hustla:



Well, I've always said this since my 100Level

There is no way I'll marry abroad and not make sure prenup is involved

Life happens, love could turn sour and your partner can decide tomorrow they want to abandon ship.. Prenup will help in that case to avoid stories that touch

But what money do you and I have that warrants to do prenuptial ....

what you achieve in a marriage is common property , prenup at best only protects what you had before the marriage

hustla:

My mom's best friend did it for her son

I was there when he was shipped to our house

Was told he'd come back home 1.30am in the UK and when asked where he went to, he'd give his mom the middle finger and insult her.. So she tricked him into visiting Nigeria

He spent just two years in Nigeria and was sent to a boarding school where the principal is a strict disciplinarian... The Principal then assigned a Teacher to him

Within 2 yrs after plenty beating, baba don sabi wake up early, arrange in bed well, wash in clothes and was meek like a new born lamb

Since he went back to the UK, his mom has not complained about him

The good old days when naija was good. I worked with a colleague here whose mum did the same in the 90s. He said he was so unruly so his mum tricked him and took him to naija when he was like ss1. He was left there for3 years. He said that act saved him looking back.

Initally he hated it. He was sent to boarding and he was like....o the little things we take for granted. He had culture shock that even bathroom tap in naija will be there for decoration . It dont work and u have to fetch water. Little things like that he never thought how blessed he was in UK.

He came back after 3 years so reformed, no more gang and good for nothing behaviour... we worked together on a project and he is such a focus individual ...based on his gist I swear once your son starts giving you problems you ship them off. He such a success example as he said a lot of his old friends are now grown up to no good still

However this was naija and boarding in the 90s. Naija has changed significantly. If you try it your child might even be kidnapped as an example

We now have to think of a new way to reset the children brain if misbehaving.

fatima04:


I would advise you buy the kit for day 2 and day 8 all in one and not split it, you need correct reference number for the locator form. And day 2 test is for green list countries and such references may be different if transiting from country on Amber list.

Thanks

Mamatukwas:


Seen your message (s) and replied all.

Good morning. Pls check ur email

LagosismyHome:


But what money do you and I have that warrants to do prenuptial ....

what you achieve in a marriage is common property , prenup at best only protects what you had before the marriage

I no get money now oo but i no fit come slave, buy property, come dash am out to person just because e get vgina

God forbid o

LagosismyHome:

The good old days when naija was good. I worked with a colleague here whose mum did the same in the 90s. He said he was so unruly so his mum tricked him and took him to naija when he was like ss1. He was left there for3 years. He said that act saved him looking back.

Initally he hated it. He was sent to boarding and he was like....o the little things we take for granted. He had culture shock that even bathroom tap on naija will be there for decoration . It dont work and u have to fetch water. Little things like that e never thought how blessed he was in UK.

He came back after 3 years so reformed, no more gang and go for nothing behaviour... we worked together on a project and he is such a focus individual ...based on his gist I swear once your son starts giving you problems you ship them off. He such a success example as he said a lot of his old friends are now grown up to no good still

However this was naija and boarding in the 90s. Naija has changed significantly. If you try it your child might even be kidnapped as an example

We now have to think of a new way to reset the children brain if misbehaving.

I think it makes them see that life is not a bed of roses and they're extremely privileged

Some don't realize it until those privileges are removed from them

2 like that were in my secondary sch class. One was the son of the apena of Egbaland. He told me he used to go and 'jack' cd players from people's cars with his friends and sell them, fight everytime etc

He spent about 6 years in Nigeria, received some sense and is now doing very well since he returned to the UK

hustla:





I think it makes them see that life is not a bed of roses and they're extremely privileged

Some don't realize it until those privileges are removed from them

2 like that were in my secondary sch class. One was the son of the apena of Egbaland. He told me he used to go and 'jack' cd players from people's cars with his friends and sell them, fight everytime etc

He spent about 6 years in Nigeria, received some sense and is now doing very well since he returned to the UK

Agreed. It's all due to privileges and not being appreciative enough of the fact that you almost have it all. Some abroad kids also benefit greatly from that 1 gap year they spend travelling to Africa on "self discovery" journey

Lexusgs430:


That was my magic bullet..... 22 years and still waxing stronger daily...... I indeed got a diamond, in the midst and surrounded by a sea of mud...........

22 years of marriage and about 26+ years of experience........

My own is invite us for the 25yrs anniversary and let's rejoice and tap in the "luck"

hustla:



Won't prenup come in handy?

Hehheeh , what are we protecting as upcoming rich people

The worrying thing with schooling here is the bullying as well. A friend of mine said she used to be called a monkey back for taunts as far back as Year 5.

Like raising a child is not hard enough, na raising one to be resilient and having a tough skin is key, so it doesn't damage their confidence or mental health.

Lexusgs430:



Look for someone that wants naira, and conduct trade by barter.......

Thank you.
I have been searching but not seen any.

Chanils:


Thank you.
I have been searching but not seen any.

Ehen...... I need to send you some edible carrots......

Lexusgs430:


Ehen...... I need to send you some edible carrots......

I need pounds ooo. Who want naira ejor

fatima04:
The worrying thing with schooling here is the bullying as well. A friend of mine said she used to be called a monkey back for taunts as far back as Year 5.

Like raising a child is not hard enough, na raising one to be resilient and having a tough skin is key, so it doesn't damage their confidence or mental health.

This amongst many other reasons is why I’m thinking about starting a parenting thread for NaijaUK immigrants . There’s so much to unpack on the matter, if your kids now go to a school that is almost 99% white, the issues are separate.

Na wa.

fatima04:


Hehheeh , what are we protecting as upcoming rich people

Just incase naw

fatima04:


Agreed. It's all due to privileges and not being appreciative enough of the fact that you almost have it all. Some abroad kids also benefit greatly from that 1 gap year they spend travelling to Africa on "self discovery" journey

I like this "self discovery"

Chanils:


I need pounds ooo. Who want naira ejor

Slide into my DM......

Parenting is trial and error, hit and miss.

Nigerian parenting is basically doses of beatings/threats of beatings interspersed with helpings of parables and wisdom fed to one by their fathers, while Nigerian parents relied largely on the wider society to acculturate and help train their children. The blithe way Nigerian parents sent 11 year-olds off to boarding school in the 70s and 80s, for instance (go and find your way in life, better be a good boy, remember where you come from and think about what people will say if you mess up) would be a recipe for disaster in the 2020s now that Nigerian society has rotted away.

Basically Nigerian parents in the abroad now have to face what westerners have been grappling with for some decades already - the fact that old certainties have fallen away and one has to realise that parenting nowadays, motivational speakers and self-acclaimed gurus notwithstanding, is ultimately 10% effort and up to 90% prayer/luck.

fatima04:


My own is invite us for the 25yrs anniversary and let's rejoice and tap in the "luck"

Very correct..... Only if you are footing and legging, 100% of the entertainment bill.....

All I can afford is a zoom covid anniversary party..........

The past few pages should be archived...too interesting.

On the parenting discussion, though I do not have children yet but during my time in UK I worked with children and teenagers in schools. Like some people said parenting has no formula. It's just Grace.

I noticed somethings about we Nigerians which I think may help if it can be corrected.

1. Nigeria Parents should stop forcing their children to look like/ behave the Western way.
No be by force to get long hair, our girls can look good with weaves. For the boys, a good low cut or other fine low cuts are okay. No need for Jerry coils. Our hair cannot turn oyinbo hair overnight.

2. Parents should stop wearing tear tear Jeans for our young boys. There are lots of good clothing for boys out there. Asian kids where locally made cloths to school sometimes too

3. We should try as much as possible to let our children eat the local foods. I see Asian children talking about foods but our own do not know what eba/starch/amala/moimoin/other different soups taste like

4. No be by force to speak British English. Some Nigerian Parents Want their children to speak the British way, it's not by force. I have been to an interview and the Asian with the worst speaking ability got the job. It's a lab scientist job anyway.

5. Eba and Starch is eating with bare hands, not fork and knife. The Indian kids their local foods with hands but our naija kids are trained to eat eba with fork and knife

6. Everything is not Racism... I see naija mums coming to school daily and accusing the administration of been racist even on something that doesn't make sense.

7. Please our naija kids can listen to naija songs and speak out language. Asian kids speak their language e.g pidgin is not bad. I spoke with a naija dad sometimes back and he told me he wouldn't speak pidgin because he wants to keep his British accent safe.

There are a lot more, I can't remember now. But I believe some of these points may contribute to how a child is brought up. The elders can correct me o. I don't know if I am right or wrong. May God help everyone,


NB. I worked as a cover supervisor/teaching assistant for some months. I worked with children/teenagers from year 7 to 11 and the school has a mix of children (British, Asians, Africans). Also I attended a Nigerian Church and the way some parents relate with their children, OBoy.. na Only God.

.

LagosismyHome:



We now have to think of a new way to reset the children brain if misbehaving.

Very true. We need a new way of brain resetting for UK based kids

I was on the verge of sending my child to Nigeria a few years back to experience the reset. Nigeria was not that bad then. In the last few years kasala has burst. I was shook to think how I would have been coping with a child in a Nigerian secondary school with all these people swooping down on them as kidnapping targets!!

ramafama:


Very true. We need a new way of brain resetting for UK based kids

I was on the verge of sending my child to Nigeria a few years back to experience the reset. Nigeria was not that bad then. In the last few years kasala has burst. I was shook to think how I would have been coping with a child in a Nigerian secondary school with all these people swooping down on them as kidnapping targets!!

Money dey to pay ransom nah..... Naira is almost £1 - N750........

Mamatukwas:


This amongst many other reasons is why I’m thinking about starting a parenting thread for NaijaUK immigrants . There’s so much to unpack on the matter, if your kids now go to a school that is almost 99% white, the issues are separate.

Na wa.

My daughter was crying today because she saw an ant on the dinning table. I went to hit the ant or in my naija voice knack the ant. I turned and saw my daughter in full tears and scared of an ant that hardly visible with the eyes

I just had to hiss and shake head . ... the issues are really different. Scared of ant, were do I now start with this child of mine ...if only naija was still home sweet sweet, she surely would have needed a plane ticket to reset the brain

The cover supervisor is comparing schools in the metropolis and inner cities within a multicultural setting... It is a little different for kids in the shires and most of the north minus the inner cities of Manchester and Asian dominated places in North West especially...

It is about the children and their happiness; so the priority is for them to assimilate quickly and integrate not to carry Nja flag and so-called values which I dont even know what they are myself.

If you can inculcate your culture, language and traditions then fine but it cannot be forced at the expense of the child's well-being and happiness...

Speaking the Queen's English does not mean the child cannot understand a Nja language ( singular) and also if they chose to eat swallow with cutlery, that is so much better than not genuinely liking the food. Again, it is not by force and it does not make them less African...

Asians this, Asian that! The middle class and upper class Indians especially are far more colonial in their attitude more than the educated Nigerians. We are talking the Bleaching capital of the world - a lot of them bleach their skins to parse as whites and they gave been doing interracial marriages with white for a long long time. They also discriminate against their own blacks and our blacks.

They are no angels and most of them just pretend for their parents but the well to do and aspirational ones clearly do well and pass that energy, motivation, discipline and success factor to their children and lower generations...

The Pakistanis and Muslim Asians and those from other South Asian countries are no different from us...

The cover supervisor is right in saying that parenting is trial and error but it has to be child focus with child protection guidelines at the centre of one's mind.

If Nigeria is so great and our values and foods and way of life are do wonderful, many of us will not be here; we will be like our parents who studied and went back home afterwards.

If your child want to represent England, Waled or Scotland, will you oppose it?

LagosismyHome:


My daughter was crying today because she saw an ant on the dinning table. I went to hit the ant or in my naija voice knack the ant. I turned and saw my daughter in full tears and scared of an ant that hardly visible with the eyes

I just had to hiss and shake head . ... the issues are really different. Scared of ant, were do I now start with this child of mine ...if only naija was still home sweet sweet, she surely would have needed a plane ticket to reset the brain

LMAO That one is okay jor, na woman matter. My daughter is EXACTLY the same way! Mopol for anything that creeps and crawls it’s my boys that can’t be bothered. She doesn’t need reset please. Save it for more serious things.

In other news @all, if you have money please don’t chop/invest all, send your kids to good private schools if you can. The one near me, girls MUST wear knee length skirts to school, mini skirt is strictly forbidden. boys too must be properly & fully dressed at all times on school grounds, then parents sign that if your child is caught in possession of or imbibing any drug or alcohol it’s grounds for immediate expulsion. Drug testing is random, everyone signs too, no time. At least the school is joining hands with parents to instill discipline, amongst other perks.

If you can afford it, don’t invest all in crypto et al, please consider private schools. E get why.

hustla:



I no get money now oo but i no fit come slave, buy property, come dash am out to person just because e get vgina

God forbid o

Bad man

Mamatukwas:


LMAO That one is okay jor, na woman matter. My daughter is EXACTLY the same way! Mopol for anything that creeps and crawls it’s my boys that can’t be bothered. She doesn’t need reset please. Save it for more serious things.

In other news @all, if you have money please don’t chop/invest all, send your kids to good private schools if you can. The one near me, girls MUST wear knee length skirts to school, mini skirt is strictly forbidden. boys too must be properly & fully dressed at all times on school grounds, then parents sign that if your child is caught in possession of or imbibing any drug or alcohol it’s grounds for immediate expulsion. Drug testing is random, everyone signs too, no time. At least the school is joining hands with parents to instill discipline, amongst other perks.

If you can afford it, don’t invest all in crypto et al, please consider private schools. E get why.

Welll..... there been privately schooled people who dab into drugs ie diane abbott son. I think its the grace of God.

Someone raised in the uk once joking told me that majorities of the black boys will be into drugs . The gov /free school boys will be the seller and private school boys will be the buyer so there no escaping it. Although I guess it was said as a joke with some element of reality for some.

Private Or grammars school is much better than gov school i agree.... sweet soup na money kill am

Agbas

What is the benefit of having a credit card (even when you don't really have a tangible use-case)?

Thank you for using my referral link..... 2 shares fall on us...

https://hellostake.com/referral-program?referrer=oyedejij225

Olalekank:
Agbas

What is the benefit of having a credit card (even when you don't really have a tangible use-case)?

It's an extra line of funds + credit builder tool.........

Wait ohhh
So the Nigerian govt used Twitter to ban Twitter in Nigeria?

Wonders will never end.

All these people that can’t take objective criticisms. They are the problem of this world.