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HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? - Romance - Nairaland

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HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by an0daGuy: 2:02pm On Jul 28, 2016
i had to open a new account to post this. It is a long post but i need your understanding.

i am a student. I came here from another state without having much money to get an accomodation as well as offset admin bills a year ago and so i hooked up with a friend i knew and i started squatting with him from that first day i arrived in the town. He too is a final year student in the same school so i stayed with him in a hostel off campus.

We were nice roomates. He had this girl that he was dating at the time and they once fell apart due to no business of mine and they took a break from each other. She stopped coming around during that time and i thought her chapter had closed. I had another close friend who was coming into the town to resume at a new job he just landed in the same town. He didnt have any accomodation as well and did not know anyone apart from me. I decided to help him so i spoke to my roomate then about it telling him that the guy will just stay a night or two and hopefully by then he would have paid for a place and then he will be out. He asked me how sure i was and i assured him that i knew the guy to come from a rich family and he is only in this predicament because he is coming to a new place. I explained that i was the only person that could help him with familiarity because he does not come from the tribe particular to the town we are in and wont know how to speak the language with the locals well to get the accomodation on time.

My roomate willingly agreed to let him stay for a while and i then called my other friend to confirm the date he would be arriving and i also told my roomate too. Then fast forward to that arrival date, my other friend called that he was on his way and i confirmed to my roomate that my guy was on his way and he acknowledged it.

I didnt know that this my roomate had managed to get in touch with that his prior girlfriend one way or the other and she visited. They then somehow made up and the girl seemed to be willing to spend the night (i never knew as i was not around most of the day)

When i returned and observed everything happening i then called my guy aside and reminded him of our guest coming into town soon and he nodded in affirmation again. I then relaxed and thought that the girl may not stay the night after all (this was aroung 9pm). Now usually whenever female visitors had to sleep over one of us would go to sleep elsewhere for the time but at that particular time we were aware that no nearby person was available who would accomodate 2 extra sleep over buddies.

When this my friend arrived i gave him directions to the hostel. He arrived and i took him to the room. He kept his bag and we were gisting then my roomate called me outside. When i was alone with him, te told me that his girl will be staying the night and me and my friend should get somewhere else to sleep. I was shocked and begged him not to embarrass me. I suggested that he should tell the girl to come back the next day or if the konji too much we will give him chance to do something and she could go . . . but he refused. He just told me straight up that we should go for that night and after we almost argued he left me and barged into the room telling that my newly arrived friend to leave the room. I came in and said that we will go sleep elsewhere but my roomate still insisted that he takes his bag along with him. I begged for the bag to be in a corner while we come back tomorrow to pick it up but he disagreed.

Finally my friend carried his bag, and i also had to pack up my own bag and leave the room too that same night. I left because could not bear to leave that my guy alone at that time of the night and go elsewhere while he had nowhere to go. Plus i was livid and just did not care anymore. I knew i had since over stayed my welcome at that place but i didnt imagine i would get thrown off in that way. We slept in an uncompleted building for two days and on the third day with the help of an agent my friend got a flat in the town. I moved in with him and attended school from here. We have been roomates for 5 months now. He travelled for a few days for a burial and i am alone at home.

That my former roomate had since graduated but had a problem. His rent had expired too. He had to travel down to town to write some exams and he called me for help as all his friends had either graduated too or do not have accomodation. I happily told him to come and he did. He has been here for 4 days now due to irregular exam timetable but we initially thought he will stay for only 2 days. Personally i myself do not mind him staying for as long as he likes because he also helped me too, but the real owner of this apartment (my other friend) would be returning in a day time and i do not think if he meets this guy here he will be happy.

I have both as friends but i do not know how to tackle this decision. This my friend here very well knows who owns this apartment and i am sure he remembers the kind of situation in which they met those months ago but i believe he does not think of it as that big a deal because even after i have told him a few times when my roomate will be back he still does not show signs of worrying so right now i have many questions playing in my mind.

should i let him stay and see the reaction of my roomate when he gets back and meets him here?

should i tell my roomate on the phone right now about my/our guest and guage his response even if he could be angry with me afterwards and probably throw me out again as well?

or should i just kick this guy out today and live with my conscience afterwards?

Please mature comments. I am not too bouyant at the moment due to some issues hence my accomodation challenges this past year but i have to attend school.

Thanks for reading
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by abdeiz(m): 2:12pm On Jul 28, 2016
Well well well what a predicament do we have here. Op I'd advise you to look inward, if you're not comfortable with keeping secrets call your friend and tell him about your guest so as to gauge his reaction, chances are he could be as forgiving as you. This is a really small world, we reap what we soon sometimes much sooner than we expect.

5 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by ronald4lif(m): 2:12pm On Jul 28, 2016
Call your friend on the phone and inform him of his lodging in his house and prevail on him to let bygone be bygone but if he repudiate all plea entries then inform this friend what the owner of the house said and he should please leave.

Should he insist on not leaving then just stay withdrawn until he comes kick him out himself. I don't think he's going to kick you out as well if he comes.

3 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by hertz9te(m): 2:14pm On Jul 28, 2016
kai...i swear i want to say something,buh reading this story over again...bro i cant advice on this one oh..you know kukuma get money i for say make u go rent house.maybe the next poster will have something to say
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by general111(m): 2:15pm On Jul 28, 2016
Man!!tell your friend who owns the house before he comes back oh.else he will feel betrayed by you oh.

6 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by yomi007k(m): 2:20pm On Jul 28, 2016
ur roommate is a wicked soul.
God will deal with him

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by gabinogem(m): 2:24pm On Jul 28, 2016
U should have earlier told him that it was that ur friend he kicked out, his apartment u are staying, and that u don't think he's going to be pleased seeing him there... Just to avoid this dilemma u are in now.

Right now u need to let ur friend know about that püccy nigga's presence so that he won't be shocked thinking u are conniving with the püccy nigga.

If I was ur friend, I come to my apartment to see the püccy nigga that drove me away from his apartment becus of a püccy! I certainly won't be pleased with u

7 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by tonio2wo: 2:26pm On Jul 28, 2016
You have a problem of being too nice.
For the fact that ur squartee threw u out in d night with no place to stay I already a pay off from u.

4 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by goldbim(f): 2:29pm On Jul 28, 2016
Wow!!!its quite a serious issue.in the first place,you ought to inform the owner of the apartment that you have a guest while he's away..God forbid anything happens.also,its left to your friend to decide maybe the 3rd guy can stay or not..you can only convince him not to pay evil with evil..

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Ejemehn(m): 2:32pm On Jul 28, 2016
You've got a good heart. Do not let anyone change that. Though, always apply wisdom.

I believe your wicked and insensitive friend forgot that popular saying "No condition is permanent".

The ass he kicked sometimes ago is the same ass he's about to kiss

Tell that wicked friend you'll call the house owner and tell him he (wicked friend) is around and whatever he (house owner) ask you to do, you'll do. Even if it means throwing him out the same way he threw you guys out.

4 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Nobody: 2:33pm On Jul 28, 2016
You should have told the owner of the house before accommodating the other guy.....still I think you should let him know ( the owner) before he comes back.

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Essence6055: 2:36pm On Jul 28, 2016
Just let the owner of the apartment make the decision himself... who knows he may be nice at heart... The highest he may do is throw you friend out and warn you never to allow him in

So let him be

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Originalsly: 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2016
Why would you accommodate a guest without permission from the owner? You have to apologize ad let him know immediately.... then depending on his reaction on knowing who it is.... you'll know whether to ask him of the guest can stay over for another two days or whatever....or.... if the reaction is not good... not to raise that question and inform the guest that he has to leave.... voluntarily. .. or by force. You shouldn't feel bad/guilty since the flat owner makes the deision.

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by GoldenJAT(m): 3:51pm On Jul 28, 2016
willingly did he kicked u out and never looked back... tell him same way he told u about his gf staying over.... if it was ur apartment, it would have been a different ball game, but nope.. the real owner of d aos was also involved... I tell u this with all confidence bro... that nigga ain't someone 2 lookout 4!!he will still do same 2u,if d opportunity still presents itself... he is even shameless and without a conscience, tell him off, and discuss with ur roomie when he comes bk, if he accepts 2 let him stay, so b it.. if he doesn't... it ain't ur fault..an eye 4 an eye will live us with 1 good eyes.. u ain't no JESUS.

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Nobody: 4:04pm On Jul 28, 2016
na u Bleep up...y u wld invite sumone to ur guy hwz without informing ur friend...pesin giv u bread, u dey ask am for butter
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Divinehenrich(m): 4:12pm On Jul 28, 2016
Bros, you should have informed the owner of the apartment before allowing that your ex-wicked room mate in.
Pick up your phone & inform him(owner of the apartment) immediately of the new visitor in the house. Whatever he said, then communicate to the new visitor.

Oh, I hope your ex-heartless roommate is not from Mbaise.

4 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by YabaLeftist: 4:27pm On Jul 28, 2016
You have no right whatsoever to invite someone to a room that is not yours without the express permission of the real owner of the room. You hurriedly invited your former room mate to come and stay with you when the room is not yours. How daft can you get!

Before you invited your current roommate months ago, you sought the permission of your then roommate. But now you didn't deem it fit to seek the permission of your present roommate before inviting someone who didn't even allow your present roommate to stay a night. Really how foolishh can one get! You're being benevolent with someone else's property.

I hope he comes back and throws the both of you outta the house. After all you never showed him any special favors initially, all you did was accompany him that night he was sent out.

Some people can be real silly. Sheeshh!

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Nobody: 4:45pm On Jul 28, 2016
Tell d ex roomate that he has to leave and explain d situation to him. And remind him what he did to your curent roommate. Thats reason enough for him to leave quietly without begging.. If he begs..kick him out it means hes aslso trying to get you kicked out..if were your current roomate i fit burst ur head..d guy made u sleep outside 4 two days. The least u can do is tell him to leave now..

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Nobody: 4:48pm On Jul 28, 2016
Ah.d guy pursue u just to taste his ex and im sure dey're no longer together now he remembers that friendship is also important..

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by RichieDaVinci01(m): 4:58pm On Jul 28, 2016
Shey this one na problem shaa......He threw you out late in the night My uncle do the same to him jae throw him out like around 11pm

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Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by an0daGuy: 5:11pm On Jul 28, 2016
gabinogem
goldbim
shoyemiayodeji
Originalsly
nnamdiokere45
YabaLeftist

Thanks for saying something, i appreciate it.

I understand that i really messed up by inviting him over without first seeking permission from the owner of the place, but in reality i never intended for him to stay this long. I thought that before the week elapses he would have been through with the paper and gone back long ago without my current roomate returning home to meet him here or ever knowing about him being here.

I usually come back from lectures with friends that stay till night time before going or even sleeping over on several occasions and my roomate never takes offence. We live in solitude and the house gets quiet and lonely sometimes with 2 guys living alone most of the time and it is a 2 bedroom apartment.

I am just worried because of the history we have with this particular guest and it is because of the way they postponed some exams and my lack of foresight.

I realize that i have to take part of the blame. I have read through the few posts here and feel very bad, like i should never have even brought this guy here or still maintained communication with him after that thing he did but i indeed have a soft spot for people i call friends. I do not even know how to put my mouth on phone and tell my present roomate what i have done because it indeed feels like a betrayal of trust on some levels, i could keep it a secret to save myself some face if he does not ever find out.

I am thinking of telling this guy to leave by tomorrow because my roomate will be returning latest on sunday. I hope i can keep a straight face when i am telling him off with conviction because until now i have not shown any signs him of the stuff going on in my mind concerning this issue and he is still here feeling relaxed.
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by an0daGuy: 5:12pm On Jul 28, 2016
YabaLeftist:
You have no right whatsoever to invite someone to a room that is not yours without the express permission of the real owner of the room. You hurriedly invited your former room mate to come and stay with you when the room is not yours. How daft can you get!

Before you invited your current roommate months ago, you sought the permission of your then roommate. But now you didn't deem it fit to seek the permission of your present roommate before inviting someone who didn't even allow your present roommate to stay a night. Really how foolishh can one get! You're being benevolent with someone else's property.

I hope he comes back and throws the both of you outta the house. After all you never showed him any special favors initially, all you did was accompany him that night he was sent out.

Some people can be real silly. Sheeshh!


i value my friendship circles to the extent of giving people second chances. I know not many people feel the same way as i do.
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by vicstar(m): 5:14pm On Jul 28, 2016
an0daGuy:
i had to open a new account to post this. It is a long post but i need your understanding.




• • • • • Bro I gave up wen I read diz paragraph cry
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by an0daGuy: 5:15pm On Jul 28, 2016
Ejemehn:
You've got a good heart. Do not let anyone change that. Though, always apply wisdom.

I believe your wicked and insensitive friend forgot that popular saying "No condition is permanent".

The ass he kicked sometimes ago is the same ass he's about to kiss

Tell that wicked friend you'll call the house owner and tell him he (wicked friend) is around and whatever he (house owner) ask you to do, you'll do. Even if it means throwing him out the same way he threw you guys out.





thank you for the kind words but this my heart sometimes makes me act in funny ways that i myself sometimes feel amazed at my actions.
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by an0daGuy: 5:17pm On Jul 28, 2016
vicstar:



• • • • • Bro I gave up wen I read diz paragraph cry

Thanks for going through it anyway
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by vicstar(m): 5:28pm On Jul 28, 2016
an0daGuy:

Thanks for going through it anyway


cool
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Fidelismaria: 5:35pm On Jul 28, 2016
Kick his black ass out

3 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by ENEMIESENEMY(m): 6:37pm On Jul 28, 2016
An eye for an eye, makes us all blind. Good one you accepted your former roomate to spend his time for the few days. If situation arises again, do it again, accept him, well, except this time if he empties your bank account. LOL

But, like a lot of people have said, you should have informed the owner of the apartment, but, what's done is done, we don't cry over broken egg.

Take responsibility.

Reach your friend, tell him the situation on ground, explain well to him, this kind of issue a good explanation on WhatsApp would do, so he would take his time to read it and digest before replying. And also, try to make him consider and forgive your friend, because, come on, you can't throw him to the street. He knows what he did and if he had an option he wouldn't have settled to stay with you. He has no option.

Then whatever the owner of the apartmenr says is what you have to do, it is his apartment.

2 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by DIKEnaWAR: 6:44pm On Jul 28, 2016
You should have called the owner of the house and told him who was asking to come to his house. If he agrees, fine. If he doesn't, tell your friend he said no. No biggie.

Now that you have made the mistake of allowing him in, it behoves on you to kick him out before the owner comes. Cos if na me, I go kick the idiot out.

Finally, learn how to say NO to people without being apologetic.

2 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Nobody: 6:56pm On Jul 28, 2016
Now this is a pickle.
Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by bosco9: 7:14pm On Jul 28, 2016
I almost wept reading your story, I remembered I was kicked out of the house I was staying with a friend, I even came here on Nairaland to beg for accommodation assistance, I got no reply, but thank God for who he his, I have been able to build my own house, I am now a landlord . So please OP pardon your friend and help him if you can, you will never regret it

4 Likes

Re: HELP! Should I Kick My Friend Out Of The House Or Let Him Stay? by Richy4(m): 8:39pm On Jul 28, 2016
Pick that phone up young man and call your friend immediately.....Start with preaching about how God said u should forgive one another....

complete the preaching by saying God said we should pay evil with Good...or else u will find yourself outside..and circle of life will continue...

God i wish i was there just to look at your friend's face when the owener of the apartment arrive...

1 Like

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