pride and take ish from people cos there must be ish.
When they leave,my house belongs to me and I can do as I want.

I can only tell u I don't like what u r doing if and only if u r my friend.
If it's too much,call ur hubby by d side and tell him to communicate to d person. Eg a host smoking cigar in my house.

Read up how to be a good host.

That madam would hv turned d table by her approach.
I can smilingly say,"babes,na waa o,this one hunger no gree u sleep and u don enter kitchen this early momoo. Oya,come out,u r my guest,let me finish it up for u. What else do u want with it" even though I'm boiling inside.
She won't hv choice but to apologize and step aside. We can strike a convo and that is when I will stylishly tell her whatever she needs,she should let me know and of course,she should feel comfy.

There r ways to go about things like this.
Food kwa?

My aunt will enter d kitchen,survey and tell u to prepare for her too.
Everything must not end up in quarrel.

aisha2:


I respect your views but anyone who brings a guest is treated as a guest, I dont treat you less because you are not a wife. Her comment about the hotel was in order because she would have been free at a hotel and not be eyed and harrased by a wife who sees her as less than human because she has no ring.

For me its too much work running after guests. Like I said the lady must have insisted on a hotel while the man wanting to save cost insisted on his friends house.

delishpot:


I notice many people come to your home and missbehave. Have you wondered why? You seem to be a push over. They keep comming you keep enduring, moving out of your home, leaving your matrimonial bed for them, and all that. sheesh! No wonder sha. If me sef dey find where I go miss behave, I will call you up.

soulglo:


But why should she mention what transpired between her man and herself. I would certainly treat someone I have a relationship with different from someone I simply do not know if I walk into the kitchen and she's been through my things. Ring or no ring. This is not about the ring and not about kitchen power but I'm sure you already know that

aisha2:


You dey try, am not known for being diplomatic if it upsets me I say it oh we sort it and move on. I no dey suffering and smiling

bukatyne:


Abeg shift!

I am 100% sure you will not mind if your wife's friend came with her boyfriend who drives your car the next morning without your permission

Some guys always expect ladies to take shit as if women do not have blood flowing through their veins...

The wife has to search properly; there is something seriously wrong with her marriage and I will not be too surprised if it is hubby that is actually sleeping with the girl.

If they felt offended, it is the hubby that should apologize.

End time marriages

Modified:

The lady is very ill mannered ( I am not concerned if she is a lovepeddler or wife of the friend)

Who just enters a host's kitchen and start cooking? If she was so helpful, why did she not clear the sink or sweep the rug or another obvious chore? She could not even ask 'what are we eating this morning', 'how can I be of help' or the best method... when the host goes into the kitchen, guest follows her and helps her. If the host doesn't let her do anything, she stays there to keep her company.

carefreewannabe:
Your house, your rules!

aisha2:


Sadly her own husband doesn't share this view by making her apologise

carefreewannabe:


This is between her and her husband. She apologized to the friend and not the girl and they are out, so she got what she wanted.

damiso:
I am not sensitive about my kitchen cos you can't afford to be in this my busy schedule with no live in help.Once I have a house guest I show which freezer what and what is in, ,where crockery is etc etc. .

That said there is decorum, boundaries and manners.Just cos I don't mind does not mean i will do the same in anyone's house (maybe except my mums house as I grew up there I guess) . Its good to be accommodating but the onus lies on both guest and host.

I respect people's home as a guest.I won't take things without asking and I have had people say to me 'pls feel free' which I do but I still always consider them. Before I use the last fresh milk on the fridge for my teaI consider if there is a child im the house who might need fresh milk for their cereal the next morning. If my host forgets (like I do in my own house) I replace stuff that I notice is running low in the fridge. I clean up after myself cos I know I don't want to inconvenience them in their own house.

The chic lacks manners what happened to 'aww I am so sorry (again I keyword here' I 'people are diff won't have confronted her) I did not want to bother you or wake you up'.. Some people just like conflict sha.On top another person's house.

cococandy:

Lol@bold

The direct result of schooling women into thinking their lives revolve around the kitchen.
This OP didn't try sha, I expected her to be a lot more mature than the girl.


_{If you're a guest in my house, you're welcome to use the kitchen and pantry and help yourself to the freezer as you like.
Will even provide you bathroom essentials and house robe to keep warm and comfy}

Admittedly the girl was quite rude in her response in the kitchen and I support OP for not apologizing to her since she had already gone way out of line by that comment:

All of that fiasco could have been avoided by the OP in the first place by telling the girl she's free to use the house and make herself at home.
That's how good hostesses act.

moca:

Nne u don't know an iota about me so don't assume,it won't help.

Let me tell u, if u or ur hubby happens to be a public figure,u must be hosting every now and then.
Don't dare tarnish ur image or that of ur hubby by being d iron lady.
Ask politicians/chief executives wives.

So assuming that lovepeddler happens to be one big woman or man who felt at home there and decided not to bother anybody and prepare his/her food as she/he wants,will madam make that comment?
Assuming it's d husband's friend nko?
Will she make d comment?

Kai!

It's called training. U train urself to accept what u wouldn't hv ordinarily accepted.

delishpot:


Coming from a woman sha? Its a shame a woman like you will support what that LovePeddler did.
She is evil and does not deserve any respect from the owner of the home. If she was a good girl as you claimed she would not have attacked the madam but just say I am sorry I was hungry and did not want to wake you up. Please dont be offended.and off the stove and leave the kitchen. The bobo will see his babe is not happy and will have a talk with his pal or she later have a talk with the woman of the house to clear the air. If the madam of the house is still taking it personal, then they can move out for sanity sake. That is how you know decsent girls and can tell them from the raz ones.
A good girl will lay low and try to befriend the wife of her mans friend so as to be able to ask her some questions the men will not reveal about their pals. That girl is a LovePeddler and should be treated as such.. She had no regard for her bf and sure had none for the wife of her bfs pal.
I suspect you are just like that girl. I suspect you have entered the kitchen of a benefactor and even taken over her soup pot in her own home. I blame the women wrapers that hang out with your kind of women.
Your type will not even let their husbands sister enter their kitchen and will surely not let their mother inlaws cross the dinning area when they come to visit yet you are quick to judge another woma who asked a simple question in her home and got rejection and enimity in return.
I hope you are not a cheap push over desperate to find a husband sha. Cos I cant believe a married woman will open her mouth to say what you just said. This is why women cant unite. One I better pass you will surely come and prove to be perfect woman. See how the men united? See hiw the bf of the LovePeddler stood by his woman? And was even expecting an appology from another mans wife to his side chick I pray you marry that type of man, that will use you to serve his friends And their babes. And if you are married( which I doubt) I pray your husband will change and become like that guy.

Na condition make crayfish bend sha. Dem suppose flog that 'husband" sef.

mutter:


Agreed she is the madam in the house, but do you know the other woman. Who is she, what is her position in society or her age. Do you mean that because she follows her boyfriend to his friends house she has to take all insults?

Besides the OP did not ask if the girl misbehaved. She wanted to know if her reaction was wrong?

Get it!!!!
We should try to remain focused on her question!
Get it

Why the hell should she befriend the husbands friend to find out more about the friend?
This just shows your mentality. A relationship is based on mutual trust.

As for your weird prayers
Please stop disturbing God.

aisha2:
Since going to the kitchen is such a taboo, I don't have a live in maid if so it means if they want water they must call me, if they want a snack they must call me, if they are hungry they must call me.
I would be worn out now, when I go to work they must wait for me to get back first before they eat or drink?

bukatyne:


Going to the kitchen is not a taboo

A member of the family is 100% different from a guest.

If I have a maid/kids/relative/cook/sibling, I expect them to make meals for me before I return home or ask me what we will eat and they go ahead to prepare.

I do not expect a guest to do so.

bukatyne:


Going to the kitchen is not a taboo

A member of the family is 100% different from a guest.

If I have a maid/kids/relative/cook/sibling, I expect them to make meals for me before I return home or ask me what we will eat and they go ahead to prepare.

I do not expect a guest to do so.

Chillisauce:


if im putting myself in the girlfriends position, i wouldn't even sleep in a place where i would be treated differently. What next, How im supposed to wake them up before going to toilet? some of them madams, the toilet can be their sanctuary

I wake up most times to drink water or softdrinks, in this case i should however take permission from madam before entering her kitchen.

ANyway, people have rules, make sure you tell your guest your house rules before saying good night. Some guest that would have hangover, probably trying to fry eggs to quench the hunger and head ache will have to endure for madam the madam to wake up.

Next time madam, dont take any guest.
Or make a rule before going to bed.

Even before everyone goes to bed, we have directly or indirectly told them the rules like no smoking in the house, feel free to eat or drink whatever you want.

Madam should have told the girl, pls dont enter my kitchen. or wake me up before using the toilet.
Like i said, keep in mind exceptions before you attack someone.

aisha2:


Well I don't so guests would be shown their way round so I can relax, I am very lazy jare.



Lmao, please ma'am may I use the toilet? Hahahahahaaa, any way their house their rules, me go waka comot, no be by force to visit thank God for vex money. See wetin cheapness dey cause jare, boyfriend e haff learn him lesson. Am glad he stood up for the babe, you might regard her as side chick but he has more regards for her than madam of the house husband has for her