TITLE :- LOCAL MAN


MONOLOGUE

_These Days, Pets Are Better Than Some People. You'll Likely End Up Disappointed If You Think People Will Care For You The Way You Care For Them. Some People Only Exist As An Example Of What To Avoid. I Used To Be Scared Of Beast And Demons But Now I'm Afraid Of People. Everyday Of My Life, I'm Forced To Add Another Name To The List Of People Who Pissed Me Off. Some People Are Better Off Missing Than Being Around. If I Could Turn Back Time, I Would Avoid Meeting Some People In The First Place._

_People These Days Are More Complicated Than Maths. Don't Be Too Confidence When Someone Tells You They Like You, The Real Question Is Until When?._

Chapter 1

I Sat Down Facing My Thoughts, Looking Squarely At My Reflection In The Mirror. I Never Liked What I See Each Time I Do That, I'm Not Proud Of What I Have Become. I Looked Down On The Bed To The Sight Of Empty Bottles, Smocked Cigarette, My Axe And The Blood Stained Shirt. It's Been 7 Months Since I Was Given The Red Beret, A Customized Axe With The Name STRIKER Boldly Written On It.

Black Had Earlier Sent A Code, With The Picture Of A Subject To Be Taken Out. My Job Was To Flush Soul Out Of The Living, To Kill. I Wonder Who Needed To Be Killed Again This Time. Brought Out My Tool Box From It Right Position After Which I Assembled My Toys On The Bed. This Has Been My Usual Routine For The Past 7 Months. I Have In Total - 29 Tools Which I Have Used In Claiming Souls. They're Numbered According To The Age Of Subject. The Man I Executed Last Night Was Just 54Yrs Of Age - I Do Not Have A Tool For His Age, So I Ordered For A New Tool And Numbered It After Him; Tool No 54. Such Tool Then Would Be Used To Take Out Any 54Yrs Aged Subject.

I Opened The Code Which Black Had Sent And What I Saw Got Me Thinking - The Picture Of Dr Rabiu Starred At Me, I Finally Got The Opportunity To Meet With The Devil Who Failed Me During My Undergraduate Days Because I Refused To Hand Over My Favorite Chick To Him. Lara A Budicious Teen Who Find Solace Riding My Dick, But It Is Unfortunate I Had To Kill Her During My Initiation Process. To Prove My Loyalty And Sincerely And Willingness To Join The League Of Men.

Mr Rabiu Is Just 67, He Wouldn't Be Needing A New Tool. I Checked For Other Necessary Details After Which I Created A Folder In His Name. I Copied His Mobile Number With The Hope Of Giving Him A Call Later To Know How Life Has Been Treating Him But That Would Be After Today's Church Service. I Collected The Vodka Bottles And Cigarette Sticks From The Bed, Put Them In A Bin And Made To Dispose Them Outside.

All These While My Phone Was In My Hand Scrolling Through My WhatsApp Messages. I Had About 75 Direct Messages That Needed Fast Replies So I Rested My Back On The Kitchen Wall Typing And Replying The Messages. I Was Still On This When I Overheard Two People Discussing About A Neighbor They've Secretly Been Tripping For. I Thought I Wasn't Hearing Right So I Continued With The Typing But Stopped Abruptly When My Name Was Mentioned. I Wasn't Really Familiar With My Neighbors, Though I Lived Close But I Have Always Stayed Out Of Reach And Even When There Was The Need For Any Contributions, I Was Always Making Direct Payment To The Land Lord. So There Wasn't Any Need To Talk To Any About Other Thing. I Wasn't Bothered About Who And Who Was Talking But I Was Interested In Why They Choose To Talk About Me. I Was About Stepping Into The Kitchen To Find Out From Them When Pastor's Call Came In. I Hurried To The Waste Bin And Dispose Off The Waste.

My Phone Continued To Shout For Attention. It Was My Pastor Calling And I Needed No One To Tell Me Why He Was Doing So. I Sprayed The Room With Air Freshener, Then I Hurried Into The Bathroom To Scrub Moist Off My Fleshy Body. In 10 Minutes, I Was Already On My Way To Church, I Have My Separate Bike So There Wasn't The Need To Mount Another Man's Bike. I Raced Straight To The Church Compound And Parked My Motorbike In My Private Spot. Collected My Bible From The Back, Wore The Fancy Rosery, Sprayed Perfume And Put On An Innocent Smile. Immediately I Stepped Into The Church, All Choir Members Stood To Their Feet. Good Morning Master - They Chorused.

I Climbed Up The Stage Where Pastor Was Standing To Hand Over The Store Key To Him. He Shakes His Head As He Receives The Key. A Nod Which I Understood To Be A Sorry One. Go To Your Department, We'll Discuss After The Service - He Said. I Looked Back At Him, Knowing He Would Someday Open His Bible To Find A List Of His Sins In One Of The Pages. I Know God Is Always Busy And Wouldn't Serve Him His Cup Of Tea Anytime Soon. But I Am Never Busy, No One Gets Away With Disrespecting Me. Those Who Promised To Love Me Forever Only To Stop Loving Me, Have Stopped Breathing. I Am That Type Of Friend That Helps A Friend Hide A Corpse, And A Friend That Wants To Bleep Me Up Should Know I Know How To Hide A Corpse.

As The Choir Leader, Instead Of Helping The Choir Members Choose A Song For The Day. I Rather Choose A Fair And Preety Lady For The Leading Role. I Know What Moltivates The Congregation, A Breastful And Budicious Lady Does Wonders In Our Type Of Church. Pastor Has Once Asked Why The Members Weren't Singing Along To Sister Titi's Sonorous Song. I Couldn't Give Him A Reasonable Response Not Until I Told Sister Gbonjubola To Take Over The Mic Stand. Even NEPA Brought Light And The Whole Church Shouted Up NEPA - Sister Gbonjubola Was The Light. What She Has In Her Front Is A Motivator, Conductor, A Stabilizer And A Dick Riser. One Could Masturbate With Her Voice If It's Put On Record.


Watch Out For Episode 2
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Story Title :- Local Man
Chapter 2
Atrocious Write It.
...............

Local Man Thought Growing Up Would Be Interesting, Thinking Childhood Doesn’t Fit His Personality So He Ignored The Rainy Plays Hoping The Future Has Something In Store For Him But Soon, He Was Disappointed When The Society He Looked Up To Couldn’t Stand For Itself. The Society Is A Lie, The Media And The Profile He Comes In Contact With Has Been Toyed With, Users And Their Pictures Don’t Look Alike. He Only Wanted To Grow Up And Enjoy The Fun That Nature Brings But Love And Heart Breaks Wasn’t Part Of It For He Never Wanted To Be Weak, To Be In Love For Him – Is To Be Weak. So He Pushed Everyone Away, Not That He Doesn’t Care But He Doesn’t Want To Be Venerable. He Kept His Space The Same Way He Keeps His Spade, He Is The Human Version Of Headache, The One Who Drives Karma Bus, A Bedtime Story Read At Dawn, He Faked His Existence The Way Bitches Fake Love And Until He Is Done - He’ll Continue To Have Multiple Faces.
Church Programme Wasn’t His Thing; The Sermon The Pastor Was Spewing Holds No Meaning To Him So He Walks Behind The Church To Smoke Some Cigarette Sticks While He Thinks On How Best To Carry Out His Deed.


(Dr Rabiu’s Place)
Having Received His Salary For The Month, He Called Few Of His Friends To Join Him At Their Cool Spot And About Three Of His Slot. A Man Of His Age Is Meant To Be In The Balcony Sipping A Cup Of Coffee, Exercising Or Watching News On TV But Dr Rabiu Chooses To Be Stupid. He Puts On A Short Jean With An Armless Top And A Face Cap While Smiling And Starting At His Reflection In The Mirror – Whoever Gave Birth To This Man Deserves A Slap On The Vigina.


(Church Premises)
Local Man (Striker) Collects His Phone From His Pocket As It Began To Make Sudden Beep. What Could Be Wrong (He Thought), So He Checked His Notification Panel For The Fault. But It Was His Gps Notifying Him Of Movement Of The Subject He Has Placed On The Track List, (Damn It – He Said). He Never Thought Dr Rabiu Would Leave His Compound Today Because It Was A Sunday And Most Days Like This, People Of His Caliber Are Meant To Be In The Corner Of Their Rooms Lying Down Or Taking A Nap. He Had No Idea Of Where He (Dr Rabiu) Was Heading To Or Maybe He Had Found Out About His Line Being Tracked. Many Thoughts Raced Through His (Striker) Mind At That Moment, Should He Place The Mission On Hold Or Proceed With It But He No More Fears Defeat And The Only Thing He Has Ever Lost In His Life Was His Heart, He Lost It The Day Florence (His Girlfriend) Stopped Being His. He’s Been So Heartless Since Then And Nothing On This Planet Which He Stays Could Make Him Sweat.

He Looked Again At The Ignition/Movement On His Tab. He Hadn’t Make Any Plan To Execute Anyone That Day Because It’s Still A Sunday, He Always Dedicates The Day Such Days To God Because He Knows For Sure He’s On The Right Path Of His. He Read Somewhere That All His Sins Would Be Accounted For But Only If He Is Unable To Give God A Reason For His Deed; So He Said. If Gods Asks For A Reason Why I Would Be Allowed Into Heaven, I Would Say To Him – That Because I Never Killed Nor Sinned On Sundays And Never Have I Crossed The Path Of Any Of His Being Named Sunday.

Local Man (Striker) Wouldn’t Let The Day Pass Without Knowing What Dr Rabiu Was Up To, So He Quickly Drafted A Message To Kemi Telling Her To Come Cook For Him At His Place That Evening. He Did That So He Wouldn’t Sleep Without Taking Food In Case He Returns Late. He Leaves The Church Premises Without Informing Anyone - Not Even The Pastor Or Any Of The Choir Members. He’s Unbothered About Other People And Only Does His Mind Directives. He Looked At His Watch And Place Placed It On Time Records As He Moves Out Of The Church Premises.
His Tab Is Glued To The Rear Front Of His Baby¬-Bike To Allow In Follow The Ignition And Every Turns Dr Rabiu Makes.


(Dr Rabi’s Place)

He Steps Out Of His Building Having Stacked Much Cash In His Pocket. His Key Dangles In His Hand As He Walks Toward One Of His Favorite Jeeps, Many Wishes Runs Through His Mind. He Thought Of What He Would Order For Or Take When He Gets To The Cool Spot. Also, Which Among His Whores He Would Get Busy With And Which Hotel And Size Of Bed Would Be Best For The Sex Skill He’s Been Practicing? He Twist His Waist In Excitement Of What He Was Going To Be Doing That Day And At The Same Time Faking Pity In Advance For The Girl He’s Going To Be Sleeping With – All These Were His Thought As He Opens His Jeep’s Door.

Soon, Dr Rabiu Was On His Way To The Said Spot. Blazing From His Car Speakers Is One Of Kabex’s Song (Kabex – Poorlitics). He Listens With Rapt Attention As He Proceeds On His Journey.


(Local Man)
Striker Continues To Take Turns And Trips, He Believed So Much In The Map He Was Following Knowing It Wouldn’t Disappoint By Taking Him Through A Round Route. He Looked Around The Roads And Building Which Still Looked The Same To Him During His Undergraduate Days. The Only Thing That Didn’t Look The Same Was The Road. He Passed Through His Course Mate Resident Being A Place He Mostly Visits When He Returns From Lectures During Those Days. How Time Flies (He Said). He Was About To Look Back At His Tab For The Next Turn When He Was Run Over By A Coming Jeep. (A Jeep Dr Rabiu Was Driving.


Chapter 3
Written By Atrocious Writer.
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