@Debosky

I agree with you 100%. You just represented my exact opinions and doubts about the girl. I often ask why girls are like this anyway.

@Poster
It might not be what you want to hear but I sense your girlfriend is on to some games right there. How could she have been comfortable enough to go into a legal binding with you but not down with telling you her ordeal at 17 until now? Why did she wait so long?

Why the sudden urge for sex? Where is that coming from? I think she's trying to plant something on you. I do understand you love her but she's either lying to you or trying to test your faith in her --- more so to find out if you are into her because of her virginity status but I highly doubt that because she's trying to have sex with you. It's true that some girls don't know what it is like when they are virgin or not, but come on, what's with the hidden secret? In my opinion, it's one of the fundamental things she should have told you as long as she was able to tell you she's a virgin-- that was the next thing she should have said(Just as a woman would tell a man she has a kid)

You should be able to apply some intelligence in this regards and work your way through this mess or if you can't handle the pressure have her see a gynecologist and the rest is easy but in what light will she see you if actually the doctor certifies her a virgin? What do you intend to do if she isn't certified a virgin? Let me add that "fingering" can't and will never break a virginity. My point is you'd find out why she's lying and not dwell on the sanctimonious wish that she's a virgin

Akin, UK:

I have a girl friend for five years and when we met, she told me she was a virgin. Her mother equally told me the same story that her two female children were not waywards and I believed and I told her that so I am and never known any girl up till now. We moved together for 3yrs b4 I left Naija and I kept her as I met her. Before I left Naija more than two years ago, we went privately (only the two of us) to the registry to register the wedding.

Today, she was asking me whether I want to marry her because she told me she was a virgin but I have never thought of that question because all the ladies that have have been my friends have always been virgins. The last was the one we did MSc together in UI in 2003. I have never asked any of them and neither did I tell them that I have not known any woman. The way I used to discover used to be when I attempt to act as if I wanted to make love with them and they would tell me they have never done it b4 and I tell them mine story as well.

Now this my fiancee (already registered as wife) is now telling me that she is not sure because when she was in secondary school at 17yr old, his boy friend attempted to finger her but she shouted when she felt the pain and when the guy wanted to insert her screw, she prevented him by shouting. Now she said she is feeling she is still a virgin because she did not see any blood during the incident and did not know how far the guy's finger penetrated. She came to visit me in UK and wanted us to have sex but I told her we are yet to get the Godly and moral licence from God thru church wedding which we both aim to do soon.

Can a lady be a virgin and not sure??

Ladies and gentlemen of Naira land, what do you think of her and how do you think I shud react?

nairaland! una too much i wan die of laughter, how una dey take generate this kin stories sef? long story short, she no bi virgin, but thanks for the tales by moon light story sha

When are our ladies going to put an end to their deceitful nature

From the story, it is very very clear that this lady is NOT a virgin.
First, her sudden question of whether he wanted to marry her because of her virginity is very suspicious. Why didn't she ask the question 5 years ago or better still be4 they went to registry

Secondly, y the sudden rush to UK for sex Sex she didn't want to have 2 years ago Tell me something else.

From my point of view, this girl could not hold her body and has eaten the forbidden fruit Worst still, she might be pregnant for the sharp dude and want to push the pregnancy to this innocent virgin. Daughters of Eve

@poster, you'll be better off without this deceit of a lady. In marriage open truth can not be exchanged for anything.

@Poster - Unfortunately, there is not a lot u can do, as u are already married. It is impossible to know what her motives her for telling you this story at this stage, but we can safely err on the side of caution, and say it is extremely "fishy" to say the least.
I always say, when in doubt, take the worst option - This means that you have to accept the possibility of infidelity.
Definitely do not engage in sex with her at this stage - she may be trying to tie a pregnancy to you,or evn the so called "lost" virfinity.
Be extra cautious, and vigilant like you've never been been before. Check and double check things you have never checked before. Remember - It takes a monkey to catch a monkey. If she is doing, or has done anything, there will always be signs. You do not need to see "hard" evidence to prove something has happened, all you need are the "signs".
Also, you may never be able to prove infidelity, but you can at least show her that u are not stupid, and will not be taken for a ride.
Best of luck.

i know i shouldnt laugh but ur story is very funny. chicks are soooo interesting. well ummmmmmmmmmmmm yeah im not sure what she is either. she technically might still be a virgin clinically, but spiritually she isnt.

she is funny - has she had sex and is now tryin to redefine her statement or find an experience to protect herself for when u penetrate and find out that she is 'loose'

E ya a , Oma se O

Hi all,
I ran across this thread/forum while googling something and I have to say, now I know the value of sex education.
I'm pretty sure that the creator of this topic received an answer a while ago but as I skimmed over the responses, I didn't see one correct answer (or I missed it), and so i had to create an account to reply.
SHE IS/WAS MOST DEFINITELY A VIRGIN.

One is definitely a virgin until penetration of SEXUAL ORGANS are involved.
Fingering is not loss of virginity! That would mean females who masturbate aren't virgins anymore which makes absolutely no sense. I'm sure one such as the creator of this thread have masturbated before, does that mean that person isn't a virgin anymore? Preposterous.

To my horror I've seen a response here that says that the woman was lying about her experience because she didn't want to be found out as loose when the creator did eventually have sex with her. REALLY? I couldn't believe what I was reading. Fact is, even if the woman isn't/wasn't a virgin, doing the deed once, twice, or even three times doesn't define her as "loose." This type of male chauvinistic response is disgusting.

So to sum it all up, fingering doesn't mean the loss of virginity; marriage is based on love (as others here have stated) - not on sexual experience.

some men are confused with the word VIRGIN

a virgin is a woman who has never has se.x with many man --- simple as that

whether she bleeds or not still she was still a virgin and whether she was fingered or not she is still a virgin no C.OCK has never entered her pum pum

the bleeding means its dry se.x i.e she aint relaxed it her first time so she is tense from all the stories she hears like it hurts etc

so guys who we worry about bleeding or being a virgin i.e never slept with anyone

the poster YOU GIVE SUPPORT TO YOUR WOMEN SHE WAS ALMOST RA.PED and yourself you busy worrying about being a virgin

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