Most opposite things in life are separated by a thin line. For example, lie and truth, life and death, good and bad, love and lust, sadness and happiness, friends and enemies.

Today I want to talk about the thin line between love and lust. But before that please take a second to answer these questions. What is love and lust?
Which one of them is the foundation of your relationship? How sure are you about your answer?
Is there truly a difference between love and lust?

I know love to be unconditional and lust to be conditional (inclined strictly on self benefits). Now, is there anyway you will be dating a person and not look out for your self benefits? Of course everyone does look out for self benefits which could either be in sexual, monetary, fame, or companionship form.

I guess you have heard comments like " I love him because he keeps me company" , "I love him because he is cute" , " I love him because he gives me money and fame".
The " because " in those statements contradicts the love. Love is unconditional so if there's a " because " in your love then I don't think you're in love. Lol!! Well, majority of the love we see are actually lust disguised as love. Only few practice true love.

The other day, I bumped into Miss A who was actually preparing for her wedding. So I asked her why she was marrying her man. She said it was because she loved him. I was like " What makes you feel you love him?"
"I know I love him because I have strong feelings for him " she replied.

Hmmmmm! Love isn’t a feeling because feelings don’t last; can be easily changed and blown away. Feelings are like weeds, they grow on unwanted places and it's usually your choice to either uproot it or nurture them. When you water them with care and attention they blossom and that becomes the beginning of a "love" story. Next season another weed (feeling) might grow and start striving for nutrients (affection) with the existing weed. That's when you would hear someone say they are in "love" with two or more people and cheating sets in.

What then is love? Love is a choice to commit to helping, respecting and caring for another. Love is willingly taking up a responsibility to love, cherish and sacrifice selflessly for the betterment of another person not minding if the person deserves it or not. It is an everlasting commitment.

Lust on the other hand, is a thought or a strong feeling you conceive to do something immoral. It is a desire to benefit from the other person. It is usually propelled by what we see or perceive about the individual. This could be the beauty, intelligence, character, abilities, status quo, or money.

Below are some contrasting features between love and lust.

1. Lust is ignited with the flames of sexual passion. It burns off and dies as soon as it is gratified. When it speaks, it focuses on sensuality, carnality and worldly passion. However, love can't be burnt by fire instead it glows in it. Unlike lust, love language only edifies and improves life.

2. Lust is impatient and could lead to premarital or extramarital sex. I know of a married man who cheated on his wife with the reason that she just gave birth and couldn't have sex with him. Meanwhile he wasn't ready to wait for her recovery so he used his ex girlfriend to relieve his urge at that time. He was caught and the marriage was ruined. But love is patient and respects vows of commitment.

3. Lust can thrive for long but cannot sufficiently build a long lasting relationship. However, true love is the best foundation for any successful relationship once it’s exclusively mutual.

4. Lust deafens and blinds you to the possible consequences of your actions. It separates you from God and isolates you from good friends. Love makes your life better, it makes you get closer to God and help you build meaningful relationship amongst friends, families and associates.

5. Lust makes you confused and indecisive “I love him but he beats me”, “I love him, I don’t want to lose him but he’s harsh, rude, proud and so on”. That's confusion. It affects your sense of judgment and you will end up making mistakes.

6. You lose NOTHING in love even if the relationship doesn’t lead to marriage but in lust, you lose either something or many things. When lust is over you feel USED by the other person.

7. Lust manipulates, controls, bounds you to your insatiable emotions and leaves you with guilt but love is gentle, kind and makes you free.

8. Lust is selfish and ungrateful. Even if you feed it with your last blood it would still want more. This is why you would see some lusting partners walking away from a relationship even after the other partner has sacrificed all that he or she has just to satisfy the lusting partner . But love is contented and grateful. In love, little is seen as much.

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http://www.soniasblog.com/2017/06/could-this-be-love.html

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