Hi All,

Thanks for everything. I sincerely appreciate all your responses. I think the general thought is that I should let go.

From your story, she definitely likes your friend.

If you trust your friend so much, just call him and ask him what he thinks.
If he thinks the girl likes him or not. Just find out something.
Don't be blinded in a relationship.

Ask questions before stuff gets outta hand.

this is the 2nd or 3rd relationship NL is killing today

I think I liked what viperman said. I would not go so far as throwing away a relationship so quickly. U need to take things easy. You may just b wrong.

@ thread starter

She's cheating on you already. It's only a matter of time & (un)faithfulness (on ur friends part) before they (both) start cheating on you.

Get over (with) it! The earlier, the better & healthier it'll be 4 u. . .

When a woman's mind is made up, there's nothing u can do. . .NOTHING!

@ thread starter

She's cheating on you already. It's only a matter of time & (un)faithfulness (on ur friends part) before they (both) start cheating on you.

Get over (with) it! The earlier, the better & healthier it'll be 4 u. . .

When a woman's mind is made up, there's nothing u can do. . .NOTHING!

i'll say u free the chic not because she's cheating on u,but because u both will soon be getting married, and if u cant trust someone u are about to get married to then i dont advice that u too get into it, marriage is not a thing of pitty,
As for her cheating on u,we can stand on that cos u have not caught her and she has not approached u to say anything,, i suggest u guys take a break while =you watch her response towards it

Well, it's obvious that this girl fancy your friend more than you.  If they hadn't hit it out, soon they will and you will be heart broken.  Thus, curse and blame every woman under the universe for her sins. 

I want to make this clear before it happens, no respectable girl with dignity would behave like your girl therefore, don't go cursing, name-calling every woman as wicked, lying, deceitful, back-stabbing and betraying slags as your girl because majority of women are not like that.  I suggest you investigate this thoroughly to make sure your allegations are correct.  If so, dump her and move on.  This will not only save your face and give you back your dignity but also future heartaches should you wish to marry her afterall. As for your male friend, it all depends on how strong your relationship is; if a good friend maintain the relationship but wisen up. If possible, set boundaries you both must not cross in your relationships as friend and loose the woman because a good friend is worth more than GOLD! Women come and go so do men.

Good luck!

Just try to take it easy man. Things are not always what they seems to be. Attraction and friendship with ladies are two different things.
A lady could be a friend to a man but still not attracted to him. I hope U understand?

I wrote an entire PAGE on this issue and somehow it timed out.

Anyhow, I agree with Joobreel.

#1 - Whatever your girl had to talk to you about she mentally spent time figuring out exactly what she wanted to say long before she approached you for the discussion.  With that being said, women don't make mistakes like these unless its an emotional outburst or some other sort of spontaneous expression.

So, either your girl is messing with the guy or she is talking to him about your relationship behind your back.

You have to look at their body language because we speak more with body language than words.  I will give you a couple of tips and I repeat you MUST see all or MOST of them at the same time not just one here and there to get a good idea.

When all of you link up look for the following signs and you have to look at one person at a time:

1.  Right when they meet each other do he/she fix their clothes, hair etc,  if so they are trying to look their best.

2.  Its all in the eyes.  When they first see each other do his/her eyebrows slightly raise.  This is very quick so you gotta be quick. You have to secretly look at one of them as soon as the other person appears.

3.  When one of them leaves the room, do they quickly look back to kinda say to the other person I'll be right back so behave yourself and the other person eyes give them an okay.

4.  Look at the feet.  The feet go where the mind wants to go.  When you guys are standing/sitting together is one of his/her foot pointing at each other or is it neutral. 

5.  Mirroring behavior.  He crosses his leg, she crosses hers and often times its the same leg (look at the foot again).  He picks up his drink she picks up hers.  They are in sync.

6.  She touches herself while talking to him, laughs more, touches him.

7.  Her body is turned more toward him than you. 

8.  There is little to no personal space between them when they are talking.

9.  Is she handling an object while looking at him. If so, sexual thoughts.

10.  When he is standing/sitting is he turned toward her with his legs open or with his hands on his hips pointing toward his ______?  If so he is highlighting his sexual prowess.

11.  When and if they hug upon greeting do they come close to each other at the pelvic area or do they leave space. Think about how you hug a real friend girl or a relative.

** Its best to look at her for the eyes and mirroring behavior
** Keep in mind that some of this may be hard to gauge because you all were friends to begin with but I think you will know.

If in the end you feel that she is cheating or interested in him then you need to be mature and confront her then let the chips fall where they may. Calling her out may check her.

Good luck

One

[color=#990000][/color]kill em both.LMAO

[color=#990000][/color]kill em both.LMAO

[color=#990000][/color]
They are cheating on you already .The best option to take is to forget about the whole thing and start over.

we really need to take time and study this thing called love. some times i wonder if the real name is love or "lost" cos in a real love, their shouldn't be need for cheat. but why are most women in this game of hide and seek? this days, you hardly see a faithful lady and it is getting worst day by day in Nigeria. My brother, you really have to follow your instincts. from what i have noticed lately, if a woman should ask you this question "HONEY, YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T TRUST ME?" turn back to her "SWEETY, EVEN IF YOU ARE MY MOTHER, FORGET TRUST" i'm sorry but thats how i see it.

love is unavoidable illusion, i think we should revert to Solomon's method (marry as many wife's as you can). considering the fact that one woman can't make good home this days, perhaps getting them many might help. by so doing, you will not have the time to count on the one who cheats or not. life goes on

we really need to take time and study this thing called love. some times i wonder if the real name is love or "lost" cos in a real love, their shouldn't be need for cheat. but why are most women in this game of hide and seek? this days, you hardly see a faithful lady and it is getting worst day by day in Nigeria. My brother, you really have to follow your instincts. from what i have noticed lately, if a woman should ask you this question "HONEY, YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T TRUST ME?" turn back to her "SWEETY, EVEN IF YOU ARE MY MOTHER, FORGET TRUST" i'm sorry but thats how i see it. love is unavoidable illusion.

The same thing is applicable to the married women. i think we should revert to Solomon's method (marry as many wife's as you can). considering the fact that one woman can't make good home this days, perhaps getting them many might help. by so doing, you will not have the time to count on the one who cheats or not. life goes on

She is not your wife, so why complaining? You better look for a wife and not a fiancee.

A wife wouldn't do most of what fiancees does.

Two things here; viz: One, it is very obvious that your girl really like ur friend(if your report is not biased) and two it's obvious that you are jealous. A common adage goes thus, "patient is the only tool that allows deception to reveal itself". If you're not patient enough you'll be blamed at the expense of their inadequacies. I know how u feel. You're loving somebody and the person seem to be loving another person, what a tragedy! The only way out is stop insinuating. Just call her to mind-to-mind talk, from her response you should be able to draw an inference. Remember: Mariama said in her book- SO LONG A LETTER, She advice that you should marry someone who really loves you not the one that you really love but the problem about it is How do you know who really loves you as William Shakespeare concluded that there is no art to find mind's construction in the face.
Good luck!

My guy, it depends on ur friend, if ur friend is the type that does not show stuff, I mean one that keeps secret very tight, then he has probably been giving your woman doggy somewhere in the office toilet or woeva. He be lyk sey u never know some women. What I'll advise is just to keep watching, if she is truly cheating, I swear u go catch them.

dat lady is not worth it,she's just a cheap one,i think u should let her go

while i dont really believe ur tales by moonlight, i'll like to point to the fact that i laugh when i hear of guyz sweating over a relationship,

Point is, no woman or man is worth the trouble.

live your life man, u dont even need to suspect, face your future and see as things unfold, u  get plans to buy Range at all? why na woman u dey bother yourself over?, if she likes your friend,the message is free her, simple

might not even be her fault,maybe your friend acts more matured or reasonable than you, If your friend ''AS YOU SAID'' dint look at her face when he was leaving and ''YOU'' did,then you have a serious problem she's not comfortable with.

check yourself before you wreck yourself bro, , loss of confidence and dignity, innit?

guy e don be for u ooooooooooooooo!

una don start again with all these tales by moon light stories this 2009 bah? make una give the bottle a rest oooo

hra:

Hi All,

I need your candid opinions on these:

I am a relationship that is 1 year old. Before I started dating my woman, we were friends and we had another male friend. We were all close before we started dating. Since we started dating, we have had ups and downs.

Anytime we have issues, my woman never shows it off outside, she smiles and acts as if nothing is wrong but whenever this guy is there, she will show that something is wrong and paint me bad. Sometimes ago, the three of us were together at my place and my friend said he is leaving and my woman looked at him in a way that says: 'wont you wait and walk me?' my friend didnt see that look and he left, as soon as he left, my woman asked me 'are u going to walk me or not?' and i answered so that u can call him back to walk you? I confronted her with the two expressions and she affirmed that i was correct and she apologized. It caused a big issue in the relationship.

A few days back, she came to my house from work and she wanted to talk about something and she called the guy's name enthusiatically. I was amazed and she said its because she was tired.

What do you guys think? I trust my friend and I think my woman just likes the guy. I think the guy doesnt really know my woman likes him that much. I am almost certain they are not dating but I am no longer comfortable with her friendship with the guy. The place where she works now is the company of the guy's inlaw and they see all the time and are always together.

dunnit! ! ! you just gave up all my secrets , now i have to shop for new body language

MsFlorida:

I wrote an entire PAGE on this issue and somehow it timed out.

Anyhow, I agree with Joobreel.

#1 - Whatever your girl had to talk to you about she mentally spent time figuring out exactly what she wanted to say long before she approached you for the discussion.  With that being said, women don't make mistakes like these unless its an emotional outburst or some other sort of spontaneous expression.

So, either your girl is messing with the guy or she is talking to him about your relationship behind your back.

You have to look at their body language because we speak more with body language than words.  I will give you a couple of tips and I repeat you MUST see all or MOST of them at the same time not just one here and there to get a good idea.

When all of you link up look for the following signs and you have to look at one person at a time:

1.  Right when they meet each other do he/she fix their clothes, hair etc,  if so they are trying to look their best.

2.  Its all in the eyes.  When they first see each other do his/her eyebrows slightly raise.  This is very quick so you gotta be quick. You have to secretly look at one of them as soon as the other person appears.

3.  When one of them leaves the room, do they quickly look back to kinda say to the other person I'll be right back so behave yourself and the other person eyes give them an okay.

4.  Look at the feet.  The feet go where the mind wants to go.  When you guys are standing/sitting together is one of his/her foot pointing at each other or is it neutral. 

5.  Mirroring behavior.  He crosses his leg, she crosses hers and often times its the same leg (look at the foot again).  He picks up his drink she picks up hers.  They are in sync.

6.  She touches herself while talking to him, laughs more, touches him.

7.  Her body is turned more toward him than you. 

8.  There is little to no personal space between them when they are talking.

9.  Is she handling an object while looking at him. If so, sexual thoughts.

10.  When he is standing/sitting is he turned toward her with his legs open or with his hands on his hips pointing toward his ______?  If so he is highlighting his sexual prowess.

11.  When and if they hug upon greeting do they come close to each other at the pelvic area or do they leave space. Think about how you hug a real friend girl or a relative.

** Its best to look at her for the eyes and mirroring behavior
** Keep in mind that some of this may be hard to gauge because you all were friends to begin with but I think you will know.

If in the end you feel that she is cheating or interested in him then you need to be mature and confront her then let the chips fall where they may. Calling her out may check her.

Good luck

One

na2day?:

dunnit! ! ! you just gave up all my secrets , now i have to shop for new body language

ashewo kobo-kobo

dremoney:

ashewo kobo-kobo

dude, wetin bi ur own, abi i take ur gf? mind urself b4 i raise gbege 4 ur head!

@ poster,
this is serious long tinnnn.
anyways, if nothing has happened it might happen soonest with reference to your first post.
but dis aint a problem at all.
Just as Viperman pointed out, do not feel defeated.
Ignore the observations and eye flirtings.
Zero yur mind.
Distract her too.
This might not be the best advice but it is a test to know if she would fight to get your love back.
Get another babe into yur life. But endeavour not to get intimate with the nu gal.
She will be yur bait.
Make yur fiancee kno of dis gal and her intent to lay yu at all cost, but explain yu ve bin declining
Show proofs of text messages.
Two tins will happen:
If she loves yu dearly, she will grip on to yu and yu will c a change in her attitude towards yur friend (thus Spikedcylinder is right, don't jump d gun)
If she loves yu not, she would care less and formalise her affair wit yur paddy.
Nothing to worry reali it happens in some relationships.
I have been subjected to wat yur friend is goin tru in d past.
Wanted to lay her at all cost until i found out the fiance was a friend.
We all started to stay togeda and dis did not stop her showing her likeness for me before her fiance.
She sits on my laps before her bobo and other friends especialy wen dey ve quarrels. W all laugh it off. But i cld feel he wasn't all dat ok wit our friendship
She harasses any oda gal she sees wit me making noise about why i wld be cheatin on mai main babe.
We were left togeda for 2weeks(everyone traveled) sleeping on same bed and i can tell yu without mincing words that nothing happened.
Gradually d feelings subsided.
Anyways, he dumped her for someone else, reasons best known to him. But I can guess he feels somethin must have ensued between his fiancee and I.
So no big deals.
All in all yu got to live yur life. Babes plenty. Quoting Viperman again, never leave yur paddy because of Obirin ooooo.

So its the general consensus that they are both cheating then? What happened to benefit of doubt? Nawa for people o!

@ Spikedcylinder,

no maam. it aint a general consensus dat dey ar both cheating.
it aint comfortable either for one's fiancee to flirt with one's friend either openly or covertly.
he obviously needs to put her in check before he looses his brains.

My friend, it is a pity your friend and your girlfriend are cheating on you, u dont need a diviner to tell u that and that does not guarantee you will stop loving her (when u find out she is having an affair with your friend).

My advice to u is that u should be wise as a tortise, cunning as a viper and strike when they list expect u to.

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Show nothing of your anger to them because your friend has all the aces man

To me, betrayal should be punished.


One love brotha!

That your friend is wicked, she is not a good friend, don't give up.