JONNYSPUTE:
.If I'm to be in her shoes,I would have simply told my gf that i went out with a friend,simple. If she had told the guy she is out with a friend which is also a lie,the guy wouldn't have been so paranoid on seeing her there,she can simply cover it up,after all a friend can be either male or female. But for her to say she was at home bored and missing him is a no no for any body. Okey,just imagine your bf told you he travelled and mistakingly you saw him coming out from a joint with another lady,how will you feel? even if the lady is his sister but for the fact he lied will make you to stop trusting him no matter the story he tells you after.

Yea right... like we don't know the next question would have been : which of your friends? Let me talk to her....blah blah blah.

Of course I would feel bad, But we would have fought, settled ,made love or destroyed love and not sulk or give childish, meaningless silent treatment.

MariaLavina:
Really? Are Nigerian men now so secure to allow their partners hang out with opposite sex? huh may be thank God for civilization there is a little difference in their perspectives about this but majority are still archaic. Technically you fall in the latter.. Thing is Not all men can take their women hanging out with guys. Reason why some are discreet about it.

You know what? He can't be my bro because my brother though young but mentally mature will do better than to vanish from the scene like some heartbroken cinderalla, lock up and sulk like some toddler denied lollipop. He knows some things aren't what they seem to be. 'What is there may not be, what isn't there may be'. I wonder what manner of men people breed these days!

That said, no body is telling him to put a ring on her finger. No, ain't saying that but then he should hear her out, talk to her and let her know her fate. BTW you wrote caught red handed, Where they kissing, romancing, holding hands or having sex in the isi iwu joint?

Lol @your last sentence. A pidgin English proverb says that "na from clap, dance dey start". A true player can quite easily sweet talk a gal that lies to her bf & get her to "za other room" from an Isi ewu joint. (Trust me, I've seen worse).

Wisdom demands that if her bf is the insecure type then she must restrict all hangouts to just ladies except he is in the know and/or present too.

MariaLavina:
Yea right... like we don't know the next question would have been : which of your friends? Let me talk to her....blah blah blah.

Of course I would feel bad, But we would have fought, settled ,made love or destroyed love and not sulk or give childish, meaningless silent treatment.

.. This is where trust comes in. See,at any given time in your relationship you told your partner that you are out with a friend and he or she demanded to talk with the person,then there is no trust.My dear,trust is a very valuable recipe for any relationship or marriage. Forgiving one is not the samething as forgetting ones deed.

2kurupt:


Lol @your last sentence. A pidgin English proverb says that "na from clap, dance dey start". A true player can quite easily sweet talk a gal that lies to her bf & get her to "za other room" from an Isi ewu joint.

Wisdom demands that if her bf is the insecure type then she must restrict all hangouts to just ladies except he is in the know and/or present too.

It wasn't red handed sha... The way you guys assume and conclude on here is amazing

She shouldn't have lied.

JONNYSPUTE:
.. This is where trust comes in. See,at any given time in your relationship you told your partner that you are out with a friend and he or she demanded to talk with the person,then there is no trust.My dear,trust is a very valuable recipe for any relationship or marriage. Forgiving one is not the samething as forgetting ones deed.

At least we are getting somewhere...

The said guy may be having issues in the trust department, we all don't know who he is, what he's like so we shouldn't judge.

MariaLavina:
It wasn't red handed sha... The way you guys assume and conclude on here is amazing

She shouldn't have lied.

I never said she was caught red handed but for the guy to have witnessed this while about to propose, am sure you know it must have really hurt him.

Oh well, complete silent treatment is kinda childish sha but then who knows? This is probably not a first time of such happening. ( i.e. being lied to, almost compromising situations etc)

MariaLavina:
At least we are getting somewhere...

The said guy may be having issues in the trust department, we all don't know who he is, what he's like so we shouldn't judge.

... Okey I agree and since you I and know that trust is earn not automatic, what if the said girl has a questionable character that has made the said guy finding it difficult to trust her?.

LaBozz:
My friend was about to propose to his girlfriend but now he is left confused as to whether he should go ahead or just forget about it.
The reason for this is because he had been away from town on a business trip. Him and his girlfriend has constantly been in touch while he was away so everything seemed okay. So while he was about returning, he called me and told me about his plan to propose to his girlfriend and I supported him so he said he wanted to surprise her so he wasn't going to tell her he is coming back the next day.

When he arrived I picked him from the airport, and right inside the car he called his girlfriend asked were she was and she said she was at home, bored and so so missing the guy. Just after ending the call we decided to branch our favorite Isi Ewu joint to cool off a little and there was the unbelievable shocker we got.
His girlfriend was there in a table for two with another guy. It was very obvious they had been there for quite a while so that means she answered his call right at that joint and was lying she was bored at home.

As a matured guy that didn't want to cause a scene, we just decided to forget about the isi ewu and we bounced out. She was so shocked that she ran after us but we just entered the car and zoomed off leaving her to continue her date.

She has been calling and sending messages but my guy ain't responding and he just locked up because he is really hurt.

Now he is thinking of forgetting about the whole proposal thing for now and he is not sure yet if after meeting her to hear her stories, anything could change.

Why are some girls this wicked, especially to good guys that decide not to cheat.

My FRIEND please wake up.
She is not wicked.
When there is an unhealthy space anywhere, there are chances things could inhabit it.
DISTANT relationships are not easy to put up with.
By the way she’s not his WIFE and has no legal backing or whatsoever.
What if your Guy had been seeing other ladies over there all this while...
No one recognizes Dating, Girlfriend or Boyfriend.
She has to entertain other serious minded Guys as well.
It’s only a FOOLISH LADY that will stay put and act like a SHEEP waiting for someone she has not been formally and legally tied to her, even when other viable suitors are flocking her sides.

Finally, what if your Guy had proposed to another lady and settled down with her while overseas...??
What would you have done...??

Xaos:


Catch am dey do wetin?

Na you catch her abi you dey work for EFCC?

She might be out with a family friend, brother or cousin.
It pays to know what is going on before you make a decision. Bro, learn to stop jumping into conclusions.

That you would have to lie that you are home

op dont be supprise, that girl must have been riding dirty on some random carousel, when your freind was not in town.

EVILFOREST:

My FRIEND please wake up.
She is not wicked.
When there is an unhealthy space anywhere, there are chances things could inhabit it.
DISTANT relationships are not easy to put up with.
By the way she’s not his WIFE and has no legal backing or whatsoever.
What if your Guy had been seeing other ladies over there all this while...
No one recognizes Dating, Girlfriend or Boyfriend.
She has to entertain other serious minded Guys as well.
It’s only a FOOLISH LADY that will stay put and act like a SHEEP waiting for someone she has not been formally and legally tied to her, even when other viable suitors are flocking her sides.

Finally, what if your Guy had proposed to another lady and settled down with her while overseas...??
What would you have done...??

.. You just implied that our ladies should continue flirting right?

Xaos:


Catch am dey do wetin?

Na you catch her abi you dey work for EFCC?

She might be out with a family friend, brother or cousin.
It pays to know what is going on before you make a decision. Bro, learn to stop jumping into conclusions.

I wonder o


She was seated chit chatting with a guy. Not like he saw them kissing or touching romantically. They both jumped into conclusion. Shes cheating.

So his babe cannot hang out in restaurant with any human called MALE? in peace again.

Your guy is not matured at all! And he wants to get married? He's not serious.

What he would have done is this : walk to her table, greet both of them and tell her to her face with sweet smile that shebi she said she's at home, how come she's here having a blast! Then she will explain herself and make introductions between her bf and the guy she's with.

There and then, he's gotten the truth of what's going on.

No need for all this unnecessary games and drama

Anyways he is still a kid. He's not mature in relationship.

victorian:










I wonder o


She was seated chit chatting with a guy. Not like he saw them kissing or touching romantically. They both jumped into conclusion. Shes cheating.

So his babe cannot hang out in restaurant with any human called MALE? in peace again.

Your guy is not matured at all! And he wants to get married? He's not serious.

What he would have done is this : walk to her table, greet both of them and tell her to her face with sweet smile that shebi she said she's at home, how come she's here having a blast! Then she will explain herself and make introductions between her bf and the guy she's with.

There and then, he's gotten the truth of what's going on.

No need for all this unnecessary games and drama

Anyways he is still a kid. He's not mature in relationship.

.. Since she is innocent,why didn't she tell his bf where she was?

JONNYSPUTE:
.. Since she is innocent,why didn't she tell his bf where she was?

Maybe they just got there, not too long ago. She may not have lied. Or she could have forgotten she had a lunch date with a friend or cousin or colleague. Anything is possible at that point, as long as he didn't see them in a romantic position.

Don't you think it will be easy and straight forward to simply walk up to her and the guy, then ask questions there and then ,calmly. Her facial expression, and how she explains herself, also how she introduces the guy seating next to her and introduce him to the guy next to her, will reveal alot and if she's cheating on him or not.
I don't like concluding on things by just looking at scenarios.

There and there, explanations and questions will be asked and answered than just walking away and assuming.


The issue is this: can't she eat in a restaurant with a guy in peace?

victorian:









Maybe they just got there, not too long ago. She may not have lied. Or she could have forgotten she had a lunch date with a friend or cousin or colleague. Anything is possible at that point, as long as he didn't see them in a romantic position.

Don't you think it will be easy and straight forward to simply walk up to her and the guy, then ask questions there and then ,calmly. Her facial expression, and how she explains herself, also how she introduces the guy seating next to her and introduce him to the guy next to her, will reveal alot and if she's cheating on him or not.
I don't like concluding on things by just looking at scenarios.

There and there, explanations and questions will be asked and answered than just walking away and assuming.


The issue is this: can't she eat in a restaurant with a guy in peace?

.. Please stop being overtly emotional and sentimental here. Nobody said she can't eat in a restaurant with a guy,the problem here is lying about her location.like I asked earlier, if your bf told you he traveled and you behold him with another girl in a restaurant, will you not be mad at him?.If she can't tell his guy the truth,how can the guy trust her?.

LaBozz:
My friend was about to propose to his girlfriend but now he is left confused as to whether he should go ahead or just forget about it.
The reason for this is because he had been away from town on a business trip. Him and his girlfriend has constantly been in touch while he was away so everything seemed okay. So while he was about returning, he called me and told me about his plan to propose to his girlfriend and I supported him so he said he wanted to surprise her so he wasn't going to tell her he is coming back the next day.

When he arrived I picked him from the airport, and right inside the car he called his girlfriend asked were she was and she said she was at home, bored and so so missing the guy. Just after ending the call we decided to branch our favorite Isi Ewu joint to cool off a little and there was the unbelievable shocker we got.
His girlfriend was there in a table for two with another guy. It was very obvious they had been there for quite a while so that means she answered his call right at that joint and was lying she was bored at home.

As a matured guy that didn't want to cause a scene, we just decided to forget about the isi ewu and we bounced out. She was so shocked that she ran after us but we just entered the car and zoomed off leaving her to continue her date.

She has been calling and sending messages but my guy ain't responding and he just locked up because he is really hurt.

Now he is thinking of forgetting about the whole proposal thing for now and he is not sure yet if after meeting her to hear her stories, anything could change.

Why are some girls this wicked, especially to good guys that decide not to cheat.

you jumped to conclusion

To argue with a lady is useless. Only few men can win a war of words with members of opposite gender. All these ones arguing with the ladies commenting on the thread are not men. They are boys. A real man does not complain. He does not argue aimlessly.

Op, at one time...i would do what you just did. I'd offer her the silence treatment. Trust me when I say that it unsettles her, especially if she's really into you.

Better still, I'd just mirror her actions. Hang out with other girls and lie about it. If she finds out, tell more lies. Keep lying till she gets tired of the lies. She would ask you if you're trying to get back at her for what she did. Deny your vindictiveness....But keep hanging out with other girls...and keep lying. You'd surely drive her to the thin line separating sanity and insanity. Whether you'd choose to forgive her or keep making her mad- the ball is in your court.

In this life, only babies and weaklings are allowed to complain. Otherwise, anything wey person do you, do back seven-fold. First to do no dey pain

JONNYSPUTE:
.. Please stop being overtly emotional and sentimental here. Nobody said she can't eat in a restaurant with a guy,the problem here is lying about her location.like I asked earlier, if your bf told you he traveled and you behold him with another girl in a restaurant, will you not be mad at him?.If she can't tell his guy the truth,how can the guy trust her?.

If I meet my bf in a restaurant when he said he's at home waiting for me. Yes I will be surprised, I will smile to myself and walk towards his table with glittering angry eyes. if there is an extra seat, I will seat down and smile at both of them, then back to him and say : honey, I was on my way to your house, like u said on phone, few minutes ago, that you were at home waiting for me and missing me but how come u are here with a lady?
And who is she?

His answer there and then will decide if he's lying, if he's cheating on me and if he's simply a waste of time and space. There and then, my decision will be made after he has answered my questions. I don't leave things hanging and presume just by what I see.

I don't procrastinate. I don't run away hurriedly. I face things squarely immediately . So there will be no perhaps. Your guy would have simply gotten his answer there and then, than walking hurriedly away and zooming off. Cmon? That's childish.

You are only trying to justify the girls action. Everybody is not the same. Some people hate lies and once they can't trust another person due to lies,they leave..The girl is a lier and can't be trusted. Period. Happy Sunday.bye.@Victorian.

Jeferious:
To argue with a lady is useless. Only few men can win a war of words with members of opposite gender. All these ones arguing with the ladies commenting on the thread are not men. They are boys. A real man does not complain. He does not argue aimlessly.

Op, at one time...i would do what you just did. I'd offer her the silence treatment. Trust me when I say that it unsettles her, especially if she's really into you.

Better still, I'd just mirror her actions. Hang out with other girls and lie about it. If she finds out, tell more lies. Keep lying till she gets tired of the lies. She would ask you if you're trying to get back at her for what she did. Deny your vindictiveness....But keep hanging out with other girls...and keep lying. You'd surely drive her to the thin line separating sanity and insanity. Whether you'd choose to forgive her or keep making her mad- the ball is in your court.

In this life, only babies and weaklings are allowed to complain. Otherwise, anything wey person do you, do back seven-fold. First to do no dey pain

If I were the one ehn? With this your behavior of hanging out with different girls? Only you go taya. I will simply back off from you, after seeing with series of girls and u are giving me lame excuses or lies.
E go shock you

I don't have the patience for mind games. At this level I am, no man am with, can drive me nuts with his games. I will simply take a walk.

victorian:










If I were the one ehn? With this your behavior of hanging out with different girls? Only you go taya. I will simply back off from you, after seeing with series of girls and u are giving me lame excuses or lies.
E go shock you

I don't have the patience for mind games. At this level I am, no man am with, can drive me nuts with his games. I will simply take a walk.

But you want the op to understand that it's not a big deal hanging out with another guy and lying to him? Why are you this afraid to take a dose of your own medicine? See hypocrisy.

Meanwhile, I've backed off already when I saw you hanging out with another guy. Every other thing is just a supporting statement to that effect. So last last, nobody lost.... except the person who'd try to pull the "men are scum" stunt by ranting about how she gave her body and her all to a guy who penetrated every hole on her body and left her in the lurch after he had used her to his satisfaction.

JONNYSPUTE:
You are only trying to justify the girls action. Everybody is not the same. Some people hate lies and once they can't trust another person due to lies,they leave..The girl is a lier and can't be trusted. Period. Happy Sunday.bye.@Victorian.

No dey mind that one. When you see people who run their mouths/thumbs anyhow on social media just to impress, you'd know. No girl with a boyfriend that she loves spending time with would spend so much time on Nairaland. She always leaves a trail on 70% of threads of NL everyday. Now NL is not the only social media forum out there, and I assume she's also active on Facebook, WhatsApp, Tinder and other social networks. Put all that together and we have a social-media girl/keyboard heavyweight.

So my brother, just waka pass when you see some certain things. The kind girl fit never get boyfriend sef, let alone irritating him by hanging out with another dude and lying about it.

Jeferious:
No dey mind that one. When you see people who run their mouths/thumbs anyhow on social media just to impress, you'd know. No girl with a boyfriend that she loves spending time with would spend so much time on Nairaland. She always leaves a trail on 70% of threads of NL everyday. Now NL is not the only social media forum out there, and I assume she's also active on Facebook, WhatsApp, Tinder and other social networks. Put all that together and we have a social-media girl/keyboard heavyweight.

So my brother, just waka pass when you see some certain things. The kind girl fit never get boyfriend sef, let alone irritating him by hanging out with another dude and lying about it.

.. Thanks bro.

victorian:









If I meet my bf in a restaurant when he said he's at home waiting for me. Yes I will be surprised, I will smile to myself and walk towards his table with glittering angry eyes. if there is an extra seat, I will seat down and smile at both of them, then back to him and say : honey, I was on my way to your house, like u said on phone, few minutes ago, that you were at home waiting for me and missing me but how come u are here with a lady?
And who is she?

His answer there and then will decide if he's lying, if he's cheating on me and if he's simply a waste of time and space. There and then, my decision will be made after he has answered my questions. I don't leave things hanging and presume just by what I see.

I don't procrastinate. I don't run away hurriedly. I face things squarely immediately . So there will be no perhaps. Your guy would have simply gotten his answer there and then, than walking hurriedly away and zooming off. Cmon? That's childish.

Huh?. Easier said than done....Abegi, make we hear word