Here’s the worse news: Feeling stressed can mean trouble for relationships, as more and more research points to the toxic effect stress can have on our personal lives.

But don’t worry, just because your anxiety is at an all-time high, doesn’t mean your love life is doomed. Using a few proven strategies, you can learn to spot the signs that stress is negatively impacting your relationship and take steps to prevent (or at least mitigate) its harm. Take a deep breath, relax, and read on.


How to Tell If Stress Is Killing Your Mojo

Whether it’s caused by work or health problems, stress can negatively affect relationships in a variety of ways. One study that followed 80 couples over four years found that those who experienced more stress outside of their relationship reported feeling less comfortable and less close with their partner. They also felt less sure of the relationship than folks who experienced less stress.

Signs of stress may vary between individuals and among partners — but it’s never an excuse for abusive behavior (if you’re a victim, please reach out for help. However, if you feel you’re in a healthy relationship, these five signs by dailyburn might indicate that stress is taking a toll on your personal life.

1. You’re super irritable.
If you perceive everything your partner says as a slight or get miffed extra easily, stress may be a factor. The longer stress lasts, the more likely we are to feel grumpy or argumentative and lash out.

2. Your communication skills go down the tube.
When you’re feeling chronically stressed or overwhelmed, your ability to practice positive communication (i.e., to talk about who’s doing laundry without it turning into a blowout fight) actually declines. That’s because stress can prevent your ability to focus and promote negative thinking. It can also impair cognition, judgment and listening skills, according to Dr. Michael Mantell, Ph.D., an Advanced Behavior Coach.

3. You’re viewing your whole relationship as a flop.
When we’re chronically stressed, we’re more likely to perceive even the best relationship in a negative light. We’re also unlikely to realize that stress is factoring into that perception.

4. Your eyes are wandering.
Research shows we’re more likely to feel attracted to other people when feeling taxed. Anxiety can make us fantasize about being with a different partner and pay less positive attention to the one we already have.

5. You’re glued to your phone.
When we’re under pressure, it can be difficult to step away from email and texts. In one study, people who reported more “technoference” in their relationship also perceived more conflict and depressive symptoms and lower relationship satisfaction overall. That means talking on your phone during dinner with your partner can be both a sign of stress and a cause of it.



Remedies

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