After God fear women...

Hmmmm, so many touching stories, it is such a pity depression is treated with kids gloves in our society, so many people roam the street with huge burdens in their hearts, no one to talk to or confide in.
The pain grows daily and becomes unbearable, ultimately, they succumb to that crazy thought,

'Just end it! Just end it and be free'

I have been there, but I thank God I am free today.
There was a point in my life,all I did was cry,cry and cry, thoughts of death plagued me but I kept telling myself I WILL NOT DIE!

My kids suffered, I was so angry with them,especially my first son,I beat him mercilessly,I hated him,everytime I hit him, I felt so bad,then one day,he wrote me a letter saying everybody hates him especially his mom(me),my heart broke to pieces and I hated myself,it was then I decided I won't live like that anymore.
The thought of my kids drove me on,gave me the zeal to fight and become a better person,I fought and I conquered, it wasn't easy but God gave me victory.

I was even asked to take antidepressants but I refused,choosing instead to fight it,I told myself I needed to stay alive for my kids,if not for anything, to show my son that I loved him dearly, somehow I found an outlet,writing!

Whenever I write I feel relieved,that was how the healing process began,today my sons and I are best of friends.

I remember the day I apologised to my sons for treating them badly,my first son looked me in the eyes and said
"Mommy Irene,I know you were angry that time,you are the best mom in the world"

For as long as I live, I will NEVER forget those words, they are my driving force,I strive to continually be the best mom in the world.

To all those suffering from depression, hang in there,never ever take your life,see a doctor, talk to a friend,fight,never give up,life is truly beautiful.
You will overcome

And to the family of the depressed,all they need is your love and support.

Peace

lifeexperience:
Don't wanna reveal my real identity here because I am well known here. So have to use a fresh account.

After the whole scenario and saga of the Dr. Oji Alllwell who took his life by jumping from 3rd mainland bridge, I had known and come to notice that life isn't all about money and riches. Who would have thought that a young man of his age who is a Medical Doctor, own an SUV and a driver and might be living in a very comfortable house will commit suicide.

The whole internet was full with sympathy to the family, insults to the young man and many felt why will a young man who is a Medical Doctor and living comfortably will commit suicide. But the truth about it is if you haven't suffered depression, false accusation and so many challenges in life you will think life is all about comfort, roses and possession of wealth.

My sad life and experience.

Sometime early last three year, 5th of Feb 2014 to be precise. I was falsely accused of something I do not know anything about to the extent I was blackmailed and filmed on another scenario to make the accusation look solid. The accuser accused me of trying to rape her who was my highly respected leader's wife and this was arranged by her and her friend.

To cut the story short, I have a man I once called my leader who is highly influential both in business and politics and he really loved me and took me as his son. I even had a room in his house. But the wife never liked me because she had once asked me to have sex with her which I blatantly rejected and kept it secret within me. But her mind kept judging her that I might leak out this secret one day which I will never even do because I am the secretive type and nobody might believe me because of her innocent lifestyle. But she quickly played a smart one on me.

From how the whole film started. One morning she called me from my room (in the guest house) to come and help her fix something in her room. I was still with my night wear and went to her room straight with it. As I got there, she told me to remove my shirt that I will be climbing her closet to help her nail something. I did exactly as she instructed not knowing she have her own motives. After climbing the closet there was nothing there to nail and I told her everything is intact. She said she was hearing some noise so she thought maybe their was some loose somewhere. As I came down, she filmed me unknowingly with her phone as I was trying to wear my clothes. That was how everything started.

She connived with her friend and they both lied against me saying I once asked her out too. I denied everything and her husband believed me at some point because he knew right from time the woman never liked me but didn't show full support of me because of the wife. My family and few of my friends were all with me at that point and they knew I can never do that not even with a married woman. She insisted that she will provide video clip for more prove and I was first to say she should do so, not knowing of what she have done earlier and edited some part of the video.

The whole story changed when she provided that video clip. The husband, my girlfriend, my family (father, mother, siblings and infact every of my extended family), friends and the whole world deserted me and I was even cursed by my parents for making them look stupid for earlier supporting me. I was left alone in this whole world, I was sacked because "my leader" has a very high stake where I work and was thrown inside the cell for 3 weeks until the man instructed for my release and never to come close to his fence again.

After I came out, I felt like the ground should swallow me, I was rejected by everybody including my parents (though my mother stood by me as her son but never believed anything I was saying). At this point I felt depressed, I asked myself what's the need of living in this life when everybody is against me on what I never did. Nobody to even listen to me anymore because everybody was hiding their wife and girlfriends away from me (funny world) and describing me as rapist. Do you know what it takes to be wrongly accused of what you don't even know anything about and been backed up with convincing evidence?

From that point I knew this life is of two phases. A once happy man now became the saddest man on earth. At some point I ran into cars on motion but accidents are always averted, bought Rat killer and some poison on three occasions but anytime I wanna take my life, one spirit come and says stand and defend yourself one day you must surely triumph and the world will believe you and another mind will say no need because that time will never come. But I am very happy today that I was able to mend my life through that phase. Though I still pass through depression sometime but I am being able to manage my life and open up my own business to be a boss of my own because of the stigma it brought to me. I am doing very well in my business (small company) today and don't even have any single friend because I fill their is no need for that when I couldn't even get one by my side during the bad times. Same goes to girls because I see them as Lucifer (sorry to use this word) and don't think that mindset will ever make me to marry. To my family they said I should come for forgiveness which I did on what I never committed (Oh Lord). Today I am living a lonely life all alone with no friends, don't mingle with neighbours, hardly communicate with families and some point even I doubt if God exist because he saw me pass through what I knew nothing about and just kept mute up till this day. The only friend I had and still have is the web and internet which I fall to anytime I feel like.

But sometime life isn't what you see on someone physically. If you have suffered depression and have been in some situation people go through in life you will never judge people for somethings they do or what they pass through. Who will be thinking of wealth when you are be confronted with false accusation and passing through depression. If it was pushed further I would have served a jail term for what I don't know. Probably still inside jail by now.

Your prayer should be one day you should never experience depression. Though I don't support suicide and will never support it. If I have my way I will open up a rehab or something where people can go have time when they are depressed or lonely. Set it up like form of vacation ground where you meet with nice people who will be employed to treat you nice and make you feel people still love you despite if the rest of the world hate you. Life isn't all about the roses but about how you can manage the bad time when it hits you.

Sorry for the long writing and grammatical blunders.

I can't just believe that I cried after reading your story. what a wicked world. MAY God give you the heart to forgive. please you need friends no matter what.

TruthisGOD:
Well am a practical guy, I don't think there is anything that can make me commit suicide when God has blessed me with three basic things in life. Besides, I strongly believe in His words. That will certainly put me on check.

hmmm


just pray u dnt see wat job saw.

Sanchez01:

Don't misinform people, please. Depression is not a MENTAL SICKNESS but a mood disorder, often caused by a state of low feeling/mood.

Depression is not as bad as you paint it to be. As a matter of fact, we have all experienced depression at some point in our lives. That many don't know they are depressed is because the level of depression is not so great to make such person take drastic measures.

There are degree of depression. The greater they are, the more devastating the affected would act. The ultimate thought of great depressions is suicide, and not every depressed being would consider suicide. Some prefer being left alone to think and cry for some time.

What reinforces depression are, but not limited to;
1. Lack of trust.
2. Inability to talk to people.
3. Being castigated when one is down.

Again, depression is not a mental disorder. While there is a fine thin line between mental health and depression, I would be quick to state that they are not in any way the same.

From the medical perspective....it is a mental illness or mental disorder... think u should visit a psychiatric hospital and u will realise that depression is real and people are hospitalised from it. Depression is a form of mental illness

Kudos OP.
I salute your courage to forge ahead even when you hit the lowest low. Cos really no matter how hopeless ones predicament, tomorrow might just surprise you with a beautiful turn of events.

Depression can set in when we let our guard down.
Just have to realize that the big loss or disappointment is not the end of us and it helps to be in the circle of people, even if it's strangers to distract us from ourselves and give us the opportunity to address and solve the cause of the depression.

Depression often severes ones ability to trust again and build relationships in the future having been let down and disappointed by friends and family but truth is no man really is an island. So OP, try to let your wall down and don't let the shadows of past disappointments deprive you of beauty of your present future.

You're an inspiration. Keep Forging Ahead. It couldn't kill you, it made you Stronger.
Tell Death, Not Today!

ekanDamie:
tonye barcanister, is that u?

So because d op said he is popular u thought he is Tonyebarcanister? Tonye has friends n gf.





The op is thesame person as Leopantro.
Read comments from the first news and u wil knw he is the one

cameroncucumber:


So because d op said he is popular u thought he is Tonyebarcanister? Tonye has friends n gf.





The op is thesame person as Leopantro.
Read comments from the first news and u wil knw he is the one

that's not me. I only have one moniker on NL

stubornnn:


I think you should create a thread about it anytime soon. You can also create a new moniker so as to remain anonymous.

I am sure a lot of nairalanders will like to be of help, or offer advice or experience you can learn from. Please don't just live through it, try and do something about it.

Do you know there are numerous pharmaceutical drugs that can be used to treat severe depression?

Thanks a lot

false accusation is a really big burden on the accused. you keep wondering and asking yourself many questions. you loose trust in people completely. no matter what, suicide is not a solution to a problem.