chiboy1116:
u must be very stupid , no?

rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW

Amanee:
Not everything works out as planned, you should have also prepared for this outcome when you decided to confess... I think you should be more concerned with your peace of mind now that you've fessed up than any fake bliss you were enjoying. You did the right thing by confessing and if your marriage has to end for it, then so be it. Take this as a crucial lesson and move on

Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

RiyadhGoddess:





You are not God and thank God, God is not man

rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW

rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW

Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

Amanee:
Not everything works out as planned, you should have also prepared for this outcome when you decided to confess... I think you should be more concerned with your peace of mind now that you've fessed up than any fake bliss you were enjoying. You did the right thing by confessing and if your marriage has to end for it, then so be it. Take this as a crucial lesson and move on

svc1:
If you had followed this thread, you would understand that the said lady is not repentant of her atrocity. Remember she said she craves for more sexual pleasure from her colleague and also stalks him on SM.
Now to my own opinion. A married woman won't sleep with another man that is not her husband, if she's still sexually attracted to her husband.. in short women are not built that way. Before a woman sleep with a man that's not her spouse, it takes a whole lot of emotional attachments to give in.. she practically burns out and gives in.. But when she does, there's no going back. Its like Sisqo just went lose on her emotion..
The said poster is not sexually attracted to her husband in the first place, so it's easy for her to give into sexual advancement from men she's sexually attracted to because if she continues in that same marriage, she would just be a shadow of herself, and the husband "go take her eyes see sometin".
I would advice you stick with the divorce, get a good lawyer to defend you and fight for u and ur kids (child support is very importanter).
In future try to have a good rapo with ur ex hubby for ur children's sake..

No one should blame u, U are not attracted to old men shikena.. U married him cos he was ready and d men ur age weren't ready to settle down..

Raalsalghul:

This is the best advice so far. I don't know why people are so bent on making the marriage work.

Pretty obvious that the Op is not attracted to her husband.

I remember her hinting that she would do it again given the chance.

If you ask me, the divorce is a good thing.
I hope our potential peace makers Kunleweb, riyadhgoddess and whoever should take note.
The lady does not love her husband

Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

Chamber2000:
I love this comment but I won't marry you

SexynSerious:
What do you mean "being a single mother at this age"?

Did you cheat with yourself? Move in with the dude you cheated with and force him to marry you asap. He has broken your happy home now he should step up and take responsibility. Nothing more nothing less.

sisisioge:
Chai! You confessed! Lordylordy!

I always knew you weren't much of a bright woman, didn't know it was this bad. Well, take heart. Remember he wasn't so appealing to you before now. Simply gather yourself together and forge ahead.

You will be fine last last.

Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

ped007:

I read her first story, and trust me dear...
She'll do it again 10times over. Just that she won't apologise again.

springtech:


Who cares if you believe what the OP said or not.
I sense you are such a great LIAR too, hence you suspect everyone to be a LIAR like you.
Someone just told you what she is going/went through as innocently as possible, all you could think of is to label her a liar.

Biko, just negodu.

I had an experience in November last year.
I was to pay my house rent in October & i also needed to make a repayment of a given sum to my creditor.
I had it all planned such that with what i expected to come in as income for November, i would easily settle the 2 obligations easily.

So November came , my landlord called me if i would be able to meet up with the payment by month end, i confidently told him YES.
The expected money came in , in FULL yet i was not able to make the payment as promised.
hence the landlord tagged me a liar.

Now let me explained what happened:
1. The cash came in as expected on the 30th of Novemeber, 2018.
It was a friday. So because of the volume involved, i went to the bank, specifically it was ECO bank.
I filled a funds transfer form for the 2 obligations.
However, it happened that Eco bank just did an upgrade that messed up their system.
So they could not effect my transfer that day. You are free to verify this upgrade thing of Nov 2018.

Meanwhile , i called the 2 people involved that i just left the bank so they should expect their cash that day.
At this time, i had no idea of the upgrade. so i was very confident they would both get their cash before the end of the day.

2. Saturday, Dec 1st ---- transaction not effected yet
3. Sunday, Dec 2nd ---- as at 12 noon, transaction not effected
And the kind call i had been getting was getting me agitated already.
So i left church, with an idea.
I went straight to an ECO bank ATM to do an ATM transfer to my creditor who has also been on my neck, since i had not been debited yet.
This transaction failed.
I did a cash withdrawal, it also failed. This suggested to me that they still had not resolved their issue (talking of Ecobank).
Then i went to another bank, Stanbic IBTC, i did an ATM withdrawal, it was successful.
This gave me the courage to try an ATM transfer to the creditor.
I did, but it failed but i was debited immediately but the guy never got the cash.

All along i had initiated a conversation with the customer care of Ecobank both on phone, on the website and mail.

On monday Dec 3rd i had to visit a branch of Ecobank to lodge a complaint. Yet nothing was done.
On tuesday, Dec 4th before reporting at my office, i went to another branch of Ecobank to lay another complaint. Nothing was done.
*I admit at this point i should have withdrawn the form i filled earlier, but i guess because of the stress and all, i did not do this.

So as i was leaving the branch i got a debit alert of the same sum which i already got (i mean the ATM transfer debit). By this i knew the 2nd debit was for one of the transactions i initiated on friday (remember the funds transfer fund i initiated).
So, in summary, i had 2 transactions of the same amount. That of the ATM that was not successful but i was debited for, and then that of the funds transfer form which i just got debited for (which was successful). The recipient called me to tell me he just got it as soon as i got the debit alert.

By now, the balance i had left in my account was not enough to satisfy the 2nd transcation which was for my land lord.

All this happened in 4 days, btw Friday Nov 30th & Monday Dec 1st 2018.

At this point i had to call my landlord again to break down the whole thing to him. This was my 3rd call to him during the entire ordeal.
What did he say?
He said exactly what you just. That i was a liar. That i should not think everyone was daft.

Only i, knew what i went through in those 4 days.
Only i, knew i never lied a bit.
Only i knew the sleeplessness, apprehension, anxiety i had during the period.
Yet what did i hear? I was a liar.

So mr Wiseman, not everyone is a liar.
Even though i am not there with her, i BELIEVE her 100%


If you blame her for what she did wrong, no wahala, but if you are saying she is a liar just because of everything that transpired in 11 days.
That is so lame.
I dare say, even 11 days is too long a time to achieve/experience all she narrated.
Whatever the mind desires to achieve, no force can stop it. Not even hell.

Do you know the pains, trauma, abuses, irritation, anguish, ill feelings, ill-treatment she experienced that would have pushed her to get that accommodation?

Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew.

fx45:
Poco Poco... I've heard alot about you. The arch Nairaland feminist and serial spinster. Anyway I believe one day we'll get to meet

Arkmanbuddy:



Mehn, how many books have you written?! You should try being a novelist. Damn you're good!