So friends, a female friend of mine is in serious need of advice from me and the topic on ground seems somewhat controversial so I decided to share this question in order to make comparisons with my views on the issue.

This female friend of mine once found herself in a situation that would have probably left her feeling some regrets in her visit to one of her best female friends house just 2 years ago.
It happened that she visited her friend during the holidays and both of them were having fun while watching a movie from her friends older brothers laptop. As usual with most Nigerian parents na, they began to call her friend every now and then sending her on one short errand or the other leaving her the visitor in the room all alone. After spending some time watching the movie all alone and not being a movie freak, she dozed off on her friends bed while the movie continued to play. After sleeping for some time, only for her to awake to meet her skirt drawn one sided and her friends older brother kneeling in front of the laptop.
Although the young man claimed to be in need of the laptop and in the room to collect it because she already fell asleep, but the way she continuously switched her eyes from her one sided skirt to the young man already showed that she understood what was going on and this prompted the young man to stylishly apologize for his actions.
As if that wasn't enough, this young man ever since then has continued to trail her movement and even got her number from his sister and calls her from time to time asking for them to engage in a serious relationship which should probably lead to marriage.
This young man is 31 now, an architect with BSc and working with a good company while my friend is 25 and would be done with her HND before the year runs out.
On advising her, I tried to ask her if she loves the guy regardless of his previous action towards her but she continues to say she's confused about the whole thing and don't know what to do. But the fact that she's even in contact with the guy shows that she doesn't completely detest the guy and that is why I want to be careful with my advice to her.

For me I want to be rational with my thinking but some questions continues to pop in my mind

1. Was the guy actually trying to rape her?
2. Was he just trying to have a glimpse of how her Congo looks like?
3. Could excessive love for someone make someone do such a crazy thing?
4. And if he truly loved the lady, why didn't he try to approach her in the right way?
So I appeal to all NL gurus in Romance section to upgrade my knowledge on how I should advise her on this very important issue pls.

But all in all, is it safe to marry someone who once tried to rape you

No insults please...

Attempted murder is not treated as a murder case.

Bluezy13:
Attempted murder is not treated as a murder case.

In other news, it is safe for her to engage in the r/ship right?

respect80:


In other news, it is safe for her to engage in the r/ship right?

Yea...


If she loves the guy.
The guy loves her already.

My verdict: whether the guy attempted to rape her previously is not the issue at stake. if i understood your write-up, you said that the boy apologised for his actions, so the girl in question needs to forgive him wholeheartedly. i believe that love conquers all things and i strongly believe that the guy genuinely loves her. tell her to give the guy a chance in her life, i believe she will not regret it.

Kingosytex:
My verdict: whether the guy attempted to rape her previously is not the issue at stake. if i understood your write-up, you said that the boy apologised for his actions, so the girl in question needs to forgive him wholeheartedly. i believe that love conquers all things and i strongly believe that the guy genuinely loves her. tell her to give the guy a chance in her life, i believe she will not regret it.

Noted bro.
That's the reason why I tried to ask her if she love the guy in spite of his actions.
Truly love conquers all

since is not like they will get married tomorrow, if she is single she can give is a trier and see the kind of person the guy is and she can even found out what cause is previous action
she can give it a trier

neither yes or no

confused at 25?

confused at 25? it's either she wants to marry him or she doesn't, choose one and deal with your issue. we've all got more serious issues bothering us.

Op, it is no big deal... tell her to date the guy joor.. I don't think the guy wanted to rape her. He was just infatuated. He was probably much younger then , and now that he is mature, what is your friend waiting for.


If there is another reason for her not to date him, fine....But if it is because of this, then she should not worry, tell her I said so

jonath0012:
Op, it is no big deal... tell her to date the guy joor.. I don't think the guy wanted to rape her. He was just infatuated. He was probably much younger then , and now that he is mature, what is your friend waiting for.


If there is another reason for her not to date him, fine....But if it is because of this, then she should not worry, tell her I said so

You sound like a boss bro.
I thought my mind was too weak because of the rate I easily forgive but some people's reactions has made me realize it's the right thing to do.
Thanks for your position on this

elyna:
confused at 25? it's either she wants to marry him or she doesn't, choose one and deal with your issue. we've all got more serious issues bothering us.

I wish she could understand this.
She's a good friend and I always tried to let her know that the guys previous action was not a strong thing to hold on to. But u know women always have their way of dragging you to talk about an issue no matter how much you shy away from it.

Auladimeji1:
The Op also love the lady but he's trying to see maybe he could also get his chances

U are a bad child. Lol
Well, that's not the case cos I have a relationship which she herself is truly aware of

zyzxx:
since is not like they will get married tomorrow, if she is single she can give is a trier and see the kind of person the guy is and she can even found out what cause is previous action
she can give it a trier

neither yes or no

Not a bad idea

Auladimeji1:
What's Congo?

A country where men love to visit... Lol