Babe stay calm, be supportive and pray for him. Things will surely change and he will never forget you.

33bandit:
when in a relationship be with someone who listens to your advice and see sense in your point of view when there is actually one .
when one has passion for something .it should not be in a way that they become selfish thinking about themselves all alone .I can't imagine a first class student thinking this way .wait do first class students have time for music .I hate to admit .I ditch a friend who is so obsessed to this upcoming artist thing .upcoming me arse.mi dear move on .he is not ready to face the future .when he is fully an artist .he would go round chasing dem girls be for maybe .which is under probability he settles for u .

first class have time for music yes, but he can look for a menial job before he gets a better one to support his dream,

rockstarB:

Thanks for this. He is actually getting there, am only worried about his finance.

You have every reason to be worried about his finances and you also have every right to know his vision and plans for his finances.
Give him suggestions on how he can make money from his passion.
If he can play the drums or the keyboard, he has the potential to make at least N10,000 every Sunday in church service depending on where he stays.
He can start playing professionally for money.
If he can combine singing with something that is less demanding, it's perfect, else allow him and pray for him.

The TRUTH!
You are both on different pages of your relationship. You have not both defined your destination.

You are thinking of Marriage
He is thinking of Career

He is still young and time is on his side
You want to maximize your remaining time.

Yes, he is focused. But the music industry is in reality brutal. You don't make it just because you are creative, hardworking or connected. There seems to be some element of luck/grace. So many bad songs have broken the chart and much more excellent songs didn't sell a hundred.

First define your relationship. If for both of you, it is marriage, then support him. Your lack of passion for his music however is a problem that will always surface. Its obvious his music doesn't shack you.

If your relationship is just for friendship, enjoy the time you have together and don't worry about his music career.

Drew0:




Why is she ranting pointlessly?

I mean only Nigeria girl go do this kind thing, if your bf no want official work and he decides to pursue his career in music, can she not support him? Instead she is tryna frustrate him, if you can support him, gtfo!! You call him broke, her mate they buy her bf things, see AY wife na she support am when he was broke in skul days pursuing his dreams.

All this senseless Nigerian girls they disgust me with their low mentality.

What low mentality are you talking about?
She has raised valid points.
All those celebrities you see abroad, they've all being waitresses, waiters and done all sorts of odd jobs to support themselves while they pursue their dreams.
Is it not a low mentality for a grown man to still feel entitled and be begging people around to help him with money? It's not even that he's not been able to get a job, but rather he doesn't want to get one.
So who's to pay his bills? He's an adult for God's sake. Nobody owes him anything, and it's wrong for him to expect anyone to pick up his bills, even his family.
It's a different thing if his parents are wealthy, and he has a trust fund set up for him. In that case, he can always draw his living expenses from his trust fund, and concentrate solely on his passion. But he's always broke, and there's obviously no trust fund set up anywhere.
He needs to get his acts together. Those giving him money are only enabling his irresponsibility.

DozieInc:
Pls few questions.

how long has he been into music?


Does he earn from the music??


Does he have other sources of income?


Does he have concrete plan/strategy on how to promote his music to the next level?

Cos I would like to believe he is smart and purposeful and not use music as an excuse for laziness or short-sightedness.

From her story, he's not earning anything from anywhere, and not even from the music. Even if it's to be a street musician, with him playing guitar and singing on the road so those that pass by can drop him some money he's not doing that.
I personally think nobody should depend on others for their daily upkeep if it can be helped. It's a different thing if he's yet to find a job, but he's not even bothering to look for one. At least get one with flexible timing that can give you time to pursue your dreams. Even if it's special coaching and tutoring pry or sec school students at home after school.

eyinjuege:


What low mentality are you talking about?
She has raised valid points.
All those celebrities you see abroad, they've all being waitresses, waiters and done all sorts of odd jobs to support themselves while they pursue their dreams.
Is it not a low mentality for a grown man to still feel entitled and be begging people around to help him with money? It's not even that he's not been able to get a job, but rather he doesn't want to get one.
So who's to pay his bills? He's an adult for God's sake. Nobody owes him anything, and it's wrong for him to expect anyone to pick up his bills, even his family.
It's a different thing if his parents are wealthy, and he has a trust fund set up for him. In that case, he can always draw his living expenses from his trust fund, and concentrate solely on his passion. But he's always broke, and there's obviously no trust fund set up anywhere.
He needs to get his acts together. Those giving him money are only enabling his irresponsibility.

Okay I hear, she has raised valid points
S0o what does she want us to do for her boyfriend

rockstarB:
My boyfriend is a jobless upcoming artist it is annoying because it is more than a year now that he served this country, I feel like he should get a job since he is a First Class graduate but NO! He won't. He prefers to keep asking money from his sister and anyone that could help. Each time I bring up the matter of getting a job he will get kind of angry. He is so obsessed with this music that he sees no other thing. Am angry, even to sub sometimes is problem cos he is broke. I believe that music should be the second option while he works to get money at least to help his career And stop begging. I don't understand a broke guy is a frustrated person coupled with being an upcoming.
We had a fight not quite long cos he is too broke to sub for himself. I brought up the issue of getting a job and he was like "I don't have any reasonable suggestions" nonsense!

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rockstarB:
My boyfriend is a jobless upcoming artist it is annoying because it is more than a year now that he served this country, I feel like he should get a job since he is a First Class graduate but NO! He won't. He prefers to keep asking money from his sister and anyone that could help. Each time I bring up the matter of getting a job he will get kind of angry. He is so obsessed with this music that he sees no other thing. Am angry, even to sub sometimes is problem cos he is broke. I believe that music should be the second option while he works to get money at least to help his career And stop begging. I don't understand a broke guy is a frustrated person coupled with being an upcoming.
We had a fight not quite long cos he is too broke to sub for himself. I brought up the issue of getting a job and he was like "I don't have any reasonable suggestions" nonsense!

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rockstarB:
My boyfriend is a jobless upcoming artist it is annoying because it is more than a year now that he served this country, I feel like he should get a job since he is a First Class graduate but NO! He won't. He prefers to keep asking money from his sister and anyone that could help. Each time I bring up the matter of getting a job he will get kind of angry. He is so obsessed with this music that he sees no other thing. Am angry, even to sub sometimes is problem cos he is broke. I believe that music should be the second option while he works to get money at least to help his career And stop begging. I don't understand a broke guy is a frustrated person coupled with being an upcoming.
We had a fight not quite long cos he is too broke to sub for himself. I brought up the issue of getting a job and he was like "I don't have any reasonable suggestions" nonsense!

you never free this guy that only sees you as his atm

I think if you get a job yourself his mentality will change, it's because the both of you are jobless...just saying.

rockstarB:

Yes I do, but I hate to see him moody and sad over asking help instead of hustling to get a job.

Let me get this straight. Did he actually graduate with a 1st class? Do u know what it takes to graduate with a 1st class in a naija university?

Do u think he went to school, struggled so hard for the 1st class only to make himself jobless?

My point is this, this your guy is intelligent, he is only passionate about what he wants @ every point in his life, with time also, when he was in school, he was passionate to graduate with a 1st class, and he got it, I bet he didn't mix music with academics to achieve that.

Now he is in this other phase/stage in life and all he wants is to pursue his music career, and I also believe he can get what he wants.
Also he doesn't want to mix getting a job, working full time with what he is pursuing now which is his music career.

I suggest u give him some space and time to sort himself out.

He was determined to graduate with a 1st class in the university and no one stopped him from doing it, maybe because that's what the society wants ( go to school, study hard, graduate and get a job) remember it took him @least 4 good years to achieve that.

Now that he is also determined to achieve something else in his life, u are complaining, why? because u and perhaps the society @ large does not believe in his passion (that is music), he has not even spent up to 4yrs that he spent in school to achieve his 1st class in music. To him, he believes he has not put his best in that aspect, and until he does that, whatever u all are saying na trash. He can only give up on music when he thinks that he has put all his best and it didn't yield anything. Cajoling him to quit or stop now will do nothing but put him in regrets for the rest of his life and looking back to remember that u are one of those that made him quit on his dreams will make him hate u. Even if he becomes a billionaire tomorrow, he will not be satisfied because he will always think that he could have been better off if he had followed his heart.


Nevertheless, I understand your plight. I know u are concerned too. All I am saying is, give him space and support.

I believe he is smart enough to know when to quit.


Why not u getting a job instead to support him @least for a year and if he doesn't still see reasons why he should improve himself to ur own definition of improvement then u can quit, @least supporting him from your heart both financially and otherwise will limit his begging for money to sub all the time.

chigoizie7:



Let me get this straight. Did he actually graduate with a 1st class? Do u know what it takes to graduate with a 1st class in a naija university?

Do u think he went to school, struggled so hard for the 1st class only to make himself jobless?

My point is this, this your guy is intelligent, he is only passionate about what he wants @ every point in his life, with time also, when he was in school, he was passionate to graduate with a 1st class, and he got it, I bet he didn't mix music with academics to achieve that.

Now he is in this other phase/stage in life and all he wants is to pursue his music career, and I also believe he can get what he wants.
Also he doesn't want to mix getting a job, working full time with what he is pursuing now which is his music career.

I suggest u give him some space and time to sort himself out.

He was determined to graduate with a 1st class in the university and no one stopped him from doing it, maybe because that's what the society wants ( go to school, study hard, graduate and get a job) remember it took him @least 4 good years to achieve that.

Now that he is also determined to achieve something else in his life, u are complaining, why? because u and perhaps the society @ large does not believe in his passion (that is music), he has not even spent up to 4yrs that he spent in school to achieve his 1st class in music. To him, he believes he has not put his best in that aspect, and until he does that, whatever u all are saying na trash. He can only give up on music when he thinks that he has put all his best and it didn't yield anything. Cajoling him to quit or stop now will do nothing but put him in regrets for the rest of his life and looking back to remember that u are one of those that made him quit on his dreams will make him hate u. Even if he becomes a billionaire tomorrow, he will not be satisfied because he will always think that he could have been better off if he had followed his heart.


Nevertheless, I understand your plight. I know u are concerned too. All I am saying is, give him space and support.

I believe he is smart enough to know when to quit.


Why not u getting a job instead to support him @least for a year and if he doesn't still see reasons why he should improve himself to ur own definition of improvement then u can quit, @least supporting him from your heart both financially and otherwise will limit his begging for money to sub all the time.

Thank you.

If you're looking to become a musician, make sure your rent, kids and bills are taken care of first aint nothing worse than an artist that puts everything into his music and nothing into his life! Thats the fakest thing EVER!

Icansing:
first class have time for music yes, but he can look for a menial job before he gets a better one to support his dream,

..uhm

[quote author=chigoizie7 post=49032189]


Let me get this straight. Did he actually graduate with a 1st class? Do u know what it takes to graduate with a 1st class in a naija university?

Do u think he went to school, struggled so hard for the 1st class only to make himself jobless?

My point is this, this your guy is intelligent, he is only passionate about what he wants @ every point in his life, with time also, when he was in school, he was passionate to graduate with a 1st class, and he got it, I bet he didn't mix music with academics to achieve that.

Now he is in this other phase/stage in life and all he wants is to pursue his music career, and I also believe he can get what he wants.
Also he doesn't want to mix getting a job, working full time with what he is pursuing now which is his music career.

I suggest u give him some space and time to sort himself out.

He was determined to graduate with a 1st class in the university and no one stopped him from doing it, maybe because that's what the society wants ( go to school, study hard, graduate and get a job) remember it took him @least 4 good years to achieve that.

Now that he is also determined to achieve something else in his life, u are complaining, why? because u and perhaps the society @ large does not believe in his passion (that is music), he has not even spent up to 4yrs that he spent in school to achieve his 1st class in music. To him, he believes he has not put his best in that aspect, and until he does that, whatever u all are saying na trash. He can only give up on music when he thinks that he has put all his best and it didn't yield anything. Cajoling him to quit or stop now will do nothing but put him in regrets for the rest of his life and looking back to remember that u are one of those that made him quit on his dreams will make him hate u. Even if he becomes a billionaire tomorrow, he will not be satisfied because he will always think that he could have been better off if he had followed his heart.


Nevertheless, I understand your plight. I know u are concerned too. All I am saying is, give him space and support.

I believe he is smart enough to know when to quit.


Why not u getting a job instead to support him @least for a year and if he doesn't still see reasons why he should improve himself to ur own definition of improvement then u can quit, @least supporting him from your heart both financially and otherwise will limit his begging for money.boss u made a point. But he suppose to huZUTLE for his self.let music be his part.time job.if is my own family after graduated from university nobody owns u anything.(he has settled u )

vani86:
Why don't you get a job and support his passion. You never know when he will hammer, look at annie idibia

a very useless advice

eyinjuege:


What low mentality are you talking about?
She has raised valid points.
All those celebrities you see abroad, they've all being waitresses, waiters and done all sorts of odd jobs to support themselves while they pursue their dreams.
Is it not a low mentality for a grown man to still feel entitled and be begging people around to help him with money? It's not even that he's not been able to get a job, but rather he doesn't want to get one.
So who's to pay his bills? He's an adult for God's sake. Nobody owes him anything, and it's wrong for him to expect anyone to pick up his bills, even his family.
It's a different thing if his parents are wealthy, and he has a trust fund set up for him. In that case, he can always draw his living expenses from his trust fund, and concentrate solely on his passion. But he's always broke, and there's obviously no trust fund set up anywhere.
He needs to get his acts together. Those giving him money are only enabling his irresponsibility.

on point

chigoizie7:



Let me get this straight. Did he actually graduate with a 1st class? Do u know what it takes to graduate with a 1st class in a naija university?

Do u think he went to school, struggled so hard for the 1st class only to make himself jobless?

My point is this, this your guy is intelligent, he is only passionate about what he wants @ every point in his life, with time also, when he was in school, he was passionate to graduate with a 1st class, and he got it, I bet he didn't mix music with academics to achieve that.

Now he is in this other phase/stage in life and all he wants is to pursue his music career, and I also believe he can get what he wants.
Also he doesn't want to mix getting a job, working full time with what he is pursuing now which is his music career.

I suggest u give him some space and time to sort himself out.

He was determined to graduate with a 1st class in the university and no one stopped him from doing it, maybe because that's what the society wants ( go to school, study hard, graduate and get a job) remember it took him @least 4 good years to achieve that.

Now that he is also determined to achieve something else in his life, u are complaining, why? because u and perhaps the society @ large does not believe in his passion (that is music), he has not even spent up to 4yrs that he spent in school to achieve his 1st class in music. To him, he believes he has not put his best in that aspect, and until he does that, whatever u all are saying na trash. He can only give up on music when he thinks that he has put all his best and it didn't yield anything. Cajoling him to quit or stop now will do nothing but put him in regrets for the rest of his life and looking back to remember that u are one of those that made him quit on his dreams will make him hate u. Even if he becomes a billionaire tomorrow, he will not be satisfied because he will always think that he could have been better off if he had followed his heart.


Nevertheless, I understand your plight. I know u are concerned too. All I am saying is, give him space and support.

I believe he is smart enough to know when to quit.


Why not u getting a job instead to support him @least for a year and if he doesn't still see reasons why he should improve himself to ur own definition of improvement then u can quit, @least supporting him from your heart both financially and otherwise will limit his begging for money to sub all the time.

U made a point boss ,he is a man.he suppose to huztle for his own.Let music be his part time job.if is my own family after graduated from university nobody owns u anything (he has settle u)

lilmax:
a very useless advice

says the im.be.cile

although I know this tori na lie but if by chance it is true, you ought to have dumped the guy teytey. who drops a first class certi to pursue a music career?.... He doesn't know what he is doing