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Dallas ,TX – Saturday night ended in a tragedy for 23 year old Alan Escamilla. According to reports Alan Escamilla was struck by lightning while he was masturbating in his bedroom.
According to Dallas MD, Alan Escamilla was masturbating in his bedroom, before a massive bolt of lightning struck him.When police and ambulance arrived on the scene, they found Alan Escamilla, which “looked like burnt coal”, according to Officer Bryan Granados.
Alans parents rushed to his bedroom where they heard a loud boom and saw Alan Escamilla in a masturbating position, with his hand wrapped tightly around his penis. Alan Escamilla father said his sons body was rock hard but he was breathing heavily and very much alive.
“This like a sign from God” says the family church pastor Oscar Reyes, Who lives 2 houses down from Alan Escamilla. According to Alan Escamilla’s family and friends, Alan was a chronic masturbator, masturbating up to 5 times a day, and it is no surprise that he was struck by lighting while masturbating.
“If there was one thing about Alan, it’s that he masturbated all the time, Once he spent 4 hours in my restroom just masturbating I had to force him out my apartment” says long time friend of Alex Godoy. Alan Escamilla is expected to fully recover according to Baylor Hospital.

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It still doesn't change the price of kulikuli in the market...



Abeg this must not make first page oooo

What do you have to say about this
cc:
vaselinecrew
dharay99.

My nigga go low-key for where he dey now ni... If hin joystick raise head lasan! He go cut am comot ni.

;;;

I don't believe it!

chai!... xo he didnt av any gf

Coincidence

Story for the gods, have you ever been shocked by Electric current and ur hands remain in the same place ?

FADA LawD...

Moral lesson ...before buying vaseline please first get your copper for lighting conduction.

dharay99:

ionne bliv dat write up buh if at all dis is real, then its much expected...
Ryt from my young age i know n bliv self service is a sin.

Some ppl will come here and say all sort of crap like, its gud 2 S.service, it keeps u away from HIV, unwanted pregnancy etc...

I was almost convinced to bliv its true buh sumtin happnd along d way....m hapi im still on it dat self service na sin, maybe dats y he got d thunder stuff.

all right.

The gods are not to be blamed

Chai!

Immediately I saw d topic I jux started laughing! That guy own don too much, e fit be say him don self-service till him children brain comot, na only slowpoke sperm remain so sango did d needful