Episode 1


As I looked back that day to sound of my name called by a voice, I saw some ladies that I couldn’t identify cos the distance btw us was dead far. I replied by waving my hand at them while they did the same. I feel like moving towards them to know who they are but I was being sent on an errand by my father. Later, I shouted. I was feeling like ‘why is it that girls like my name’ as I was moving down to Amoo’s house which is not so far from our house. Let me not forget to introduce myself sha, my name is Fawaz, I’m an artiste popularly known as iTSF(The Soul of Flowz), I live at ibadan!!! ********************************
I was on my way back home the day after I delivered Alhaji’s (my dad) message to Amoo when I saw those ladies that called me the other time, to my surprise I didn’t know any of them. I greeted them and they were like ‘so, you don’t know us again?? Me: I don’t o Lady A: we were the one that took pix with you at elegant hotel!!! Me: I’m sorry, I still can’t remember u people o. B: you don’t need to, anyway my name is zinat C: keji A: they call me shally dee but my real name is shalewa… D: my own name is bimbo Me: you’ve all got a nice name and pls what can I do for you o Zinat: actually we saw how you performed at that show at elegant and we loved it, so we decided to invite you to a birthday! Me: and pls who is the person celebrating the birthday? Shalewa: I Me: wow!!! you know what? I’m busy right now, let me give you my phone number and pls give me a call!!! Bimbo gave me a phone of which I don’t know how to operate, I returned the phone to her by telling her to type it that I’m gonna call it for her 0 8 1 39 47 04 20…. I said, We’ll give you a call as soon as possible…. Bye bye, they said… So, as I was going home na so I dey remember those babes, lemme describe them to u *Zinat is short, dark with a very large bossom and nice backup… *Shalewa’s complexion was light, her bossom was not that plentiful, her height made sense, (in short she looked like fathia balogun) *Bimbo was chocolate, not that fat but huge (if u know wetin farmers do refer to as Bumper harvest, she’s the type) she’s tall, not that tall o, she carry back(massive type), she carry front(she really tried for the front), everything just gather for there and *Keji is light with full and massive chest that I’m sure any guy that suck am will suffocate, her behind is good one and have the same height as bimbo…. As I got home, na those babes matter I still dey carry for head as I fell into trouble… Alhaji: where is that Fawaz My bro: I donno where e dey o Na so I sneak out of the house cos I know that I’m in dead soup, then I summon the courage to go back inside.. As I open the gate, na so I saw something wey shock me….
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Alhaji called me in the morning to clean his shoes and wash his car, as I wan lay hand on the shoe na so he called me back to quickly go to Amoo’s (alhaji’s friend) house to collect some money from the man… I didn’t know that I’ve spent up to 40 minutes in the place that I can use only 2mins, Due to those girls I met on my way and the foolish thought I was thinking for my room…
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The thing that shocked me was that the shoe he said I should clean was soaked in water by my step mother’s son, I was like is this boy mad or crazy As I wan open door to Alhajiz sitting room, I saw alhaji at my back with a Koboko, I was like ‘why do I answer these girls now, see what they brought me into’ Go and kneel down in my room Alhaji said with a lion face… I’m sorry was what I said before I saw myself in an ocean of slap…. Alhaji: the way I will beat you today, you’ll never forget it Me: (weeping and rubbing my two hands together to plead for mercy) Alhaji: you said u no go listen to me abi, I will kill you today Na only cry I dey cry as I knelt down in his room, na so he lie down for bed…. For like an hour I was still on my kneel, na so I tap him for leg, to my surprise…. Alhaji don sleep!!! Which kind rubbish be this was what came to my mind, na so I dash out of his room….. I was really angry that I shouted at my mother when she called me… As I sidon for one corner in my room, I brought out my phones out of where I put them…. I saw some missed calls on my phones…. On the first phone 12 missed calls- Alhaji(when he sent me on errand) 8 missed calls -Queen(8minutes ago) On the second phone 2 missed calls -Alhaji(long ago) 1missed calls -Mum( an hour ago) 4 missed calls -An unknown glo number(22 mis ago) 2 missed calls -An unknown mtn num( 3 mins ago) I decided to go out to my mum shop to collect recharge card on credit, Me: abeg, gimme mtn 100 Mum: sheybi na me u dey shout at abi Me: pls, no mind me! Na dat your husband wey dey vex me Mum: (hissed and gave me the card) and where is the money Me: we go see later na I ran inside my room and as I carry my phone, I saw another 2 missed calls from that mtn unknown number… As I was loading the recharge cards, na so the num come call again Voice: its that iTSF Me: (silent) Voice: are you there?? Me: (cough) Voice: you aint serious Me: abeg who is this I’m speaking with Voice: who did u gave your num to this morning Me: you see that’s why people fail WAEC, what’s your name Voice: anyway sweetheart, I’m Zinat Me: I’m sorry pls, I donno u were d one. Zinat: apology accepted Me: let me call you back.. Zinat: okay (ends the call) Chai! Why am I this foolish That I said I will call her back… Questioning myself… As I load the recharge card I bought, na so the glo num call enta my phone Voice: its me bimbo that collected your num this morning Me: ah ah, okay… And pls why is your voice this sweet?? Bimbo: you don add comedy to your song abi Me: no mind me jor Bimbo: and why don’t you pick up your call the other time Me: I was playing with my dad in his room, that’s why ann I’m not with my phone!!! Bimbo: hmm hmmm, daddy’s pet Me: thanks o!!! You know what I will call you back now!!! Edited the num and saved Zinat with zinats and Bimbo with bimbos…. I then dialed my queen’s num, she didn’t even allow it to ring before picking it!!! Queen: hello Me: iyawo (wife) broda fawaz, how far Queen: I’m good As I wan talk, na so I saw my door opened with Alhaji and his koboko for hand for my door starring at me. To Be Continued

Episode 2


Queen: hello Me: iyawo (wife) broda fawaz, how far Queen: I’m good As I wan talk, na so I saw my door opened with Alhaji and his koboko for hand for my door starring at me. Me: (press the red button) Alhaji: do u know you’re a bastard?? Me: (silent) Alhaji: why don’t u wash the car I told u to wash Me: (open my mouth) Alhaji: and where is my shoe Me: I’m sorry pls.. Alhaji: it remain one time for you He left my room and I rushed out to the car, I wash am within 5 minutes then I went to where I kept the shoe and cleaned it though its still wet… After doing everything I was told to do, I went back to my room, carry my phone only to check maybe I have calls I’ve missed, as I press a button na so I saw the time was 1.15pm… Yeh, I shouted… ******** One thing about me is that I get hungry only when I see that the time is far spent… ******** I ran to the shop to ask for my food which my mum replied that I have no food to eat since I’ve collected a recharge card and I didn’t pay!!! I went back inside with frown for my face… As I was thinking of what to do, na so bimbo called again…. Bimbo: hello Me: what’s up ma Bimbo: don’t “ma” me Me: okay, no p.. Bimbo: hope u aint busy now Me: you know I’m jobless, I’m always free… Bimbo: can you text me your address? Me: I’m sorry o, what do u need it for Hope you know my papa na soldier?? Bimbo: Lolz, I’m coming over to your place ni o and I’m the only one coming…. Me: okay ma, I ll let you know when I’m free… Bimbo: thanks dear, expecting it. Me: okay, later sha!! (Cuts the phone) I decided to stroll out to see if I fit get something to chop for my street then my phone rang ‘graan graan graan’…. Alhaji again… Alhaji: come and open the gate for me Me: yes sir I went out to open the gate…. He jet out with his car then I went back to my room, I picked up my phone and text my address to bimbo…. Not up to 10mins, I heard knock on the gate… I quickly ran to open the gate for my visitor but I saw what scared me, guess what I saw Alhaji… Me: you forgot something Alhaji: yes! go and dress up, we’re going somewhere together…. Me: (suprised) but sir, I am going……. Alhaji: answer me now!!! Me: (sad) okay sir As I wan turn back to go dress up, na so I heard the gate sound saying “koo koo koo” who’s that? Alhaji shouted Emmm, its fawaz’s friend, a feminine voice replied…. I wanted to run inside to hide, na so papa called me back to open the gate… As I opened it, guess who I saw It was……. To Be Continued…

episode 3



it was Bimbo Alhaji: is this the person you’re waiting for that you didn’t want to follow me?? Anyway, no problem…. Bye…. I was relieved as I saw him jetting out of the gate, I didn’t even know what to do at that moment that I was just starring at her. Will you just stand there and be looking at me, bimbo said… I’m sorry, let’s go in…. I opened my door for her to enter then I follow suite… Bimbo: is this where your room sha? Cos I felt its too big for you…. Me: na my grandmas room, oya jor! What will you like to eat Bimbo: sorry o, I’m not taking anytin nitemi o!!! Me: u dey vex?? Okay sha, wait for me I dey come!!! Na so I dash outta d room to our shop to get bimbo drink…. Mum: you know u don collect card for morning, you still wan take drink now, where is the money Me: sheybi I never eat afternoon food…. Na my afternoon food money I dey take small small oo… Mum: no prob, take am I dey watch u As I took d drink for her freezer, I went back to the room only to meet the most surprising thing I believe it can make one go blind, Guess what? bimbo was Unclad…. Me: yeh! Mogbe oo!!! Wetin be dis? Bimbo: stop behaving like a kid jo, don’t you like what you see Me: of course, na my taste be this…. But Bimbo Before I could finished talking she don come near me and plant kiss for my lips… Believe me, that girl na usher(good kisser), her Bosom con dey rub my clad chest!!! its not up to 5seconds that I took off my cloth too… She then pushed me to bed lying on top of me, I didn’t know my forever in act jack bauer(D*ick) can stand with full force e take stand that day…. She then suddenly and surprisingly stand up to her feet pointing at my Joystick… Bimbo: ohh, its too big o… U go kill pesin for here o…. Me: I no go kill pesin, na murder I go murder pesin….. Come here jo, no be u wey turn me on That animal wey dey puma logo no fit jump with the way she jumped on me…. She swallowed my Joystick completely, I was at cloud 9 then, she sucked me ehn, that I forgot to type tindeck.com/dl/tjqvt for you…. She go spit on the Joystick, then lick am till it dries… Like a winch, I didn’t know how she sighted the milk I kept for my reading table!!! She CONTINUE READING

GBEDU WEY DEY BURST BRAIN