agarawu23:
oga no be my mouth u go hear say police die but I will give u my own point and it's left for u to follow your mind.


Majority of guys I knew that took their wife abroad regretted it. Here on NL, we have read many cases too. I have a family member in UK that's now mentally ill when he caught his wife cheating with a foreigner. It wasn't "den say den say" he caught her pant down. (A Lady that has 3 grown up kids already)

I remember when I told my dad I want to bring my babe here with me, the next thing he said was " do u remember Mr lagbaja and Mr lagbaja's" case? A lady that loves you will wait for you.

Though some are enjoying it BUT majority are regretting it cos our ladies eyes dey open when u bring them abroad most especially when they start to move with friends.

I will advice you to come and settle with her in Nigeria than to take her there.

Though ladies aren't the same but I am talking from experience.

Cc samhay

hglmkope:
You are entitled to your opinion. If I may ask, what alternative would you give to your brother if he insists on marrying a lady that lives in Nigeria?

cho25bc:
Congratulations in advance OP
Frm ur write up, d only reason why u don't want an elaborate wedding with 500> guests is not becos u don't like huge parties bt it's becos u don't want 2 spend beyond ur financial capacity,right?
In ur write up, it seems as if u are d only one expected 2 bankroll d whole event. Let me ask u, what is d financial status of ur potential inlaws? Are they poor? What are they planning 2 contribute 2 d wedding expenses? What abt ur wife 2 be?is she jobless? Doesn't she av any intention of offsetting some of d bills too?
Is it after paying d dowry and buying all d 'eru iyawo' dat u are still expected 2 sponsor d wedding? What abt ur family,I mean ur parents? What is dier own take on dis matter?
Frm [b]what I can deduce frm u, u must be d type dat parades himself beyond his bank account size. Maybe u gave ur inlaws d impression dat u are a wealthy man capable of taking care of dier needs moneywise, probably becos u are based abroad. If dat's not d case, den why are u here panicking?
To me dis is not an issue.it is not enuf 2 freak u ou[/b]t and drag urself 2 NL. It is strictly a family affair. U, ur fiancee, ur parent and her parent shud sit down and hold a family meeting. Lay ur cards on d table. Be firm. Be transparent. Let ur parent support u. Ur babe and her family MUST also contribute 2 d budget on ground. If not, then they shud FORGET abt inviting a crowd. They can't kill u 4 bin blunt.
Let dem know ur vision of taking dier daughter wit u 2 Ogbodo Oyinbo.
Eg, let's say ur estimated budget 4 d wedding is 500k (500+ guests), bt personally ur pocket size can only boasts of 350k, let ur inlaws 2 be fetch d remaining 150k,else no elaborate wedding.
Just be a man and put ur feet on d ground. Wedding expenses,elaborate or simple,shud not be d responsibility of d man alone.it's shud be a joint venture.
As 4 hw 2 reduce d number of guests 2 200, I'll go wit those who suggested holding it on a weekday,preferrably Monday. Just pray abt it and follow God's direction.
I wish u all d best sir

sukkot:
carrying a woman from naija to wherever he at. well hopefully he is not one of these cab drivers in america who bring women from the village and then the woman gets to america and discovers he is not balling like she thinks he is and she gets angry and the marriage crumbles and is full of anger and violence and eventually divorce or one of em kills the other. happens all the time

hglmkope:
Hello! I just could not pass by without saying a word about this. What if he does not plan to live in Nigeria? Would you prefer that they both stay apart after wedding. Although there are Nigerian women who will cheat on their spouse, history also has record of those that have remained faithful despite all odds (you attest to this yourself).

At op, please only you can decide if you want her to come over there with you. You know her so well more than anyone here. Besides, I think if she is worth being your wife, then she is worth living with you wherever you are. Please don't make her wait for you. It does not always work out that way.

agarawu23:
oga no be my mouth u go hear say police die but I will give u my own point and it's left for u to follow your mind.


Majority of guys I knew that took their wife abroad regretted it. Here on NL, we have read many cases too. I have a family member in UK that's now mentally ill when he caught his wife cheating with a foreigner. It wasn't "den say den say" he caught her pant down. (A Lady that has 3 grown up kids already)

I remember when I told my dad I want to bring my babe here with me, the next thing he said was " do u remember Mr lagbaja and Mr lagbaja's" case? A lady that loves you will wait for you.

Though some are enjoying it BUT majority are regretting it cos our ladies eyes dey open when u bring them abroad most especially when they start to move with friends.

I will advice you to come and settle with her in Nigeria than to take her there.

Though ladies aren't the same but I am talking from experience.

Cc samhay

dukeolumde:



First u need to realise that it's all about the two of u (both families) and its ur call, hence the need to buckle up and take some harsh
decisions. U can cut cost by doing the following:

1. Arrange with both parents as regards ur intended decision to cut cost.
2. Carry ur wife along on ur plans.
3. Take a few key family members (carry ur inlaws along hence the need for them to do the same)and do all traditional rights in a day.
4. Next ur White Wedding / Trad in a single day. White in the morning and Trad after Church service and reception (in a field or other cheap venues/options) afterwards.
5. Invite few key individuals to the reception e.g both families, church and key friends.
6. Have a BUDGET in mind of the expected expenditure to be made and number of guests expected and STICK to it.

NOTE: Ensure quality guests are invited in order to improve ur expected income (cash gifts).
CONCLUSION: No matter the amount u spend u can never satisfy everybody. People will still complain. Therefore
the sooner u realise that it balls down to having a reserve to take care of ur wife afterwards the better for u. Accept my congratulations bro.

herboshedhe:

I reason with your point,but what do you suggest to them?

Cos I've got no idea on what to advise,mere looking@the members of the wife's church

sunshine1974:
Forget d crowd just cook for 200 people, anybody wen see food chop allahadudilahi, anyone wen no see chop e nor concern u period!

martineinstein:
come to think of it, marriage ceremony of nowadays is a waste of money.. U spend alot for the celebration, while the couple start thinking of how to post debt after

MyLady11:

Exactly. And is very bad. I hav a frnd who serve family biscuit in his wedding ceremony