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Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones - Romance - Nairaland

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Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:22pm On Jan 08, 2016
Many a time i encounter a beast of a family member, a lover or a spouse. They are quarrelsome at home with their loved ones, the pick offence at things their loved ones do to them but if they were in a public place such as their place of work, you see thrm tolerating the same offences from strangers. I wonder why the human mind operates in this way, technically upside down, this mode of reasoning is the same the e fighters here exhibit, most of them are cowards in person or even loveable people, yet they are violent to their online family.
I have a female cousin who terrorises her family, she keeps malice often, quick to pick a fight eith anybody at slightest provocation, the period i visited her at her place of work, my jaw dropped at thr angel i met there, she was so nice and i didnt see her fight as usual (though she fights regulary with her coworkers in the shared office space since the arrangement mimics a family gathering), i therefore surmise the idiocy in humans when they behave like that.
I am an idiot too based on my premise, very recently i realised i find it easier to forgive the transgressions of my female friends who mean nothing to me, but the moment bae does the exact same thing all hell will let loose, i will be screaming and panting like a wrestler without realising this woman means the world to me. This behaviour of mine is why marriages and relationships of today never last, we find it easier to cut people who mean nothing to us some slack but find it difficult to tolerate same in the person we love.
I was a terror as a child to my family and a meek watered down mouse outside my home, one day i changed . Today i am a meek watered down mouse in my home with my family and rather could be a terror outside to other people. I believe this is the order our preferences should be. The decorum we show outside in places rhat demand such behaviour , cant we maintain such decorum in our homes with loved ones, cant we be equally patient , trusting , excusing and forgiving ?
I REALLY PRAY HUMANS GET THEIR PRIORTY OF LOVE RIGHT AND STOP EMPHASIS ON THE WHEN THE GOING IS GOOD ROMANTIC LOVE.
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Nobody: 1:26pm On Jan 08, 2016
Story for the gods undecided
summary of wat u wrote is wat will call
Medicine after death
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Nobody: 1:26pm On Jan 08, 2016
Bed time Story for the gods undecided
summary of wat u wrote is wat will call
Medicine after death
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by BeeBeeOoh(m): 1:30pm On Jan 08, 2016
Too much familiarity is the cause..
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by MzPecs(f): 1:30pm On Jan 08, 2016
You right about that OP.
Many times, I get angry at any slightest thing my older sis does buh a stranger will do the same thing to and i'll just smile and ignore. Very strange

Truth is when we get used to that stranger, story will definitely change.

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by MzPecs(f): 1:32pm On Jan 08, 2016
BeeBeeOoh:
Too much familiarity is the cause..
True that..

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by iceberylin(m): 1:32pm On Jan 08, 2016
When u give less fu ck about people they hardly hurt you...
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:33pm On Jan 08, 2016
sickstars:
Bed time Story for the gods undecided
summary of wat u wrote is wat will call
Medicine after death
this man could be a lovable person in reality, but because we are an online family to be nice dey hard am
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:34pm On Jan 08, 2016
MzPecs:
You right about that OP.
Many times, I get angry at any slightest thing my older sis does buh a stranger will do the same thing to and i'll just smile and ignore. Very strange

Truth is when we get used to that stranger, story will definitely change.
true with familiarity but fact is that its very wrong, i have never seen a person weep profusely at the burial of a stranger but they do that even to their most hated family member
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Nobody: 1:34pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
this man could be a lovable person in reality, but because we are an online family to be nice dey hard am

We cares so cos of wat u wrote i shd worship d write ups abeg

No love in d hood


Done showing love m goin to make my offline attitude same with my online m at no loss by d way tongue i woke up happy the storm is over for me cheesy
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:37pm On Jan 08, 2016
iceberylin:
When u give less fu ck about people they hardly hurt you...
true, its really strange though that the people u give a damn about hurts you most, though the things they did to hurt you , you tolerated same behaviour by soneone u dont care about
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by cruzita(f): 1:37pm On Jan 08, 2016
true talk op.I'm guilty of this

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:39pm On Jan 08, 2016
sickstars:


We cares so cos of wat u wrote i shd worship d write ups abeg

No love in d hood


Done showing love m goin to make my offline attitude same with my online m at no loss by d way tongue i woke up happy the storm is over for me cheesy
we thank God whatever storm you were facing is over. Cheers
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Nobody: 1:40pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
we thank God whatever storm you were facing is over. Cheers

Abi na back to crazy me grin

Thank God o
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by ipledge10(m): 1:40pm On Jan 08, 2016
You are right Op its easier for me to get mad my sis,my crush,my best friend than anybody else...I think because it pains me more if I get the unexpected from them
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by MzPecs(f): 1:43pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
true with familiarity but fact is that its very wrong, i have never seen a person weep profusely at the burial of a stranger but they do that even to their most hated family member
The fact that I get angry at slightest thing my loved ones does, doesn't mean hatred! No..
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:46pm On Jan 08, 2016
MzPecs:

The fact that I get angry at slightest thing my loved ones does, doesn't mean hatred! No..
it doesnt mean hatred. Just abit of intolerance. Guess its a flaw most of us have, lack of tolerance for our loved ones yet we tolerate other people we dont give a shit about. I do that too. By Gods grace i will change
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:49pm On Jan 08, 2016
ipledge10:
You are right Op its easier for me to get mad my sis,my crush,my best friend than anybody else...I think because it pains me more if I get the unexpected from them

guess the issue could be explained by our dissapointment when the people we have more trust in not to hurt our feeling eventually do so,. But for a stranger we have no such expectations so we easily forgive them. Hmmmmmm.

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by poshestmina(f): 1:49pm On Jan 08, 2016
Strangers know their boundaries and don't overstep it most times too unlike Family members who feel 'they know you finish
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:52pm On Jan 08, 2016
poshestmina:
Strangers know their boundaries and don't overstep it most times too unlike Family members who feel 'they know you finish
for example dear, if you stayed with a visiting family friend and ur younger sister , then you realised a new gown you have never worn was worn by both ur sister and this family friend and left unwashed for you to deal with, who would you be more pissed off with. Your sister or the family friend
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by MzPecs(f): 1:53pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
it doesnt mean hatred. Just abit of intolerance. Guess its a flaw most of us have, lack of tolerance for our loved ones yet we tolerate other people we dont give a shit about. I do that too. By Gods grace i will change
Seriously, i've thought of that before.
...and I always feel bad about it buh it keeps repeating itself even when I try to tolerate those little things 4rm my loved ones.

By God's grace i'll change.

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by ipledge10(m): 1:54pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
guess the issue could be explained by our dissapointment when the people we have more trust in not to hurt our feeling eventually do so,. But for a stranger we have no such expectations so we easily forgive them. Hmmmmmm.
thats best explanation i can think of

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by Eddygourdo(m): 1:56pm On Jan 08, 2016
MzPecs:

Seriously, i've thought of that before.
...and I always feel bad about it buh it keeps repeating itself even when I try to tolerate those little things 4rm my loved ones.

By God's grace i'll change.
amen dear

1 Like

Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by poshestmina(f): 1:56pm On Jan 08, 2016
Oh! My sister of course. Guess it is because of the love and high expectations

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Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by frakdon(m): 3:03pm On Jan 08, 2016
Eddygourdo:
guess the issue could be explained by our disappointment when the people we have more trust in not to hurt our feeling eventually do so,. But for a stranger we have no such expectations so we easily forgive them. Hmmmmmm.
believe you me,this life, isn't an easy place to live, *and its better to live alone than to live with family members,if you can't tolerate some of their stubbornness, and may be their independent mind....
Re: Why Do We Find It Easier To Tolerate Strangers Than Loved Ones by frakdon(m): 3:05pm On Jan 08, 2016
poshestmina:
Oh! My sister of course. Guess it is because of the love and high expectations
this!

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