Shymm3x:


GTFOH!!!

Bradley Cooper over Ireland's own Colin Farell, the chics magnet? You lied!

What about De Niro the papi chulo?

Well that was the truth. De Niro, nah

raumdeuter:


I know this from personal experience. It has happened to me like 5 times. While younger I was closer to the rough/bad guy. I can joke and say x rated stuffs easily

There was a girl from the same school we met when I was on IT. In the same office, i would talk dirty, say nasty stuffs she would just laugh say "You are a very bad boy" but she would come around to gist and hear more. The talks got increasingly dirty and she would really find it very funny. It was when we got back to school that ppl were wondering how I could get that girl. This was a girl that would go in front of a lecture theatre of 300 students to preach regularly.

Another one during NYSC. Very born again girl NCCF deputy mama (She doesnt even put treatment in her hair) It started as a joke in the staff room. Of course everyday was I would move from one corper to the other. But after talking to her. and honestly I didnt have it in mind to even do anything with her. That was how she started following me about. Things happened between us. I would drink and even smoke while she would be clinging to me

All of them followed the same pattern, girls that I never expected would even pay me attention because I was bad/rough

All these girls had some bro that was always visiting them trying to get their attention and they would even ridicule the bro when they are gone. those bros used to fear me then and wonder what Sister Bleep was doing with me

Maybe its curiosity, having a feel of what the other side is.

KanwuliaJara:
I don't see any "female problems" here o!
ONLY DATING PROBLEMS!
If you are NOT compatible, no deal!
If 50 Cents is a "NICE, SWEET GUY" . . . . .no hope for women!
Tufiakwa!!!!
Nothing sweet or nice about "HOOD RATS"!

Kanwu but you are a more mature person talk true when you were yonger you preferred the rough guys to the calm guys

Even as I dey look you now sef, you no go get time for the calm guys or think they are too soft

Kanwu : Can a calm beta male handle you?

@shymmy3x how did you particularly come to know them bad bois and good bois on that your list.i dont suppose you met them personally.gat to be from your perception of them in the media and movies i think but please Terrence Howard should be 10 times the bad boi eadris Elba is.

Shymm3x:


Nah, based on public opinions - most chics prefer the guys on the left.

I still do not understand why people think most ladies prefer bad guys. I seem to hear it every now and then. The fact that some ladies made bad choices doesn't mean most will make that same mistake.

raumdeuter:


Kanwu but you are a more mature person talk true when you were yonger you preferred the rough guys to the calm guys

Even as I dey look you now sef, you no go get time for the calm guys or think they are too soft

Kanwu : Can a calm beta male handle you?

Being calm does not equate to being a WHIMP!
The reason I will forever prefer WHITE MEN!!!
My papa nor be RUFFIAN, so wetin I wan take RUFFIANS do?
No thanks!
I prefer gentlemen with FANTASTIC SENSE OF HUMOR, SOUND EDUCATION, SUPERB DOMESTICATED SKILLS, JOBS, GOOD BACKGROUNDS AND A LOT OF DISCIPLINE!

I don't do DRUG-ADDICTS!
You can only attract what you are. PERIOD!
Abeg, look me well again o.
I don't do "agberos"!
I don't come from such socio-economic backgrounds.

Thanks!

Missy89:


Well that was the truth. De Niro, nah

Lol. Darn! You like 'em white boys! Don't lie, is that why you posted Michael Ealy cos of his contact lenses induced blue eyes?

Defo can't fault this cos De Niro is a triple OG, and this shows you like 'em bad boys regardless of the race of men you're into.

troy20:
@shymmy3x how did you particularly come to know them bad bois and good bois on that your list.i dont suppose you met them personally.gat to be from your perception of them in the media and movies i think but please Terrence Howard should be 10 times the bad boi eadris Elba is.

Lol. You mean the same Terrence Howard that almost got slapped by Jamie Foxx, the softest nyggah in hollywood?

A lot of you think black people from the UK drink tea and crumpets cos folks speak proper English, no?

Don't mess with Idris Elba the Big Driss - he's one of the godfathers of pirate radios in the UK and he's a thorough bred. Don't let what you see in the media fool you - Big Driss is always in the bits (UK slang for hood) whenever he's in London. He's a real G.

yetseyi:


I still do not understand why people think most ladies prefer bad guys. I seem to hear it every now and then. The fact that some ladies made bad choices doesn't mean most will make that same mistake.

So is ya BF a sweet/nice guy or bad boy?

Shymm3x:


Lol. Darn! You like 'em white boys! Don't lie, is that why you posted Michael Ealy cos of his contact lenses induced blue eyes?

Defo can't fault this cos De Niro is a triple OG, and this shows you like 'em bad boys regardless of the race of men you're into.

Yes u got me
It is not a preference however.I am basically open. I really dont think the notion that girls like bad boys is correct thou. Young girls generally like someone who loves adventure, but when you are in your 30+ you will be looking for a responsible guy etc. Guys do it too. it is a human thing.

I live for the thrill but i am into nerds these days

Missy89:


Yes u got me
It is not a preference however.I am basically open. I really dont think the notion that girls like bad boys is correct thou. Young girls generally like someone who loves adventure, but when you are in your 30+ you will be looking for a responsible guy etc. Guys do it too. it is a human thing.

I live for the thrill but i am into nerds these days

Lol. I know you're guilty of the bad boy syndrome cos you love adventure.

But there are also a lot of nerdy bad boys - especially the jailbirds.

30+ don't count - most of the women in that age bracket are just looking to settle with just anything, or probably just good sex. This is more about the age bracket where settling isn't an option.

As a guy, I've never liked bad girls though. My preference has always been sweet and decent chics, who neither smile/laugh nor talk too much. Just beautiful dolls I can cuddle.

Please go and read a book or two romance novels and understand what women classify as 'bad boys'.
The movie 50 shades of gray (if you can't read) is close minus the protagonist's sexual psychological dysfunctions.

There are two types of bad boys
James bond panache vs Lil Wayne swag

God knows I'll definitely go for James Bond panache between those two types.
Lil Wayne Hiphop swag is nothing short of crude. Mostly women endeared to hiphop would want to have anything to do with such nonsense.

The classic male in romance books are millionaires/billionaires, handsome, confident and very direct.

Most men can never achieve these four feats at a time, Lmao.

Sorry guys! Most do not qualify as alpha males. Tehehehe

You should define an alpha male first. And also define a 'bad boy'. Some of their characteristics are parallel to each other, it's not even close.

Most 'bad boy's can be likened to boys with ADHD and mostly get hit upon for their spontaneity.

Shymm3x:


Lol. I know you're guilty of the bad boy syndrome cos you love adventure.

But there are also a lot of nerdy bad boys - especially the jailbirds.

30+ don't count - most of the women in that age bracket are just looking to settle with just anything, or probably just good sex. This is more about the age bracket where settling isn't an option.

As a guy, I've never liked bad girls though. My preference has always been sweet and decent chics, who neither smile/laugh nor talk too much. Just beautiful dolls I can cuddle.

Seeking adventure is different from being bad thou. There are cool adventures like hiking, camping, hunting, shooting range, exploring place etc. Not stealing , gangs, mob or anything too illegal. I dont even go to clubs. and there are online adventures too like debating on the dark web .

Being with someone is hard enough. It gets worse when there is no adventure. I dont think long term rela is for me thou. Feels like i am in chains when it is reaching 6+ months. I am used to being by myself (Boarding school since i was 8 ) and there are some things i wont get used to. I use to tell my bfs like 4 months before val that i dont celebrate it. I have weird interests

Shymm3x:

So is ya BF a sweet/nice guy or bad boy?

loool, I wont answer that question.

Missy89:

Seeking adventure is different from being bad thou. There are cool adventures like hiking, camping, hunting, shooting range, exploring place etc. Not stealing , gangs, mob or anything too illegal. I dont even go to clubs. and there are online adventures too like debating on the dark web .

Being with someone is hard enough. It gets worse when there is no adventure. I dont think long term rela is for me thou. Feels like i am in chains when it is reaching 6+ months. I am used to being by myself (Boarding school since i was and there are some things i wont get used to. I use to tell my bfs like 4 months before val that i dont celebrate it. I have weird interests

Lol. Not all thorough breds are in gangs, mob, stealing, or anything illegal - only a small fraction gets involved in things like that. It's just like gangs, only a small fraction of guys from the hood do gang activities...the overwhelming majority don't. You have got thorough breds in Uni, on Wall Street, involved in entrepreneurship, in hollywood, in sports, as professionals etc.., who're just a product of their environment. However, what makes them "bad" is their experience and how they deal with life. So a lot of them are also be into what you label as "cool adventures", while some might think they're moist and would take you on an adventure you have never experienced before.

So you're basically a loner, no? Effing weirdo! You definitely need to push yourself and force a long relationship with just any guy for the sake of it, just to get used to being with someone for a long time. I used to get bored of people so easily as well. The max I used to stay with chics was a month or two. Then I just decided to try a long term one in my first year in Uni and forced myself to hang in there for like two years. We became great friends after that and we're still very close. That kind of built the foundation for the next long term one that also lasted for two years. Though I've been running around since then, enjoying flings with no strings attached, while focusing on my life - I know I can be in a long term relationship if and when I want to and the time is right. It's basically a subconscious thing and, preparing ya mind for it, by experimenting.

yetseyi:



loool, I wont answer that question.

Oh, my Ijebu sister is shy.

Shymm3x:

Oh, my Ijebu sister is shy.

Looool maybe, maybe not.

I wasn't expecting the women to admit it.

It's more latent than obvious and majorly genetic as the case maybe because that's just how they are wired!

Which woman here would like to marry a virgin man? I doubt 99.99% would. So what are all the defenses for?

Personally, in my early dating life, I was abused and misused, because I WAS the nice guy, the very predictable being. They didn't like it that way... UNTIL I change. Now a woman can hardly predict me and I have mastered how to be in control of my emotions.

However, I know deep down that I am sweet, nice and dead drop romantic. But I resolve that ONLY the one who truly deserve it will EVER see that part of me and it come at a price... A price of her truth worth. Otherwise, I would be so invinsible.

freecocoa:
Yet you guys somehow managed to proclaim the guys with good character, betas, or can't an alpha male be a nice guy?

Not all alphas are bad. They can have good characters but what makes him alpha is that his goodness, so to speak, is all wrapped in a distinct masculine package. He is his own mental point of origin especially when dealing with women. This should be the ideal that all men should strive for.

In the same light not all betas or nice guys are good people. In fact it may well be that the things that makes a beta who he is is one type of insecurity or the other. The nice guy unlike the alpha is always supplicating to and placating the women in his life. He thinks that his desire to please the woman by doing all those nice things will be rewarded with her intimacy or sex.

Stillfire:
Please go and read a book or two romance novels and understand what women classify as 'bad boys'.
The movie 50 shades of gray (if you can't read) is close minus the protagonist's sexual psychological dysfunctions.

There are two types of bad boys
James bond panache vs Lil Wayne swag

God knows I'll definitely go for James Bond panache between those two types.
Lil Wayne Hiphop swag is nothing short of crude. Mostly women endeared to hiphop would want to have anything to do with such nonsense.

The classic male in romance books are millionaires/billionaires, handsome, confident and very direct.

Most men can never achieve these four feats at a time, Lmao.

Sorry guys! Most do not qualify as alpha males. Tehehehe

True that!

What women find instrinsically attractive, the alphas are in short supply. Society is full of more betas than alphas - and this is where the wahala starts; women would love to marry or settle down with the alphas but since they are not enough to go round many end up with betas. The relationships they enter into are eventually filled with resentments and unhappiness as the women constantly yet unconsciously subject their betas to tests (which he fails) in the hopes that he might alpha up. If it is a marriage the woman will start entertaining thoughts of bailing, or propose an open marriage, all so that her 'alpha needs' can be met.

In all this we see again that the nice guys aka betas, always come last.

yetseyi:


Looool maybe, maybe not.

Looool. You need to let a sweet/nice guy in cos it seems they're losing.

Bad boys can't be picking all the good girls.

ApexTitan:


Not all alphas are bad. They can have good characters but what makes him alpha is that his goodness, so to speak, is all wrapped in a distinct masculine package. He is his own mental point of origin especially when dealing with women. This should be the ideal that all men should strive for.

In the same light not all betas or nice guys are good people. In fact it may well be that the things that makes a beta who he is is one type of insecurity or the other. The nice guy unlike the alpha is always supplicating to and placating the women in his life. He thinks that his desire to please the woman by doing all those nice things will be rewarded with her intimacy or sex.

Seriously dude, what kinda women you's been hangin' with?

So in your own definition, women want to roll with a good or bad alpha but settle for betas?(as defined by you) If there are good alphas, why not stick with them? Or are you substituting a wimp for a nice guy?

2sex:
I wasn't expecting the women to admit it.

It's more latent than obvious and majorly genetic as the case maybe because that's just how they are wired!

Which woman here would like to marry a virgin man? I doubt 99.99% would. So what are all the defenses for?

Personally, in my early dating life, I was abused and misused, because I WAS the nice guy, the very predictable being. They didn't like it that way... UNTIL I change. Now a woman can hardly predict me and I have mastered how to be in control of my emotions.

However, I know deep down that I am sweet, nice and dead drop romantic. But I resolve that ONLY the one who truly deserve it will EVER see that part of me and it come at a price... A price of her truth worth. Otherwise, I would be so invinsible.

You know you are my guy, but dude get over it already, she didn't like you back, so? It's not because of your niceness as claimed, she was just one wrong girl, depending on how you define 'nice' btw.

Darn! Muthaphuckin Chris Webber from Detroit of the Fab 5 and one of the biggest villains to ever play in the NBA. Hated so much, a lot of folks still hate him even after retirement. Also a part-time rapper and music producer (yes, he produced the "Surviving the Times" record Nas' greatest hits album) bagged Tyra Banks when she was on top of her game. Just watch how ol'girl was in love in this pic!

Gun totting Swiss Beatz from the Bronx with two baby mums and Ivy League Uni educated Alicia Keys.

freecocoa:
Seriously dude, what kinda women you's been hangin' with?

So in your own definition, women want to roll with a good or bad alpha but settle for betas?(as defined by you) If there are good alphas, why not stick with them? Or are you substituting a wimp for a nice guy?

Hehehe

Isn't it obvious from the comments on this thread alone that women will pick the alphas first and foremost? The attraction that he exerts on the woman is non-negotiated it is in fact a natural response to his overt and pronounced masculinity.

As long a woman perceives a man as alpha he will get top priority in her mate selection decisions.

Women settle for the betas because as I said earlier the alphas are in short supply and in many cases where he is the bad boy type, doesn't have any long term interest in the woman.

Oh and yes betas/nice guys tend to be wimps, all their placating behaviour usually leaves them in the friendzone.

freecocoa:
You know you are my guy, but dude get over it already, she didn't like you back, so? It's not because of your niceness as claimed, she was just one wrong girl, depending on how you define 'nice' btw.

lol... I know but I had a handful of sad experiences, I wasn't talking about one person in my OP. But that's just in the past.

Dem no tell me before I change gear... I don't remember the last time I felt bad. It's been good good good good.

Play by the rules... That's what I did.

Shymm3x:


Looool. You need to let a sweet/nice guy in cos it seems they're losing.

Bad boys can't be picking all the good girls.

Loool oooo , I didn't want to derail the thread that's the reason I evaded that question. I wont even go near a "bad guy" and besides my definition of a bad guy is a bit strange ooo. Let's say my orientation is a bit different (you know that already joor).

2sex:
I wasn't expecting the women to admit it.

It's more latent than obvious and majorly genetic as the case maybe because that's just how they are wired!

Which woman here would like to marry a virgin man? I doubt 99.99% would. So what are all the defenses for?

Personally, in my early dating life, I was abused and misused, because I WAS the nice guy, the very predictable being. They didn't like it that way... UNTIL I change. Now a woman can hardly predict me and I have mastered how to be in control of my emotions.

However, I know deep down that I am sweet, nice and dead drop romantic. But I resolve that ONLY the one who truly deserve it will EVER see that part of me and it come at a price... A price of her truth worth. Otherwise, I would be so invinsible.

You expect that ladies should admit that they prefer bad guys, I really do not understand where our Nairaland brothers see these kind of ladies


I do not agree that's how ladies are wired.

I would like to marry a virgin man and I know a lot of ladies who have done that and those would still love to soooo your 99.99 stats is very very flawed.

You were not abused because you were the nice guy you were simply with the wrong person. I have said this before and I will say it again Some Guys too also get attracted to the "bad ladies" They almost never go for the good ladies who will appreciate their niceness, should I also say its genetic.


The major problem here is you most likely would have scared the good lady with your not-nice attitude and by the time you realize she's worth your real sweet self she would have gone. You better become visible if you. want to get a lady that will appreciate that mr nice guy in you.

TV01:
In as much as it is tue, it has limits and is contextual.

That is "polarity", same principle as male/female - there is an outcome for both, vis energy or life.

Again, limits and context. I don't have a womb ! But I ain't gettin; with no plain jane on acount of the fact that I'm foine !


I explained in my first response to you. People who are cultured/mature/schooled enough to choose with understanding and act wisely are freed from such laws.

Knowledge tells me fornication is bad, understanding gives me insight as to why, and wisdom enables me to choose/act appropriately. Control of - or better still elimination of - a carnal response to my base desires means I am elevated above such laws.

I do it by faith and grace - which I believe has implications and benefits beyond the here and now, but there are other ways to attain to this state.

I used to appraise women "carnally". Then I renewed my mind. Understanding flooded in. So whilst I can still appreciate the leggy girl in the pencil skirt and even be attracted to her, I act on more refined/loftier motivations.

The law is for the ungodly !


TV

I like this.

ApexTitan:


Hehehe

Isn't it obvious from the comments on this thread alone that women will pick the alphas first and foremost? The attraction that he exerts on the woman is non-negotiated it is in fact a natural response to his overt and pronounced masculinity.

As long a woman perceives a man as alpha he will get top priority in her mate selection decisions.

Women settle for the betas because as I said earlier the alphas are in short supply and in many cases where he is the bad boy type, doesn't have any long term interest in the woman.

Oh and yes betas/nice guys tend to be wimps, all their placating behaviour usually leaves them in the friendzone.

The problem here is with how you define a bad boy, an alpha male and a nice guy.

You made it sound like all alpha males are bad guys initially and that's where I disagreed.