Here’s another one!

Just change the dates to 2019

For the business owners!

Ahnie!

Did the tips help on the potty matters?

Omonikiba how are the boys faring now?

babythug:
Ahnie!

Did the tips help on the potty matters?

Omonikiba how are the boys faring now?

My dear...my Bobo didn't succumbed to any.
I ve started wearing him diapers again..... he's so ashamed to be seen in diapers.
Whenever he needs to wee...he brings his Willie out,but still poos in the diaper.

I cannot come n keel myself!

Hi everyone! How are preparations for year end and indeed decade end going?

What is worth doing is worth doing well.

Remember leave nothing to chance and plan ahead as best as you can; be firm and resolute about living intentionally henceforth particularly as it may concern your self, spouse (where applicable) and children!

Thought to share a few tips for managing domestic staff even as many of us will be changing hands in this period and perhaps early next year!

Firstly you as the employer/madam/Aunty be sure of what you are looking for with the person to be brought into your home ie define your expectations. Is it a house manager- shows initiative, friendly, corporate; a maid -does chores and moves as directed ; a nanny - focuses on children and children related matters? A combination of all?

Next is be prayerful during your search ask for God’s guidance in your eventual choice

Be organised . Be assertive and firm

Run your home somewhat like an office or organisation. Define your policies and ensure who ever you’re engaging is aware of it. Let them know the no of meals they’re allowed to have, quantity , what they can freely access or not eg your soups or stews. Ensure their meal portions are within reason not that they will pile their plates high and end of discarding left overs!

Keep stock of your kitchen and store. This will help check wastefulness (as they may be wont to if you allow) and theft too! Do a count or measure of items as best as you can. You can use apps or an excel sheet. It will help your finances too!

Define what areas of your home are within their reach as well. As much as it’s good to be “free” with domestics you just must be careful not to get completely carried away and completely drop all guard. Not all of them can be completely entrusted no matter how you perceive your relationship to be wonderful.

As soon as you determine weakness and strengths of their characters and abilities be sure to work within those and find ways round the rest.

Define phone and TV times in as much as “they’re now like family” they are also at work and boundaries must be set to avoid overfamiliarity breeding contempt type of matters!

Good luck and hope this helps!

Feel free to add more

cC: mamatwiny

Hello babythug...
My chibobo has stopped pooping on himself...
I woke them up around 4 a.m to bathe them...after bathing them,i went into serious talks with him...more like rants...

I burst into tears..it was really frustrating seeing him defecating on himself.
So boo told me not to cry again...that he would change

When my husband brought them to me later...he walked up to me and told me to help pull his trousers down that he wants to poop.

Jesus! I was over excited... we're on day 2 of not pooping on ourselves...lolz

It's really a big deal to me .... we're getting better.

Thanks babes

ahnie:
Hello babythug...
My chibobo has stopped pooping on himself...
I woke them up around 4 a.m to bathe them...after bathing them,i went into serious talks with him...more like rants...

I burst into tears..it was really frustrating seeing him defecating on himself.
So boo told me not to cry again...that he would change

When my husband brought them to me later...he walked up to me and told me to help pull his trousers down that he wants to poop.

Jesus! I was over excited... we're on day 2 of not pooping on ourselves...lolz

It's really a big deal to me .... we're getting better.

Thanks babes

That’s good news!! I wish Nairaland had the clapping emojis!

I wish you all the best of this season and the new year to come!!

Happy new year everyone! May it be truly
Glorious for each and everyone of us!

Can’t believe I have not been here in over a month and in this fantastic 2020 for that matter! Lots going on behind the scenes!

I trust the vision boards are all up and running? To hit goals both small and big it’s important to have it documented and constantly in one’s line of sight ie to see/view it often. It’ll also help to keep the Adrenalin pumping.

Family wise what are you doing differently?

Last year I succeeded in trimming my shouting and smacking to an absolute minimum, hoping to get it Eradicated this year so help me Lord! If I can surely you can too, smacking, shouting or hitting toddlers isn’t always the way forward! There are other means to get this parenting done.

Many of us have new maids now, how are they settling in? Remember to keep your eyes open and be prayerful. Have minimal expectations and define their roles clearly! Cut them some slack they are human too! One tip I’ve recently discovered which also helps to keep one on top of stuff is to have an inventory of your pantry. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before. Use an excel sheet or an app(I’m sure there’ll be one) to document groceries and so on. Check it weekly or monthly. It’ll help you plan your shopping and also help with accounting. You’d know or have an idea of how many tins of milo you’re actually buying in a month etc etc. My former boss says his wife doesn’t even open shopping bags when he buys she just asks the maid to store. So she literally doesn’t know what’s at home or not at home for all they care the maid may have been wasteful or just converted some of the toddler bits and bobs for her own personal use!

What’s the plan for growing wealth or saving more this year? Even as a stay at home mum , there is a need to set aside something little in case of emergencies, doesn’t have to be big at first! Even as little as N1000 a month is a start.

Hope these our toddlers teachers aren’t driving us nuts with homework this year God will help us with all this “curve and dash” we have to keep writing all the time *sighs*

Let me run off , got a ton of chores to sort today!

You just had to shade the teachers

zaynie:
You just had to shade the teachers

When “they” keep traumatising us with curve and dash nko?


You Kuku know if not for una many of us will have been returned to our parents for not understanding ABD

Is anyone making any special valentine plans?
Care to share?

Doesn’t even have to elaborate or expensive! I’m sure the gesture will make one’s spouse really happy.

Could be as basic as cooking a special meal -that day or adding a bottle of wine/fresh juice to the meal .
Bring out your special China dishes, new napkins, add scented candles to the table set up!
Get the kids into bed early and wear something nice.
Change your bedsheets or buy a new one! Clear up the clutter (covers face here as per guilty of cluttered room right now). Burn scented candles that day and use loads of air freshener.

Lagos traffic is likely to irritate us all more that day so let’s just make the best of everything.

But suya and or asun maybe even roasted fish. Ensure there’s ijebu garri and ice block available. Chill wine and juice.

Even if you don’t have mind blowing se.xxxx that day just make it special anyway you can

Good luck

I have plans.

We don't normally celebrate Val's day because we feel it is a commercial construct but I want to surprise him this weekend.

We plan on going out with the kids somewhere fun the next day. I want to decorate our room with all those Valentine decor, roll a joint, wear my sexy police costume and have fun.

Wish I could film his surprise.

blank:
I have plans.

We don't normally celebrate Val's day because we feel it is a commercial construct but I want to surprise him this weekend.

We plan on going out with the kids somewhere fun the next day. I want to decorate our room with all those Valentine decor, roll a joint, wear my sexy police costume and have fun.

Wish I could film his surprise.

Sounds really nice!

Didn’t see food anywhere in the plans oh, he will need strength for all the police work ahead

Me, i have bought an aphrodisiac and I am test running it this weekend.
I'll drop my kids with my mom.
I have ulterior motives sha, I need the chop money to increase this year


Wish me luck

babythug:


Sounds really nice!

Didn’t see food anywhere in the plans oh, he will need strength for all the police work ahead

The going out should have that part covered. Cooking stresses me out.

zaynie:
Me, i have bought an aphrodisiac and I am test running it this weekend.
I'll drop my kids with my mom.
I have ulterior motives sha, I need the chop money to increase this year


Wish me luck

Good luck sis. I dey feel you.

zaynie:
Me, i have bought an aphrodisiac and I am test running it this weekend.
I'll drop my kids with my mom.
I have ulterior motives sha, I need the chop money to increase this year


Wish me luck

Is your “insurance” intact madam We don’t want stories that touch the heart oh! Na only chop money be the mission this weekend oh!

Good luck

blank:


Good luck sis. I dey feel you.

We have to come back and compare notes.
May the force be with us

babythug:


Is your “insurance” intact madam We don’t want stories that touch the heart oh! Na only chop money be the mission this weekend oh!

Good luck

Mama why you mention insurance, now you don dey make me fear

zaynie:



Mama why you mention insurance, now you don dey make me fear

No fear Jare! We still
Stand behind you gidigba �

Just double check that the “insurance” is well fitted that’s all!

Hope valentine has cleared from people’s eyes *coughs*

Tomorrow is Monday. Go and sort your wardrobe for the week and for the children too! I’ve met a couple of folks who do this and say it works and really helps ease the flow during the week. One even said she tries on all the combos just to be sure none is missing a button etc etc

Is your to -do list for home and work done? Get up from your bed and do it!

Is it midterm week from school? How will the children be engaged or is the plan tv, tv and more tv?

Did you bulk cook or valentine happened?

Have a great week people!

P.S- Zaynie and blank e never do una?

babythug:
Hope valentine has cleared from people’s eyes *coughs*

Tomorrow is Monday. Go and sort your wardrobe for the week and for the children too! I’ve met a couple of folks who do this and say it works and really helps ease the flow during the week. One even said she tries on all the combos just to be sure none is missing a button etc etc

Is your to -do list for home and work done? Get up from your bed and do it!

Is it midterm week from school? How will the children be engaged or is the plan tv, tv and more tv?

Did you bulk cook or valentine happened?

Have a great week people!

P.S- Zaynie and blank e never do una?

Maami, I've gone to do rough play, Sha put me in your prayers.

In other news, chop money has gone up, not to the amount I wanted but at least it shifted.

Blank, come up for air na, tomorrow is Monday

This weekend was just the bestest. Everything panned out perfectly.
I am now the proud owner of a "blank cheque".

My eldest is going through one kind of phase that i don't understand. He has always been someone that needs plenty reminders and constant nagging before he conforms. Now, it's like he doesn't even care anymore. Like he's done trying. He's just 9.

blank:
My eldest is going through one kind of phase that i don't understand. He has always been someone that needs plenty reminders and constant nagging before he conforms. Now, it's like he doesn't even care anymore. Like he's done trying. He's just 9.

Oh dear!
Maybe your method was hard?

Have you tried just talking about his feelings on the subject?

Or maybe he just needs everyone to back off for a bit

blank:
This weekend was just the bestest. Everything panned out perfectly.
I am now the proud owner of a "blank cheque".

Ah no wonder you went MIA!

Torh how do we work out our own share now? As per supporters club

blank:
This weekend was just the bestest. Everything panned out perfectly.
I am now the proud owner of a "blank cheque".

I'm proud of you my sister.

Happy new month everyone!

We are marching forward victorious in all areas of our lives!

We will discuss no 8 (below) in length this week God willing

Aloha !

So much cobwebs everywhere *coughs*

These issues of life that take one away from extra curricular commitments sha I should do better really!

Much stuff to share but today what brings me here is something perhaps peculiar to many homes and I’m seeking answers/solutions to the matter.


Let me title it “ Rising above *see finish* in marriage - particularly for the unemployed Mrs “

I’d be back with some ideas!

babythug:
Zaynie

Alphahandmaiden

Onegai

Liftedhands

Helovesme

Sayoberry

Fortius

Mitchyy

Oya oh come and knack teeth here

miss all the mama's that year I heard my first baby

My thoughts on the see finish matter primarily stem from my direct experience and a thread I recently stumbled on here on Nairaland. It was a fun thread directed to unemployed husbands but really ministered to my soul lol

I’m sure at one point or the other our husbands have made statements or given off vibes that largely can be categorised under “see finish” this is to help forestall or perhaps eradicate see finish.

It usually happens to stay at home/ in between jobs wives . The world is merciless to those in that category honestly. One would imagine the poor wife is enjoying not having financial independence.

1. The first tip is to realise that you are not alone. Many a wife has experienced and survived plus overcome this see finish of a thing.
2. One of the many loop holes that could lead you to be the butt of your Nigerian husband’s bad mouth is to be generally unorganised .
2a. You must be on top of your game at all times. Depending on the age (s) of your children this could be a Herculean task but it is achievable nonetheless
b. By putting a few measures in place , running your home could become seamless and almost professional!
c. Firstly list all chores that need to be done in your home . Separate into Quarterly, monthly, weekly and daily. Print and stick it up where you can see it and follow through. The internet - Pinterest has many of such lists that can be modified and so on
3. Your appearance is crucial to the recovery process. I do understand that you’re home a lot and of course want to be comfortable but don’t slip up and be looking so ragged your man just sees you as part of the furniture in the house. Dress as neatly as possible. Where money is a constraint get your hair neatly packed or woven into cornrows ALL the time. Even if your husband returns late as much as you can try to still be properly dressed till he’s home. When he returns and meets you in a wrapper you further assert that there’s not much to your general daily life .
4. When you hear your husband’s car drive in or his knock at the door, change the channel to news or national geographic or a religious programme. Try to move away from that stereotype or narrative that unemployed wives do nothing but watch Zee world and African magic. Not like there’s anything wrong with watching those channels though but these are avenues for “ see finish”
5. Streamline collecting funds for household needs to weekly, bi-weekly or monthly . It’ll reduce the “you people are eating a lot oh” face/statements and help you plan/ manage your affairs better . It’s also more dignifying than telling him while he’s dressing for work that soup has finished and you need to buy some cereal for junior !
6. As much as is within your power feed your toddlers before your spouse returns. All that shouting at junior to eat quickly and so on doesn’t help your PR at all.
7. Coordinate your maid/help/ dependant in likewise manner as above. Minimise interactions with your maid once father is back . Your yelling at “njideka” or sending her on different errands doesn’t always help your PR. This depends of course but you get the general drift. Some are known to be more sloppy once father is back to eke out some “pity” or attention from father. This is not in everybody’s home oh!
8. Communicate to your family that certain expenses you’d no longer be able to bear until your finances improve. Except in dire situations like a health related matter do not pass your family bills/expenses onto your husband . It’ll mostly come back to bite you in the face. Brace yourself up to pass up a few aso ebi and the likes for this reason too

9. Ensure dinner is ready by 6pm. Don’t be caught cooking when oga is driving in. Join in the meal and make It as glamorous as is within your means . Use nice plates and trays.

10. Do not make the mistake of telling him what the neighbours/landlord did or didn’t do. As sweet as the gist could be it does make your unemployed state further visible as per you’re so jobless you have time for idle chatter.

11. Pick up a hobby to fill in the time - crocheting , gardening, reading , online courses anything so you don’t completely lose your intellectual identity.

12. Put your phone away for a little bit when he gets back . Don’t let it be so obvious that you’re on social media at every spare moment you have
13. Out of every money he gives you, keep a little . It doesn’t matter if it is N100.
14. Once in a while dress up very early , wear a corporate outfit and knack shoes and tell oga you’re expecting a call from one place that you applied to ( you get the general idea) . Even if you only stroll to the bus stop or the next street sha form busy .

graciamore:
miss all the mama's that year I heard my first baby