My thread is to buttress @Vick4rill's thread on why No Christians Should Consider Marrying an Atheist. Maybe Atheist like @Aaronson, @HopefulLandlord, @SonofLucifer, @EyeHateGod and others see the logic in the thread if I give my own personal experience. 

My Personal Experience: 
I once Loved a Lady who happened was not really an Atheist or Agnostics. Said she is a Moralist. She didn't like my Faith as a Christian. We were together for eight months. One month into our introduction and 3months to our planned wedding the whole  relationship crashed because it can't just work except in very slim and rare occasion (and in that rare occasion the signs will show from the beginning that you guys are meant to be). I saw the problem second months into our relationship and wanted us to talk about it there and then to know if to stop or still give it a shot. At that point we had a bottle neck cos she can't see what I was seeing and was not interested in talking about it. In short I was forced by her (inadvertently though) to continue with the relationship for another six months because we said we were in love (which is all we needed). I believe in Love (which my Bible defined as God). When Love is at play everything else give way even Rules, Order, Judgment /Justice or Revenge. But the question is were we really in Love? I don't think so. Because of our foundation we don't have the same perspective to Love basically because we don't have the same training about life or experiences or exposure. 

See the problem: I define Love based on how I have been taught from home and the church: I corinthians 13:4-7: Love endures, is Kind, does not envy, is not proud, does not seek his own good, is not easily provoked, does act rudely etc... 
To her Love and Sensuality are synonymous - something close to s3x.
For me Love is broader & expected to reflect in how I interact with not only my immediate family but also total strangers. So I can talk about Love without including S3x. But for her on that subject, the first thing that comes to mind is S3x. This is quite understandable because she watch movies a lot and that is image she sees. So on that note we had problem flowing. 

The problem I saw about us in the second month was that she is a strong and opionated person. Meaning she is more like a choleric and will likely be goal oriented and dominating. Now this is not a problem because it's a personality type. However, we are two people living by different beliefs and principles. If conflict of interest arises in the relationship and we want to resolve it whose principles are we going to go by. I won't be able to veto decision or I will be seen as autocratic & inconsiderate. Yet I have someone who wants to win always. That made me take a deep thought and I had to ask her how she feels about DIVORCE. First she reacted negatively and angrily like why am I asking about Divorce? That are we married, do we need to talk about Divorce and that point? She said she does not have opinion as of then. But I insisted I just needed to know her definition. She said it and I was like no now I can't do this with you...
Her Definition - Divorce is a legal solution to a bad deal of marriage. 
To her Divorce is a Solution but to me it's a problem. Even though it may be the only option left and in the best interest of the parties involved, it does not change the fact that it is a problem. 
I wentt further to ask what a bad marriage bad to her means. Does that  mean a man cheating on her or not providing for her or someone who is abusive etc? She was like she does know. She is not in the future hence she can not tell what bad marriage can be. 

I looked at those statements and I was like this is a Set up really. I am going to get involved with someone who does not believe in my lifestyles and who have the higher power (bargaining power). I will do everything to keep the relationship and she doesn't really care if it crashes. If things are not looking very favorable she can leave at the slightest provocation. If we don't agree with each other on how to train our kids, I better agree with her or else she will dump my ass over flimsy excuses such as IRRECONCILABLE  DIFFERENCES. 

I looked at it further, it easy for her to enter and leave a relationship because of her believe. She wants to be Happy. So if you guys are not agreeing with each other hence you get into quarrel mode not because you stopped loving each other but because you got to settle a matter, she stopped being happy and immediately threatens the relationship. To her there is nothing about Love that talks about Endurances, Joy (Happiness from within not on circumstances) and Responsibility to your spouse, children and society at large. To her Love must make you happy and indulge you. If it does not do that to you walk away regardless of who you leaving behind. That's Selfishness. 

Mind you we liked each other and did many wonderful stuffs for each other. I liked her firm qualities, eye for quality and cheerful personality. But unfortunately this things can't stand when pressure of live comes. We can't even agree from the outset that this is the result and values we are seeking in the relationship. Marriage is a STRATEGIC DECISION and every discrete person knows that decision on Strategic alliances should not be taken lightly. It is just wise to limit the risk of failing. Is not about the individuals per se but about getting the most out of life. 

I can give several personal scenario that shows how impracticable it is to have a fulfilled marriage where the parties are sticking to their believes. That marriage will be endure and not enjoyed. It will crate lots of tension, conflicts, complications, inconvenience etc. I will give Ten Reason from my personal experience in my next thread.

She is acting accordingly to Nature and besides when did Atheist, Agnostic or Moralist becomes a Faith?

EyeHateGod:
She is acting accordingly to Nature and besides when did Atheist, Agnostic or Moralist becomes a Faith?

The Op is right. Marriage is a lifetime commitment that no one should allow sentiments to becloud his/her judgement unless the person want to have a disjointed home.

hmmmm

EyeHateGod:
She is acting accordingly to Nature and besides when did Atheist, Agnostic or Moralist becomes a Faith?

It is bro. We all belong to one faith or the other. Faith is Shared belief system that is passed down to us. There is a template for people in each group that shapes their reasoning, perspective, priority etc that make most people in each group sound or act alike. Please not the following:


First and Foremost, I am a christian and my responsibility as demanded by my Lord and Saviour is to Love people regardless of their belief system. So my focus is usually on friendship and not judging how correctly or not people's lifestyle are. Just as I won't listen to any stranger (whether Atheist, Moralist/Free moral agents, Agnostic, Scientist etc) with grandstanding views about how poor and illogical my faith is, I don't expect people from other believe system to jump on whatever I tell them about my faith. The truth here is no one can beat experience. So if I keep preaching I am just wasting my time - the best I can get is vain argument that leads to no where. But maybe I can try to influence (not trying to change the person) the person's disposition through friendship.

Secondly, I am a Core Christians and I know what we mean when we say Someone is a Christian. Christians means Christ-Like: People who live their lives following christ foot-print. Before you jump on this statement, let me quickly say that I have listened to a lot of people who have problem with christianity (esp the Atheist, Moralist and Scientist) and a common denominator in their argument is that Religious people don't have a mind of their own blablabla!!! Most times, my question is usually, "Do we have anybody in this life who is not a product of somebody else?" I don't think my friends from the other side really consider this argument very well before you using it against Christians and other devoted people. The point is we all came into this world empty - with no knowledge, understanding, facts or points to back up our arguments, actions and lifestyle. Everything we know and use are handed to us by people before us and we too will try to influence people behind us to buy into our perspective to life. So whether we all admit it or not, we all practice a believe system/faith or the other. We are social beings and tend to align into groups based on reasoning and perspective to life which didn't come naturally or automatically (it was learnt from other people). So as Christians for instance we learn in church using the bible, other believe systems learn through other mediums - movies/music, beer parlour, school etc. It's a process we call SOCIALIZATION in SOCIOLOGY. Sociology identify five major agents of Socialization to be Family, School, Peer Group, Mass media and Religious Centres. So whether we admit or not, whether our faith requires being devoted or not we all derived how we think, feel and act from these five institution. So next time when you say Christians are gullible, unscientific, illogical, puppets or zombies etc I will like you to prove to me how you are not. How you believed all you are told about science without making personal verification. Of cos you will say you did lab test. My question is how many of these test did you carry out yourself? Did you go to the moon or the sun to determine if the sizes as posited by science is actually true. You just did some test and believe the rest - so everyone is a believer in something, case closed. Christians believe in Christ, Muslims in Mohammed, Atheist in No God, Scientist in Science....and so on. So I prefer not to argue because everyone has chosen his/her path according to what he/she is comfortable with. People who cross into other faith to find love only bring in some level of discomfort and conflict into their lives. Not that it can not work at all at all but the chances are very slim, near zero.

Furthermore, many non Christians interprets christian person as that religious and fanatic person around them. If we go by the definition of being Christ-like, the question you would like to ask is based on the records in the bible was christ religious, fanatic or judgmental...the ans is capital No. He had serious problems with fanatism, religiosity, legalism with people of his days (esp the Pharisees, Sadducees and Scribes - the people teaching about God in his day). That is where the word Hypocrites came from. People who say but don't Do. He focuses his attention on What People Do and Not what they say. Anybody can claim to be a christian. So people go to church to socialize or get business. Some journalist for to get reports some to chase girls etc. Christ says by their Fruits you will know them. So we have Nominal and Real Christians or Christians by Mouth and by Heart. You will hardly find a Real Christians in Love with people who does not buy into his/her faith.

Harmony10:


It is bro. We all belong to one faith or the other. Faith is Shared belief system that is passed down to us. There is a template for people in each group that shapes their reasoning, perspective, priority etc that make most people in each group sound or act alike. Please not the following:

Am sorry Atheist Don't belong to Any faith and it's Quite amazing u don't know this and claim to date a Moralist? why don't u find out more about Her idealogy?

Am sorry to say this the Rest of the thing u posted just shows how ignorant u are On Science! or what Atheism is Really about

EyeHateGod:

Am sorry Atheist Don't belong to Any faith and it's Quite amazing u don't know this and claim to date a Moralist? why don't i find out more about Her idealogy?

Do you know what is called Self-Denial. Watch out bro you may be in that Webb!!! Some people are shaping your reasoning without you knowing. That is Faith/Belief bro. If you start another Faith you will try to bring in people orelse you will be a lone ranger or social outcast. By admitting that you belong to a group means there is a yardstick for spotting your type. That's Faith bro. It's belief system. It's doesn't have to be done the christian way that believe in an Invisible God

EyeHateGod:
Am sorry to say this the Rest of the thing u posted just shows how ignorant u are On Science! or what Atheism is Really about

Bro I will agree with you if you can prove to me that you didn't need faith to believe in science. How did you as a person agree to size of the moon or the earth as posited by science. Did you go to the space to measure them yourself so you can agree with them that it is true.

Harmony10:


Bro I will agree with you if you can prove to me that you didn't need faith to believe in science. How did you as a person agree to size of the moon or the earth as posited by science. Did you go to the space to measure them yourself so you can agree with them that it is true.

Like i said u have no idea how Science/scientific method works pls when u learn all this things then we can talk i wount blame u our educational system is f**cked up

Harmony10:


Do you know what is called Self-Denial. Watch out bro you may be in that Webb!!! Some people are shaping your reasoning without you knowing. That is Faith/Belief bro. If you start another Faith you will try to bring in people orelse you will be a lone ranger or social outcast. By admitting that you belong to a group means there is a yardstick for spotting your type. That's Faith bro. It's belief system. It's doesn't have to be done the christian way that believe in an Invisible God

U have little understanding on this things and that is ur problem u never try to find out about ur girls idealogy all u think about is U U U and U that's selfishness bro

EyeHateGod:

U have little understanding on this things and that is ur problem u never try to find out about ur girls idealogy all u think about is U U U and U that's selfishness bro

You taking me on. Bring it on. I don't mind. But I have asked you questions you refused to answer. Talking about selfishness... you just made a hasty conclusion which is not scientific in any way. You can make such conclusion in logic except you have sufficient info as premises.

Now let me give you more info. The second month I saw her strong personality I felt it was a caution sign. I contacted and told her we need to do an expose of what is all about us as individuals. If you care to see it, I can snap our chat to you.

She said we don't have to behave like we are doing exams. She does not like an uptite relationship. She like some form of spontaneity. I said it's not bad what she said but I am seeing things we should talk about. Now at this point we had we had conflict - who idea are we going to pick. We ended up doing her wish because instead of talking we were fighting. So I agreed let me learn what you style will bring. For the next six month we ran the relationship the way she wanted. No talking, No agreement. The spontaneity she voted for didn't help us to agree on anything or get to know each other better. Everything was assumed. When I saw that if we continued like that it's going to be her relationship alone and not our relationship came brought out my own again and became more forceful. She got angry, we had arguments and we parted never to try something like that again. She didn't even realize how much sacrifice I was making to sustain us for the next 6months. So forget about the idea of being selfish. I was over selfless. If she was christian lady I won't do more than that two months because I will use points she can relate with. But for her she can't even grasp my points. So do I keep tolerating someone who derail discussion into fight and scuttle efforts to make things work. Bros it's a Risky Life

EyeHateGod:

Like i said u have no idea how Science/scientific method works pls when u learn all this things then we can talk i wount blame u our educational system is f**cked up

Guy you are dodging and running. Scientist argue with facts and points not deflect issues. There is a question you refuse to answer. I would others who feel Christians are unscientific to help you out. How did you verify the size the moon yourself if not that you exercised faith and belief in what the scientist found out and pass down to you.

Harmony10:


Guy you are dodging and running. Scientist argue with facts and points not deflect issues. There is a question you refuse to answer. I would others who feel Christians are unscientific to help you out. How did you verify the size the moon yourself if not that you exercised faith and belief in what the scientist found out and pass down to you.

By by i don't have time for this

EyeHateGod:
Am sorry to say this the Rest of the thing u posted just shows how ignorant u are On Science! or what Atheism is Really about

my problem with this fellow, is that he always results to insults to potrayed his points. harmony10 thank you very much for this thread. it goes a long way to show that there are people who understand the point am trying to make. you see, i dont care if atheist agreed with our points or not, what matters is that as far as we are able to convince and save that sister or brother, who is intending yoking themselves in "chains" by marrying an atheist, then the mission is accomplished.

Vick4rill:
my problem with this fellow, is that he always results to insults to potrayed his points. harmony10 thank you very much for this thread. it goes a long way to show that there are people who understand the point am trying to make. you see, i dont care if atheist agreed with our points or not, what matters is that as far as we are able to convince and save that sister or brother, who is intending yoking themselves in "chains" by marrying an atheist, then the mission is accomplished.

Well done bro...You have done well. It's good to help each make sound decision. And there is no need to be apologetic concerning ones believe. God will help everyone find Love.