@poster

Definitely not in nairaland

rasputinn:

Hmmm,you need to do some soul-searching to see if maybe you have been the wrong woman all along

hhahahaha maybe oo

I could say, just choose me

More seriously; what I can't understand is the swing from a guy with Masters to one without WAEC! What are you thinking girl? Christ! Whats common between your choices, looks, money or what (it does not seem to be education or intelligence)? You sound educated, so lets assume the Masters holder was a straight dope, But how do you explain the "non-WAEC" guy.

Look for something concrete in a guy and the good ones will come around.

@ topic,

to cut ur long story short, i guess u dont understand urself and ur still confused over what u really want in a guy, if hes got what u want above 60% then u can begin to build on that. otherwise dont.

Simple by being their right women

Good guys abound but they come in packages that not attractive to you.

but you need to understand that underneath these are diamond yet undiscovered.

find and read this book " wisdom for single ladies" I forgot the author but its a she.

the summary of the book is that THE MOST STABLE OF GUYS THAT WILL GIVE YOU THAT KIND OF LIVE YOU DESIRE ARE THOSE GUYS THAT LIVE A SEEMINGLY UNEVENTFUL BUT RICH LIFE. GET TO BE FRIENDS WITH THEM IST, YOU FIND THEY RESPECT YOU, CARE FOR YOU BUT WILL NOT TAKE YOU TO A PARTY. THEY LIVE WHAT YOU WILL CALL A DULL, TRIANGULAR LIFE.


I had an experience with a girl friend of mine. one night we (my cousin, she and I) ate out after which she demanded we take her to a night club. I hardly go to night clubs but my cousin do on a regular basis, my cousin supported on a strong term. after I yield, but on getting to a club i was not comfortable and i ended spoiling the night for everyone. but the whole stuff got me thinking. maybe I am getting myself into something i may not be able to cope with. well I v put some distance bwt us presently.

You see, no mr. /mrs. Right any where anymore, only God can say this is good for you, vise versal.
http://librarybookshome..com

@poster

The good guys don’t come on a platter of Gold my dear.
You need to do a self criticism and ask yourself some rare questions, do you really deserve a good guy?
Are you good yourself?
Nothing good comes easy, work on packaging yourself and your ways.

the real probs with ladies in 9ja are most are materialistic. They feel like manner falls from the sky all the time. When the right guys are standing they go for those with affluence that don't have any future with them. The ladies feel the men must do everything for them. Even while dating they request for u to paint their nails, do their hair , wash their pa$nties, pay for their family school fees, eat breakfast,lunch, dinner in the best fast food joint. They forget that all this are just short term gains. Meet a lady and for the first date ask her if she would have a cup of coffee with u, i bet u she will disgrace u right there. They want you to spend at hell. But in the western world u can woo a lady with just a cup of lipton or coffee. While i was in school u see them trooping with their drawing sheets to help do their assignment and once I'm through helping them with it they flea away. They don't want to learn, they take u as an assignment guy instead of finding ways to build something positive out of the friendship. I didn't have money to take them out so they take me like shit. Now i get a good job u see them coming like bee hives, thinking they could reap what they didn't sow. Let the wrong ladies find the wrong guys & vice versa.

it depends on the perspective u are viewing ur would be mr. right. is it on d basis of wealth,looks or luv?i can see dat u have consider the first 2 options without puting d last into consideration.
most guy flaunt their wealth to get what dey want.while moderm girls do not believe in building luv they always think there is an already made man waiting out there for them.'dem go tell u say weda na luv i won chop'

i just wanna say that i can honestly relate with how you feel. I freely admit that a lotta guys come across as stupid jerks,bt u gotta try and see things 4rm d guys point of view. Have you ever considered the possibility that these guys,like you,might have a bad opinion of women generally based on some unsavoury experiences they might've had with the fairer sex? You'd be surprised how much of a jerk a guy can be merely from habit. Sometimes we're that way because some women lead us to believe that they(and their kind in general)expect nothing more from us. Several women,desperate women take so much crap from us guys(in their desperation)that we are led to believe that they,and other women,will settle for our crappy behavior. So it's rily a case of what u give is what you get.

when you stop being the wrong woman, then you'll stop choosing the wrong men.

the day u choose me then and only then will u stop choosin wrong guys

take ur time, gal, shine ur eyez Oooo

My sister,
Women have this thing in them to give guys second, third, fourth. . . . . . tenth chances. Usually it doesnt take a woman long to know that a man wont make a good provider/ head of household. Its not about how much he has. The potential is all he needs to possess. The guys you described sound like people I know.I know their type. They cannot change. You could hustle your butt off for years and years and they would still be on the same spot where you left them still whining away pathetically. To your question on how to avoid guys like them. Its simple. Usually by the second date you can tell. All you hear is how they hate their jobs, how every one else is moving ahead by bribery and sexual favors. They'll try to obtain a quick buck from whomever will give it. They will never be positive but will constantly tell you how unlucky they have been. The complaining does not end. The one thing they will not do is set their shoulders to the plough and work!!!! When you run into that type of man beat a hasty retreat and run in the opposite direction for your life. I mean that because if you get with them they will suck the very life out of you! And nothing is worse than a woman who becomes bitter because of bad experiences with men.

I don't think we should be telling you how to stop going for the wrong men.
Sorry.
Every woman on this thread has their own idea of mr right.

My right, your wrong. So the person to ask? Look in the mirror and you'll know who.

there are none of us good men left! the price of petrol has changed all that!!!!!!

I wish I had the perfect answer sister. God's time is the best.

to get d right guy, make sure are d right lol

George_D:

when you stop being the wrong woman, then you'll stop choosing the wrong men.

i quite agree,

@poster: there's nothing such as mr right, u r responsible 4 d kind dat come into ur life. i think u know wat u want but u still need 2 work on urself(know who u r n also make urself a better partner instead), never settle 4 less, dont rush into r/s, analyse ur past r/s n make frnds(wit no strings attached) wit more guys 2 help u know em better,

@poster

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, you can never be more perfect than you are right now, you just need to be more patient because the right guy will definitely come along soon like the saying goes "you will kiss a lot of frogs before you finally meet the prince" a lot of guys out there are frogs, just be patient and you will definitely meet the prince sooner or later that will take you for who you are whether good or bad.

young lady i can feel and imagine wat u ar going tru in the hands of ,
just get closer to God and am sure the right one will come at the right time bt very soon.

Life seem to be unfair some times. See good, ready guys searching, complaining that they are not able to find a match. You see ladies complain of the same. Why cant their paths meet? What is happening??

You cant leave the job of finding your soulmate to God. "He who FINDS wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord" For men, find her! For ladies, make yourself available! Get connected and seek His approval. The problem is where??

The vacuum/void could be very crushing

I hope you didn't realise that too late. There are still young and upcoming good men here. You know what I mean? _{There is a vacancy here.}

@ poster and other Ladies

The bitter truth of the matta is that Nigerian ladies are too materialistic in nature. When u move closer to them, you will discover they meant opposite what they claim to be. I called them pretenders. The facts remain that there are many serious guys outside there looking for whom to settle down with.

I believe what a lady should look for in a guy is his view of life, his vision, character and so on. But on the other side, what they look for is a ready made man who already has serious relationship and after "used and dump" the crucification begins.

To put it straight, what exactly are ladies want in a relationship? Fun or seriousness? I advised you get your priorities right or else, you will be having the same story in different version!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not saying guys are saints, but Ladies, check yourself very well

sir t:

@ poster and other Ladies

The bitter truth of the matta is that Nigerian ladies are too materialistic in nature. When u move closer to them, you will discover they meant opposite what they claim to be. I called them pretenders. The facts remain that there are many serious guys outside there looking for whom to settle down with.

I believe what a lady should look for in a guy is his view of life, his vision, character and so on. But on the other side, what they look for is a ready made man who already has serious relationship and after "used and dump" the crucification begins.

To put it straight, what exactly are ladies want in a relationship? Fun or seriousness? I advised you get your priorities right or else, you will be having the same story in different version!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not saying guys are saints, but Ladies, check yourself very well

WHO SEND YOU?

@ JJYOU,

How does this affects you?

FL Gators:

I don't think we should be telling you how to stop going for the wrong men.
Sorry.
Every woman on this thread has their own idea of mr right.

My right, your wrong. So the person to ask? Look in the mirror and you'll know who.

Thank you jare!!

That is why we all have our 'own standards', and when a man/woman fulfills your standards and/or requirements, it makes them 'right enough' for you.

1. understand your self first.
2.know what you want in a man
3.choose a guy with same value system as yours

My sister
I am asking myself that question cause I always love the wrong ones. I think we women, we always hope that he's going to change and at the end he doesn't.

I guess if you see at the beginning of the relationship the things that you really don't like about him or you're not comfortable being with him just end the relationship cause sometimes you have to be selfish just for your happiness.

Gud luck girl

Just as you can't give what you don't have, you can't have what you don't give.

my dear,same question has been asked time without numbers,is a of patience and defining your terms.equaly dont loose focus on what you want.