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Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... - Jokes Etc (15) - Nairaland

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Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 2:20pm On Nov 05, 2017
Krystaal:
That awkward moment your younger brother ask you to spell diarrhea in front of the whole family and you are like
Can't you check your dictionary? Oponu!
Then your dad boomed "spell it for him now, agba ya"
And the whole house went silent again for you to talk and your brother getting set to right it down
Then you are like...
D-a-o-r-i-a.....dioaria
Asiri werey ba tu!!! grin grin

Trying to form and take escape route out b4 papa come corner am cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 2:20pm On Nov 05, 2017
shervydman:

mo ku o.......jesu gbami!!!! grin grin grin cheesy cheesy cheesy
cheesy cheesy grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:11pm On Nov 06, 2017
A thief stole a television set from a house, as he ran out, a mad man who is a resident in that house gave the thief a hot chase.
The more the thief ran,the more the mad man increased his pace....
The thief could not run any more at a point and sat under a tree.
The mad man caught up with him and sat next to him panting for breathe.
After a while, the thief broke the silence.
Thief: Why are you chasing after me?
Mad man: You forgot the remote control. grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:13pm On Nov 06, 2017
some one just told me ugly girls fall pregnant just to prove they can have sex too. grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:14pm On Nov 06, 2017
My crush just liked my profile picture on Facebook . Anyone who knows a wedding planner ?? . inbox me please

4 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:17pm On Nov 06, 2017
One of the best feelings in the world is when someone you hate tells a joke & nobody laughs grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:18pm On Nov 06, 2017
Step Dad : Kids Your Making Noise...Shut the hell Up! - Kids : You Found Us Making Noise...So Please Excuse Us! grin grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:20pm On Nov 06, 2017
Most people take many selfie pics, save the best pictures, and delete the others.
.
But later, we see them walking like the deleted pictures on the streets. grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:27pm On Nov 06, 2017
Blacks will walk with slippers shoes in the mall. . Just to prove that they came with a car, not public transport. grin grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:30pm On Nov 06, 2017
I heard some ladies saying things like "There's nothing i can't do that men can do".
.
My sister, can you also wear a single under wear for the whole week grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:31pm On Nov 06, 2017
It's confusing when you see short people celebrating their birthdays. Whereas they are not even growing
that same height for 5 birthdays grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:34pm On Nov 06, 2017
Heartbreak will make you go out with your remote thinking it's your phone grin

4 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 5:36pm On Nov 06, 2017
A grade 3 learner asked her teacher, what are periods. Teacher said " A periods is a length of time for each lesson".
.
The boy replied "That periods must be realy bad, because my sister told mum that she missed her periods, my daddy fainted, and our gardner escaped. grin

4 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 7:58pm On Nov 07, 2017
Krystaal:
Heartbreak will make you go out with your remote thinking it's your phone grin

No be small thing undecided grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 7:59pm On Nov 07, 2017
Krystaal:
Blacks will walk with slippers shoes in the mall.
.
Just to prove that they came with a car, not public transport. grin grin
cheesy wink cool
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 8:49am On Nov 08, 2017
I always enjoyed sleeping naked.
.
Until the day a rat nearly circumcised me for a second time. Trust me, i will never sleep naked again.

3 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 8:51am On Nov 08, 2017
Wife:What are you doing? Hubby:I'm killing Mosquitoes Wife:How many did you killed so far? Hubby:5 in total,2 Males and 3 females Wife:Whaaat? How do you know their Genders? Hubby:2 near the Beer and 3 near the Mirror grin

6 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 9:00am On Nov 08, 2017
Awoman hears someone knock at the door.
She opens to see and a man asks,
"Do you have a Vagina??" She slams the door in disgust.the next day she hears a knock,opens up and its the same man.He ask the same question,the woman slams the door again.her husband get back home after work.the lady tells him what happened for the last 2 days."
Husband says to her,"Honey,I'm taking a day off tomorrow to be home just in case this bastard shows up again."
The next morning,they hear a knock at the door and the husband says,"I am going to hide behind the door and listen.if it is the same guy,I want you to answer "Yes" to see where he is going with this I want to beat the hell out of him!
The man asks the same Question,"Do you have a Vagina?"
"Yes!" Replies the woman.
The man replies:"Good! Would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife alone and start using yours

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 9:01am On Nov 08, 2017
Last friday was my Birthday.my girlfriend didn't wish me a happy Birthday.
My parents forgot also and so did my friends?...
I went to work and even my Colleagues didn't wish me a happy Birthday.as I entered my office,my Secretary said,"Happy Birthday Boss".....mmm I fell so special.She asked me out for Lunch."
After Lunch,she invited me to her apartment.we went there and she said,"Do you mind if I go into the Bedroom for a minute?"
"Okay",I said....She came out 5 minutes later with a Birthday Cake and Champaigne.My girlfriend,My parents,my friends and my Colleagues...all screaming....."Surprise!!!!!
Guess What Happened??
.
.
.
.
I was waiting on the Sofa.....Naked!!

5 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 9:16am On Nov 08, 2017
I have changed my car hooter. It sounds like a gunshot instead of that "beep - beep" sound.
.
Trust me, it's amazing now, people move faster on the road when i hoot now. grin

3 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 2:39pm On Nov 08, 2017
Krystaal:
Wife:What are you doing?
Hubby:I'm killing Mosquitoes
Wife:How many did you killed so far?
Hubby:5 in total,2 Males and 3 females
Wife:Whaaat? How do you know their Genders?
Hubby:2 near the Beer and 3 near the Mirror grin
cheesy cheesy cheesy grin grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 2:42pm On Nov 08, 2017
Krystaal:

Last friday was my Birthday.my girlfriend didn't wish me a happy Birthday.
My parents forgot also and so did my friends?...
I went to work and even my Colleagues didn't wish me a happy Birthday.as I entered my office,my Secretary said,"Happy Birthday Boss".....mmm I fell so special.She asked me out for Lunch."
After Lunch,she invited me to her apartment.we went there and she said,"Do you mind if I go into the Bedroom for a minute?"
"Okay",I said....She came out 5 minutes later with a Birthday Cake and Champaigne.My girlfriend,My parents,my friends and my Colleagues...all screaming....."Surprise!!!!!
Guess What Happened??
.
I was waiting on the Sofa.....Naked!!

Hahahahahhahahaha, he go pray say make ground open mouth make he enter right there cheesy cheesy cheesy grin grin grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by vivie01(f): 2:44pm On Nov 08, 2017
Krystaal:
I have changed my car hooter. It sounds like a gunshot instead of that "beep - beep" sound.
Trust me, it's amazing now, people move faster on the road when i hoot now. grin

You go give people HBP ooooooo cheesy cheesy cheesy grin grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by maleekfrenzy(m): 6:08pm On Nov 08, 2017
I laughed to the extent that tears was coming from my eyes..kudos bro
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by TheGoodTruth(m): 6:37pm On Nov 08, 2017
Krystaal:
# I Bought Power Bank N650
...And I Was Very Happy It Was Cheap Until My Phone Started Charging The Power Bank


grin


Latest definition of gobe.
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Mistymash: 12:50pm On Nov 09, 2017
I will lace the condom with chloroquine. Will wait for you for your next prescription tongue. Great jokes tho.
Krystaal:
My Ex works in a pharmacy,so whenever I want to spoil her mood I just go there and buy condom for no reason sometimes I go 3 times a day grin grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 1:03pm On Nov 09, 2017
Short people are looking very funny when wearing sun hats. . They would be looking exactly like mushrooms. grin grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 1:05pm On Nov 09, 2017
There are many things we can learn from Dogs like being Loyal,protective,caring and loving unconditionally,but we choose to learn only one thing
.
.
.
.
Dog Style...Why? grin
Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 1:06pm On Nov 09, 2017
Steal your Girl's phone and Text her Best friend saying.."I'm pregnant and if she replies "for who?"
.
.
.
My Brother I have a story to tell grin

1 Like

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 1:09pm On Nov 09, 2017
Real Stress is when you finally meet your Girlfriend's Mother and she says,
"So you are the one who is always dropping off my daughter at 3AM every weekend with a Red Car?
......But you don't even have a Bicycle.... grin

2 Likes

Re: Latest Funny Joke 1000001% By Krystal... by Krystaal(m): 1:16pm On Nov 09, 2017
Tips for loosing weight..! Slowly turn your head to the left then again to your right.. Repeat this exercise when offered food.. grin

2 Likes 1 Share

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