Dear fellow nairalanders, let me not use the popular line that it happened to a friend. This is my story and I had to open a new account for security purposes.
We met 2001 in our year 1 in school and have remained friends.He did a 4 year programme while i did 5 years but all through we kept in touch because we lived in the same town. He graduated and went for service while I had to finish with school and go for law school. Throughout my breaks I would make out time to hang out with him. Fast forward to 2008, I went for service in the same town he was working and our friendship continued. We were there for each other and dating never crossed our minds then. 2009 I finished service and got married and he left for Lagos. That same year he left for the U.S and we were still in touch. We call, chat and Skype since then. Fast forward to this January, he called that he would be coming home to do his traditional wedding wth his wife from the US and he came. Few day before his departure cus he stayed for just 2 weeks, he called that he'd wanna see me before leaving. He had to come down to my see me in another state with gifts for me and my children. We laughed,gisted and later went to Jevinik to have lunch since we left from my office and from there I saw him off to park. We hugged and let go some tear drops. Since then, both of us have been in emotional turmoil. We have realised we have been in love all through these years but suppressed the feelings.
please I need matured advice esp from married NLders cus I can't think straight same with him over there. I can't stop thinking about him and he can't stay without calling to tell me how much he wishes to turn the hands of time and we are scared not to hurt our loved ones.

You have to let go of your feelings because it's too late,even if he feels d same way 4 u he just cant call off d wedding cos he must feel somerhin for dis other lady to plan marriage with her.So LET HIM GO!!

hmmmmm
since I'm not married lemme wait for comments

And what makes you think it's 'Love' ? look ma'am you've got a family now, kids and of cos a husby whom I suppose loves you. thats REALITY , come out of that ILLUSION , else you ruin your MARRIAGE ! and you will have yourself to BLAME ! better LET-GO off that feeling.

You're married right? I'm assuming you don't love your hubby and that's why you discovered you're in love with your besty.
My dear, emotion is a fraud. If you're not careful it will mess you up.

My advice, take your mind of that emotion so you don't regret it later. Moreover reduce that communication with your besty cos the more you spend time with him the more you feed the emotions and feelings.

Ps: when the chips are down, emotions will leave you hanging. Trust me a man gets over a emotional issues than woman.
My 1cent. Dollar is too expensive else I'd have given you 1.

they have said it all.. make I Just they look

Remove the thoughts of love for ur frnd, it myt not even b love sef, mayb just some weird creepy feelings(mayb shaa ) If its possible just avoid him for awhile (chatting, calling etc)
U r now married, n with kids!!!!!. Permit me to emphasize more.. ..."with kidssssssss!! !!!!!!." Abeg, think of the kids, dont destroy what u already have, specially if ur husband is awesome to u. U best learn to love him more o. U hv a wonderful home, great kids, a lovely husband n a great relationship wif him(i presume), abeg, no go cast oo. Just do the right thing, n u knw what it is. God help u ma'am.

Diddyydiva:
hmmmmm
since I'm not married lemme wait for comments

Oya, marry me naa.

Live your lives. You both love each other which is very normal.

The relationship is dead and gone. You must forget about him or get ready to face the shame therein

To get back yourself in track change your phone line (s)

Buy a phone (torch light) that will not allow you to do social network, after 4 months the feeling for him will die.

Then you will see reasons to love your husband and take of him and your children.

Just cut off all contact from him and save your marriage, yourself from shame and BIG had I know.

Good luck

make i just dey look

Happened to me but I started seeing her more like a sister and the funniest part , I so much loved her kids like my own so I had to take them like my gods children. Both families got to know each other better. She is in Texas with her husband and I will visit them before June this year. Love is real but it must not be in a romantic way.My wife is still jealous when ever I talk about her. Please never u compare Ur husband to him , it never helps and the more open u keep it the better. Don't cheat on Ur husband emotionally. Keep it open and handle maturely

it pains I wonder y none of u take the move before : been friends does not mean then if u lv each othet but now it's late

Sorry, Road's Closed.
You've got a family with kids too and he's about to.

You've got to let him go
It's already too late

Thank you all for your sincere comments and contributions. @ warripekin thanks so much. Experience they say is the best teacher. @AlexCk, I appreciate.

both of you are been irresponsible.... been in love is a choice....not just a feeling...

resipsa:
Dear fellow nairalanders, let me not use the popular line that it happened to a friend. This is my story and I had to open a new account for security purposes.
We met 2001 in our year 1 in school and have remained friends.He did a 4 year programme while i did 5 years but all through we kept in touch because we lived in the same town. He graduated and went for service while I had to finish with school and go for law school. Throughout my breaks I would make out time to hang out with him. Fast forward to 2008, I went for service in the same town he was working and our friendship continued. We were there for each other and dating never crossed our minds then. 2009 I finished service and got married and he left for Lagos. That same year he left for the U.S and we were still in touch. We call, chat and Skype since then. Fast forward to this January, he called that he would be coming home to do his traditional wedding wth his wife from the US and he came. Few day before his departure cus he stayed for just 2 weeks, he called that he'd wanna see me before leaving. He had to come down to my see me in another state with gifts for me and my children. We laughed,gisted and later went to Jevinik to have lunch since we left from my office and from there I saw him off to park. We hugged and let go some tear drops. Since then, both of us have been in emotional turmoil. We have realised we have been in love all through these years but suppressed the feelings.
please I need matured advice esp from married NLders cus I can't think straight same with him over there. I can't stop thinking about him and he can't stay without calling to tell me how much he wishes to turn the hands of time and we are scared not to hurt our loved ones.

U both are silly end of. Am sick of reading stories lik dis, d oda day one babe said her husby is ugly, another one said she was caught using pills. Be lik say na baby mama sure pass. I dey vex

resipsa:
Thank you all for your sincere comments and contributions. @ warripekin thanks so much. Experience they say is the best teacher. @AlexCk, I appreciate.

U r most welcome.

Estharfabian:

Hey pretty, I sent you a request on BB.

oh lawd ...what's this.
mistake and lesson people should learn from , it doesnt matter ur gender, if you are in love with someone, let them know how you feel.

This phase will pass in ur life though... maybe you and ur hubby weren't too close as friends bfre marriage or something but Pls don't cheat on him

this is y its gud to exercise patience b4 rushing into marriage...u cant do anytn abt it nw,u gats be content wit wah u ve n leave ur bestfrnd alone to enjoy hs marriage...

Bestie o bestie

im breaking all d rules im tryna make him my boo

op let me play u bestie by marvin stars

Ma'am no escuse for cheating ur hubby....u have to overcome that feeling....try to bring his pics on ur hubby, assume all that u love in him in ur.hubby.
God bless u

I guess this can happen when people are enjoying "presence" instead of talking the talk.

Sowwie too late for love things with him you have to stop contact to get over him remember the grass looks greener on the other side.

Hahahaha....laff just dey catch me, seriously i dunno why

This is why girls should desist from the evil of friendzoning guys, mtcheeews

goshen26:
Ma'am no escuse for cheating ur hubby....u have to overcome that feeling....try to bring his pics on ur hubby, assume all that u love in him in ur.hubby.
God bless u

Bless you too

firstking01:
This is why girls should desist from the evil of friendzoning guys, mtcheeews

I dey tell you!

I will advise u to concentrate on ur marriage and let go the bond both of u once had. U are in mess already cause u hav not allowed ur husband in. Take out the scales from ur eyes to enable u realise that what's brewing up inside of you has only one end disaster, nothing last forever.Good luck and God bless.

Some ppl no get sense sha




Even after getting married