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How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! - Career (3) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Taryur3(m): 6:45am On Jul 02, 2016
Eaugusta:
Report him to God with a sincere heart, do just 3 days prayer for him and I assure u that it will be over.

In times like this, I only cry to God.

I have only experienced it with a lecturer though, all I did was to report him to God and He fought the battle.
Hnmmm....the reporter...dey deceive yourself...u hear?
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by legalgoon: 6:47am On Jul 02, 2016
Florblu:
Before following this advice please make sure you've gotten another source of income.
Next time he tries to harass you(seems I read you were tempted to slap him)do it,give him a resounding slap if possible 3 resounding slaps.Create a wild scene let other staff witness this.Leave the office right away and report their the following day while you wait for your sack letter.


cheesy grin too funny but kinda the truth
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by telemapreye1(f): 6:47am On Jul 02, 2016
illuminada:


Lol...quitted.

Were the circumstances similar to hers? As in, an owner managed business...did you secure another job first or just quit notwithstanding
I passed the interview and got the job but after sometimes he wanted sex...But I refused so we started having issues,so i quit.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Seeeeeeee: 6:47am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
Jeez...i cant believe you typed this.
I'm sure you are just like the man
we men act depending on the behaviour of a lady, if you look like someone that can offer se.x we place demand.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by mccoy47(m): 6:48am On Jul 02, 2016
BiafraBushBoy:
I don't want to believe your story, But let me read through again and find something tangible...

I will be right back smiley
A typical biafran reasoning undecided

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by illuminada: 6:50am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
I passed the interview and got the job but after sometimes he wanted sex...But I refused so we started having issues,so i quit.

Maybe I see things differently because I'm a guy...but, did you do anything that aroused his desire for sex?
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by telemapreye1(f): 6:51am On Jul 02, 2016
Seeeeeeee:
we men act depending on the behaviour of a lady, if you look like someone that can offer se.x we place demand.
Just hold your lips there...some men are agent of darkness.
No matter what you wear they will still come after you.
I have once been in her shoes.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Taryur3(m): 6:51am On Jul 02, 2016
oluala881:
My sister handle it maturelyn if you resign t'he next work you get do you know what will happen there. Secondly you have to change his mentality about you because for men to do that t'he mentality about t'he lady is questioned thirdly your dressing must be decent and finaly dont slap him but put your feet down give him a sound warning and each time he is about trying that you are to work out of t'he office and you have to be reservative if you talk too much. For further advice contact m'he on 08060112037 or bbm 261E192B. Thanks
Lols...Mr Adviser....I guess you looking for your own way to get in contact with the OP....My God will expose you...
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by SmithHumble50: 6:52am On Jul 02, 2016
Estherfaith:


No, I am not a virgin and I am a little above the normal average cup size, so my cloths might look 'too fitting', but I am a lady, I cover up well.
Yes, I feel my silence made it get to this stage. unfortunately, he is the owner of the company.

Since he is the owner just keep Dustin ur table as u will soon be leaving that place bcuz either ways it won't be good for u..

Bcuz if u slap him.. U will be definitely be sacked..
If u decide he eats ur "cookie" that will be it.. He will turn u to his sex machine and if he gets tired of u.. Another fresh pussey will replace u..

It's a lose lose situation for u either way!
Act wisely!

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Akjr(m): 6:55am On Jul 02, 2016
No man or guys wll do dah 2 u if u dressing decent. Am a guy. I knw wen guys or men feel dah urges to do somfin foolish.. Might b d way u laf, dress or behave... Dnt loose ya job ooo. Oda whil u wll stil gv it 2 a g! Dah does nt mattr.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by afanide: 6:55am On Jul 02, 2016
Your appearance in Important here...

How do you Appear before your Boss

A=Descent
B=Half Naked
C=Tight/revealling Clothes
D=Sexy
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Eaugusta(f): 6:55am On Jul 02, 2016
Taryur3:

Hnmmm....the reporter...dey deceive yourself...u hear?


Tnx, I only pray for people like you. It takes grace to knw what God can do in your life.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by telemapreye1(f): 6:57am On Jul 02, 2016
illuminada:


Maybe I see things differently because I'm a guy...but, did you do anything that aroused his desire for sex?
I never did cos I wear only skirt and gown to work...Although am this slim girl so anything I put on fits me well but that doesn't warrant his attitude..He is just a womaniser and he told me I was the first girl to turn down his offer smiley so that why he was so desperate to get me but b4 he could I already quit.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by ojuu4u(m): 6:57am On Jul 02, 2016
[quote author=Estherfaith post=46981935]I usually don't do this, but right now I am so angry I want to resign.

I started working here almost 2 years ago, and sincerely at a point, I wanted to resign because my boss was very difficult, I never did anything right in his sight.



Am very sure when you started d job, newly, u had been playing him or male co-workers in ur ofice un-controllbly. This made him bilvd you are a "flirt" a man can neva & ever touch ur private parts if you havent gone beyond ur bondaries before, ie, playing excessevly wt him, asking him to pay ur bills, giving him facial expresions, mode of dresings etc. U were nt acting maturely as you claimed o, but acting weakly. (d way u acted to him sugested u may sucumb if he puts more presure as some ladies do)
Solutions, since u stil need his job, I tink facia expresions wil do d job.
1.DNT GV HIM FACE AGAIN.
2.UR MODE OF DRESIN ADJUST IT.
3. TELL HIM THAT HE CLAIMS TO BE BORN AGAIN (ds wil touch him)
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Seeeeeeee: 6:58am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
Just hold your lips there...some men are agent of darkness.
No matter what you wear they will still come after you.
I have once been in her shoes.
You will not understand.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Taryur3(m): 7:03am On Jul 02, 2016
Eaugusta:


Tnx, I only pray for people like you. It takes grace to knw what God can do in your life.

Lols...Pastor Mrs...dnt stop praying for me o please...I just smells lies in your post...pls forgive me...if u mad at that
..
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by ofemigeorge(m): 7:05am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
Big lie....i don't wear trousers to work just skirt and fitted Infact I don't apply makeup but my boss still harassed me sexually.
OK OK I heard you. But am just pointing out to you the way men think. So take it easy. There is no lie in all I said. Hmmmm.. .well use the word of your mouth pray to God and tell that man your stand is strictly business or work.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Eaugusta(f): 7:06am On Jul 02, 2016
Taryur3:

Lols...Pastor Mrs...dnt stop praying for me o please...I just smells lies in your post...pls forgive me...if u mad at that
..
I never posted for u to believe, ur thoughts! Ur business bro
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by illuminada: 7:07am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
I never did cos I wear only skirt and gown to work...Although am this slim girl so anything I put on fits me well but that doesn't warrant his attitude..He is just a womaniser and he told me I was the first girl to turn down his offer smiley so that why he was so desperate to get me but b4 he could I already quit.

Hmmm....may really have nothing to do with clothing. He may have taken a cue from the things you say or your general disposition at the office. You did a good thing by sticking to your guns though
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by tottinova: 7:08am On Jul 02, 2016
Estherfaith:
I usually don't do this, but right now I am so angry I want to resign.

I started working here almost 2 years ago, and sincerely at a point, I wanted to resign because my boss was very difficult, I never did anything right in his sight.

Fast forward a year later,

due to the nature of my job, I spend most of my office hours with him, and now my very stupid boss is sexually harassing me, it started with just holding my hands but right now it has gotten to him trying to move his hands close to my private part! I am not exaggerating here!.. I have been acting really matured and trying to act professional but this afternoon was the height of it, he told me 'why are you acting like a virgin sef', I almost slapped him

Please I need advice on this, how do I handle work place harassment please, without it leading to court and all that. I have gotten angry, I have told him I am not comfortable with it, but he still continues, trying to push his luck the next time..

Anybody that have experienced such situation should let me know how they overcame it without destroying the business relationship you've worked so hard for.

Pardon my creation of a new Moniker, I have advertised a position here and I will not want the name of the company searched and displayed.

Just leave that place biko
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Taryur3(m): 7:10am On Jul 02, 2016
Eaugusta:

I never posted for u to believe, ur thoughts! Ur business bro
Lols...
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by LikeJesus: 7:12am On Jul 02, 2016
The poster above made a valid point without God's intervention you are already on your way out of the company. if you give in to his advances, you will end up used and dumped . If you don't cooperate, he likely will replace you with a more willing lady.

But with God, you can keep your job until you are ready to quit. After praying, work up to him in private and respectfully give him reasons why you can't give in to his advances. I sincerely hope your reasons are based on your fear of God.

But to be proactive, buy one of those spy cameras camouflaged as watches, pens, pendants etc. Get some videos and audio recording of his escapades and keep it as a last resort. If you must show him the videos, make sure you made copies and given to a trusted sympathetic friend. And make it clear to your boss that if anything should happen to you, the videos would be shown to the police and the public. But be careful with blackmail oooo. It's too dangerous in a place like Nigeria. Just use them if need be to buy time. Because after that you can never be comfortable with him around.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by XX01(f): 7:13am On Jul 02, 2016
The truth is, if you keep refusing him, he will fire you when he gets tired of running after you. He probably wants someone who will do the work and also warm him bed.

Get strong evidence against him such as a video or voice recording and use that to keep him at abeyance. Make copies and keep. Don't blackmail him because that would be illegal.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by ofemigeorge(m): 7:13am On Jul 02, 2016
telemapreye1:
Just hold your lips there...some men are agent of darkness.
No matter what you wear they will still come after you.
I have once been in her shoes.
Then if that man is an agent of darkness use prayer to fight him off. And if he is not ...politely let him know you ready more concerned abt company growth, your work and you are strictly against office relationship. You only need to show yourself very relevant inbthe company, hardworking, that he will not have any thing to hold against you. In the university days I have never seen the very intelligent fist class female student sexually harassed by lectureres. It's only those that don't know anything that are victim. Do your work very well.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by babayega(m): 7:15am On Jul 02, 2016
Get video evidence. Get a cheap spy pen (3500-5000) attach it to your bag or cloth whenever he summons you to the places these "harassment" happens. After getting the evidence...the next time it happens, tell him you are considering reporting to the police. If it continues, report to police.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Jfactor(m): 7:20am On Jul 02, 2016
Very easy, buy a small phone that can video. Buy a memory card of 32gig. Put the phone in aircraft mode (u will see the symbol of a plane). Then adjust the volume to the loudest. When he calls for you anytime. Press recording and place the phone on your waistline facing forward, start recording as you lev ur table. When you enter the office, repeatedly say 'Goodday Sir, you called for me' , do not sit, because he may come behind you and grab your waist. When he trys anything, make sure he 'touches you probably on your boobs' and then you say 'Mr so and so, I am warning you to please stop these harassments, this is X number of times, you are Sexually Harrasing me. You keep touching my buttocks, waist and even pressing or rubbing your p E n I s when you pass by my ass'. Pls before you record and place the phone on your hips, try it at home and see if it will record as you are walking around in your closet.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by 2sexycom(m): 7:21am On Jul 02, 2016
aaronson:
Make money off him. How?

Next time he tryna harass you, Just stylishly get your phone to record this conversation.

Question his motive then after his slick answer of "why are you acting like a virgin?"

Slap the daylight out of him maybe twice.

He would fire you, then you sue his pervert a ss to court. Your phone recorded convo would serve as evidence againt him. OR if he doesn't fire you, he will never harass you again.

But ensure you slap him because that would be the reason you gonna get fired or respected if not fired.
spy pen will more damage or dent to his image than just phone recording.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Nobody: 7:25am On Jul 02, 2016
Estherfaith:


No, I am not a virgin and I am a little above the normal average cup size, so my cloths might look 'too fitting', but I am a lady, I cover up well.
Yes, I feel my silence made it get to this stage. unfortunately, he is the owner of the company.
if he iindeed the owner of the company. There is realky nothing you can do except he rapes or molest then you call the cops or you slap him before he does something nasty then you get fired.
Sorry..this is happening to you in a lawless country.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Nobody: 7:28am On Jul 02, 2016
Seeeeeeee:
Ok what do u want to hear?
From your statemet he started by holding your hand and you acted maturely...

Now his hands is getting down your private part according by your post....


We men behave funny when we see a girl as cheap with slutry behaviour, so co ordinate your self no man will try lowering his hand down your private part in the office or talk of sex with you if you behave responsible.

Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by ofemigeorge(m): 7:29am On Jul 02, 2016
Most ladies make the mistake of saying.. .am dressing for my own comfort, am not doing it to get attracted. And they dress seductively. Or they defend their dressing and say it's decent am covered up na. Or they use the silent (I don't want to hurt him or make him think am weird)syndrome,in fighting off male predators. Well am sorry for them.
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by Nobody: 7:33am On Jul 02, 2016
@OP
You watched him start by holding your hand inappropriately and you kept mute ? Or in your own words acted maturely? Lol
You made yourself appear cheap hence your boss is just acting as he would to any cheap girl.
The In the words of the great chapel

If a woman says because I'm dressed or act a certain way does not make me a wh0re!" Which is true,. Just because a woman dresses or acts a certain way doesn't mean they are a certain way.

Don't even forget it. But ladies, you must understand that is bloody confusing. It just is. Now that would be like me, walking down the street in a policeman's uniform. Somebody might run up on me saying, "Oh, thank God. Officer, help us! Theives are there. Help us!" " imagine me saying Just because I'm dressed this way does not make me a police officer!" See what I mean? All right?
You are not a wh0re. But your attitude and dressing are the markings of a wh0re's uniform, you get the point?
So while you blame your boss here remember you caused this
Re: How Do I Handle Work Place Sexual Harassment. HELP! by ThrillmeatRep(f): 7:33am On Jul 02, 2016
Threats and shouts dont work
Start job hunting asap

Estherfaith:
I usually don't do this, but right now I am so angry I want to resign.

I started working here almost 2 years ago, and sincerely at a point, I wanted to resign because my boss was very difficult, I never did anything right in his sight.

Fast forward a year later,

due to the nature of my job, I spend most of my office hours with him, and now my very stupid boss is sexually harassing me, it started with just holding my hands but right now it has gotten to him trying to move his hands close to my private part! I am not exaggerating here!.. I have been acting really matured and trying to act professional but this afternoon was the height of it, he told me 'why are you acting like a virgin sef', I almost slapped him

Please I need advice on this, how do I handle work place harassment please, without it leading to court and all that. I have gotten angry, I have told him I am not comfortable with it, but he still continues, trying to push his luck the next time..

Anybody that have experienced such situation should let me know how they overcame it without destroying the business relationship you've worked so hard for.

Pardon my creation of a new Moniker, I have advertised a position here and I will not want the name of the company searched and displayed.

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