im a 30 year old man from the eastern part of nigeria.i have been dating this lady for 4 years now.recently i started thinking about marriage so i told her my mind by proposin to her which she accepted.i work with 1st generation bank with mangable income for about 5 years . i currently live with my parents and i use my mother's car.this implies i need to get my acommodation a car and wedding expenses.

based on my savings i showed her my budget for the above as follow:
1.2bed room aparment
2.2001 corolla
3.1.5million for the wedding ceremonies
4.250k for honeymoon
all the above would cost me about 4million

but to my chagrin,this lady who is an unemployed graduate of 2years me blatantly that i am not ready to marry. reason to be given later.

****pls read my subsequent replies

bigass:

im a 30 year old man from the eastern part of nigeria.i have been dating this lady for 4 years now.recently i started thinking about marriage so i told her my mind i proposed to her agreed to marrying me.i work with 1st generation bank with mangable income for about 5 years . i currently live with my parents and i use my mother's car.this implies i need to get my acommodation a car and wedding expenses.

based on my savings i showed her my budget for the above as follow:
1.2bed room aparment
2.2001 corolla
3.1.5million for the wedding ceremonies
4.350k for honey money
all the above would cost me about 4million

but to my chagrin,this lady who is an unemployed graduate of 2years me blatantly that i am not ready to marry. reason to be given later.

Lmao!!

Oops!

Tell the lady in question to shove her sheeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiit where the sun dont shine. Considering the current economic climate your budget is on point. Why break a leg or two for a wedding that is just one day eh?

tell her since she said u aint ready, let her make u ready by giving you the money, nonsense, how many guys are thinking of marriage, she shld be happy you want to marry her sef

her reasons are these
that she cant leave in 2 bedroom but 3bedroom
that corolla 2001 is too old/small but something like 2008
and that i want to disgrace her with wedding plan of  1.5million.


*she is ibo too so the whole burden is on me.she is jobless.i am very confused i need help!

The girl no serious, she never ready. How many guys get time/money to marry now? Jump am pass.

@ poster, where do u guys live as in what state?

well she might be right that you are not ready i mean why would anyone want to marry a jobless person who is demanding

anyway yes dump her ass

@poster

this is a very funny stuffs here.

1: well no harm in 2bedroom but this are what you should consider before renting an apartment, eg. how long you intend living there, will you be having househelp, when you have kids and have visitors staying the night as well. those needs to be considered well. i did this before i got my place .

2: that lady is a very materialistic person. for one day 1.5million if its inclusive of traditional marriage then that ok. not too bad. infact as you said she is unemployed then i expected her t have sympathy and be reasonable. either she likes it or lumps it, my guy you try welllwell ooo.

3: regarding the car, infact sef you try well well, if i be you after all the expenses na to cut cost na im go dey my mind, just arrange small bulldog or altima 2000 model and save the rest of your money becos if she knows how to drive then fine but if not, think about after spending som much on the car she come take am go bash person nko wetin go happen ? If thats what you have to buy a car tell her thats what you have and as earlier said if she doesnt like it, she can either take the bus, brt, danfo, molue, brt, okada , napep. she has plenty options or better still trek.

4:honeymoon you try sef. how many couples nowadays dey go honeymoon again sef, na to just go, olumo rock abi go one of these tourist attraction for lagos or better still stay indoors, eat, sleep, and enjoy each others company.

The balls is in your court. NOE: tribe has nothing to do with the issue at hand its the girl in person tht has issues and you should be very careful. although women want their wedding day to be all that but you call still do all that with limited funds. make her realise una no go drink garri after marriage.

She must be sniffing something! she's not even contributing anything.Send her PACKING!
A parasite she is.

Guy u self,person no dey contribute,stil tell u say u no dey ready to marry,and after marriage hope U stil get better 4 account,cos d'nt expect her to chop garri with you,abeg use ur head jor.

Guy u self,person no dey contribute,stil tell u say u no dey ready to marry,and after marriage hope U stil get better 4 account,cos d'nt expect her to chop garri with you,abeg use ur head jor.

Guy u self,person no dey contribute,stil tell u say u no dey ready to marry,and after marriage hope U stil get better 4 account,cos d'nt expect her to chop garri with you!abeg use ur head jor.

she should wait for one of Adenuga pikin or better still go hug Transformer, i would rather put that amount in my business, nonsense

Shola2009:

She must be sniffing something! she's not even contributing anything.Send her PACKING!
A parasite she is.

u took the wordss outta me!



1.5milllion naira for marriage
that is too much ooh!

very funny,did this really happen?

am overwhelmed with everybody's outpouring of comments.i am really grateful.

this below is her reasonsher reasons are these

that she cant leave in 2 bedroom but 3bedroom
that corolla 2001 is too old/small but something like 2008
and that i want to disgrace her with wedding plan of 1.5million.


*she is ibo too so the whole burden is on me.she is jobless.i am very confused i need help

to be frank with everybody in my heart of heart ,my desire and real capability is to spent about 2million for the house car and wedding but because of her displeasure each time i make this known to her.so i decided to delay and probably do some runs to shore my capital to this amount.after this nothing will be in my account.i really wish i could please myself because this is what i am really confortable with. i feel heavily burdened i love her and want to marry.i cant date 2 girls simultaneously but never felt i wish i had someone else any other time than now.thanks you all.

Pls leave this gal you are highly favoured among men that she has shown you her true self,unless you have an early death wish.Consider this when you marry her and cnt keep up with her neds this gal talking this is going to cheat on you just to look good and carry designer bags.

Bro 2 start with she aint working & shes a high maintenance chick @ d same time. ur budget is way 2 high. wht exactly do u need a car 4 (ds early) or y spend 1.5 on a wedding? na sand u chop afta 4get bout d car(4 now til ur finances improve). keep d 2 bedroom flat on d list, budget lik .9m 4 d wedding. if she doesnt lik it she should take a hike. any other thing she wants she will hv 2 provide. NONSENSE. mcheeewwww.

Unfortunately you've just opened a can of worms for yourself. You shouldnt have exposed here to your finance matters at at all. She is suppose to marry you for the love first and now you've brought a complext dynamic into this before the marriage itself. The risk here is that this marriage might end up being based on the money factor and the love secondary. She may have done you a huge favour cos' now she needs to find a job and perhaps money will no longer be the detrmining factor as whether you two should be married or not.

I find it difficult to comment on her response because I do not know the spirit and the demeanour in which the feedback was delivered.

well if you'll ask me
*thinking*
Run for your life,

Nwoke m abeg take to your heels, in fact leave your heels and take off!!!! Mark my words this woman can only bring you misery so please BREAK IT OFF!!!!!! What arrant rubbish! Any woman that truly loves you would support you and not say such rubbish like 1.5m is a disgraceful amount for a wedding. So if you lose your job and can not afford some of the good things of life that you can afford now what happens?This woman is NOT WIFE MATERIAL!Do you realise that she is telling you to live above your means?? Such a woman would encourage you to steal all in a bid to keep up with the jonses. My guy a word is enough for the wise. Break off the relationship today, in fact call her and break it off this minute.

i think she just have dreams which she had held on for long about what she wants.she is not in tune with realty just tell her you cannot satisfy her needs break up with her.you need to move on.marriage is not based on assumption and illusions and desires but realities.she might not be an all-weather women.run for your life

Is she high on WEED? Bro abeg flag down the nearest bike and run. I tot the real life strts after d ceremony so what will u live on after this she had better get a life or better stil a knife or go jump off 3rd mainland bridge. nonsense (i hiss in chinese)

Issues like this keeps me wondering, why naija men will be with lazy ass women, who will just be sitting at home and be expecting one man to provide for everything and still be ungrateful at the same time.
My guy listen, if you marry this your woman, you will be living in practically a MINI-HELL, There are so many hard working Nigerian girls, who have been well bought up and you can marry and build a wonderful home with, as in you can trust them with everything.
But this your woman i am sure she bullies you, you pay her salary every month, you will have to beg a 100 times before you have intimacy.

My Guy Dump the Liability and look for A beautiful Nigeria woman in MIND SOUL and BODY.

this story reminds me of a friend who got married while staying in a one bedroom self contained apartment.he had no car nothing just TV and a small fridge.what made his story worth telling is that he is from a poor to fair background while the girl not only that she's from a rich background but extremely beautiful.i went to greet them some  days after wedding she was so full of smiles in their humble home.i was amazed.now they have a baby girl

Honestly, Bigass, you are a very nice guy and very caring too. You are too good for her. I think she's aware of your caring nature and eagerness to please her, that's why she's doing shakara. How many men will draw up such budget for their future and show it to the future partner to approve it? Especially when she's not contributing anything! I don't know what to advice you because asking you to dump her is destructive. Maybe you should sit her down and talk some sense into her head!

never marry a jobless girl, they r not useful