I don't know why some people go through a lot of pain, she gave birth sometime ago, and d baby died before naming, she even got married very late. Now all her sisters have children and she has been very sober. Her husband called me few hrs ago that he saw a letter that she wrote abt her going to die if God doesn't answer her. He's been keeping an eye on her, he saw the negative blood test result she's been piling every month, without his knowledge. I spoke with her, the entire family and friends av called her, she sounded well, then I went to see her, and she broke in tears that she is tired, and upon all her being very decent while growing up, never had abortions or anything. She said she's not going to church again. This has been disturbing me honestly, sorry for the long posts, pls how can I help her, my other family members are very far away. She's tried all, this life sef

Sometimes in life. The best things don't come as at when expected. The whole family should stand by her now in her trying time, it would surely come good. It is well

okotv:
Sometimes in life. The best things don't come as at when expected. The whole family should stand by her now in her trying time, it would surely come good. It is well

but why do some people have it easy. Honestly she made me doubt my faith for a second. Her husband is so scared, she even wrote how she intend to kill herself. She's always smiling and he never noticed.

ariyibioladokun:
but why do some people have it easy. Honestly she made me doubt my faith for a second. Her husband is so scared, she even wrote how she intend to kill herself. She's always smiling and he never noticed.

Life is a mystery. Solve it.

I wish this can get to front page, so she can read it. She visits nairaland often. Pls house anybody gone tru this b4, any good hospital for recommendation,

It's a pity bro, but your sister should take it easy. She is married and atleast has proven she is capable of having babies. All she needs is a positive attitude and faith in God. I know that her biological clock is clicking, but she is not barren. God that did it before is very capable of doing it again. Tell your in-law to try as much as possible to take her mind off the child issue. Make her understand that he loves her no matter what. Cuddle with her, take her out on long walks, movies etc and try and relax her mind.

Just keep encouraging her.There are others who have had it worse than her.One good thing about tomorrow is that there can always be a change..........a positive one at that.She can still have her babies.

If she can read,there's a thread on suicide here in this section.Show it to her

It is not easy when u are bn faced with the challenges of life. I would like her to read about Abraham, Ruth and Hannah so that she can undestand that working with God takes a lot of patience and calm. I wouldn't want her to tow the line of suicide becos killing oneself is a very grievous sin but she should fast and pray fervently and also read her bible always. Nothing in this life has no end. I believe God wil see ha tru.

She should try artificial insemination or she should go to the herbalist (not juju priest) there are certain herbal concotion that will help her concieve and it is mostly different types of roots soaked in water or gin ogogoro. Please it is not juju and i repeat not juju.

She flarred up when I told her to read the suicidal posts, she just wants to punish herself, she said she will cut herself in bits, that if she's born to feel pain, let her feel the greatest one . Honestly, I never imagind someone so close to me will think of suicide

deleib:
It is not easy when u are bn faced with the challenges of life. I would like her to read about Abraham, Ruth and Hannah so that she can undestand that working with God takes a lot of patience and calm. I wouldn't want her to tow the line of suicide becos killing oneself is a very grievous sin but she should fast and pray fervently and also read her bible always. Nothing in this life has no end. I believe God wil see ha tru.

she has always been the spiritual one sef, encouraging us to go for programs,now she said she's not going again. She's angry! After shedding little tear, she cleaned her face and wanted to cook for me, I know she's dying inside. She's such a precious person, I can't even tell my mum, she will just collapse, her husband is a very busy man. He tries to make out time for her, she's not d demanding type sef. He's always very happy, but when he showed me the letter he started weeping, that if only he can make babies

ariyibioladokun:
She flarred up when I told her to read the suicidal posts, she just wants to punish herself, she said she will cut herself in bits, that if she's born to feel pain, let her feel the greatest one . Honestly, I never imagind someone so close to me will think of suicide

show her thru google about artificial insemination hospital in lagos in order to encourage her i will suggest you go with her to the hospital.
http://www.google.com/xhtml?q=Hospital%20for%20artificial%20insemination%20in%20lagos%20nigeria&client=ms-opera_mb_no&channel=bh

First things first. She is due for a change of environment. The husband should as a matter of urgency arrange a gateaway to a place she has always fantasised about- her neverland.

The current setting is choking her up. She needs motivation and inspiration. Her husband has a lot of work to do for only him truly understands the real nature of the woman he married and the best possible way to get to her.

2cato:
show her thru google about artificial insemination hospital in lagos in order to encourage her i will suggest you go with her to the hospital.
http://www.google.com/xhtml?q=Hospital%20for%20artificial%20insemination%20in%20lagos%20nigeria&client=ms-opera_mb_no&channel=bh

thanks I will

Chubhie:
First things first. She is due for a change of environment. The husband should as a matter of urgency arrange a gateaway to a place she has always fantasised about- her neverland.

The current setting is choking her up. She needs motivation and inspiration. Her husband has a look of work to do for only him truly understands the real nature of the woman he married and the best possible way to get to her.

thanks I will inform him right away too. I know she won't die by Gods grace, cos am very scared now.

ariyibioladokun:
thanks I will inform him right away too. I know she won't die by Gods grace, cos am very scared now.

Tell her that This too shall pass. She also has a great family that loves and supports her. She needs to look at the bright side. All the very best.

I pray God sees her through

she's depressed, obviously from all that have happened. she should see a medical professional. she'll probably be placed on some antidepressants and counselling sessions.

Chubhie:
Tell her that This too shall pass. She also has a great family that loves and supports her. She needs to look at the bright side. All the very best.

thanks

If they can afford it, why don't they visit a Fertility Clinic? It just might help Sad to hear this and wishing her baby dust soonest.

she is depressed. after all she has been thru, no wonder. she lost her baby , that's more than enough to make someone depressed. continue to encourage her and be her confidant, let her know she's not alone, will get thru this. she should see a therapist too, they'll teach her how to cope and ways to get thru each day she seems to have a good husband which's great . she needs his love more than ever. when they're ready and she's in a healthier state of mind they should try having another baby.

aflyingbird:
she is depressed. after all she has been thru, no wonder. she lost her baby , that's more than enough to make someone depressed. continue to encourage her and be her confidant, let her know she's not alone, will get thru this. she should see a therapist too, they'll teach her how to cope and ways to get thru each day she seems to have a good husband which's great . she needs his love more than ever. when they're ready and she's in a healthier state of mind they should try having another baby.

but she acts fine and normal, they can't afford fertility clinic, but as a family we will raise funds, but her hubby might not like the idea. He's d only child, so from my family we can raise more

ariyibioladokun:
I don't know why some people go through a lot of pain, she gave birth sometime ago, and d baby died before naming, she even got married very late. Now all her sisters have children and she has been very sober. Her husband called me few hrs ago that he saw a letter that she wrote abt her going to die if God doesn't answer her. He's been keeping an eye on her, he saw the negative blood test result she's been piling every month, without his knowledge. I spoke with her, the entire family and friends av called her, she sounded well, then I went to see her, and she broke in tears that she is tired, and upon all her being very decent while growing up, never had abortions or anything. She said she's not going to church again. This has been disturbing me honestly, sorry for the long posts, pls how can I help her, my other family members are very far away. She's tried all, this life sef

I am so sorry to hear this..But tell your sister that in due time God will answer her prayers and she should not think for a minute that he is not.She should not lose hope and always pray.I know of a couple that just had their child this year after ten years of trying.God might even bless her with twins or triplets who knows..Just tell her to keep thanking God for the children that he has already given to her.pls let her read Habakkuk 2:3

Please contact me I have avery. Good doc I can recommend for her I bet u she would concive. The doctors wife had issues for years but as a gynacolodist he handled it.

She will smile again,tell her to keep her hopes up in God,He will give her joy in due time,i pray that He will shine his face upon her in ds dark times,if she visits the hosiptal,shell thank God for her own!

She and the husband need to go to a good hospital and do all the tests. To see if they are genetically compatible. If such facilities aee not available here in Nigeria, they should travel out and get the confirmation they need. Then they should put plans up about trying to conceive, plus be realistic in case things don't work out. The husband needs to talk to her and reassure her about whether kids are more important than her life. Truly at this point she is thinking about how to secure her home with kids. If the husband can assure her that such is not necessary I am sure it will go a long way to ease the suicidal thoughts. I wish her the best. But she should know that she is not the first, neither will she be the last to lose a child. But people get up and keep trying. She could also be suffering from postpartum depression in addition to depression about the loss. You should consider taking her to a mental health specialist.

baby124:
She and the husband need to go to a good hospital and do all the tests. To see if they are genetically compatible. If such facilities aee not available here in Nigeria, they should travel out and get the confirmation they need. Then they should put plans up about trying to conceive, plus be realistic in case things don't work out. The husband needs to talk to her and reassure her about whether kids are more important than her life. Truly at this point she is thinking about how to secure her home with kids. If the husband can assure her that such is not necessary I am sure it will go a long way to ease the suicidal thoughts. I wish her the best. But she should know that she is not the first, neither will she be the last to lose a child. But people get up and keep trying. She could also be suffering from postpartum depression in addition to depression about the loss. You should consider taking her to a mental health specialist.

they did all d tests during the first 5years of marriage, compatibility u mean genoptype right and fertility tests

She needs a psychologist,and a good doctor. Life is Mystery,some had it good,and some fair.

She shouldn't be left alone,God forbids she carries out her threat.

She needs to. Have patient,hope she reads her bible often?

Yomieluv:
She needs a psychologist,and a good doctor. Life is Mystery,some had it good,and some fair.

She shouldn't be left alone,God forbids she carries out her threat.

She needs to. Have patient,hope she reads her bible often?

her husband said she reads her bible o, she keeps acting normal

ariyibioladokun:
her husband said she reads her bible o, she keeps acting normal

there is a specialist in ubth.

First of all,she needs counseling. As a matter of urgency. Pls help her get it if possible.
Losing a child especially when she's wanted it for so long can be very traumatizing. I don't need to experience that to know it. I can almost feel her pain. Pls seek professional help on her behalf.

*********
On a general note, this is why it is not good to expect so much from life. It helps when one has at the bottom of their consciousness that anything can happen to anyone. All those notions "I was a Virgin, why am I suffering this while the randy girl is having it easy": is just us thinking we deserve to be rewarded for something we think we've done right and then when it doesn't come, we begin to feel something somewhere is punishing us.

Life can be random like that. It does not mean she's created to feel pain. Pls tell her to remove that line from her mind.

Well said @cococandy.

Life is not mathematical @ all. May God intervene in her condition.

This year is her year. She shld hold on to her faith. It is well.