About Women Making The First Move. - Romance (6)

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Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Laveda(f): 6:06pm On Jan 02, 2016

naijaboiy:

Of course you'll move on! That's the only reasonable thing you can do about it.

Guys get rejected everyday by girls and they move on. You don't hear them telling her to go and hang herself or become insultive towards her. The ones who have tried to do such things have always been derided and tongue lashed by their fellow guys Coz it's a childish thing to do.

Therefore,I don't seem to get why you all are sounding bitter,telling a guy to go hang himself simply because he didn't notice your green light. The same way you girls have the choice to turn a guy down is the same way a guy has the right not to make a move whether you show him your green light or not.

It doesn't make him any less of a man.

Calm down...
"He should go hang himself" " He's dumb"
We aren't generalising ..just referring to the guys we admire not you..so calm your balls

I don't mind doing it..its actually nothing...but the way you guys reason things now..I can't.. Some good guys can say No..while some would take advantage of me simply because I said my mind..so you see it isn't really our fault..maybe the guys needs to loosen up a bit....

We're sometimes scared of rejection.. And that's cause we are ladies....

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by naijaboiy: 6:06pm On Jan 02, 2016

iyerenath:
u r a very big fool of d highest order for saying dat....pls just tell us d difference between pride n arrogance or get lost if u don't wanna...what an olosho!!!

Is this one okay?

Oliviaarims it's best you ignore.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by emperorchedda(m): 6:06pm On Jan 02, 2016

Kachisbarbie:

My dear, avoid quoting me. I don't care if I make any sense to you or your ilk.
Thanks.

You're very welcome

I had to quote you to encourage you to keep making sense, so rest your head and run along ok??

Once again, you're welcome kiss

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by tosyne2much(m): 6:08pm On Jan 02, 2016

Oliviaarims

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by jelal007(m): 6:08pm On Jan 02, 2016

Diddyydiva:
Why should I approach a guy?
Am I mad?

ERM.......
lemme practice ............
Me: hi Ray Ray: hi dear friend Me: ( silence). Ray am I still a friend to u? Ray: Yes you are hun . my very good friend. Me: hmmmmmmmmm but I ...... I......... Ray: what's it diddy ? Me: I want more of you Ray: ( speechless). Bae na sinach sing am Me: ( force a hard laugh) You. caught me there

Mtcheeeeeewwww

I can't do it.
There are other ways to go after what you want without being direct.

it works for some people tho but the chances are slim .

Manners.....patience......modesty. Ewww

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Toks2008(m): 6:09pm On Jan 02, 2016

wristbangle:

Exactly sir but what if the guy fails to acknowledge her greenlight?

Then the guy no smart.

A lady asking a man for time can be a green light.

A lady asking a guy the time of lecture can be a green light even a lady asking a guy a question in the bus can be a green light and so on.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by ronald4lif(m): 6:09pm On Jan 02, 2016

simplisity:
This is not a matter of calling u an old fashioned. It is very unnatural and uncultural for a woman to woo a man.

Speak for yourself and the class of women you have in your circle. What do you people think or assume culture to be? Culture is metamorphosic and evolves with time. If you think a woman shouldn't woo you just like you can woo them you're tacitly admitting you're not endearing and lovable even as its a confession of low self esteem.

This is referring to Toks2008 submission as well.

6 Likes 3 Shares

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by tonyx4x44(m): 6:10pm On Jan 02, 2016

naijaboiy:

Of course you'll move on! That's the only reasonable thing you can do about it.

Guys get rejected everyday by girls and they move on. You don't hear them telling her to go and hang herself or become insultive towards her. The ones who have tried to do such things have always been derided and tongue lashed by their fellow guys Coz it's a childish thing to do.

Therefore,I don't seem to get why you all are sounding bitter,telling a guy to go hang himself simply because he didn't notice your green light. The same way you girls have the choice to turn a guy down is the same way a guy has the right not to make a move whether you show him your green light or not.

It doesn't make him any less of a man.

Gospel!

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by doskie(m): 6:11pm On Jan 02, 2016

Estharfabian:
Truth be told...

I'd never ask A guy Out!! even if my life depended on it! how degrading!! My ego won't even let me...

I'd keep giving him signs(Green, blue and yellow lights), I'd talk sweet to him, Change my voice around him, be all touchy n mushy towards him, Act overly caring, maybe call him like TWICE A month?...if he still doesn't get those Obvious/vivid Romantic signs.

He should go hang himself for all I care!!! fûck him!

Dating isn't my priority...There are plenny "Sharks" in the sea...I only have to choose from so many.....!

we are no longer in that era. the world has moved on. saying fucck off to a guy now only applies to fake men. trust me; after saying he should Bleep off, you will still be looking at him from your window, checking his instagram, and hating your female friend who collected his number from you, pinged him, dated him, married him and bore him kids. dont try to act tough. you are inherently designed not to be as strong as you want to make us believe.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nicepoker(m): 6:12pm On Jan 02, 2016

Ladies stop flashing useless green light. If a guy turn ur proposal down don't feel dejected. Cos it happens to us also.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nicepoker(m): 6:12pm On Jan 02, 2016

Ladies stop flashing useless green light. If a guy turn ur proposal down don't feel dejected. Cos it happens to us also..

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by erico2k2(m): 6:15pm On Jan 02, 2016

Estharfabian:
Truth be told...

I'd never ask A guy Out!! even if my life depended on it! how degrading!! My ego won't even let me...

I'd keep giving him signs(Green, blue and yellow lights), I'd talk sweet to him, Change my voice around him, be all touchy n mushy towards him, Act overly caring, maybe call him like TWICE A month?...if he still doesn't get those Obvious/vivid Romantic signs.

He should go hang himself for all I care!!! fûck him!

Dating isn't my priority...There are plenny "Sharks" in the sea...I only have to choose from so many.....!

That's what guys term the first move. U do t need to physically ask him out. All that you just said would make him take U on a date. Of he can't see the light your flinging at him then he is colour blind ie not good.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by daveP(m): 6:15pm On Jan 02, 2016

Another Beyonce ft R Kelly If i were a boy remix discussion!

Greeen, abi Violet light isnt enough these days.

And our counterparts on other continents are doing this and its working for them. Why cant they?

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by naijaboiy: 6:16pm On Jan 02, 2016

Laveda:
Calm down...
"He should go hang himself" " He's dumb"
We aren't generalising ..just referring to the guys we admire not you..so calm your balls

I don't mind doing it..its actually nothing...but the way you guys reason things now..I can't.. Some good guys can say No..while some would take advantage of me simply because I said my mind..so you see it isn't really our fault..maybe the guys needs to loosen up a bit....

We're sometimes scared of rejection.. And that's cause we are ladies....

[b]i'm calm and I know I'm not the one being referred to. However I'm speaking on a guy's point of view.

Personally I don't care how i get to meet a girl,whether she made the first move or I did doesn't matter as long as I also have the hots for her.

Now majority of you said you can't ask a guy out. I have no problem with that as everyone has what they can do and not do and no one should criticise them for it. But on the issue of showing green light,I'll reiterate that a guy not making a move after seeing your green light doesn't make him less of a man.

The statement you and Esthar made was like "if I show a guy green light then by all means he has to woo me". It is not compulsory and doesn't work that way.

Furthermore, you stated that girls can't handle rejection and that's the more reason why should not ask a guy out. No problem. But nobody likes rejection at all,not even we guys that encounter it almost every day of our lives.

So not being able to handle rejection is not an excuse for anyone to be bitter about the out come. Be you a male or female.

If a guy asks a girl out and he's rejected then by all means he should forget about her and move on. Same goes for the girls....if you ask a guy out or better still, show him the green light and he doesn't make a move you should also move on. It's not something to be bitter about.

Showing green lights is not a guarantee that the guy will ask you out.[/b]

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by wristbangle: 6:17pm On Jan 02, 2016

tonyx4x44:

Leave the mumu group of girls... They are shouting the are saying fucck him etc

They can't stand being rejected but the expect guys to see it as fun

I hate it when ladies form James Bond to enjoy the fun of guys been rejected. Meanwhile they hate it most. They should know how it feels to be rejected na.

2 Likes

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by wristbangle: 6:18pm On Jan 02, 2016

Toks2008:

Then the guy no smart.

A lady asking a man for time can be a green light.

A lady asking a guy the time of lecture can be a green light even a lady asking a guy a question in the bus can be a green light and so on.

On point sir

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by kinglekan: 6:18pm On Jan 02, 2016

tosyne2much:
Oliviaarims

Why u dey disturb am?

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by emperorchedda(m): 6:19pm On Jan 02, 2016

Laveda:
Calm down...
"He should go hang himself" " He's dumb"
We aren't generalising ..just referring to the guys we admire not you..so calm your balls

I don't mind doing it..its actually nothing...but the way you guys reason things now..I can't.. Some good guys can say No..while some would take advantage of me simply because I said my mind..so you see it isn't really our fault..maybe the guys needs to loosen up a bit....

We're sometimes scared of rejection.. And that's cause we are ladies....

lol

So men are the ones built to take rejection??. Please you all should stop this mentality.

2 Likes

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Toks2008(m): 6:19pm On Jan 02, 2016

ronald4lif:

Speak for yourself and the class of women you have in your circle. What do you people think or assume culture to be? Culture is metamorphosic and evolves with time. If you think a woman shouldn't woo you just like you can woo them you're tacitly admitting you're not endearing and lovable even as its a confession of low self esteem.

This is referring to Toks2008 submission as well.

My submission is simple...dont woo a man head on..show subtle signals i tagg green light.

even on nairaland a lady can show a green light by just quoting a guy and she could lash out at u and that can be a green light.

see ladies should wake up..real men no longer have time for this shit called wooing and these guys will just easily fall for any smart chic.

So ladies should continue forming levels,i trust the wobey guys to be on your neck and while you are feeling cool that a guy is persistently chasing you,the guy is simply doing wat he naturally knows how to do best and that is hunting you down no matter how long and how hard and once he gets u,he marks his register n move on...

Real responsible men will harly persist on winning a lady cos na even by Gods grace for them to woo you in the first place..quote me anywhere.

5 Likes

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by kinglekan: 6:20pm On Jan 02, 2016

wristbangle:

I hate it when ladies form James Bond to enjoy the fun of guys been rejected. Meanwhile they hate it most. They should know how it feels to be rejected na.

Padi mi JE KAN MO!!!

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by boookworm: 6:20pm On Jan 02, 2016

Kachisbarbie:
Some ladies expect guys to know when they are in the mood to be wooed, if they are his level or not... like he is psychic _ yet they can't do same.
Guys get turned down everyday, and they are not dead.

You don't go about approaching every random guy, those signs you expect a young man to watch out for, you should be smart enough to watch out for same signs.

Observing a guy closely (especially when you guys have established a reasonable degree of familiarity), you would notice if he is into you but has issues expressing himself probably for fear of being turned down too. That's the time to strike...

Girl, u are really smart

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Camellia(f): 6:20pm On Jan 02, 2016

I did it...tho it wasn't wooing per say... I just told d dude dat I had dis crush on him..... I lived!....it helped me get over d crush faster... It made me bold...
And if d dude tried as a much as behave somehow to me..I put him in his place..

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nobody: 6:20pm On Jan 02, 2016

doskie:
I totally disagree with you. infact im not one to call people out or mention them but your little write up is so wrong in my view that I feel an impulse to counter it immediately in the same spirit I read it.
1. your analogy is too left- filled. you talked passively about a girl who made the first move. you did not describe the scenerio properly enough to point out her overt stupidity maybe in the way she spoke or who was with the person she spoke to. in any case, should the existence of car accidents make us all travel on foot?
2. what law precisely states that toasting is a male thing? we as humans feel attracted to the opposite gender. should a lady die with her feelings just because she's a woman? how come it that she is free to pursue a career, but she is bound from relieving a natural impulse to feel attracted and want a particular person? its a warped way of reasoning especially when a fellow girl makes the move that secures her the man you are desperately loving from your window
and behind solid walls built by an imaginary social environment.
3. except your reasons are for the fact that girls will cease any opportunity to chase after rich boys precisely. well because their idea of love is material, I will say you are

guilty of hasty generalisation and employment of a blanket statement when you wrote that boys will disrespect the lady who makes the first move. please try looking at life with a wider compass. everything does not happen in your backyard. there are many successful marriages where the lady moved first.

Allow me clarify things here. First, the example I mentioned about the case I witnessed is no standard. It wasn't meant to be the basis for which girls should avoid wooing a man. I cited the example because it was what made me create the thread.

Secondly, it doesn't have to be written down in some law book that men should be the one doing the toasting. There are so many unwritten codes and conventions governing the way humans should live. And my view on the topic that women should leave the wooing for the men stems from what is observable in our society. We are Africans and such a practice is not totally acceptable;it is in lieu of this that I advise ladies to exercise a little restraint. Also, I haven't said it's in all cases that the lady will meet with a rebuff or end or end up in a futile relationship.

If u read the comments on the first page, I agreed that there are some situations in which it is permissible.

And NO, I'm not in any way guilty of Hasty generalisation. Go back to the topic and u'll see that I did not categorically say she would be disrespected. I didn't even use the word "disrespect." I simply said the chances are high of him not taking the lady seriously in the relationship . It means there are exceptions- a possibility of this not happening.

I try to be as open-minded as possible, but for now, I think I'd prefer to stick to the status quo. There isn't much sense in fighting everything all in the name of being liberal.

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nobody: 6:20pm On Jan 02, 2016

[quote author=kinglekan post=41588485][/quote]

BRO,why are you Quoting me without any Advice??.You need to visit YABA LEFT

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by zanga420: 6:22pm On Jan 02, 2016

@ Oliviaarims
Thank God, u've seen its not easy to woo a person. I doubt if ur girl did it d right way. Same way, if a guy woo a lady wrongly, he receives insults n backlash. Guys also learn d swags of wooing a lady.
I've seen girls that made d first move n their relationships were strong with mutual respect. So let ur girl learn d diplomacy of making d 1st move n u'll see how cute that is.
U said u were old fashioned? Oh we're in new fashion now(21st century), so learn.

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Oahray: 6:23pm On Jan 02, 2016

Diddyydiva:
Why should I approach a guy?

Am I mad?

ERM.......

lemme practice ............

Me: hi Ray
Ray: hi dear friend
Me: ( silence). Ray am I still a friend to u?
Ray: Yes you are hun . my very good friend.
Me: hmmmmmmmmm but I ...... I.........
Ray: what's it diddy ?
Me: I want more of you
Ray: ( speechless). Bae na sinach sing am
Me: ( force a hard laugh) You. caught me there

Mtcheeeeeewwww

I can't do it.

There are other ways to go after what you want without being direct.

it works for some people tho but the chances are slim .

Ray? Seriously? Use another name biko undecided

@op, I wonder why you ladies dread rejection like this. Yet una dey dish am out in generous dosage. Rejection has never killed anybody, male or female.

1 Like

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nobody: 6:23pm On Jan 02, 2016

OP nd Diddy u guys made me laff serious.. So Dija boobs done dey trend nw.. N the gal tell the guy i want more of you..na sinach? Lmao

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by tosyne2much(m): 6:24pm On Jan 02, 2016

As a guy, I just can't imagine myself wooing a lady. The highest I can do, is show her greenlight and If she can't woo me, she should go hang herself for all I care!!

*nobody should quote*

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Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nobody: 6:25pm On Jan 02, 2016

Toks2008:

Then the guy no smart.

A lady asking a man for time can be a green light.

A lady asking a guy the time of lecture can be a green light even a lady asking a guy a question in the bus can be a green light and so on.

Brus you no TRY.So a LADY asking a guy for anything now is a GREEN LIGHT ABI?. Your stupidity stinks to the High Heavens

2 Likes

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by zanga420: 6:26pm On Jan 02, 2016

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by doskie(m): 6:26pm On Jan 02, 2016

Kachisbarbie:
Some ladies expect guys to know when they are in the mood to be wooed, if they are his level or not... like he is psychic _ yet they can't do same.
Guys get turned down everyday, and they are not dead.

You don't go about approaching every random guy, those signs you expect a young man to watch out for, you should be smart enough to watch out for same signs.

Observing a guy closely (especially when you guys have established a reasonable degree of familiarity), you would notice if he is into you but has issues expressing himself probably for fear of being turned down too. That's the time to strike...

this is just my type of girl. you are a leader!
I am particularly on a new level with relating with girls. in my new environment, I did not talk or greet any girl first. I noticed those who out of pride kept ignoring me like they didnt notice I just moved in. I also observed those who at least smiled and greeted. they are more mature and civilised in my view. I am great friends with them today much to the disappointment and jealousy of the the proud ones. this is not relationship. this is just common neighbourliness and friendship. some ladies are so proud and paranoid that they think anybody connecting with them is actually trying to get into their pannts. they have no social intelligence. they become an unnecessary audience. in a position to help one of them with a job that would have been so easy for her because the owner of the company is a friend, I rather watch her wallow in her pride.

5 Likes

Re: About Women Making The First Move. by Nobody: 6:26pm On Jan 02, 2016

Estharfabian:
Truth be told...

I'd never ask A guy Out!! even if my life depended on it! how degrading!! My ego won't even let me...

I'd keep giving him signs(Green, blue and yellow lights), I'd talk sweet to him, Change my voice around him, be all touchy n mushy towards him, Act overly caring, maybe call him like TWICE A month?...if he still doesn't get those Obvious/vivid Romantic signs.

He should go hang himself for all I care!!! fûck him!

Dating isn't my priority...There are plenny "Sharks" in the sea...I only have to choose from so many.....!

shuuuu

Plenty irresponsible shark i see. If you see a good husband material, it's better you don' let him. Husband scarce dese days. No be play talk oo. Many just want to have a taste of the punny midst sweet talks from their sugarcoated mouth. Very few just want to be serious. expecially in this our generation. so, forget that mentality ooo. Even as a guy, i can tell you, out of every 100 ladies i might see in a day, maybe 5 might just be the real wife material.

1 Like

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