₦airaland Forum

iLegend:
Hihihi. Sweetheart, no be so nah.

Okay, I want to propose to you. If you reject me I'll commit suicide in 2003. Abeg, carry pink handkerchief tie for your eyes. It's a surprise. I want to do something no one has ever done. If you don tie am lemme know.

iLegend:
You're been too pushy, too needy and desperate. You may not realize it.

We (humans) hate something that's too easy to get or something that's readily available.

I was at a party some years ago. I made a strong eye contact with a hot chick. I wooed her with body language. Some hours later she was high on some shìt.

On her royal highness, she grabbed me and tried to kiss me. I freaked out, cuz she gave herself to me without wooing her. My thought was: if she can do this to me that means she has been doing it to others. ALL the good looks and the bright future behind her disappeared from my brain. She was so damn cute for what she did.

No one likes cheap things or things that are easily archived. They don't have value.

Stop disturbing her for a month. Write her number somewhere and delete the one you saved. Real men don't do this, but do it to avoid "tempted to call/text." After a month save if back and be the naughty bad boy she craves.

iLegend:
Hahaha, u dey joke with God? No try am o!

God is our strength and He knows it.

iLegend:
Hihi. I want to cry on TV too.

iLegend:
STOP DISTURBING WOMEN ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND ON CALLS

Read this post and you'll have a rethink 'you needy custards.' You can change the cu to ba.

Listen, after reading this article you'll NEVER act needy again when you send a woman a message or a call, but she didn't pick or reply your message.

Women operate with emotion and instinct, but men operate with logic and hammer. They're always looking for a nail to hit the logic on, but those nails have emotions and NOT logic. There's a way you'll hit a nail hard and it'll bend.

If other carpenters (men) hit a nail so hard without bending that doesn't mean if you hit the nail it won't bend. It may.

Men are hammers and women are nails.

Hit the nail anyhow and the hammer will hit on your leg or hand. Hit the nail anyhow and the nail will pull off and hit your eyes. Hit the nail anyhow and the nail will bend. So, learn how to hit a nail or don't EVER hit a nail. Go make money. Simple.

Now, this is the deal.

Whenever you're sending a woman a message tell yourself this "I know I'll get the reply of this message by next year, so fúck it." I didn't say you should type and send the above text o! Say it to yourself, then send your message and move on with another girl or something more meaningful, else you'll become needy and desperate; it'll make you check her profile every 5 minutes to see if she has read it or if she's online... Chaii, Mr. Needy and Low Life CHANGE. Abeg, CHANGE.

If a girl did not reply you after knowing fully well she had read it, ask yourself these 15 questions before you start to get mad and bombard her with desperate and angry messages.

15. Is she alive? (The rate at which people are dying is alarming. Sometimes, people die at unexpected hours and their relatives or friends handle their phones at the moment).

14. What if she has a boyfriend who's a naughty bad boy and the boyfriend presses all her ESCOFi mumu buttons better than you?

13. What if she doesn't really like you? Some women have class and if you don't meet their standards they may NEVER look at you, let alone chat with you. (Take heart, don't cry. Learn how to fùck and how to make money. She'll hear your story on CNN and she'll be the one to fight for your love).

12. Mood: Mood changes everything. Most women can't control their emotions. Someone else will offend them at home or somewhere and they'll vent the anger on anymore who crosses their lanes, either online or offline. At this point, a woman needs some space/time. Give it to her or get served with a red card

11. What if she has lost a relative, a friend, a colleague or any form of death in her circles of life. She'll be mourning and won't be in the mood to reply.

10. What if she's out doing something more fun or tasking that requires 90% of her attention? And the only free thing she can do is read her notifications and put her phone back in her pocket or bag?

9. Migraine: What if she's seeing her period? You know how painful it can be in some months. Give her space. Cramp hurts. Thank God I'm a tránsgender.

8. Manner and ego: What if she has an attitude and a first class citizen ego? She'll look down on you until she feels you have reached her level. Give her space if you're a nice guy. Only good bad boys can handle her.

7. Boring: Mr. Plenty English or Mr. Plenty Pidgin. What if u're tooking grammaring to scattering her womandula oblongata? Or what if you're just too matured for her and she sees your chat as boring Matured people or people who have professional works or university degrees are 98% boring when they chat. They tend to act porsche and speak clean English. They don't even use abbriv. Or smiley faces like: Lol, #Wink, Brb, Aiit, ATM, Hu dis? Etc. And they hate to chat naughty chats. It's good to be porsche and speak good English, but mix it up a little.

6. Better: What if you're too good for her? When a woman knows you're a complete package she'll ignore you like say tomorrow no dey. She go dey fear you. She'll be scared of your mission in her life — self-esteem issues. Some girls do ask me "What did you see in me? With all these girls throwing themselves at you." She knows other girls like you, so what did you see in her? She'll brainwash herself just to avoid you. Sometimes, she'll act friendly and before you know it, she'll disappear to protect herself from falling deeply in love with you and getting heart broken at the end.

5. What if her phone has been seized by her ex or her new jealous boyfriend who wants to investigate the kind of messages she receives?

4. What if she's sick and doesn't have the strength to type at the hospital?

3. What if she's preparing for exams or in an uncomfortable place to reply you?

2. What if her phone/battery is bad/down? Or what if her phone got missing or erroneously wiped off?

1. What if she receives 400 messages a day and there are a lot of guys who stand out more than you and they're more fun to chat with?

Extra: What if she's fúcking a gooood fúck with iLegend™?

Stop bombarding women with messages if they don't reply you quickly. IT SHOWS LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND NEEDINESS. Women hate needy men.

This is what I do. The moment I send someone a message I'll slide my hand on his or her message and it'll be moved to my archive.

If they don't reply it'll remain in that archive, but if they reply it'll pop back up. I hardly check my archive; I have close to 500 archived messages and it keeps increasing everyday.

If you have things in abundance or you're truly a busy guy, you won't worry about replies or no replies.

Idle nice guys worry about replies as if their lives depend it. DON'T BE ONE OF THEM.

Look for troubles, but make sure they're nonviolent.

Keep safe

— iLegend™

iLegend:
Chaii! My baby does not love me again. I approached a soldier last year at First Bank and told him I want to be his friend in front of everyone. The boldness shocked him. He became a little nervous. Soldiers too dey fear. He refused giving me his number cuz he thought I was a spy or something. I have lots of soldier friends just by doing that. You'll be amazed at how friendly soldiers are. I love going out with them on t-shirt. You won't know who they are until you look for trouble. But to slap 10 of them? Na early grave be that.

Let's be serious. I want to propose to you. Although, I have not bought a gold ring yet. Abeg, make we manage rubber ring. Please, bear with me. The economy is bad.

My wifey wifey! I can't wait to get you pregnant and that will happen in my clean kitchen.

iLegend:
Chaii! My bae don dey get mouth o! Hmmm! It's such a turn on. But I hope say you no go drag daddy's trouser o! Daddy dey watch you. #smiles. I'll tell our kids all these things mummy did to daddy on Nairaland.

iLegend:
Deleted