MarieSucre:


You have seen many situations of controlling women yet none of millions of situations of controlling men enough to post on nairaland. All the ones that threw their wives out with all her property and her children, you didn't see those ones

What manner of selective hypocrisy is this?

If you notice something you don't like, It's your choice to be proactive about it. We are over 160m+ in Nigeria, I am sure they are a lot of men who would love to live with you in your house. As for me i wouldn't even be in that scenario in the first place, Because from the very very beginning before love starts clouding our judgement i have already drop the relationship or improvised. A man that will likely throw you out of his house you will know from some little actions and you shouldn't even be serious with the relationship in the first place. That's being proactive. I am quite aware of men throwing out women from their house and that's despicable but it's you women job to be proactive about it so you don't end up in such relationship just like it's my job to be proactive about living in a shelter built by a woman. Understand?

Idrismusty97:
If you notice something you don't like, It's your choice to be proactive about it. We are over 160m+ in Nigeria, I am sure they are a lot of men who would love to live with you in your house. As for me i wouldn't even be in that scenario in the first place, Because from the very very beginning before love starts clouding our judgement i have already drop the relationship or improvised. A man that will likely throw you out of his house you will know from some little actions and you shouldn't even be serious with the relationship in the first place. That's being proactive. I am quite aware of men throwing out women from their house and that's despicable but it's you women job to be proactive about it so you don't end up in such relationship just like it's my job to be proactive about living in a shelter built by a woman. Understand?

You do realise people can change after 20 years of marriage right and that most time during the dating period, people pretend and hide their true selves. So what happens when you're already married?

MarieSucre:


Must he live at his wife's house to support the notion? Thats like saying one must be Fulani to talk about grazing rights.

Well he sound as if he has experienced living with a woman in her house so i want to hear his side of his story. But it seems even he wouldn't do that and all those yarn is just forming rational and just saying what every women want to hear.

MarieSucre:


You do realise people can change after 20 years of marriage right and that most time during the dating period, people pretend and hide their true selves. So what happens when you're already married?

Exactly! People can change after 20 years. That's exactly why i wouldn't move in a house my wife built. I am glad you get my point.

Idrismusty97:
Exactly! People can change after 20 years. That's exactly why i wouldn't move in a house my wife built. I am glad you get my point.

What if your wife uses that logic and is scared of moving into your personal house, how do you resolve that?

Because honestly there is not guarantee you won't change, marry another 2 wives and chase her out.

fuckupnation:


No very bad to move in a woman house married or not, unless you don't have your own single rooms. i ma a witness, only that my wife pay our house rent for two years. i saw hell, she treating to end the marriage and throw me out. But God save me, before the divorce i already pay house rent and when her people come to help her divorce the marriage i am already in new house. that's when she bergs for forgiveness.

I wish some nincumpu would learn from this, women can be very difficult especially when they have the upper hand in relation only a handful would keep a low profile

MarieSucre:


What if your wife uses that logic and is scared of moving into your personal house, how do you resolve that?

Because honestly there is not guarantee you won't change, marry another 2 wives and chase her out.

Good. Now she can use that logic to build her own house, It's a free world. But i and our kids wouldn't move in with her. I will even support her if possible, I love an independent successful woman but our African tradition won't just allow a man to move into a woman's house. So what would she do with her own personal house? As an expert in the construction industry i will advice her to bring in tenants or sell the house for a much higher price and build another one. Whatever way she chooses she can run an estate business, Just like my mom. But that didn't stop her from living in the same house with my dad. So 20 years after we married if i chase her out she have House(S) and assets she could move to or sustain herself. It's a Win-Win situation.

P.S With the assets my mom now have she could sustain not only herself but the whole family and frequently sponsor my siblings and relatives for masters programs and businesses. But that didn't stop her from living with my dad. That's the kind of woman i will marry.

MarieSucre:


Don't mind him. Which of the Nigerian Civil War commanders were women. Some of them were just 26 or 27 years of age when they caused the death of millions. Indeed men handle power better my foot.

Nobody does. Don't throw stones in a glass house.

military power is way different from relationship

Idrismusty97:
Good. Now she can use that logic to build her own house, It's a free world. But i and our kids wouldn't move in with her. I will even support her if possible, I love an independent successful woman but our African tradition won't just allow a man to move into a woman's house. So what would she do with her own personal house? As an expert in the construction industry i will advice her to bring in tenants or sell the house for a much higher price and build another one. Whatever way she chooses she can run an estate business, Just like my mom. But that didn't stop her from living in the same house with my dad. So 20 years after we married if i chase her out she have House(S) and assets she could move to or sustain herself. It's a Win-Win situation.

P.S With the assets my mom now have she could sustain not only herself but the whole family and frequently sponsor my siblings and relatives for masters programs and businesses. But that didn't stop her from living with my dad. That's the kind of woman i will marry.

I see nothing to quarrel with here. As long as a woman has her independent property that the man does not try to control, and you he does not try to Lord over the fact that it her house.

But one last thing, a woman has more control over the kids than you do. Don't try to play smart or you'll suffer.

Idrismusty97:
Good. Now she can use that logic to build her own house, It's a free world. But i and our kids wouldn't move in with her. I will even support her if possible, I love an independent successful woman but our African tradition won't just allow a man to move into a woman's house. So what would she do with her own personal house? As an expert in the construction industry i will advice her to bring in tenants or sell the house for a much higher price and build another one. Whatever way she chooses she can run an estate business, Just like my mom. But that didn't stop her from living in the same house with my dad. So 20 years after we married if i chase her out she have House(S) and assets she could move to or sustain herself. It's a Win-Win situation.

P.S With the assets my mom now have she could sustain not only herself but the whole family and frequently sponsor my siblings and relatives for masters programs and businesses. But that didn't stop her from living with my dad. That's the kind of woman i will marry.

this is an example of a real man

King44:
military power is way different from relationship

How is it different when showing how bad men are at abusing small power given compared to women. Please tell me.

Idrismusty97:
Well he sound as if he has experienced living with a woman in her house so i want to hear his side of his story. But it seems even he wouldn't do that and all those yarn is just forming rational and just saying what every women want to hear.

Again you've not answered my question, why does he have to to make that point?

King44:
I wish some nincumpu would learn from this, women can be very difficult especially when they have the upper hand in relation only a handful would keep a low profile

As opposed to men who threaten to throw their wives out of the house and talk about how they paid their bride price and are feeding them at any slight provocation.

The hypocrisy of you men is astounding.

MarieSucre:

How is it different when showing how bad men are at abusing small power given compared to women. Please tell me.

do you know that if women were among the past military leaders in this country things would have gotten worse, take an instance of diezeni and Co just when we think men are good at stealing public funds she and other women proved they are expert and genius at it

A man should be a man and start within his means no matter what she says about i will pay or i will contribute. With what we see today about we women, please, the man should have his own house no matter how little the room is. If the man doesn't have shame, let him be told by the woman or her family that he is a gold digger and get pushed out of the house at midnight. If the man have self respect he should not move into a woman's house.

MarieSucre:


I see nothing to quarrel with here. As long as a woman has her independent property that the man does not try to control, and you he does not try to Lord over the fact that it her house.

But one last thing, a woman has more control over the kids than you do. Don't try to play smart or you'll suffer.

Having control of the kids goes both ways and most times depends on the kids themselves and how mature they are, But that's a topic for another day. And i won't lord over a woman property/assets i didn't contribute 1kobo too. That's despicable.

CioAngels:
A man should be a man and start within his means no matter what she says about i will pay or i will contribute. With what we see today about we women, please, the man should have his own house no matter how little the room is. If the man doesn't have shame, let him be told by the woman or her family that he is a gold digger and get pushed out of the house at midnight. If the man have self respect he should not move into a woman's house.

Exactly!

MarieSucre:


As opposed to men who threaten to throw their wives out of the house and talk about how they paid their bride price and are feeding them at any slight provocation.

The hypocrisy of you men is astounding.

just a handful of men would threaten to throw their wives out at the slightest provocation compared to the population of married men out there, also it is rare to hear a man rant over bride price, if he doesn't pay her wife's bride prize who does such man expects to pay it n to even brag abt it is a disgrace, if a man does not Fred his wife especially when things are going well and another man outside is busy secretly feeding are both food and money wise and the other way wise such man should not be angry he just got served those are his responsibility, when a woman is upright in doing only a mentally unstable man would threaten to throw his wife out of their house

Emma1Oj:
if its a rented apartment the man should take responsibility of the rent with immediate effect but if the wife built it with money the woman should handover the document of the house to the man.

Just like that?

MarieSucre:


As opposed to men who threaten to throw their wives out of the house and talk about how they paid their bride price and are feeding them at any slight provocation.

The hypocrisy of you men is astounding.

lol

King44:
do you know that if women were among the past military leaders in this country things would have gotten worse, take an instance of diezeni and Co just when we think men are good at stealing public funds she and other women proved they are expert and genius at it

Things would have gotten worse? Than the trillions of Maura that Abacha stole, than the thousands of people that Babangida killed.

Your argument is just plain ridiculous, that's like saying Aguiyi Ironsi was igbo and look at how he ruled Nigeria hence Igbos cannot handle power neglecting the fact that if we were to use that logic truthfully, we have been ruled by tens of northerners and it was decidedly worse. Now replace Igbo with women and Northerners and truly see your folly.

No matter how many women you put on the table, the amount of men on that table currently "who cannot handle power" as you accuse women of, will smash that table into oblivion.

p.s I don't believe any tribe can handle power better, same with gender.

King44:
just a handful of men would threaten to throw their wives out at the slightest provocation compared to the population of married men out there, also it is rare to hear a man rant over bride price, if he doesn't pay her wife's bride prize who does such man expects to pay it n to even brag abt it is a disgrace, if a man does not Fred his wife especially when things are going well and another man outside is busy secretly feeding are both food and money wise and the other way wise such man should not be angry he just got served those are his responsibility, when a woman is upright in doing only a mentally unstable man would threaten to throw his wife out of their house

Just a handful of men!!!!


Guy why are you lying nah! Even on this forum, guys that are not married and don't even have an apartment, will be threatening girls that if they dare do this or that, they will send them packing back to their fathers house.

I cannot continue chatting with a Lai Mohammed like you. Goodbye.

MarieSucre:

Things would have gotten worse? Than the trillions of Maura that Abacha stole, than the thousands of people that Babangida killed.

Your argument is just plain ridiculous, that's like saying Aguiyi Ironsi was igbo and look at how he ruled Nigeria hence Igbos cannot handle power neglecting the fact that if we were to use that logic truthfully, we have been ruled by tens of northerners and it was decidedly worse. Now replace Igbo with women and Northerners and truly see your folly.

No matter how many women you put on the table, the amount of men on that table currently "who cannot handle power" as you accuse women of, will smash that table into oblivion.

p.s I don't believe any tribe can handle power better, same with gender.

that is why I said political power should not be compared to that of relationship but still men are to some extent better at handling power than women finito

King44:
that is why I said political power should not be compared to that of relationship but still men are to some extent better at handling power than women finito

Again how is it different? Outline the fight difference?

How are they better?

MarieSucre:


Just a handful of men!!!!


Guy why are you lying nah! Even on this forum, guys that are not married and don't even have an apartment, will be threatening girls that if they dare do this or that, they will send them packing back to their fathers house.

I cannot continue chatting with a Lai Mohammed like you. Goodbye.

lool... they don't mean it they are just flexing their muscle, nairaland men are caring patient u just don't know

King44:
lool... they don't mean it they are just flexing their muscle, nairaland men are caring patient u just don't know

Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. Enough said.

AmazonTopaz:

This is one of the most useless comment Topaz has seen in years.
Real man ko fake man ni.

I year you boss

Hanseel1:
It's only in Nigeria that things like this become a debate.
There's absolutely nothing wrong if you move into your wife's house.
Marriage is all about understanding.

uncivilized Nigerians are already advising the couples to rent out the house while they move to a rented house! who cursed Nigeria?
who's gonna pay the rent if they move into a rented apartment?

is it even sensible for you to move into a rented apartment when you've your own home?

If one could choose where he'd been created on Africa is the last place a sane person will choose..
A useless continent where there are no durable investments in science and technology yet they're debating over a house! later they'll start calling whites racists when they're being mocked.

Smh

woman never hurt you based on say she get money pass you before na him make you dey para there. Just like you said, it's only in Nigeria that such things are even an issue. You are right o. We, Nigerian men would love it if things were different, alas, they are not. Would you rather bury your head in the sand and pretend you are in another country?

MarieSucre:

Hanseel1

See ya people. If I call all the men wey no handle power well, you got intoxicate and carried away and caused millions of death, why famine, wiped out ethnicities even in our very own Nigeria here now, you will come and quote me. Warn your guys. He who lives in a glass house...

Women are lovely and interesting... But saddling them with the responsibility of heading a home when the man is there, is a no no...
Let's not be personal.... But that's just the truth...

henroe2k2:

Women are lovely and interesting... But saddling them with the responsibility of heading a home when the man is there, is a no no...
Let's not be personal.... But that's just the truth...

The comments i responded to is not who heads the home. But saying that a woman cannot head the home because they get intoxicated by power when history tells us men have done that more and in disastrous proportions yet somehow they are automatically assumed to have the best leadership qualities to head anything much less a home.

Emma1Oj:
if its a rented apartment the man should take responsibility of the rent with immediate effect but if the wife built it with money the woman should handover the document of the house to the man.

Wait what what ? Ahahahaha lol laughing so hard

it deosnt mean anything, it only depends on who pays the rent when it expires.