leave him alone, but next time you see him, hit his stupid head with a big big stick.

JustGood:

So it is only Nigerians ehnn?

Where exactly do you live where everyone seems to be a saint? People break each others' hearts all over the world- not peculiar to Nigeria.
How many foreigners have you actually LIVED with to see how they also manipulate themselves?
How many churches are in America also decieving and manipulating gullible people?
How many people lost money to fraudulent investment 'gurus' in America?

My point is that Nigeria is not unique in those things. Of course Nigeria has many faults of her own but to simply put Nigeria into the equation whenever someone does something wrong is not the correct way to analyse things.

mr just good this is NL. what is your problem? do i have to seek your counsel before airing my opinions? this thread is about a nigerian man deceiving a woman just like the women do too how do you bring american investment fraud here>  

should nigerians be playing and destroying peoples confidence becos americans are doing fraud?
what else would you like me to blame americans for?

nawa 4 u ooo

JJYOU:

mr just good this is NL. what is your problem? do i have to seek your counsel before airing my opinions? this thread is about a nigerian man deceiving a woman just like the women do too how do you bring american investment fraud here>

should nigerians be playing and destroying peoples confidence becos americans are doing fraud?
what else would you like me to blame americans for?

nawa 4 u ooo

What exactly then is the problem with me also airing my opinion on your opinion?
It is not specifically about Nigerian men but you made it out to be about Nigerian men. . .it was about a man!

That is man in reality for you. Relax at least you are out of it with your senses. Get on with your life and define what you want in a relationship and you have got to be a bit selfish, develop yourself etc. Don't expect people to be faithful and truthful but be truthful to yourself, do a bit of research and learn a bit of psychology you will need it to survive with men expecially if they are African and more so from Nigeria. You have to be wise and i tell you never date a married man thinking he will divorce her for you. You might save yourself a bit of headache by speaking to the wife before you decide to marry a divorcee. Men very funny and as long as you make yourself available they will keep on lying or manipulating you. Giving you a key does not mean he does not have anybody they are great game player if they so wish.

As with his family, there is nothing they can do on your part and you should be lucky this sister manage to tell you that a the man has a new baby. If not you will still be in the deceit wagon if you so wish and you might end up becoming one of his baby making maching.

Get on with life and shine your eyes well well.

Best of luck

JustGood:

What exactly then is the problem with me also airing my opinion on your opinion?
It is not specifically about Nigerian men but you made it out to be about Nigerian men. . .it was about a man!

you are exhibiting the problem naija men and women have with ease. how come you dont have problems with people taking advantage of others like our people do without shame

JJYOU:

you are exhibiting the problem naija men and women have with ease. how come you dont have problems with people taking advantage of others like our people do without shame

you are exhibiting the problem people who feel inferior exhibit with ease. Why is it that you dont go and find out if other men do it before you start speaking for Nigerians?

JustGood:

you are exhibiting the problem people who feel inferior exhibit with ease. Why is it that you dont go and find out if other men do it before you start speaking for Nigerians?

you will not get the licence to continue your deception with ease from me. majority of you are frauds and criminals in the way you go leading people you should have no business with into false relationships.

get over yourself and stop trying to defend unacceptable behaviours.

so the guy forgot he had a wife and son. WOW!

JJYOU:

you will not get the licence to continue your deception with ease from me. majority of you are frauds and criminals in the way you go leading people you should have no business with into false relationships.

get over yourself and stop trying to defend unacceptable behaviours.

I sense that you have a bitterness towards Nigerians.

busy bodi, this is nigerians for you.  mostly  bad belle people

Not really my business but you dont have to go around trying to label us all as evil simply because you were unable to achieve some things which you thought you could have achieved.

JustGood:

I sense that you have a bitterness towards Nigerians.

Not really my business but you dont have to go around trying to label us all as evil simply because you were unable to achieve some things which you thought you could have achieved.

i generally dont have time for people like you. what am i trying to achieve? deceive a nigerian woman into relationship that i know i am not prepared for or what? label you. u that effortlessly without my assistance. are you insinuating i am behind all the men/women telling lies to the men/women complaining in various threads here?

you have issues. the bad belle word you pasted was taken from the thread you and your likes were showing hatred for another nigerian woman. you hate truth. why cant you condemn the idiot doing this non sence rather than trying to justify nigerians stupidity with americans are doing it.

that is my last word on this.

I am sinceley proposing that there should be a law enabling women to pronounce men 419 for chopping thier thing under false pretence punishable by hanging .abi what  is  nairalanders thinking

Bishop:

I am sinceley proposing that there should be a law enabling women to pronounce men 419 for chopping thier thing under false pretence punishable by hanging .abi what  is  nairalanders thinking

nice one but you know how many NL dudes will go under.

With all the guys out there, why would someone go for a fairly used one? Or is it your 'purchasing power' miss?

More seriously, I don't quite get the reason why lots of people choose to deceive themselves. Why would you still stick around after someone tells you he FORGOT his wife and son. Is he a slowpoke?

Bishop:

I am sinceley proposing that there should be a law enabling women to pronounce men 419 for chopping thier thing under false pretence punishable by hanging .abi what  is  nairalanders thinking

It cuts both ways

@ JJYOU
Stop generalizing puleaseee! It's a case of a fraudulent man and hence not equal to labelling it all Nigerian men

@Poster
Take heart, its life. D guy is a scum, just see it as experience acquired which will equip you to have a better and deciet free life. Move on

sosodat:

It cuts both ways

@ JJYOU
Stop generalizing puleaseee! It's a case of a fraudulent man and hence not equal to labelling it all Nigerian men

Thank you o.

The guy will vent his Nigerian hatred on you if you dont simmer for him

what happened to all the old american women using young Nigerian men to satisfy their thirst for companionship and the boys also getting into it knowing that they are only in it for the passports/greencards? Is that not a case of love 419 from both sides?

For me as pathetic as your story sounds, i seem to have a few misgivings.

1. How come its your guy's younger sis that is carrying a new baby on her back?
2. You give us the impression that his sibs like you, so y would one of them spite you this way?

If your story is true, u know what to do, So if nairalanders tell you to continue, you will continue abi? Spend time in the presence of God. Attend midweek services in your church if your a christian. Like i have always said, the beauty about how God created the heart is that no matter how hurt you are , the hearbreak can still mend. Its a matter of time. I promise you'll find happiness again by the grace of God.

Always remember, no one on NL is better than you, dont let anyone run your self esteem down. We are all equal before God. Who is perfect amongst us, let him or her raise their hands.

All the best sis.

Some serious stuff Going on wid you mennn! anyways, get you another dude and next time u set your eyes on the one that F'd up - SMILE AND STICK OUT YOUR MIDDLE FINGER AT HIM --[color=#990000][/color]

So do you need to be told that you have to leave this man. Husband to be!!!!!!!!!!! You are free woman. Don't be a fool. He is a liar.

My dear,pls beware of married or engaged men in the future.Look out for single prospective young men,with whom u can build your future.
Also not every single guys are serious or ready 2 settledown, the problem we ladies have is that wen we are in our 20s we tend 2 be so desperate. guys know wen we ladies are so desperate and so takes advantage of dat. girl u need 2 pick up the remains of ur broken heart and move on. we learn from our personal experiences.

i'm always amazed about how naija girls allow themselves to be used like this.4 Gods sake the guy told you he FORGET! to tell you about his wife and children!PLEASEEE.that should have sent alarm bells ringing in you head.and to think he'l leave his wife and children 4 you?get a life girl.you are lucky he didnt get you preggy and leave you!

My sister, this shows you are not fully matured no matter your age! Anyway, I feel you should go and do a pregnancy test: If you find yourself pregnant, marry him as a second wife (that will be the reward for your stupid and blind love). If you are not pregnant quit and continue a new life. You are a simple and sincere girl. I trust God to give you a husband that will be sincere to you.

Good Luck.

@ Poster,

You supposed to had know this from the onset that he wasnt yours. How can a man tell you he wants to divorce his wife (ex-wife) as you call it, to marry you? what makes you feel if he had married you would still not use the same broom to sweep you out?

I dont know why our youngstars (most especially ladies) of today are just rushing for marriage and they dont care who they date what they are told.

Marriage is not feelings but reality. My dear forget about that guy and move forward. I think this is a big lesson for you to learn from.

This goes for all the single ladies in the house, have prestige and add value to yourself dont just jump at any man just because he said he wants to marry you. take you time to really know him and know if it is the will of God for you.

My dear poster, just thank you God that the marriage had not happened bcoz it would had been more devastating for you than now.

Remain blessed as the real one is just by the corner waiting for that smile.

Smile Jesus loves you.

im very sure the MAGA used jazz on you,if not this wuldnt have happened.i also think that you are a naive gal,for you to believe all that crap he gave you.Anyway sha, all the best

hi, though its hard for me to believe this story; since you guys have been moving from yours to his family.
But my advice is this, just leave the guy and get a better guy, very simple,

Thank God you knew before saying i do.
Move on and i am sure someone better is out there for you.
Good luck

JustGood:

what happened to all the old american women using young Nigerian men to satisfy their thirst for companionship and the boys also getting into it knowing that they are only in it for the passports/greencards? Is that not a case of love 419 from both sides?

i dont know where you live but you must be very naive to think there are old american women using young Nigerian men to satisfy their thirst for companionship  

just picture a group of senior citizens lining up for their pick of nigerian security guards, cab drivers and what have you as if their lives depends on it.

i am old enough to know right from wrong. you dont have to deceive people to get ahead in life. this  is very difficult for people like you to understand.  you should be angry with your likes who see nothing wrong in deceiving people for fun or finance.

in case you missed it there is a write up by oluwdashmi another deceived sister here.

what else do you want to do other than declare to him that you have caught him and walk away. Although it is painful depending on how long you are able to put yourself together but life goes on. As for your family, don't tell them anything but if they ask you about him, tell them you are no longer together.

I am a victim of your story but in my own case, it was the wife that called me and was weeping badly on phone as if she was dying. She kept crying and begging me to stay away from her husband cos he has been a different person ever since he met me (she knew me thru calls and text msgs). Although, I noticed the guy is cunny and finds it difficult answering some of my questns about marriage but I decided to be calm until his secret is revealed.

Immediately, I called my guy but he denied it saying the lady is a blackmailer and that I shouldn't mind her. I pretended as if his explanation was understanding but called the wife and we both met. She told me how he has been maltreating her, how he has promised to divorce her before the end of 2008 and that she has been crying for days. Infact her eyes were swollen and she kept crying in the eatery where we met and I was even the one cosoling her. The wife and I planned to keep it secret that we ever met then I turned him to a money making machine.

This is a guy who comes visiting my pple as a son in-law to be. Anyway, I didn't tell them anything and they never asked about him cos they said they prayed about it but received a msg that I should be careful.

But sha, I showed the guy.

sosodat:

It cuts both ways

@ JJYOU
Stop generalizing puleaseee! It's a case of a fraudulent man and hence not equal to labelling it all Nigerian men

 how did i label it all nigerian men?  
can i ask why it is difficult for some of you to say what  a man or nigerian did is wrong

U are asking fullish Q(sorry to say, didn't mean 2 insult u), by asking what u suppose to be the next thing u suppose to do. May be u don't know sha abi u know but because love don blind u, u know wan to be sincere with urself. U beter close yah eyes n make the best decision for urself.
ok, may be u dont know, let me remind u , next thin is to rrrrrrrruuuuuuuuunnnnnnnn for ur HAPPINESS.

if you arent that daft you shouldnt have ask from fellow nairalanders what you will do in this kind of situation.
that is what ladies who are after materials things see this is just the begining not until he has 20 children outside before you come back to your senses, go for deliverance coz u get problem.

I dont see how bashing her is going to make this any better.

Have not all at some point in our love lives been deceived by at least one partner?  And when that partner came up with some lame ass excuse did we not believe them because we were in love and believed that they were in love too, so they must be telling the truth?  Have you not gotten that gut feeling or that voice in the back of your head but you still ignored it because you were in love?

this sista made a mistake because of love.

She believed that because she had a key to his place and was free to go and come as she pleases that he was not hiding anything, so when the child and wife appeared he lied some more to her and she believed him.

The best way to hide anything is in plain sight.  When your partner has nothing to hide, or so you think, then you let your guard down and you trust more than you would if he was hiding stuff; like password protected cell phones, secret phone calls, refusing to give you a key, etc.

Could it also be, just playing devils advocate, that he was indeed separated from his wife but they had sex one night 9 months ago and she got pregnant but refused to abort the baby because he was divorcing her and she wanted to hold on to her man?

Sista I dont blame you for falling in love and believing that this man that met your parents, swore his undying love for you, proposed marriage, planned a future for you and him, lied and deceived you.  I am sorry that this happened and hope that you find the one that make your heart leap for joy again and his love will be true.

I would not want to be in your place feeling the hurt you are feeling and you are in my prayers.

(that is coming from a married woman)

JJYOU:

i dont know where you live but you must be very naive to think there are old american women using young Nigerian men to satisfy their thirst for companionship

The fact that you dont know that there are western women who do this leaves me with no choice but to discontinue this. Get out a little more. Get a job or something where you meet more people and you might see a little more than you know now.

You dont know what happens and you refer to another person as naive