Guys, I need your opinion. You were somewhere with your boyfriends and girlfriends, so your best friend told you to ask her your girl to go cover herself as she's exposing too much, you approached her in the best possible way, but this girl wouldn't do shitt, 3 different times you told her to use other clothes to cover her exposed breasts while she was bending up and down all the time but she wouldn't have any of it. I mean this girl you planned marrying.

What are you going to do? She doesn't take your word seriously until you start threatening to leave the relationship if she continues. I am so tired of her attitude despite loving her in the best possible way.
Please what else should I do. Do you think she will listen to me after marriage? Will she be able to cover herself when children will be around? this is the lady that undressed when strangers were around in the same room, not just females but guys also.


What is she thinking? that day I was so embarrassed.


Will by asking her to burn the clothes in your presence solved it, or just break up with her, this is not her first time.


Again, this is a lady in her 30's


I am just confused and curious about what could be the problem.


I am sorry for the long epistle.


We are already having 2 years relationship with no problem except she doesn't listen to me until I start threatening with a breakup, this has made my words less value.

Please help

The best advice is self advice. Undressing in the room before your visitors means you are managing one room, you will soon get a better apartment.

emmie14:
The best advice is self advice. Undressing in the room before your visitors means you are managing one room, you will soon get a better apartment.

She is a student and she lives in self-contain, so she could have actually changed in the toilet or kitchen.

BrAkingNews:


She is a student and she lives in self-contain, so she could have actually changed in the toilet or kitchen.

In her 30's a student yet can't cover herself.

The lady is under intense pressure from family to get married but you don't seem to be serious with her towards marriage.


She is simply sampling herself to people including your friends so that a serious person can find her attractive and perhaps marry her....


Go and marry her bro..if you truely love her.

If she doesn't listen to you now then don't expect her to listen when she's MRS. Never go into marraige hoping a person will change. That's a recipe for touching stories.

The say "Regard for her body" is rich coming from a guy who's possibly fornicating with his girlfriend.

Mr man. If you truly have regards for her body, you won't be sleeping with her without paying for her bride price.

Quit complaining and come out plain.

Tell us you are insecure and scared to loose her to other men because of her mode of dressing.

thunderfirebuha:
The lady is under intense pressure from family to get married but you don't seem to be serious with her towards marriage.


She is simply sampling herself to people including your friends so that a serious person can find her attractive and perhaps marry her....


Go and marry her bro..if you truely love her.

The point is, will she be adherent to him after marriage.

We've many ladies below her age that exude same habit we they change also?

Op the handwriting is already written on the wall I fully know you're mature enough to him take decision..though you arrived late after two years of the relationship.

A woman that can't listen to his man advice, may greet you with worst regret if eventually tie a nuptial knot with her.

Well, I was once in your shoes so I get how you feel. In my own case, I knew I couldn't change her, it's part of her person - in her own words she isn't the "plenty plenty clothes" type so the best I could was to manage the situation, not fight it.

Most times I be firm on her like nah, please don't go outside like that. Other times I be more half suggestive half persuasive like Babe, this your top I don't like it, why not try the other one; Or pass your message across jokingly like; walking around in that nightie, my guy's eyes were just on you. Don't be showing people my properties babe ... stuffs like that.
Initially she gives me the puppy look, then tries her best to follow suit. Still yet, neighbors/visitors alike always got an eye full so with time mehn I just got used to it. Other times too with visitors around, I just give her the eyes. She was far from being the promiscuous type, I think she was just more comfortable in her skin on them skimpy wears.

My point is; in dealing with women, sometimes you need a laid back approach. Yes, as men we are territorial by nature and the love gets us acting all possessive but learn to let some things go. Learn to give up control atimes, that in itself is power my brother.

IamD18:
The say "Regard for her body" is rich coming from a guy who's possibly fornicating with his girlfriend.

Mr man. If you truly have regards for her body, you won't be sleeping with her without paying for her bride price.

Quit complaining and come out plain.

Tell us you are insecure and scared to loose her to other men because of her mode of dressing.

Didn't you read where he said she undressed before his friends? What kind of a lady in her 30s does that? Op, she doesn't value her body nor have an atom of respect for you. I won't say you should leave her, but do what's best for you in this situation.

emmie14:

In her 30's a student yet can't cover herself.

... I'll always say it that age has little or no thing to do with maturity...Some of these aunties that you expect to be mature in reasoning are just so immature...

Op, tell her straight up that you can't put up with her attitude anymore and she has to start covering up.. Just sit her down and tell her all that is in your heart.. watch her for weeks, if she doesn't change then excuse yourself from the relationship....

CorGier:
Well, I was once in your shoes so I get how you feel. In my own case, I knew I couldn't change her, it's part of her person - in her own words she isn't the "plenty plenty clothes" type so the best I could was to manage the situation, not fight it.

Most times I be firm on her like nah, please don't go outside like that. Other times I be more half suggestive half persuasive like Babe, this your top I don't like it, why not try the other one; Or pass your message across jokingly like; walking around in that nightie, my guy's eyes were just on you. Don't be showing people my properties babe ... stuffs like that.
Initially she gives me the puppy look, then tries her best to follow suit. Still yet, neighbors/visitors alike always got an eye full so with time mehn I just got used to it. Other times too with visitors around, I just give her the eyes. She was far from being the promiscuous type, I think she was just more comfortable in her skin on them skimpy wears.

My point is; in dealing with women, sometimes you need a laid back approach. Yes, as men we are territorial by nature and the love gets us acting all possessive but learn to let some things go. Learn to give up control atimes, that in itself is power my brother.

Did that your gf ever undréss before your visitors?

I think we're dealing with two different situations. Once had a neighbour in her 30s too who was living with her cousin; a married guy in his 30s too. When this lady comes visiting; she practically stays naked all day. Her cousin's wife complained 'till she got tired of it. Whether the husband and wife were around or not; she doesn't care, but when they have guests: she would dress up. Common sense should tell one when or when not to undréss. It's not about being territorial, it's normal he feels that way.

GrabHisBalls:
Did that your gf ever undréss before your visitors?

I think we're dealing with two different situations. Once had a neighbour in her 30s too who was living with her cousin; a married guy in his 30s too. When this lady comes visiting; she practically stays naked all day. Her cousin's wife complained 'till she got tired of it. Whether the husband and wife were around or not; she doesn't care, but when they have guests: she would dress up. Common sense should tell one when or when not to undréss. It's not about being territorial, it's normal he feels that way.

Well, at least the OP (and by extension, the cousin's wife) found out the hard way that merely yapping on and on about some things you might not like doesn't necessarily lead to the desired result.

Some people don't really see these things as a big deal, so it's not an issue of common sense per se. For example, some people for some reason prefer using the loo with the door ajar, try talking them out of it one time too many, even as a sibling, and they pick offence or even just turn a deaf ear. It's become a habit for them you see so expecting them to stop abruptly just cos you said so is a tad unfair. Hence, why I felt he needs to manage the situation better. Manner of approach matters, especially for SOs.

If you can't take it then leave her. How are you going to tell a 30+ year old how to dress? Nonsense

CorGier:


Well, at least the OP (and by extension, the cousin's wife) has found out the hard way that merely yapping on and on about some things doesn't necessarily lead to the required result.

Some people don't really see these things as a big deal, so it's not an issue of common sense per se. Some people prefer using the loo with the door ajar, try talking them out of it one time too many, even as a partner and they pick offence or just turn a deaf ear. It's become a habit for them so expecting them to stop just cos you say so is a bit unfair. Hence, why I felt he needs to manage the situation better. Manner of approach matters, you see.

Using the loo with the door ajar is a common practice with some people and those who complain do so 'cause of the stench, not by merely leaving the door open.

I get your point, and not complaining would mean he's comfortable with her attitude, whereas, he isn't.

You already know this is not going to work. It’s very simple a relationship does not get better once you get married. The whole point of dating is to establish a firm foundation now after two years you find yourself making threats in order to make a point across what’s wrong with that picture? Now if someone has no boundaries and your friends are telling you what is obvious but you opt to take the Jesus approach of sacrifice in the face of adversity then you deserve what you get.

This is not a relationship. It’s a situation as one of you lacks a certain level of maturity and emotional intelligence to call it stable. Why are you setting yourself up for failure like this? You like being disappointed? Is it some sort of hobby?

GrabHisBalls:
Did that your gf ever undréss before your visitors?

I think we're dealing with two different situations. Once had a neighbour in her 30s too who was living with her cousin; a married guy in his 30s too. When this lady comes visiting; she practically stays naked all day. Her cousin's wife complained 'till she got tired of it. Whether the husband and wife were around or not; she doesn't care, but when they have guests: she would dress up. Common sense should tell one when or when not to undréss. It's not about being territorial, it's normal he feels that way.

She would have visited once and there would have been no repeat episodes if I was that wife. What manner of nonsense is that?

that's ur luck. some of them who are teachers go to class to teach boys n girls in breast baring outfits or cleavage showing skirts and don't feel any qualms. they enjoy it ,so u too shd just take it like that, no body will rape her for u

I think that she is not fully matured as a woman

Even if she is 30yrs, age is not maturity

If she can't obey simple instructions to cover up herself, is it a bigger instruction that she will obey?

Just give her a break, if she ask you why ?
just tell her you need a break

Take that time to reflect on the relationship