I am writing this to seek advice from Nairalanders ,

There is a girl i paid for her bride price and i went back abroad to prepare her documents to join me, due to Immigration issues her papers is not yet out,

First I did her passport and it was stolen when the processing agent hard an accident , and he told me and refunded the money i gave.
after struggling , i had to leave my business and other things to relocate to a country where she can come easly so that i will be able to take her along to where i based,

She did another passport and it happened that issues came up at the Embassy due to issue of Human trafficking that was invloved with some Nigerian syndicates and Nigerians was stopped at the momment for visa issuance and a tight measures was introduced, which i have not been able to meet up now.

She keeps nagging at me about her stay in Nigeria and how people are talking about her that she married and could not stay with her husband, alot stories.

We talked as love ones before she changed to be nagging. Though my parents warned me against getting married to her and i did not listen.
I got a part time job recently and I am waiting for full time job in 2 months time.

She never cares about how i live or how i suffer to get money, which i always send to her whenever there is money in my hands. She tells people that i do not care for her which are lies, She listens to her friends more than me. Whatever i said to her she finds it offensive . All she want is to travel abroad .

I am honest to her as an Evangelist that i am, I focued on my Job which God gave me, and I have also started building my Duplex because of her so that she will not live in our family house. Because i dont want issues as my brothers are all married and have children.

Recently she have stopped calling me and i never called her because she always want me to plead with her all the time we have issues. This time around i have not called her for the past one month now.

Should i leave her and get another woman who should know when a man is having some challenges or not. Since i meet her i have been having issues with my family members all because of her.

Honestly as am writing , am very faithful and willing to care for her but she is using her visa issue as a yardstick that i dont care for her, which am not responsible for her visa issues cause money is not the problem of her visa.

I have found out that whenever a lady I like is giving me problem like yours, it is always affecting my day to day activities. That is,i will become unhappy and unable to carryout my task.But immediately I decide to moved on with my life,i will totally become a happy person.Ladies as such should be done with.

Lemme ask you a very simple question before you take that decision.



"If a healthy tse-tse fly lands in your scrotum, are you going to chase that tse-tse fly with a sharp cutlass?

a month? and she neva cal? abeg leave her

CplusJason:
Lemme ask you a very simple question before you take that decision.



"If a healthy tse-tse fly lands in your scrotum, are you going to chase that tse-tse fly with a sharp cutlass?

my issue now is the bride price i paid before all these issues came up

Flashmove:



my issue now is the bride price i paid before all these issues came up

Don't let that be an issue. Try and settle things out with her bro.


"I nor gree, I nor gree, naim dey tear pant"

Why didn't u marry a foreign woman there.. Damnit

Hmmm.... Do all you can to take her abroad and you might totally lost control over her.

dingbang:
Why didn't u marry a foreign woman there.. Damnit

Abroad women is not in my agenda, Most of Nigerians that married them count loses , I believe that Nigerian women are still the best compared to what i have seen on other Black vs white marriages ...

Many factors,

They wont like to settle in Nigeria forever with you.
No culture
You cant dream to get your children
You will spend your entire years abroad cause you want to to stay near her
They can easily betray you for a pot of porridge
They live life on debts
They can divorce you when you needed them the most
They will control you like a television
Many issue i cant count.....

For me white lady is not suitable for some Nigerian Men

Flashmove:


Abroad women is not in my agenda, Most of Nigerians that married them count loses , I believe that Nigerian women are still the best compared to what i have seen on other Black vs white marriages ...

Many factors,

They wont like to settle in Nigeria forever with you.
No culture
You cant dream to get your children
You will spend your entire years abroad cause you want to to stay near her
They can easily betray you for a pot of porridge
They live life on debts
They can divorce you when you needed them the most
They will control you like a television
Many issue i cant count.....

For me white lady is not suitable for some Nigerian Men

I never limited the woman to be white.. I mentioned foreign so it includes other nationalities ... Kenyans. South Africans, Tanzanians.. Etc.. I wonder why we just run back to Nigeria when we need a wife..

If I can't find a woman good enough for me in this country, it wouldn't take me a nanosecond to look elsewhere in another territory

dingbang:
I never limited the woman to be white.. I mentioned foreign so it includes other nationalities ... Kenyans. South Africans, Tanzanians.. Etc.. I wonder why we just run back to Nigeria when we need a wife..

If I can't find a woman good enough for me in this country, it wouldn't take me a nanosecond to look elsewhere in another territory

I understood your option : I have been Abroad for 10 years now, I have seen many nationalites and their attributes, I still believe that as a Nigerian, That a Nigerian Woman should be the best option.......

(Need to live a live of my late Father and Mother ... So sweet)...Never fight, Never quarrels, Never Nags, ......

Any woman that is not a Nigerian is not in my profile.

I believe we have good Nigerians who will make a sweet home.

What am avoiding is quarrel because it affects my spiritual life and brings backwardness to everything i do..

I don't believe this story at all, u building a duplex on a part time job & equally hopping on a full time job ,u are still the same person complaining of financial challenges.

CplusJason:
Lemme ask you a very simple question before you take that decision.



"If a healthy tse-tse fly lands in your scrotum, are you going to chase that tse-tse fly with a sharp cutlass?

Spoken like a true wise man.

Flashmove:



my issue now is the bride price i paid before all these issues came up

A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage....you said you are an evangelist?, i expected you to be wise, infact i don't expect you to bring issues like this online cos i know your pastor is in the best position to tell you what to do, don't you think so since you an evangelist??....even when your parents have warned you against marrying her you still went ahead to pay her bride price?....bro be wise....again look before you leap.

Bros,.............. Dump her a** like there is no tomorrow. Even if she was my sister,still dump her a**

firstking01:
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage....you said you are an evangelist?, i expected you to be wise, infact i don't expect you to bring issues like this online cos i know your pastor is in the best position to tell you what to do, don't you think so since you an evangelist??....even when your parents have warned you against marrying her you still went ahead to pay her bride price?....bro be wise....again look before you leap.

They warned me do to land dispute that happened even before 1960 and they still have the issues in their minds thereby making our generations enemies to each other on marriages issues, but in other things we share the same community also. Their house is Just about 2km away from our own.

I paid her bride price cause i like and want to use her to make peace also in our community but she seems not to understand , She was also aware that i was warned not to marry. The warning was an open one.

All the burdens of the family is rested on be even though I am the second to last born in a family of 4 Boys and 1 Girl.

Even my last brother is married with 4 kids and other ones have 5 kids each... Its only that do not have a cause i want to do Marriage before having a baby, she knew how am suffering to make sure things gets okay. Posting this online is the best option for me cause she sometimes act as if someone is sending her to attack me just because her visa is not yet ready to travel....

I am an Evangelist and I rule out the option of Telling any Pastor , Prophets about Issues of Marriage or Relationship


They may cause more harm to me than good, I believe the opinions of the public which i filter and choose the right one that will solve the issue.

Am talking with a experience i have encountered ...

EbukaHades10:
Spoken like a true wise man.

Many thanks Bro.

1234onyekwe:
I don't believe this story at all, u building a duplex on a part time job & equally hopping on a full time job ,u are still the same person complaining of financial challenges.

Financial challenges i have does not mean i can not afford her air ticket. nor have a good food to eat......

Am building a 4 bedroom duplex On Decking level now (2 bedroom self contain finish and waiting roofing now., )

The building is fenced now....

Approach View attached

Flashmove:



They warned me do to land dispute that happened even before 1960 and they still have the issues in their minds thereby making our generations enemies to each other on marriages issues, but in other things we share the same community also. Their house is Just about 2km away from our own.

I paid her bride price cause i like and want to use her to make peace also in our community but she seems not to understand , She was also aware that i was warned not to marry. The warning was an open one.

All the burdens of the family is rested on be even though I am the second to last born in a family of 4 Boys and 1 Girl.

Even my last brother is married with 4 kids and other ones have 5 kids each... Its only that do not have a cause i want to do Marriage before having a baby, she knew how am suffering to make sure things gets okay. Posting this online is the best option for me cause she sometimes act as if someone is sending her to attack me just because her visa is not yet ready to travel....

Brother man, she's not the only girl in this planet....seems like you are a "good" person, my last submission, just dump her and move on....some women are bad lucks, i mean theit stenches of badluck can be contagious.

firstking01:
Brother man, she's not the only girl in this planet....seems like you are a "good" person, my last submission, just dump her and move on....some women are bad lucks.

How about the Bride price i paid, How should i terminate that, Her Uncle is not aware of these issues and i dont want to always complain about her to the uncle who serves as her Father. she lost her parents when she was about 10 years old ,


I have pity for her but she makes me feel that she likes money than a happy home.

Flashmove:


How about the Bride price i paid, How should i terminate that, Her Uncle is not aware of these issues and i dont want to always complain about her to the uncle who serves as her Father. she lost her parents when she was about 10 years old ,


I have pity for her but she makes me feel that she likes money than a happy home.

Ur still talking about bride price bro.
If u eventually fly that girl out of this country.
She will become a fire that u will never control.
Even when u have a fire extinguishers.

Don't make the mistake twice.
She z a damn badluck

You better dump that girl and move on with your life and get a better woman to marry. All Nigerian girls are now gold diggers , they see marriage as a job where they will be earning money . Better dump her because if she ever come over sea definitely she Will dump you and follow another Man.Nigerian's girl's are heartless ooh

I have never seen any Nigerian man that live in south Africa and still come back to Nigeria to marry. This is because Nigerian girls are the worst women I ever seen. They are taking advantage of our culture and population of 200 million so they think no matter what they do ,there are still men that will marry them

Flashmove:


How about the Bride price i paid, How should i terminate that, Her Uncle is not aware of these issues and i dont want to always complain about her to the uncle who serves as her Father. she lost her parents when she was about 10 years old ,


I have pity for her but she makes me feel that she likes money than a happy home.

That's why i first stated that a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, that's concerning the issue of the pride price you 've already paid....truth is, you have to talk to her uncle and explain the situation of things to her before you call it a quit so it won't look disrespectful to her uncle owin to the fact that he's representing her dad.....but pls, whatever her uncle said tell him your mind is made up already cos personally i won't advice you to marry her, let the pride price go....it's only in white wedding that i know you can't divorce you 've exchanged marital vows on the alter.....so, go tell her uncle that you are quiting for good....at this your level i won't say you are doing bad, your problem is you are looking deep so much on your age cos you felt your younger ones have all gotten married, bro, life is not a competition, you and your brothers have diversities in destiny....i'm sure you have other female admirers and friends, go close to one and make her your friend....women are everywhere that are just waiting for the almighty question, "will you marry me", and trust me, out of every 10 women you'd ask this question 8 will tell you YES...husbands are scarce bro, esp the God fearing ones like you, so, calm down and do your search proper....goodluck...and pls, don't marry or date a woman out of pity

firstking01:
That's why i first stated that a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage, that's concerning the issue of the pride price you 've already paid....truth is, you have to talk to her uncle and explain the situation of things to her before you call it a quit so it won't look disrespectful to her uncle owin to the fact that he's representing her dad.....but pls, whatever her uncle said tell him your mind is made up already cos personally i won't advice you to marry her, let the pride price go....it's only in white wedding that i know you can't divorce you 've exchanged marital vows on the alter.....so, go tell her uncle that you are quiting for good....at this your level i won't say you are doing bad, your problem is you are looking deep so much on your age cos you felt your younger ones have all gotten married, bro, life is not a competition, you and your brothers have diversities in destiny....i'm sure you have other female admirers and friends, go close to one and make her your friend....women are everywhere that are just waiting for the almighty question, "will you marry me", and trust me, out of every 10 women you'd ask this question 8 will tell you YES...husbands are scarce bro, esp the God fearing ones like you, so, calm down and do your search proper....goodluck...and pls, don't marry or date a woman out of pity

Thank you so much....

Op,what if after suffering with u nd decide to shut me out wen u start enjoying?concerning ur issue,jus let her b or u are on ur own

Op bend down ur head bead am well hw fa bend ur head well bend am well con give ur self hot knock
watin dey do u
u won help her destiny she said no u no go leave am

Love Machine:
I have found out that whenever a lady I like is giving me problem like yours, it is always affecting my day to day activities. That is,i will become unhappy and unable to carryout my task.But immediately I decide to moved on with my life,i will totally become a happy person.Ladies as such should be done with.

Eehya! U should become alien luminous like me!!! Women issues no dey affect me o......I just lock d fvck UP! D OP should do same....a wife who never called her husband for d past one month? DAT one na wife?

nnamdiokere45:
a month? and she neva cal? abeg leave her

I wonder ooo ...