I am married to a wonderful lady. We have two lovely kids and by God's grace we lack nothing. However my wife had to go outside the country to further her studies. She took our last son with her on the trip and I sent my older daughter to my mum because of my busy schedule.

That is where the problem is. I am currently living with a househelp alone in our house and all of a sudden the girl has become very beautiful in my eyes. Not that she was not but it seems I cant resist her now.

I have managed to overcome the temptation up till now but I don't know for how long. As if she has noticed it, she keeps exposing herself in a very indecent ways and I want to send her away till my wife returns.

Will that help? My fear is that the sex 'appetite' is still there and I might take it outside; something which I dread so much.

I am not looking for insults please. I want genuine and clever advise. This is no joke, my future depends on this. How do I overcome this urge?

You are still considering? Please send her away, cheating on your wife with you househelp is a taboo.
Try to control your sexual urges by engaging in other hobbies to keep your mind occupied if this fails then you may have to use your own hands.

chase dat ur house help on a level of 440, try nd blank ur mind while u r doin dat y didnt u try nd visit ur wife if u bouyant enuf 2 do that. Also tell ur wife abt ur urge wit that i blv it will reduce. Goodluck to u because u r a responsible hubby.

Please send her away as soon as you can.I am soooo sure God will give you the grace to do so.But i am not sure if God will give you the grace to resist her.So,its better to do the one you have grace for.For the sake of your happy marriage which i am sure you are guarding jealously,for the sake of your innocent children and of course your own future.It will even be better if you ask her not to come back when you wife comes back because she will only intensify her efforts in seducing you whether your wife is around or not.Please be wise and flee all appearance of the devil/evil.

topgirl:

Please send her away as soon as you can.I am soooo sure God will give you the grace to do so.But i am not sure if God will give you the grace to resist her.So,its better to do the one you have grace for.For the sake of your happy marriage which i am sure you are guarding jealously,for the sake of your innocent children and of course your own future.It will even be better if you ask her not to come back when you wife comes back because she will only intensify her efforts in seducing you whether your wife is around or not.Please be wise and flee all appearance of the devil/evil.

Please take this advice and act now. A word is enough for the wise.

@poster: i repect u alot for that,

just give her some money just like what 190 said, she should come back anytime her madam (ur wife) comes, i bet u ur wife will be happy for u.

Fear and Faith are cousins. What u fear U will do U most likely will do. What U have faith will happen will happen.

Obviously Ur not busy enough. U myt need to go visit Ur wife after sending the house girl back. Those house girls thingys can be very ambitious U know. Their targets are usually the men in the house. She knows what she's doing.

Call Ur wife now and tell her in detail the things U want to do to her once she gets back and the things U would do to her now if U were there. Don't mice words. That U are miles apart doesnt mean U cant find satisfaction with her. U owe it to ur marriage to let her know what U are going thru. Try that. It should help.

Send the house girl packing immediately. Visit your wife to reduce your urge. Agro no bastard thing ooo. or let her come visiting. if you are bouyant enuff.

lovely response so far

sending housemaid away with 'gratuity' is a welcome idea.

but am wondering, could that be a long lasting solution? A man plays well either at home or away. it really dosent count who owns the stadium

how long is your wife staying? A year or more? Get busy!

Welcome to the world of 'father'

Guys I can't thank you enough. Very intelligent and clever ideas there. Though I was scared this will turn into bashing, you guys proved how matured you are. I spoke to my wife and I am going to visit next week.

The house girl will leave when I come back to town. Will arrange with my mum to keep her for me till my wife comes. I told my wife the girl is innocent of all the things going on and that it is my feelings that is causing the problems here.

Again I can't thank you guys well enough. You guys just reminded me I could join her.

Thank you guys, thank you Nairaland you just saved my marriage and my faith.

awwwww how sweet,

Insert Quote
Guys I can't thank you enough. Very intelligent and clever ideas there. Though I was scared this will turn into bashing, you guys proved how matured you are. I spoke to my wife and I am going to visit next week.

The house girl will leave when I come back to town. Will arrange with my mum to keep her for me till my wife comes. I told my wife the girl is innocent of all the things going on and that it is my feelings that is causing the problems here.

Again I can't thank you guys well enough. You guys just reminded me I could join her.

Thank you guys, thank you Nairaland you just saved my marriage and my faith.







GOOD BOY

I'm surprised at some of the responses here, some people are suggesting you should blank your mind from sex! How is that possible? of course send the girl away immediately but you and your wife didnt plan this very well at all. She left the country for studies so in the mean time how do you both cater for your sxual needs? By blanking your minds off it?

Akwasi:

Guys I can't thank you enough. Very intelligent and clever ideas there. Though I was scared this will turn into  bashing, you guys proved how matured you are. I spoke to my wife and I am going to visit next week.

The house girl will leave when I come back to town. Will arrange with my mum to keep her for me till my wife comes. I told my wife the girl is innocent of all the things going on and that it is my feelings that is causing the problems here.

Again I can't thank you guys well enough. You guys just reminded me I could join her.

Thank you guys, thank you Nairaland you just saved my marriage and my faith.

**Grinning**
and i made the most intelligent post which u took and saved UR marriage

UP 190!!

@ poster wak that food now dat its served hot, better dan having to have an external affair outside.

if your family is about to return you can now send her away pronto.

who knows were ur woman is feeding from right now.

LOLLLLL, did you really need Nairaland to tell you do the right thing, this must be jokes section or something.

Like someone said, common sense would have done the trick just fine, sleeping with the housemaid who will only agree cos you pay her salary reeks of bullying and lack of a good thinking process!!

sexdoctor:

@ poster wak that food now dat its served hot, better dan having to have an external affair outside.

if your family is about to return you can now send her away pronto.

who knows were your woman is feeding from right now.

just hold on for the insults about flying ur way!

awasi pls pls and pls,give that gorl money right away and send her back from were she came from. do you want to ruin you marriage? cos i bet you that when once you start tapping that mad of your you will be surprise that even when your wife comes back, your maid will end up needing the whole package and the bubble will burst. she does not have to come back even whem madam is back cos that will niether help the situation.make sure you tell you wife why you had to send her away and try as much as you can to go and be with you wife cos you reall need it.

in any case you wanna even if you wanna cheat on your wife, don't do it with a house-help, yours in particular!!!!!!!!!!! be considerate of the embarrassment your children and wife will suffer , heck your man card will be revoked by, err'one with sense .

@poster, i admire ur courage, u r one in a million,kip it up. May God help u

@ 190

just hold on for the insults about flying your way!

the truth is always bitter 90% of men will do with my opinion

Why don't you send the housegirl packing and replace her with a male

Is your house help's name Ekaete by any chance? if so make sure say u no give am belle

im sorry but do u really think that temptation cannot be actualized between now and the nxt week that u are leaving to go meet ur wife?? You should send the maid to ur mam rite away, dont waste time,

Well. there's two things you can do to help with the situation. First the only way to overcpme temptaion is to deal with it squarely. I mean there's no need to send her packing. Lets assume at you place of work you work with beauiful women, are they going to go packing because of you personel sexual urge?No so be honest to yourself and deal with the situation like a man. And secondly if you choose to send her packing and she return as soon as your wife get back from her trip, don' you think that same voice will still be there? Anyway, i were you i would ask her to stop dressing improperly and let her know her position in the house ( house maid)

@ poster, we are only tempted by what we allow.

[size=14pt]The Bible tells us to FLEE from all appearances of evil. [/size]

You don't face temptation, you run away from it.

Since, you have allowed her to be a temptation to you, you better send her away now not later.

God bless.

Just checking out

larimo:

@ poster, we are only tempted by what we allow.

[size=14pt]The Bible tells us to FLEE from all appearances of evil. [/size]

You don't face temptation, you run away from it.

Since, you have allowed her to be a temptation to you, you better send her away now not later.

God bless.

The final epistle of larimo!![color=#990000][/color]

suedoh2006:

Well. there's two things you can do to help with the situation. First the only way to overcpme temptaion is to deal with it squarely. I mean there's no need to send her packing. Lets assume at you place of work you work with beauiful women, are they going to go packing because of you personel sexual urge?No so be honest to yourself and deal with the situation like a man. And secondly if you choose to send her packing and she return as soon as your wife get back from her trip, don' you think that same voice will still be there? Anyway, i were you i would ask her to stop dressing improperly and let her know her position in the house ( house maid)

Kai! This is more than just indecent dressing. He is living with and attracted to the 'tempter'. Its a thing of the mind. You must cut it off. You don't negotiate with temptation when you are struggling with it. The guy isn't strong enough to handle from what he has written and even the housemaid knows by now being indecent.