.

If you believe in prayers, you can pray for him, don't love him because he is good in bed.
You can't change him
Only him can do that if he wishes cos once he know your thought that would be an advantage for him and he will use you very well.

Think before you leap.

#peace_from_here

I put it to you that what you think is love, is actually just that feminine believe that you can change or "fix" a broken man. It's like how women think they can be the one to change or "fix" a bad boy/womenizer. The moment he finally stays, they realize they were actually attracted to the challenge and not the guy. Although if he has eyes like mine Then i believe you when you say "something about his eyes struck me"

Lol. The day he sees another lady who pities him better, he no go look ur side again o.

Get him some psych help as as soon as possible.
CBT + drugs to help stabilise his moods..

You need to be careful.. You're his girlfriend not his saviour!! Stop trying to fix.. Helping him to heal is the best you can do in a healthy way.

He also needs to want healing otherwise he sucks the life out of you.

Good luck and take care of your own mental health.


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Tedpgrass:
Get him some psych help as as soon as possible.
CBT + drugs to help stabilise his moods..

You need to be careful.. You're his girlfriend not his saviour!! Stop trying to fix.. Helping him to heal is the best you can do in a healthy way.

He also needs to want healing otherwise he sucks the life out of you.

Good luck and take care of your own mental health.


.

thank you.

stop saving people that cant be saved..you are the female version of white knight.thinking you can save someone and fix him..soon you will be drawn in his misery and be depressed yourself.

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lilwetdick:
stop saving people that cant be saved..you are the female version of white knight.thinking you can save someone and fix him..soon you will be drawn in his misery and be depressed yourself.

If only I can just standby and watch him self destruct.

You're using your hand to plan your craze.
Good luck!

Plebian:
If only I can just standby and watch him self destruct.

i understand you but then again, it is not your job to care for him rather a doctor or a psycologist.. the feeling you have is pity confused by love..it might work for both of you now but sincerely speaking you dont want your life passing away with regrets and depression.

can you handle his manic episode and depressive mood which can last for weeks ? can you help him reduce stress? if yes..i wish you good luck

Plebian:
I love cos I know he is a good and sensitive person that has been f*cked with, and I am not religious. thank you.

Okay o, safe journey

Wow..
OP genuinely loves him

Plebian:
If only I can just standby and watch him self destruct.

Interesting.

I think your boyfriend needs professional help.
He needs a psychiatrist. You should stay away.

Do you know that you can actually die from someone else's misery? — I'll advise you to close your eyes and move on because you are only precipitating your own disaster. You are not going to end up fixing him.

Emotional states are as infectious as diseases, and there's only one solution to infection: it's quarantine.

Hmmm

Plebian:
I met him at a party, something about his eyes struck me. we exchanged contacts and started talking.

He told me he was bipolar, but I did not think too seriously of it until we got sexual. I realized just how depressed and empty he felt. (an alcoholic too)

I thought in my corky mind I could save him, but I started realizing that his depression was rubbing off on me cos I was falling in love with him.

I decided to give distance, but I really couldn't stay away, he said he loves me but I don't think he fully understands what love is, I let him have his way most of the time. I try to handle his mood swings and multiple personalities, but I feel it's taking a toll on my mental too.

He begs me not to leave him, but he would be emotional distance for days, I am heads over heels in love with him, and I want to help him get better I just don't know how to.

Among all the eligible bachelors in Nigeria, you choose to fall in love with a bipolar guy. Why do ladies like stress? They will turn down a good guy then date a womaniser and try make him a good guy.

Firstly, you can't change anyone only if he or she decides to make a U-turn.
Secondly, anytime he treats you like shits he blames it on bipolar. Be awoke sis.

stay with him for a while.. things will get better
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Oluromantic:
Lol. The day he sees another lady who pities him better, he no go look ur side again o.

I don't care if we end up together, so long as he is better. I will be content.

I Only Came Here To Learn

Well go ahead who knows you might save him, the eye connection wasn't ordinary you were sent to help him

All I can infer is that you are a brilliant mind and just like you read and understand texts, your mind is wont to read and understand this man. You are deeply intrigued by his enigmatism. The moment you figure him out, you'll fall out of 'love' with him. You are not in love with him, you are infatuated in a different kind of way.

There are drugs to keep him stable. Go visit a psychiatrist

I do not respond to post often except in cases like this.

OP, you are a smart person. I can tell that from miles away.

When dealing with mental health issues we have to be careful because it is usually complex. In this case I'll advice you avoid the saviour complex and let him see reasons why he should see a Psychologist or a Psychiatrist. You do this while still showing empathy and reassuring him that you are here for him.

I'll also advise that you see the same psychologist to teach you how to(and how not to) relate with him or read up on it. This is because people tend to be at loss as to how to relate with people with mental health diagnosis for instance they may begin to treat them as if they are fragile and this will have adverse effects.

NB: MentallyAwareNG (find them on google/twitter/IG) offers pro bono mental health services.


Big ups.

To fix him is a psychiatrist's job, not yours. The ability to handle a patient's case without letting it rub off on you is a skill on its own that they teach psychiatrists, social workers, and the like in school.
Playing the psychiatrist may not only worsen his condition, you will be ruined as well.

Plebian:
I don't care if we end up together, so long as he is better. I will be content.

Permit me to diagress a bit, why aren't you using your regular moniker?

Gulher:
To fix him is a psychiatrist's job, not yours. The ability to handle a patient's case without letting it rub off on you is a skill on its own that they teach psychiatrists, social workers, and the like in school.
Playing the psychiatrist may not only worsen his condition, you will be ruined as well.

Spot on.

graciousolo:
I do not respond to post often except in cases like this.

OP, you are a smart person. I can tell that from miles away.

When dealing with mental health issues we have to be careful because it is usually complex. In this case I'll advice you avoid the saviour complex and let him see reasons why he should see a Psychologist or a Psychiatrist. You do this while still showing empathy and reassuring him that you are here for him.

I'll also advise that you see the same psychologist to teach you how to(and how not to) relate with him or read up on it. This is because people tend to be at loss as to how to relate with people with mental health diagnosis for instance they may begin to treat them as if they are fragile and this will have adverse effects.

NB: MentallyAwareNG (find them on google/twitter/IG) offers pro bono mental health services.


Big ups.

Good one.

Plebian:
He is genuinely a good man that has been hurt, betrayed and had a difficult childhood,( witnessed and suffered abuse) I know and believe he is redeemable.

My dear good luck, I don't have strength for that. I will rather stick to the one that is already redeemed than try to be Jesus, Nigeria is stress is more than enough.

ERORR404:
I put it to you that what you think is love, is actually just that feminine believe that you can change or "fix" a broken man. It's like how women think they can be the one to change or "fix" a bad boy/womenizer. The moment he finally stays, they realize they were actually attracted to the challenge and not the guy. Although if he has eyes like mine Then i believe you when you say "something about his eyes struck me"

Exactly my thought, I don't know why ladies are built that way. Want to be a saviour, at the end they will get burn. Probably then it will be too late. Always fall in love with the drunk, womaniser and smoker. (Bad boy)