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My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth - Literature - Nairaland

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My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by damiloladuke: 11:18am On Jul 11, 2015
This was my baptism into the real world of love affairs. I happened to be a very shy dude since my childhood, especially in my primary school days. It is said that brilliant students always find it hard interacting with girls in those days. Things have changed now, I must say. You would see an 11 year old girl writing a quit letter to her boyfriend, telling him she saw him with another girl in the park. OMG, when did they start dating? While they were sucklings or what? Something needs to be done.

In my primary school days, the only thing I knew how to do well was fantasize, I would like you in my mind and we would be close friends in my mind, I would take you all around the world, fly you in my airplane, be your hero, care for you. All in my mind.

I remember admiring a senior student then, Mary, she was so beautiful, anytime I came across her during lunch break, I just started stalking her, everywhere she went. I would do that until break was over. Well I was so young then, so I was not sure I had anything to say. Damn I just remember now that I was 6 years of age in Class 5. How did it happen? Well I wouldn't have had anything to convince the girl with then anyway.

I also remembered admiring Tilewa Benson. This young girl was so beautiful, she looked like the Princess in Disneyland Cartoons. But years later when we met at an Event, she had so much depreciated in value from what she was in primary school. Perhaps, the engine had been put to vigorous usage without much service from the technicians.

I wouldn't even say I had a single girlfriend in my High school days. Girls loved me, no doubt due to my brilliance and cuteness. But they just considered me too young to date. How will it be when you were the youngest in about 700 students of a certain year. And remember how it was in those days now when your senior students already had a family of their own.

You would see students in SS1 with fully grown beards, you would think they have a permanent appointment with the school as some of them had repeated a class for about 3 times. I remember Senior Emeka, this guy had the look of Didier Drogba in SS3, who was that teacher that wanted to look into the eye of the Lion, they dared not.

The moment Sen.Emeka called you or beckoned at you, just begin to recite either the Lords prayer or the Grace. No one needed to tell you that you were gonna part with your lunch money and God help you that you had nothing on you. You would assume the work of a Mechanic on that day as he would take you to his class, draw a car on the board and ask you to push. Oh God, your face must be panel bitted on that day, surely.

It all dawned on Emeka one day when he called a Junior Student, Kunle Oridota, this guy was in my class and guess what, as his name implied, he knew nothing, his head had rusted. But he was also old and huge. Emeka asked him to go buy him burger with Tasty Time and as well bring N5 change without giving him a dime.


This guy refused as it was the tradition of the Senior students to seize your sandals to ensure you would be back for it. Oridota refused to take off his sandals and he got a huge slap from Emeka. Emeka was so shocked when Oridota returned the slap. The crazy part was Emeka was not expecting such, so the slap practically mesmerized him, he fell to the ground immediately he got the 'Reset Button'on his face. Before he knew it, Oridota had approached him, lifted him and was bringing him down to the JS3 Block, we knew we were in soup that day. Because what happened afterwards could be likened to the battle The NIGERIAN ARMY is presently facing with the insurgents.

....gotta go take my bath....



Source: http://www.wenogetjob.com/2015/07/my-first-heart-break-1-21.html

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Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by damiloladuke: 11:20am On Jul 11, 2015
PART 2


Oridota brought Senior Emeka to our class room and asked him to kneel. The senior refused and was asking Oridota if he knew the consequences of what he was doing. Some of us in the classroom were already excusing ourselves because we knew the outcome would never be favourable, while some other students were in support of what Oridota was doing. I knew information would have gotten to the SS3 Block, I just, in the company of other friends, jumped the classroom window and went straight into the school Jungle.


Like we were on clue, the moment we left was when the whole SS3 students numbering about 600 were all trooping to our block. The Junior students were also ready for them as words have gotten to other classes and everyone was on guard. The students had armed themselves with Planks and stones, which the Senior did not envisage. They never thought we would pose any form of defense. The moment they moved some perimeters close to our block, they got the unexpected, Junior students began to pelt them with stones and Ice water. No one knew how they got the pack of water under such short notice.

What actually started as a plan to come punish the hell out of the Junior students, eventually turned into a blood bath as the senior students that were so unfortunate got hit by stones and sustained an injury in one way or the other.

At that moment, the school principal had sent someone to bring the Police as there had not been a means of phone communication in those days. Though the students were not aware of that and so were still carrying on the battle. The Senior students reinforced with the help of the other year classes and it all escalated into a free for all battle.

The battle at Waterloo, would still be in practice compared to what happened on that day. Just like in the movies, everyone began to identify their enemies and they all proved to eachother who the real senior was. I was in the jungle with my friends all the while, we only got hold of the news later on.

Surprisingly, Girls were not left out. There must have been a senior student that had done you wrong in one way or the other, so they all chose that day as a day of revenge. What got everyone's attention that day and got them laughing, despite the ongoing crisis, was a certain senior student that was fighting with another junior student.

It got to a point that the senior was winning and the Junior felt he had no other tactics to beat him than to do the necessary. He held on tight to the senior student's scrotal sac. The senior screamed ' Yeeeeeeepa, epon Mi!!!! MO ku oooooo' translating to ' My scrotum, ohhhhhh, am dead ' . He screamed so hard every one started laughing, and he even said ' Senior, please please please ' probably forgetting he was the senior.

The moment the policemen entered into the school compound, everyone scattered in different directions, mostly towards us that were hiding in the jungle. It was then we realised this had gone beyond normalcy. We just didn't think twice. We scaled the school fence. No, we just passed through the ready made holes on the fence, and went straight into the Abesan Estate.

Senior Emeka and Oridota were eventually arrested and taken to the police station for inciting other students against one another. But the outcome of the day's revolution was that there was a breakdown in the dominion the senior students had for the rest of the session. You dared not seize my ball, you dared not ask me to buy you something at the canteen. The only set of students that we obeyed were the prefects and that also got some limits.


My story of my heart break actually happened in the University in my 300 level, when I was just 18 years old, and I will be writing about that tonight.

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Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by damiloladuke: 11:21am On Jul 11, 2015
PART 3

Getting inducted into the world of asking a lady out didn't actually start for me on a good note, as it is with most guys. There will always be this girl that you admire so much and you fantasize about her all the time, but you have no idea what to say to her. What happened in those days was that your friends that were 'bad' would do the talking on your behalf and after she had agreed to your proposal, then a meeting would be scheduled for you both and then you finalise the deal.



But what deal? What did I have in my head to say, I remember being connected to a pretty SS1 lady then when I was in SS3, Shalewa. This girl was so pretty and young like my self. And I had always admired her from afar. I decided to let Samuel know about it. Samuel was one of my friends that lived within the estate around my school. You would conclude these ones were there when their parents met eachother, they just knew everything about women at a very tender age.

Well it was definitely because of the environment they grew up in. An estate, especially a public one is where you meet people of different social class to mingle with. So you would always posses that charisma if you are disposed towards that.

The deal was sealed with Shalewa and it was my turn to round it all off. We met and before meeting her, it was just like a tsunami was taking place in my heart. My heart was beating non stop. While I was with her, we exchanged greetings and instead of just going straight to the point, I started blabbing and saying all sorts of irrelevant things.

I initially asked her why ladies loved putting on the kind of sandals she was wearing, I then asked the reason why she used lips gloss, and couldn't ladies do without rubbing pancake. Guessed she was getting bored with my JAMB questions, she asked me what I liked about her. I knew my own Don set at that moment.

Before I knew what was happening, my legs had begun to shake, my palms were so wet, you would think LAGOS state Water Corporation pipes were installed in them. I swallowed a pint of saliva, cleared my throat for up to 4 times and finally let the cat out of the bag. ' S....sssssamuel should have told you eee.....everything' I stammered .

' Yes, he did, but what do you want from me? What do you like about me? ' She was getting furious already.

' Nothing, I just like you' I replied.

' You are funny. You like nothing about me and you just like me. Do you know what you are saying at all? '

' Yes, I know what am saying, that's why I said I like you' At that moment, I was wishing we had not started it all. This was getting confusing and my 1st love in High School was just slipping away from my grip.

' Go and ask Samuel what you like about me and tell me tomorrow ' She said.

' Okay, so Samuel knows that. I responded stupidly, don't worry I will ask him and tell you tomorrow '

She just shook here head and left me there on that spot.

When I narrated the whole ordeal to my friends, they just kept laughing and insisted I never said that. That I must be joking. ' Wait Sanya, you mean you told her you would ask me, what you like about her? What village are you from dunce? ' I knew since he was not gonna tell me that, I should just forget about the girl. I felt so bad and I couldn't eat for days.

That was not the heartbreak I really want to write about, anyway. This happened with a lady I met at an event in Ilesha, Osun state. Misimi was her name, a student of FUTA then, she happened to be my first true love and as well gave me my first heart break. Was it a heart break? No, she murdered my heart, because I felt the pains for close to 4 months. Thank God, It happened when ASUU had a long strike, I would have been affected seriously academically. It was a very bad phase of my life. I thought about it before I slept most nights and the first thing that came to my mind after waking up was the misery I was passing through. It was a hell of a period.



CHECK THE FINAL SERIES ON www.wenogetjob.com

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Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Nobody: 11:22am On Jul 11, 2015
cool
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Deexxy: 11:31am On Jul 11, 2015
It got to a point that the senior was winning and the Junior felt he had no other tactics to beat him than to do the necessary. He held on tight to the senior student's scrotal sac. The senior screamed ' Yeeeeeeepa, epon Mi!!!! MO ku oooooo' translating to ' My scrotum, ohhhhhh, am dead ' . He screamed so hard every one started laughing, and he even said ' Senior, please please please ' probably forgetting he was the senior.

ROTFL!! gringringrin

Couldn't stop laughing at that OP.

Nice story. grin

7 Likes

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Nobody: 9:53pm On Jul 11, 2015
k
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by tohpahz(f): 9:54pm On Jul 11, 2015
cool.
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by donholy28(m): 9:54pm On Jul 11, 2015
Joblessness don become talent...on my way to quit my job and join u....but oh its night and I no get job....just my level of joblessness never reach critical stage like ur own

2 Likes

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Precious91(m): 9:54pm On Jul 11, 2015
kpele
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by McEwen(m): 9:56pm On Jul 11, 2015
undecided
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by lekjons(m): 9:56pm On Jul 11, 2015
Cool, U made my day!

1 Like

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Quote: 9:56pm On Jul 11, 2015
Lol-Reminds me of this extremely hilarious story I stumbled on...The awkward and funny way I met my hubby
.. http://yesreport..com/2015/07/the-awkward-and-funny-way-i-met-my-hubby.html?m=0
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by babyfaceafrica: 9:57pm On Jul 11, 2015
Sorry..just enchance ur energies in more productive things in life than ladies...when you succeed ,they will come crawling back to you

4 Likes

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by McEwen(m): 9:57pm On Jul 11, 2015
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Thebrightest(m): 9:57pm On Jul 11, 2015
OP(operator) YOU ARE JOBLESS
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by b3llo(m): 9:57pm On Jul 11, 2015
I like it, funny diary. :DI like it, funny diary.
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by skihacker(m): 9:58pm On Jul 11, 2015
Very nice write up
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Nobody: 9:59pm On Jul 11, 2015
Nice...
This will make a nice story book for primary school students.

2 Likes

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by himselfmaji(m): 10:00pm On Jul 11, 2015
I need summary pls too long to fathom. Haba
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Hitter(m): 10:00pm On Jul 11, 2015
Me read this thing?
Dairy of a jobless Nigerian youth to be read by jobless Nigerian Youths!

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Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by KELVIN086: 10:01pm On Jul 11, 2015
oga we dey wait
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by efilefun(m): 10:01pm On Jul 11, 2015
grin
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Venice789: 10:02pm On Jul 11, 2015
Konji that write up too long nah
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Nobody: 10:02pm On Jul 11, 2015
Woow This is really joblessness at its peak!!!

Buhari has failed to provide jobs for our naija teeming youths or has he started paying the 5000naira jobless allowance.

Buhari is a complete failure.

2 Likes

Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by Nobody: 10:03pm On Jul 11, 2015
Lol nice writeup ^.^
Re: My First Heart Break - Diary Of A Jobless NIGERIAN Youth by letsbet(m): 10:03pm On Jul 11, 2015
the high school story is so real and the humor is just awsome.


nice write-up.

1 Like

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