Hello guys,

Sometime ago, on this thread :

https://www.nairaland.com/2883246/she-chronic-liar-madness/3#42229704

..... I contributed my experience with my ex-fiancee.

Today, I just got an invite to the wedding of a friend who is a mutual friend of my ex-fiancee and I. She, the friend, told me that my ex-fiancee would be coming to the wedding also. Now here is the thing :

Recall that I had gotten a beautiful Ring of 45k with which I went down on bended knee to propose to this girl then. She'd happily accepted the Ring with tears in her eyes and kisses on my face. However, she would later go on to accept a proposal from some other dude in her base who called me one night (see story on link above).

Now, a little Gremlin on my shoulder is suggesting that I confront her, if she shows up at the upcoming wedding, and demand that she returns my Ring.

For the avoidance of doubt, this isn't about demanding the return of stuff that one bought for his ex or something infantile. The ring wasn't a gift but was supposed to be an emblem of our engagement before she blew it. Even though I'd let it go for two years, I still feel scammed sometimes as she never came clean all these years despite having been found out to be a liar although we never saw or spoke again since then. Now, I'm beginning to seriously mull over asking her about that beautiful ring of mine when we meet.

Not sure if it would make me feel any less flim-flammed, but it sure would be nice if she returned it as it could fetch me a tidy 50k plus, give or take, at the Gold merchants in my city. Hehehe.

What do you think, people? Should I confront her or not? Who has a similar experience to share?

BUHARI MUST HEAR THIS O. RING THAT U GAVE HER DURING JONATHAN TIME U WAN COLLECT FOR BABA TIME. I WISH YOU LUCK ON THAT ROAD.

u wanna give another girl a ring you used in proposing to someone else? you do know you won't sell it the same amount you bought it? just let it go mahn, she's your past and should remain there

Let me ask my Ex first. Will be back to answer thee.

I would have called you niggardly but...
Past is past, 50k ring? what of people that spent hundreds of thousands on the opposite sex and later got jilted? You would end up putting yourself in a position where you start reminiscing on the past and believe me, no good will come out of it.

Talk2Bella:
u wanna give another girl a ring you used in proposing to someone else? you do know you won't sell it the same amount you bought it? just let it go mahn, she's your past and should remain there

Lol.

Actually, it wouldn't be a bad idea if I gave the ring to another girl. In this Buhari change, it would save me from shelling out another princely sum to get another one, don't you reckon?

Forget about the ring and move on with your life.

kindredspirit:
Hello guys,

Sometime ago, on this thread :

https://www.nairaland.com/2883246/she-chronic-liar-madness/3#42229704

..... I contributed my experience with my ex-fiancee.

Today, I just got an invite to the wedding of a friend who is a mutual friend of my ex-fiancee and I. She, the friend, told me that my ex-fiancee would be coming to the wedding also. Now here is the thing :

Recall that I had gotten a beautiful Ring of 45k with which I went down on bended knee to propose to this girl then. She'd happily accepted the Ring with tears in her eyes and kisses on my face. However, she would later go on to accept a proposal from some other dude in her base who called me one night (see story on link above).

Now, a little Gremlin on my shoulder is suggesting that I confront her, if she shows up at the upcoming wedding, and demand that she returns my Ring.

For the avoidance of doubt, this isn't about demanding the return of stuff that one bought for his ex or something infantile. The ring wasn't a gift but was supposed to be an emblem of our engagement before she blew it. Even though I'd let it go for two years, I still feel scammed sometimes as she never came clean all these years despite having been found out to be a liar although we never saw or spoke again since then. Now, I'm beginning to seriously mull over asking her about that beautiful ring of mine when we meet.

Not sure if it would make me feel any less flim-flammed, but it sure would be nice if she returned it as it could fetch me a tidy 50k plus, give or take, at the Gold merchants in my city. Hehehe.

What do you think, people? Should I confront her or not? Who has a similar experience to share?

kindredspirit:


Lol.

Actually, it wouldn't be a bad idea if I gave the ring to another girl. In this Buhari change, it would save me from shelling out another princely sum to get another one, don't you reckon?

nah I don't reckon, it means you don't value your present girl, second hand things comes to mind

INTROVERT:
BUHARI MUST HEAR THIS O. RING THAT U GAVE HER DURING JONATHAN TIME U WAN COLLECT FOR BABA TIME. I WISH YOU LUCK ON THAT ROAD.

..... And what a better time to collect it !! I guess Baba's time is brining out the shrewdness in not a small number of denizens. Lol.

I wouldn't want my man to engage me with a ring he collected from his ex.

Just let go and don't make a fool of yourself

COLLECT YOUR RING BRO, simple as abcd

Obinnau:
I would have called you niggardly but...
Past is past, 50k ring? what of people that spent hundreds of thousands on the opposite sex and later got jilted? You would end up putting yourself in a position where you start reminiscing on the past and believe me, no good will come out of it.

50k or 100k plus, to each their own. But don't you just hate being the butt of a scam ? That's how I felt at that initial stage when it happened. I'd since forgotten. I guess it came to the fore again because of this Buhari change.

Your point is taken, thanks.

poshestmina:
I wouldn't want my man to engage me with a ring he collected from his ex.

Just let go and don't make a fool of yourself

But Mina, who's gonna tell my new girl that the Ring is a 'give-me-back' from my ex? I'm going to look for some pix, if I can find it. The stuff was worth its weight in Solid GOLD! My jeweller got it raw from Dubai! Very handsome stuff !

hopeforcharles:
COLLECT YOUR RING BRO, simple as abcd

Dude, you're feeling me, right? A girl collects a Ring from a guy, two weeks later she collects from another guy!

Lol. But what good would come out of the confrontation? I'm sure she must have sold the ring since!!

You shoulda collected it when u broke up, now I feel its too late

kindredspirit:


But Mina, who's gonna tell my new girl that the Ring is a 'give-me-back' from my ex? I'm going to look for some pix, if I can find it. The stuff was worth its weight in Solid GOLD! My jeweller got it raw from Dubai! Very handsome stuff !

Hope she married that guy that spoilt your relationship with her... Forget about d ring, you are above that.

Section8:
You shoulda collected it when u broke up, now I feel its too late

Maybe I should have, if she hadn't done the Houdini on me. We live in different cities.

I proposed to her on the 6th of October, somebody else proposed to her on the 13th, I later found out. The story is on the link in my OP. Check it out for full details.

Yes, it might be too late. She'd most def have disposed of the ring for monetary consideration by now.

How about I confirm that by asking her when we meet?

kindredspirit:


Maybe I should have, if she hadn't done the Houdini on me. We live in different cities.

I proposed to her on the 6th of October, somebody else proposed to her on the 13th, I later found out. The story is on the link in my OP. Check it out for full details.

Yes, it might be too late. She'd most def have disposed of the ring for monetary consideration by now.

How about I confirm that by asking her when we meet?

You can try but after reading ur preemptive thread I can bet ure not getting that ring back

Let it go jare

op plz just let go of the ring... she is ur past now I know you feel angry and would want it back but since you did not ask for d ring when she accepted the proposal of another dude just let it go (it's shows maturity) besides it won't be fair to your new lady to propose to her with the same ring you used for your ex

nma24:
Hope she married that guy that spoilt your relationship with her... Forget about d ring, you are above that.

If you read the story on my post, you would discover where I asked her to fess up so we could just split amicably. I told her then that it wasn't compulsory that we marry, the girl denied and even wept that it was all lies.

The guy didn't spoil the relationship. It was a good thing that it happened as I've long moved on.

I'm not driven by revenge. I just thought it wouldn't be bad to get the Ring so I can pawn it. Maybe my hustle for cash is getting the better of me.

Pls, do collect the ring back from her.
As you rightly stated, the ring was a symbol of love now that you are apart. You have all right to request for the ring.
If you request for the ring and she doesnt give you, don't bother asking again!!

kindredspirit:


Dude, you're feeling me, right? A girl collects a Ring from a guy, two weeks later she collects from another guy!

Lol. But what good would come out of the confrontation? I'm sure she must have sold the ring since!!

If she has sold it she must refund me, she is wicked, this wickedness, she must refund oh

Let it go bro.She is in the past now.

Though painful,but you need move on.

hopeforcharles:

If she has sold it she must refund me, she is wicked, this wickedness, she must refund oh

My bro! How do you suggest I MAKE her refund money if she's sold the ring? Should I cause a public scene? Don't forget I'll be meeting her at a wedding ceremony this weekend.

Any leads?

Dinocarex:
Pls, do collect the ring back from her.
As you rightly stated, the ring was a symbol of love now that you are apart. You have all right to request for the ring.
If you request for the ring and she doesnt give you, don't bother asking again!!

Exactly bro! Respect! You're DEEP ! The symbolism of an engagement Ring to some people is very strong! Can it be waved away wily-nilly without implications? This is going to form part of my contemplations as I decide what to do.

But you're right. If she dosent give me, in the event that I elect to ask her, I guess I'd have to let it go.

Are you sure the person who invited you isn't trying to reconcile you guys on the girls request?

kindredspirit:
Hello guys,

Sometime ago, on this thread :

https://www.nairaland.com/2883246/she-chronic-liar-madness/3#42229704

..... I contributed my experience with my ex-fiancee.

Today, I just got an invite to the wedding of a friend who is a mutual friend of my ex-fiancee and I. She, the friend, told me that my ex-fiancee would be coming to the wedding also. Now here is the thing :

Recall that I had gotten a beautiful Ring of 45k with which I went down on bended knee to propose to this girl then. She'd happily accepted the Ring with tears in her eyes and kisses on my face. However, she would later go on to accept a proposal from some other dude in her base who called me one night (see story on link above).

Now, a little Gremlin on my shoulder is suggesting that I confront her, if she shows up at the upcoming wedding, and demand that she returns my Ring.

For the avoidance of doubt, this isn't about demanding the return of stuff that one bought for his ex or something infantile. The ring wasn't a gift but was supposed to be an emblem of our engagement before she blew it. Even though I'd let it go for two years, I still feel scammed sometimes as she never came clean all these years despite having been found out to be a liar although we never saw or spoke again since then. Now, I'm beginning to seriously mull over asking her about that beautiful ring of mine when we meet.

Not sure if it would make me feel any less flim-flammed, but it sure would be nice if she returned it as it could fetch me a tidy 50k plus, give or take, at the Gold merchants in my city. Hehehe.

What do you think, people? Should I confront her or not? Who has a similar experience to share?

are you for real, like seriously you want to ask her for the engagement ring, it will only make you look like you have not moved on and still wants her in your life.

my advice, make sure you look really stunning that day and go with a very sexy lady that will make heads turn( if you like you fit borrow person babe wey fine die )...

Julietcutie:
op plz just let go of the ring... she is ur past now I know you feel angry and would want it back but since you did not ask for d ring when she accepted the proposal of another dude just let it go (it's shows maturity) besides it won't be fair to your new lady to propose to her with the same ring you used for your ex

Julie, I don't feel angry one bit, trust me. I was more or less saved by the bell that the relationship went awry. How would I have coped with a girl that lied so glibly as a wife?

You should read that link that I put in my original post. The reason why I contributed to that thread then was to let people know how barefaced liars could be even after they'd been found out.

I didn't know she was engaged to some other guy until much later when the guy called me to tell me both of them were engaged. I confronted her and she denied. When she returned back to her base, we never saw again hence I didn't / couldn't ask her about my ring.

About giving the ring to a new lady.. Lol! Who's going to tell her that " this ring was the ring that I proposed to an ex with "!? Not me, certainly! But Yes, your right though. The Ring is tainted, so I'm not putting it on the finger of another lady. It could be under some certain hex.

So, to my Gold Merchants, that's where I'm looking at flogging it for cash!

Thanks for your insight. Much appreciated.

You should have asked her to return your ring when you broke up




But you said it's 2 years so I think you should let it go

234GT:
Are you sure the person who invited you isn't trying to reconcile you guys on the girls request?

Wow! Now, that's a thought! I never thought in that direction. I don't think my ex told this person what transpired between us: how she got a Ring from me and went ahead to with another guy.

But your point makes sense, albeit unlikely. But anything is possible, so we'll see. I'll update the thread on Saturday after the wedding. Watch this space!

schumastic:


are you for real, like seriously you want to ask her for the engagement ring, it will only make you look like you have not moved on and still wants her in your life.

my advice, make sure you look really stunning that day and go with a very sexy lady that will make heads turn( if you like you fit borrow person babe wey fine die )...

, Nice one. But I'm not going to overly dress to impress or turn out in my Sunday best just because I'd be meeting my ex again. And I'm not going to rent a lady just to wave in my exs face. I'm a head turner, in my own right, a dapper gentleman, even if I do say so myself.

You're right though. My asking about the ring would tend to suggest I'm still hung up on things after all years. Question is : what do I have to lose? I'm not trying to win her affections. So, it might not matter if she thinks I'm not over her, if that's going to help me get the Ring.