The discrimination the society have against the single ladies must stop.

My 3 experiences.

First experience
A question was asked in Church Sunday school this passed Sunday. "What can be done to raise a Godly family " Other members were giving their opinions. I raised up my hand to give my own opinion and the coordinator asked if I was married, that I can't make contributions if I wasn't married. I had a genuine answer to that question but not being married was more important than what my brain could deliver. Let it pass as I didn't give him the satisfaction of knowing if I was married or not.

Second Experience
I was in a place, a local government office. Waiting to be attended to. I was supposed to go before a lady so I stepped forward but the the government worker turned me back and called her instead . The lady she called demanded to know why, and she said in Yoruba that "don't mind this new generation children, they don't have respect. Didn't she see the ring on your hand showing that you are a married woman". Besides she did not greet me when she walked in. The lady insisted she would wait for her turn and she should do the right thing. The lady took her sit and nudged me to step forward. She grudgingly attended to me. This government worker was an elderly woman.

Third Experience
I went to RTC park in port Harcourt to deliver a goods to my customer that lives in Imo State. A young lady was asked to be patient so they could attend to a married woman, telling her she was more important because she needed to go back home and cook for her husband while her own boyfriend can always hang out in chicken republic. All these was said to her in a funny way and to them it was supposed to be a joke. Because of how it was said, the lady didn't know how to react . She smiled and the married woman took her slot. I was livid where I sat.

Now I want to ask, is there a special kind intelligence, a special brain, smartness, financial status upgrade, breakthrough in cancer research? Increase in the value of the Naira that comes with being married because I don't understand. Help me understand.

Once a customer was nasty to me, I kept my cool because that was my job. One of my customer was very nasty to me yesterday Oh she was very nasty and difficult but I was professional about offering my service to her. Yours truly couldn't take it and went out to cool off.

Fam! You won't believe my customer's new attitude towards me. Where did all the nastiness go? She was all sweet and cool and loving and hmm. And oh, before now, she had her wedding ring on her finger in my face so I could see clearly she was married. So she needs the respect accorded to married women not knowing that some people have been in marriage before her

Why?

What has the singles done to deserve these. When did becoming single turn to a sickness? Why is the society mean to the singles that even a bus conductor that has not washed his boxers in days would have the temerity to shout at a girl to go and marry. It makes my skin crawl. Don't try that around me because I will buy the case. It is as a result of the injustice and meanness towards the singles that make the ill guided ones rush into marriage. Anything, just come, as far as you are a man. Just to escape the brutality of their fellow human just because they don't have the Mr/Mrs tag. Tag. A tag? A tag that can be detached at anytime. Something that is not promised. What about the married ones that cut off all ties with their unmarried friends. Really? I am coming for you. I will dedicate a day post for you because I want to know your reasons. I really want to know.

Dear single ladies, Listen to me. Own your singleness and walk with your shoulder up high. Don't allow anybody pressure you or bully you into marriage. Don't make the wrong choice because you want to be seen as reasonable human. Nothing is wrong with you. You are perfect and enough. In fact you are more intelligent and you engage your brains more than most of the married people. Yes, I said it.

You may be surprised they are jealous of you so they want to push you into the wrong hand to share in their misery. You may be surprised many of the married once would jump at the opportunity to opt out of their marriage. They want to be single again. If only they can do things differently, make their decisions differently. You don't know the time and opportunity you have as singles. Opportunity to learn from other people's mistakes and make the right decision. Don't let anybody make you feel otherwise. Take your time and choose the kinda man/woman you love to live with the rest of your life. The most important thing in marriage is love, check if you love that person before you jump into marriage. Cut off anyone that makes you feel uncomfortable with your singleness, they don't have your interest at heart. Don't settle for less because of society judgment of you.

Pray, work hard, work for your money . Enjoy your amazing life, Stay beautiful, stay hydrated. Have sex because you want to. Stop feeling guilty about it. Be a bad ass defender of yourself from bullshit. You will marry when it's your time, that is if you want to because the society is still insensitive to the fact that many don't want marriage. They just want to live.

Stay beautiful and keep peppering them. You are enough.

Long post again. Surely it will speak to someone.
Love from me to you.
https://www.nairaland.com/5144676/single-parent-group-spg-2019

Try marry too. If you can’t beat them, join them or keep calm and enjoy your status.

Oh shut up please

viccipedia:
Try marry too. If you can’t beat them, join them or keep calm and enjoy your status.

What you're experience is a cultural phenomenon common in African and some Asian societies. Since you cannot eliminate behaviours that have cultural undertones without getting rid of the cultural foundations itself, you may as well learn to ignore some things and just do you.

I have learnt to ignore

missjo:
What you're experience is a cultural phenomenon common in African and some Asian societies. Since you cannot eliminate behaviours that have cultural undertones without getting rid of the cultural foundations itself, you may as well learn to ignore some things and just do you.

yazga:
I have learnt to ignore

Super

If you Don marry, you for no get the time to type this book of lamentations .
First incident, you want go hospital go give medical advice when you no be doctor?

Second incident, you should learn to acknowledge any and everyone you meet in a place, it would take nothing from you.

Third incident, no justification for what they did but people would give greater preference to those with greater responsibilities, that's if you consider a bf as a responsibility .

It's even worst if the so called married woman is perceived as rich or has rich husband.

It's the culture. That's why a lady will wanna die inside abusive marriage because she dont want to lose the respect that comes with the ring.

yazga:
Oh shut up please

everything in life comes with pros and cons. Every achievement and otherwise comes with a status. Ex convicts can’t get good jobs, just as graduates are likely to get better jobs than undergraduates. Pregnant women and disabled people are treated with care, and so on...

The begging question therefore is.. Why is the married women vs single women treatment any different?

Clean answer: African civilization is different from western civilization.

Your outburst was quite unnecessary, but I can see that your single status is really paining you.

My advice: Do something about it.

yazga:
Oh shut up please

your second experience is really interesting judging by the fact that it came form a woman.
You can go against societal construct but it's often a rough path. Being a married woman gives you alot of undue advantages especially if you are pregnant.
I learnt this during my NYSC

Believe me dear I can understand every bit of the anger and irritation....It's not one's fault esp the single ladies that they aren't married yet but truth be told the rate of irresponsibility and moral decadence on the part of our single sisters is quite alarming,no wonder the older generation find it repulsive....They tend to think their uncouth behaviour is the reason many are still single and society hasn't done our single sisters any good...The pressure on them to marry is overwhelming no wonder the high rate of divorce cos people now marry for the wrong reasons....Be that as it may, do not let anyone,i repeat,do not let anyone or circumstances coerce you into marriage....Nobody's happiness or fulfillment hinges on another,so if U find fulfillment in doing what u love,keep doing it and if u find true happiness in marriage,then go for it....Life is too short to dwell on regrets....have a good day fam...

Am speechless on dis!