tttmar:
Good morning my people, please I want your advice about my marriage. I and my husband got married 2008 and we have three children.
In 2012, he married another wife, after 3 years he married the third wife between those periods he was physically abusing me so I had to pack to my parents house for almost a year.
He would be coming to my parents house begging and even going to our neighbours to help him apologise on his behalf, so at that time I was working because of my children we both gathered money and rent another house.
He doesn't like given out is money, I will have to talk and talk before he will give his children feeding allowance, you can imagine he gives us N200 for feeding allowance everyday,even to pay NEPA Bill is problem, he is very strict about money, whenever the children need anything, he always tell them that he doesn't have money, because of his behaviour the other wives have packed out from their houses.
Presently we are owing one year house rent and I don't have a job yet, I am an Accounting graduate, please what should I do, it is even difficult for me to allow another man touch me and also I am considering my children. I don't want to go back to my parents house, neighbours will say she has come back again. Even to give me N100,I will have to beg for one hour I am really frustrated and any time I complain about his behaviour, he will just be laughing at me.

EagleScribes:



If you can do everything you can, get some money and start a business. If you have a good computer and Internet, there are things that you can do from home

thorpido:
You may have to go back to your parents' house.Turn deaf ears to whatever neighbours say.
Look for a job or try to run a business.Use the time you spend with your parents to evaluate your life and your so-called marriage.Ask yourself if there are chances of the man and the marriage improving.
By the way,do the other wives have children and did they leave with them?

Donald3d:
Hmm,na small thing na
1.Don't ask him for anything again


2.Go back to your parents house for the time being

3.Ignore what anybody says about you,its just words learn to suck it up

4.While you are with your parents ,look for a job

5.Also learn skills that would bring in money

6.Pay more attention to your children

7.No matter what ,tell God all your problems.
Thank you, sometimes I would make up my mind that I will not ask anything from him but since I don't have a job, I will be forced to do so.
Another reason why I don't want to go to my parents house is that they also find it difficult to eat and sometimes if I am there some creditors will come and be shouting so I don't want to compound their problems.

Funkybabee:
You too leave with your children and go out to hustle,ur children future is wat matter they also leave for thier children not to steal or become useless in the street find where your children can live,if its with ur parent do so and go out and find a decent work,u have a qualification nah and if u can defend it all will be well for you pls for the sake of ur children find means to take care of them lack of things turn children to something else may God be with you and be prayerful I don't know if u are a christian or muslim but u need prayer in ur situation....


All is well ma,some man are so useless like poo so sorry for saying this ooo....I just hate to see strong woman suffering

tttmar:

Thank you very much, actually I have tried applying for jobs online and also I go to companies to submit my CVs but people are saying that If I don't know people,they will just put it in one corner.
Sometimes without transport fare, I will be going to companies by foot, the next day I will not be able to work well.
The reason why I don't just want to put my children somewhere is because they are females and I don't want them to be molested.

tttmar:

Thank you very much, actually I have tried applying for jobs online and also I go to companies to submit my CVs but people are saying that If I don't know people,they will just put it in one corner.
Sometimes without transport fare, I will be going to companies by foot, the next day I will not be able to work well.
The reason why I don't just want to put my children somewhere is because they are females and I don't want them to be molested.

Funkybabee:




My sister keep trying God will shower u his mercy my advie for you is to print ur cv much,go to those companies u know and trust that they are doing well,online stuff might take some times before getting back and if u apply in person their might be some vacancy that they wont want to ask u for cuz of ur qualification,but if u go they might ask u if u don't mind and u will be there managing till ur time comes...I know things will be better for you and your children by Christ sake....And for your children its ain't easy to leave them because of their gender just try to keep the work balance with them
Thank you very much, God bless you.

ECRFngo:
This is a case Esther Child Rights Foundation cherish most. Dear are u in Lagos? If yes pls come to our office because this is a case of abandonment which is against the law. We have handled cases that are worst than yours. Domestic violence, child abuse, rape related cases, anything human rights we are here to fight and get justice.

tttmar:

Yes, I live in Lagos please help me because I am frustrated.

crackhaus:

You're a graduate of accounting living in Lagos. Get your updated CV and submit them in the head offices of major banks, you can start with Sterling Towers.
Depending on how old you are, you may not be elligible for an entry level graduate trainee job but you just have to try first.

tttmar:

I am 33 years, most of the banks look for younger graduates.

crackhaus:

Yes they do, but only for entry level positions. I assume you have at least one relevant work experience that spans more than a year.

Send your CV to documentation@solnigeria.com

tttmar:

Yes, I live in Lagos please help me because I am frustrated.

sammydirectly:
Leave that house ASAP.
Go to your parents house, get something doing and make sure you can boast of at least 3 years house rent worth of money in your account. Then get a place for yourself

edoman2016:

State your qualification, class of degree and university.