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Is the sexual health of your marriage in jeopardy?

Jzhane October 25, 2017 Jenny from the blog! 4 Comments

”I am not in the mood” , Sheila said to her husband when he tried to make moves to have sex last night.

”Oh my God Sheila,I have had enough”!……screamed Jack her husband of almost three years.

Jack continued:

”You are hardly ever in the mood. Its either you are tired or you are on your period or some freaking excuse. Its been two weeks since we had that sloppy seconds and woman,I am damn tired of all this bullshit. Its either you change this behavior of yours or I will have no other choice but to find myself someone else who will be more than willing to satisfy my needs. For goodness sake,I have got needs woman!”.

Jack stormed out of the room and went to the guest room to sleep.

Sheila couldn’t believe what just happened. She started to cry. After a while,she stopped. She noticed that Jack didn’t come back to the bedroom as he usually does after they have their fights. Sheila always looked forward to the times Jack would come back and hold her,comfort her after they had fought or yelled. But this time,t was different. Jack slept in the guest room for the next few days.

The above situation with Sheila and Jack is the beginning of the breakdown of many marriages. Sad to say,many do not recognize the real problem they are facing. The problem is not lack of love or the urge for sexual intimacy. The real problem is lack of communication and understanding.





Sexual problems in marriages account for 45% of the reasons couple file for divorce. Husbands and wives may find themselves in a situation where they are having sexual problems leading to frustration,dissatisfaction and emotional breakdown.

Lets look at the some of the reasons couples go through sexual problems in marriage:

Frigidity: Native remedies defines as the term broadly used to refer to a low libido (sex drive) in women. This term is often used incorrectly to describe a woman who is emotionally cold or does not respond to her partner’s sexual advances. … In other cases, women may have difficulty being aroused or sex may even cause considerable pain or discomfort. Surprisingly, this situation can also affect men. Couples need education on this condition. Understanding and communication is also required. Understand that it is not that your spouse does not love you or want you but just like other mental disorders,frigidity is an ailment that affects them. The good news is that with love,understanding care and patience, anyone can overcome this condition. The problem however is that most people are not aware of the condition. Some are not patient either. For more information and resources on how to deal with frigidity,please read more on:http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/how-to-cure-frigidity-in-women-and-increase-female-sex-drive
Emotional distance: Couples may be love but be emotionally disconnected. Being emotionally aware means knowing when feelings are present in ourselves and others. Be in tune with the emotions of your spouse. Emotional awareness is difficult for men as men are generally known to be less emotional than women. However,a conscious effort to be aware of your emotions and the emotions of your spouse will greatly reduce the frustrations with sexual intimacy. Understanding the emotions of feelings of fear or pain or anxiety will help a spouse reach out to each other,helping each other find comfort and release. Talking about feelings also helps. The feeling that your spouse understands is very helpful.
Dissatisfaction: Couples should strive to ensure that the sexual intercourse is not a one way traffic. Most people get turned off from the idea of sex because of the feeling of dissatisfaction. Make an effort to pleasure your spouse during intercourse. Where necessary,seek medical attention to help improve sexual libido. Also, find exciting ways to spice up the sex life. Do fun things together from time to time
Other reasons: Sickness,unmet expectations,over work,raising children,stress,financial imbalance, loss of attraction towards spouse,overweight,etc…. among other reasons,cause sexual problems among couples
SOLUTIONS:

I could go on and on about possible solutions to the sexual problems faced by couples in marriage but all the solutions are hinged on one major thing:

COMMUNICATION!…COMMUNICATION!!….and more COMMUNICATION!!!

Couples need to communicate more. Talk about how you feel. Talk about the sex. Talk about how to improve your sex life. Do not leave your spouse to figure it out what to do about the situation alone. Work on it together. Explore together. Pray about it together…yes,pray…lol (so what has prayer got to do with sex?…dont ask me,just pray and testify later…lolzzzzzzzzz).

In communication,if done properly,you will find out how to please each other better,what the problems are and how to overcome them.

Sex is good for couples. God knows why he allowed it. It helps reduce hear conditions,overweight and promotes closeness.

Lively Stones is about helping people develop healthy relationships,if you feel you need professional help with addressing sexual problems in your marriage,our counselors are happy to speak or meet with you for free. Please reach out to us today. Note,all sessions with our counselors are private and client information will not be divulged without the authorization of client.



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Yours Truly,



Jzhane�





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