My father in law is late (RIP), he was a good man and he never stressed me. When things were really rough for my husband, I didn't see any family member, in fact no one came to visit us except my father in law, my mother in law too is late.

My problem is my husband's two Aunties, for 2 years now they have been making my life miserable, always saying bad things about me to people. Someone in my husband's family told me that they are behaving like that because they think I am the one collecting my husband's money but God knows. They are always demanding large sum of money from my husband & I don't mind (it's none of business, even though my husband complain to me most times).

There was a day one of my husband's aunt told my husband to always tell them about anything he is doing. One thing I will never accept from any human being is someone disrespecting my mom, one of his aunt was talking anyhow to my mom few months ago (my mom is very old & she doesn't make trouble). They also talk anyhow to me in public and in the presence of my staff that I will even start crying due to the embarrassment.

I have complained to my husband several times & he told me to do whatever I wish to do to them but It's not in my nature to disrespect elderly people, they are really pushing me, if they continue behaving like this I might disrespect them.

I can remember how my husband's family members tell me that women don't stay long in their family before they go but which woman will stay long with the way they treat them.

I didn't know from the beginning, I have been with my husband for 5years now, he is a very good person, in fact he told me himself that he wish he has no family member, he also told me that he can't talk to them about the way they are behaving.

I will appreciate any good opinion, God bless you all.

you also wrote that "his aunties are always demanding money from him and it's non of your business,even though he sometimes complains to you"...

'And he told you to do whatever you like to his aunties,because there is nothing he can do about it '..

Both of you are indifferent to each other's plight,and until you both come together and figure out the best way to handle the situation...
There is nothing we nairalanders can do about it....
This is my own suggestion...
#God bless you too.

lalasticlala,Mynd44

I will advice you to pray about it. some people are just so wicked. they will never remember you when you are in the pot of poverty but they will start shouting your name the moment you hammered. when next they come with their troubles, make it clear to them that you are just respecting them as elders n in-laws. but since they don't want respect , you are ready to handle them the best way they deserved. this will make them to think twice. above all pray. pray and pray. may God change their minds towards you in Jesus name Amen

are u staying with his aunties or what?

nawa o family issue weak me

If am to go by your explanation,then it shows that ,ur sisters in-law are not to be blamed.Rather ur husband shld be blamed for the too much leverage and leniencies he gave them.Please don't get me wrong.From the little I understand about marriage, it is a life long contract between TWO people, not THREE not FOUR.Your husband gave his sisters the room to pokenose into his personal affairs,and that's what's causing all this problems.Am not saying he shldnt help his siblings, but there's a limit to everything. His immediate family ought to be his first priority. He shld tighten the nuts and make them understand that he has a family of his own to cater for ,and so they shld expect less from him.

Your husband is at fault here.

Why would he continue to fund 2 overgrown babies who choose not to do anything meaningful with their lives but keep on demanding money just to spite you.

He should set boundaries and talk to them about their attitude or it'll continue.

ReneeNuttall:
If am to go by your explanation,then it shows that ,ur sisters in-law are not to be blamed.Rather ur husband shld be blamed for the too much leverage and leniencies he gave them.Please don't get me wrong.From the little I understand about marriage, it is a life long contract between TWO people, not THREE not FOUR.Your husband gave his sisters the room to pokenose into his personal affairs,and that's what's causing all this problems.Am not saying he shldnt help his siblings, but there's a limit to everything. His immediate family ought to be his first priority. He shld tighten the nuts and make them understand that he has a family of his own to cater for ,and so they shld expect less from him.

Thanks dear,there is 100% sense in your post.

Op sort things out with your husband,telling you to do whatsoever you want is not the solution to the issues at hand.

Replace words wiv action yuh husband has given u d go ahead order.... or just continue taking d crap,d choice x yuhs.... U Berra man up and mark yuh territory... Choice x yuhs...

Evablizin:
Thanks dear,there is 100% sense in your post.

Op sort things out with your husband,telling you to do whatsoever you want is not the solution to the issues at hand.

Ywc,if she goes ahead and do what her husbands says,the whole blame will still fall on her.After all blood is always thicker than water.

How can a man, a full grown adult, a responsible married man, allow his relatives (dad, mum, brother, sister, uncle, auntie or under any relationship definition) harass his wife for any reason whatsoever

Truly not all "men" are men...

Both you and your husband don't care about one another. He often complain to you about his problems and you are here saying it's not really your concern. At thesame time you still want him to be concerned about your own issues with his aunties?
The earlier you two start supporting each other, the better for the marriage.

Speak to ur husband together u guys will come up with a solution. Asking u to do whatever u like won't solve the problem instead might worsen it.

In-laws

Your in-laws wont speak bad of you if your husband did not give them the information to be used against you.

''There was a day one of my husband's aunt told my husband to always tell them about anything he is doing.''

Its probably because your in-laws dont trust you as you may have shown signs of being selfish, are you among the type of women who do things without their husbands knowledge as regards finance or investment?

Check yourself, there could be something you are not doing right in your marriage and when you start doing it right, your husband will step up to protect you as it is within his ability to call his siblings and your in-laws to order in matters concerning you.
Cheer up and learn new ways to build your home and those who speak ill of you today will be the same people to speak good of you tomorrow.
Dont quit yet!

sorry oh

Woman you said it all, the two people you owe something to are late. Any other person is an intruder, be it uncles or aunties.

did u just say your husband is a good man? hell no, he isn't even A man let alone a good one, he is not protecting u, he is giving room for his relative to verbally assault u and u call him a good man?


u mentioned that it's none of your business if he gives his aunt large amount of money Are u for real? you dnt seem to know your place in his life, your hubby is wasting monies meant for u and ur children's future and u are playing pretend what happens if things go bad and u find yourselves in tough times?

please this isn't an issue of fasting and prayer, your husband should put his feet on the ground and be the man of the house. if it's possible to relocate, do that ASAP, both of you should set out time to plan for the family , set achievable goals, invest on business and properties and more properties, it is only when u dont know what to do with your money that u will allow a relative turn u to an ATM, these relatives your husband is wasting his sweat for will not hesitate to laugh at u and call u a witch and waster when u find yourself in financial crisis, may that not be your portion. You need to stand firm, fight for your marriage, fight for your children and their future, dnt allow them to bully u, wicked people enjoy your tears and weakness, so they will always want to make u cry.

This what I can't allow my relatives do to my wife

Your husband is supposed to handle the issue rather than telling you to do them anything you want


Madam this is not your battle

Do you have kids for your husband?

Does any of his family members stay with him?

My sister I will advise you to do whatever you like to them.

Atleast for once e no go bad make person cut chain

If you don't show them your strength, They will always take you for your weakness

Chronicles of in-laws

My take..it's confusing cause your husband doesn't wanna do anything about it that's very weird try and talk to him because he's the head and he can't say he can't do anything about it and that you should do what you like so who is now the head of the family? Good luck ma

If there is another elder in your family, beckon on them to speak on your behalf!

I personally don't encourage 3rd parties in a union.

Your husband should man up and give them the piece of his mind! After they have gotten the gist na apology go end am in the long run.

Kill their plans before they sow their seeds of discord in your marriage!

These ones are enemies of progress ooooo speaking harshly to you in the presence of your staff

Omò, you too slack!

Your husband is to blame not your in-laws, he has given them
too much leverage over your marriage.
Do not fight them because your husband will be keeping scores,
let him face them himself.