my mum is against me and been giving me attitude, I and her hasn't been in this kinda disagreement b4, and am getting worried and tryna compromise...
I just finished university, will serve next year and haven't gotten my result yet... my convocation is this month...
I did a petty work, just to keep myself busy for a month, took all the insults from my boss, all the sexual harassment from clients and all the sleeping late and waking up early just For 15k salary, I quitted de job... I told myself afterwards... Neva again will I stoop this low, am worth more... meanwhile I did that just to proudly say that "I was working" plus I wanted to be independent... and its my first work experience. so na, momsy was like, let's all av a feel of ur first salary na, I agreed wholeheartedly by sponsoring her and my sis hair making and buying stuffs for family use in our house... money remaining 10k, I have personal needs as a girl, plus I wanted to save too, so that was my intention for de rest of de money...
2 days later, my mum cunningly took my ATM and spent de 10k in there, I didn't know... till she told me moments later that she just used my money to do business that will benefit us as a family...
I got angry like wtf, coz coupled with the fact that she did that without my permission, that ain't right... instead she got angry too, she said all manner of things to me, that upon all the money she spent for my education, that i was stingy and reminded me that she pays the bills in de house and stuffs... I Neva said anything offensive that could av made her say many things that were uncalled for, @ that point I was silent, she counted de money from nowhere and gave to me, I collected it and went away. mind you, am from an average family so that money is nothing to my parents.
she has been giving me serious attitude since then and I consulted my uncle to talk to her, but instead he said I should go and apologise and give her back the money, I'll apologise, but I don't think I'll give de money... plss what is wrong with African parents.

Lolll

You shouldnt have taken the money, that was just a trap

Just give her back the money and keep your atm card well next time. I wonder how she got to know your pin.

Na Black Mentality.
You don't need to be worry. Let go of it.
With time you gonna be over the anger feeding your mind. Mind you next time correct the lapses that gave room to this.
Children deserves some respect even from parent.

Mikkyjay17:
Na Black Mentality.

You don't need to be worry. Let go of it.

With time you gonna be over the anger feeding your mind.
Mind you next time correct the lapses that gave room to this.

Children deserves some respect even from parent.

God bless you bro, parents do some annoying things and expect their children to take it without complain. If you complain they'll quote ephesians for you but always forget in same ephesians it says "Parents do not provoke your children". In all it all comes down to showing I'm a lord and can't be corrected
-Parents belief

Africanz n dia backward mentality,no sensible parent should ever remind dia child bout how dey took care of em,cos nobody forced u to birth em,u were just doing what yuh supposed to do,n shouldn't ask for a honorary award 4doing yuh job,go n talk to her,buh don't give her sh!t,if what u said is how it happened den like i said before don't give her sh!t...

African parents and their wahala.

She fed and sponsored you in school and so what? its her right to train you,you didn't force her to bring you into the world.

Deed has been done. Make amends with her and keep your debit card safe.

you shouldn't have collected the money back but what your mum did was wrong sha. give her the money and apologize. she is still your mum no matter what. just be prepared that when u have enough money, them go task you tire

queenice7:
my mum is against me and been giving me attitude, I and her hasn't been in this kinda disagreement b4, and am getting worried and tryna compromise...
I just finished university, will serve next year and haven't gotten my result yet... my convocation is this month...
I did a petty work, just to keep myself busy for a month, took all the insults from my boss, all the sexual harassment from clients and all the sleeping late and waking up early just For 15k salary, I quitted de job... I told myself afterwards... Neva again will I stoop this low, am worth more... meanwhile I did that just to proudly say that "I was working" plus I wanted to be independent... and its my first work experience. so na, momsy was like, let's all av a feel of ur first salary na, I agreed wholeheartedly by sponsoring her and my sis hair making and buying stuffs for family use in our house... money remaining 10k, I have personal needs as a girl, plus I wanted to save too, so that was my intention for de rest of de money...
2 days later, my mum cunningly took my ATM and spent de 10k in there, I didn't know... till she told me moments later that she just used my money to do business that will benefit us as a family...
I got angry like wtf, coz coupled with the fact that she did that without my permission, that ain't right... instead she got angry too, she said all manner of things to me, that upon all the money she spent for my education, that i was stingy and reminded me that she pays the bills in de house and stuffs... I Neva said anything offensive that could av made her say many things that were uncalled for, @ that point I was silent, she counted de money from nowhere and gave to me, I collected it and went away. mind you, am from an average family so that money is nothing to my parents.
she has been giving me serious attitude since then and I consulted my uncle to talk to her, but instead he said I should go and apologise and give her back the money, I'll apologise, but I don't think I'll give de money... plss what is wrong with African parents.

You better give her back the money .

You asking her to apologize?

For what exactly?

She did no wrong as far as I'm concerned and based on what she said...

Her mum was the one who stole her money and should be the one to apologize...

Africans and their entitlement attitude is a big problem!

You people asking her to apologize?

For what exactly?

She did no wrong as far as I'm concerned and based on what she said...

Her mum was the one who stole her money and should be the one to apologize...

Africans and their entitlement attitude is a big problem!

why did you collect the money ?

vingeophysicist:
You better give her back the money .

Why

vingeophysicist:
You better give her back the money .

Why??

uhmmmmmm
dhat is africa morher mentalitu. dey beleive once u start working ur salary belong to dem. and once u did not complain dhat how it eill continie. dont return d money, change ur ATM CARD password, if u get home eat d food dhat she cook. if she ask u for money tell her u donr have. donr even let her know ur salary range again. when dey pay u . just change ur movement sha.

That mum no get shame. Imagine stealing your daughters money and blackmailing her after. She for no send am go school na. She is a failure if she doesn't perform her duty. It is a child's right to be taken care of by the parents.

she is prolly doing that cos you are a girl, she may not try it with your brother


my mom can never try that with me, in our house, we don't let family affect money, if she buys something from me, she must pay or vice versa

your mom is a stingy and short sighted woman, she thinks that 10k should be wasted because it is small

na your father I just dey pity, that man go don see life


you shouldn't have told your uncle though, things like this should stay in immediate family, your uncle is an outsider

whenever my mom tells me that she carried me in her belly for 9 months and breastfed me, I tell her that she was the one that wanted me, I didn't force myself on her


don't apologise to your mom girl, your money is yours, it is wrong on all levels, it is thievery and you should warn her against things like this


african parents have a mentality that their children's first earnings should be given to them, what a backward thinking

MarianaTrench:
You people asking her to apologize?

For what exactly?

She did no wrong as far as I'm concerned and based on what she said...

Her mum was the one who stole her money and should be the one to apologize...

Africans and their entitlement attitude is a big problem!

A simple show of humility could settle it once and for all. You don't always need to be wrong to apologise to people. For the sake of sustaining a good relationship, selflessness should always lead the way. She's her mother, she needs to apologise to her.

queenice7:
my mum is against me and been giving me attitude, I and her hasn't been in this kinda disagreement b4, and am getting worried and tryna compromise...
I just finished university, will serve next year and haven't gotten my result yet... my convocation is this month...
I did a petty work, just to keep myself busy for a month, took all the insults from my boss, all the sexual harassment from clients and all the sleeping late and waking up early just For 15k salary, I quitted de job... I told myself afterwards... Neva again will I stoop this low, am worth more... meanwhile I did that just to proudly say that "I was working" plus I wanted to be independent... and its my first work experience. so na, momsy was like, let's all av a feel of ur first salary na, I agreed wholeheartedly by sponsoring her and my sis hair making and buying stuffs for family use in our house... money remaining 10k, I have personal needs as a girl, plus I wanted to save too, so that was my intention for de rest of de money...
2 days later, my mum cunningly took my ATM and spent de 10k in there, I didn't know... till she told me moments later that she just used my money to do business that will benefit us as a family...
I got angry like wtf, coz coupled with the fact that she did that without my permission, that ain't right... instead she got angry too, she said all manner of things to me, that upon all the money she spent for my education, that i was stingy and reminded me that she pays the bills in de house and stuffs... I Neva said anything offensive that could av made her say many things that were uncalled for, @ that point I was silent, she counted de money from nowhere and gave to me, I collected it and went away. mind you, am from an average family so that money is nothing to my parents.
she has been giving me serious attitude since then and I consulted my uncle to talk to her, but instead he said I should go and apologise and give her back the money, I'll apologise, but I don't think I'll give de money... plss what is wrong with African parents.

Let me tell u the truth u deserve to know, u see all this comments and post about African parents this or that is total gibberish, i don't know how you were raised but for me the only thing my mom can't have of me is my soul. I trained my self half way through the uni (3rd to 5th grade) graduated and even as am typing this there is nothing my mom can't get from me as long as its mine, moro am rushing to pay off a debt (400k) she incured and has been trying to settle without my notice
if i were in your shoes i will even be happy i was able to afford what she could took, its her right not just a privileged and i don't expect you or any one to understand until you have experienced the plight of motherhood and child care with training, take the money back to her, kneel and apologies no one on this forum typing shit will ever love you or sacrifice halfway of what she can do for you. Just be grateful your mom is still healthy and alive regards

When she gave u the money you shouldn't have taken it. A boy child wouldn't

She is your mom and deserves the best but no mother would play such prank on her child that way..atleast she could have told you first before she went ahead to withdraw your money ..telling you first puts you in the position to decide if you can give her or not ..just apologize to her though she is your mom and only mother that cares about you ..

. This is funny, my mum is the complete opposite....She refuses every gift, you'll have to start talking, convincing and sometimes you need to force it on her...and I don't like that about her....

Madam, nothing is wrong with African parents....Give her the money, She's your mum....


Owkay, yeah she should have told you and all that,yeah she was wrong, buh taking back the money from her?. how did you do that? why did you do that?...
.Biko, return the money to her and do it nicely, apologize and all that....

Las las, you go dey alright. ....

OPTIMUSPRIME08:
Let me tell u the truth u deserve to know, u see all this comments and post about African parents this or that is total gibberish, i don't know how you were raised but for me the only thing my mom can't have of me is my soul. I trained my self half way through the uni (3rd to 5th grade) graduated and even as am typing this there is nothing my mom can't get from me as long as its mine, moro am rushing to pay off a debt (400k) she incured and has been trying to settle without my notice
if i were in your shoes i will even be happy i was able to afford what she could took, its her right not just a privileged and i don't expect you or any one to understand until you have experienced the plight of motherhood and child care with training, take the money back to her, kneel and apologies no one on this forum typing shit will ever love you or sacrifice halfway of what she can do for you. Just be grateful your mom is still healthy and alive regards

I can't even believe the comments posted by some peeps,... Somone even said if his mum bought something from him, she must pay for it... Lolz.... SMH..

You've said it all, Dear.....

Hear yourself dude. "If my mom do this and that foolish talk". Parent who do exactly as her mom did do not want the best for their children. She has started to put unecessary pressure on the girl and you are hear talking nonsense like it's cool.

OPTIMUSPRIME08:
Let me tell u the truth u deserve to know, u see all this comments and post about African parents this or that is total gibberish, i don't know how you were raised but for me the only thing my mom can't have of me is my soul. I trained my self half way through the uni (3rd to 5th grade) graduated and even as am typing this there is nothing my mom can't get from me as long as its mine, moro am rushing to pay off a debt (400k) she incured and has been trying to settle without my notice
if i were in your shoes i will even be happy i was able to afford what she could took, its her right not just a privileged and i don't expect you or any one to understand until you have experienced the plight of motherhood and child care with training, take the money back to her, kneel and apologies no one on this forum typing shit will ever love you or sacrifice halfway of what she can do for you. Just be grateful your mom is still healthy and alive regards

U may return the money now,but make it clear that your not happy with such actions,so that it won't repeat itself again.

Headlesschicken:
Africanz n dia backward mentality,no sensible parent should ever remind dia child bout how dey took care of em,cos nobody forced u to birth em,u were just doing what yuh supposed to do,n shouldn't ask for a honorary award 4doing yuh job,go n talk to her,buh don't give her sh!t,if what u said is how it happened den like i said before don't give her sh!t...

My dad did the exact same thing and told my mom and i to refund all the money he spent on me from infancy to adulthood.

You have no option than to still apologise to ur mom and settle things with her... Even though u don't return the money to her, cos u need for ur personal stuffs

First, what your mum did was wrong. No doubt about it. Of she had asked you to give her that money to meet those family needs, different thing. The fact that she had the money to give you back shows she was just making a power play on you. Unfortunately, it is typical. African typical.

However, though you had the right to be angry, collecting the money back was, well typical African wrong, if that makes any sense.

A similar thing happened to ne and yes, the fight was massive. My mother called everyone almost up to God in heaven himself and made clear her disapproval of my actions which were only African wrong but it was a massive business disaster. Well, I decided to apologise. It's my mother after all. Apologise for what? I just said sorry. For what? I'm sorry. For what? I'm just apologising. That was it. But I had to distance myself a little more from her. It wasn't nice, but it was necessary. African parents seem to have an issue understanding that their children are their own people and seem to believe they can run their children's lives the same way as when they were kids.

So my advice to you? Apologise. Return the money. But you will have to assert your independence in ways that will be more difficult and painful to you. You may need to keep that job to earn something because you may need to never ask her for financial assistance again. You're gonna have to work much harder than ever and make her see that you are now your own person.

Truth is they rralise what they have done. But they won't admit it. Even to themselves. But they know they crossed a line. And I bet that like my own mother, she'll make moves to mend that breach of trust. Afterall, she breached your trust. Not the other way round.


Except you didn't tell the whole story here in the first place.

Your success is beneath her foot.beg and apologize she is your mother.
You are a graduate now ,ehnehn and so what , is that the peak?
U better be calm coz u are a mother in making too

queenice7:
my mum is against me and been giving me attitude, I and her hasn't been in this kinda disagreement b4, and am getting worried and tryna compromise...
I just finished university, will serve next year and haven't gotten my result yet... my convocation is this month...
I did a petty work, just to keep myself busy for a month, took all the insults from my boss, all the sexual harassment from clients and all the sleeping late and waking up early just For 15k salary, I quitted de job... I told myself afterwards... Neva again will I stoop this low, am worth more... meanwhile I did that just to proudly say that "I was working" plus I wanted to be independent... and its my first work experience. so na, momsy was like, let's all av a feel of ur first salary na, I agreed wholeheartedly by sponsoring her and my sis hair making and buying stuffs for family use in our house... money remaining 10k, I have personal needs as a girl, plus I wanted to save too, so that was my intention for de rest of de money...
2 days later, my mum cunningly took my ATM and spent de 10k in there, I didn't know... till she told me moments later that she just used my money to do business that will benefit us as a family...
I got angry like wtf, coz coupled with the fact that she did that without my permission, that ain't right... instead she got angry too, she said all manner of things to me, that upon all the money she spent for my education, that i was stingy and reminded me that she pays the bills in de house and stuffs... I Neva said anything offensive that could av made her say many things that were uncalled for, @ that point I was silent, she counted de money from nowhere and gave to me, I collected it and went away. mind you, am from an average family so that money is nothing to my parents.
she has been giving me serious attitude since then and I consulted my uncle to talk to her, but instead he said I should go and apologise and give her back the money, I'll apologise, but I don't think I'll give de money... plss what is wrong with African parents.

you made a mistake, you shouldn't have collected the money