Failing 1st year

The day I had running stomach.
Went to church that faithful Sunday morning, only for my village people to find me come church .

And church was far from ekosodi were my hostel was.

Before I reach house, some organic material don discharge. The bike man that carried me was like, wetin dey smell?

I just lock up...

The okada guy was forced to end the trip mid way.

Na so I trek reach house, using all the Koro.


As I reach house dey thank God say people don go church, na so my babe just Waka come, unannounced.

Chai, as she just enter bunk, na so she cover nose.

Mehn it was so embarrassing.

Can't forget that incidence.

Rapmoney:
Throwback Thursday: Your Most Embarrassing Moment On Campus

At one time or the other, we all had one embarrassing moment on campus that one would remember and just laugh...especially, after many years have gone by.

Mine:

In my 2nd year in school, I was chilling at Nwanyi Nempi pepper soup joint after a long boring lecture from a lecturer who took sadism as a hobby. I had a cold HARP in my front (mortuary standard). I say make I take am dey hold conscience because the stress too much for department. Not long, I saw this tall pretty light-skin girl passing. I was instantly attracted to her but I didn't follow her. I grew up with the mentality of not stopping a girl on the road; especially, when you are not coming from an opposite direction. I quickly did a research on her by asking someone at the joint as if I was working as an investigative journalist for Channels TV!!! I was able to get her name, level and department and the info that she's an 'aje-butter' from a known family in Onitsha. From that minute, I started plotting my 'graph'.

The next day, I planned I would approach her. After my first lecture, I went straight to her department (Computer Science) to accomplish my mission. Na so I spread like virus full everywhere...well polished shoes, starched and well pressed shirt, new haircut...come dey form James Bond. After hanging around for some time without seeing her, I decided it was an unsuccessful trip.

That same day, while discussing with friends at photo stands (where school photographers stayed), I saw her approaching. I pinched myself secretly and told myself that it is 'Now or Never'. Based on say I be Warri boy, I nor fit carry last. Right there, as crowded as the place was, I approached her and that was the killing mistake I made. This was what happened:

Me: Hi, Onyinyechi, how are you doing?

Babe: How did you know my name?

Me: They say when you're interested in someone, you would also be interested in things that pertain to them.

Babe: Really? You've not answered my question and moreover, I don't know you.

Me: OK, I got to know your name from a friend in your department. I'm interested in you...

Babe: (Speaking loudly and angrily to the hearing of every student present) You should have something better doing! Pls don't ever stop me again! Now take some steps back and behave as if this conversation never took place!!!

Ogbeni, na so I pose like vulture wey rain beat...right there wey I stand, malaria, typhoid and diarrhoea hold me at once. I come stand like image wey deh carve for shrine One side of my belle come dey do me like say I wan weewee, the other side come dey do me like say I wan poopoo. To look back na problem. Crowd of guys and babes dey observe me like cinema. Even my guys sef dey help me dey shame! I was receiving consoling pats on the back as if say my palee kpai! Dem say when house fall, goat go climb the roof. Na the courage say at least Warri boy try to try I take waka pass school gate that day. I nor gree show face for photo stands through out that semester.

It's been 18 years now but each time I remember this event, I just laugh it off as my most embarrassing moment on campus.

Guy ur 4king funny, i don laff tire dis night

Yoouthu:
Well as an upcoming artiste I registered to perform at my University carnival. I was a very shy introvert so I decided to take some substances so as to gain confidence to perform in front of the crowd. Voila my time came and I was called on stage. What really happened I still can't remember all I know was that I started seeing stones, corn Hobbs(shuku agbado), bottle being thrown at me. The M.C just came to put his arm around me and walked me off the stage politely. How I didn't commit suicide that day I don't know. The most painful part was a girl that I was about to knack that was there. The girl said she saw someone that looks like me on stage. Me wey I be ode instead of me to deny I said yes na so she block me ooo. My only chance of getting laid at the University. 3 years after University at 25 am still a virgin na wa oo.

Ya I can relate, it must have been so......

campus ,

this is not for me

I have embarrassing moments

but as I no go school

let me sit and read

.

Are you male or female
teuote author=LordAzubuike post=83437198] As an ugly boy, back then in campus, the ladies gave me a whole lotta unforgettable embarrassing moments. [/quote]

My most embarrassing moment should be during the 100 level clearance

Lol

PrimadonnaO:
John Harris library. Those really mean lady porters.

One of them said my skirt was TOO short and I couldn’t go in. It was unbelievable because the skirt was obviously knee-length. I was trying to state my case that knee-length has never been regarded as too short for the library. One of them just screamed at me. I totally hate being screamed at.

I was at the verge of tears. My boyfriend then was just walking in... I told him I was asked to go back home and he started laughing. Lol. That one was just a clown. I almost broke up with him that day, but he didn’t leave me standing outside. He stayed there with me laughing endlessly.

Well, a male porter came and allowed me go in.

Uniben babe wey no get gra gra

Mine was in 100lvl
After eating mama put rice and stew before exam Suddenly Hot shit catch me for lecture hall during exam.. So I had to hold it with every muscle in my buttocks, so as to not fall my hands and poo on myself in front of more than 200 ppl in that hall..
.it became unbearable I had to submit without finishing. Even my friends sitting at my front were angry they thought i had seen expo and finished first and went to submit without helping them due to the way i rushed to submit. Only if they knew the bomb i was holding in my buttocks..chaii
I just ran all the way to law department not far from hall and Thank God it was empty So I Took a Big Shit on the empty class and used my question paper as tissue..
That class is always busy but on that day God said He will make way where there seems to be no way.. A huge sign of relief came over me. Ever since I reduced eating mama put

my own simple

two ladies fight over me
Las Las I no get any of them

I was late for a very important meeting at the school chapel, na so I start dey run like who buffalo dey pursue, I no know when I step on some wicked ants didn't take notice as some dey take position for my trouser, crawling up to my na so I reach the meeting, take seat for front as an Exco, I felt the first bite, I lock up, because I feel say my brain never settle. The next thing I know, na jump I jump from my chair, shout like who one nut loose from head. I almost naked for people front. They laugh me that day no be small.

The thought of it is making me laugh out loud.....

Here is it was walking back from lecture all by myself to be honest I was really stressed and hungry I had set out early that day as I had 6am class, you know how difficult those days as a 200level law student. Was walking back through my department I had this feeling that I was alone and no one was coming at my back so decided to fart hehehehe it was loud that when I turned to look if it was only me, behold this three guys were behind me... heaven came down on me that day hehehehe

Did I mention they were cute ooh lord i was so ashamed of my self and destiny

Kai very embarrassing

Rapmoney:
Throwback Thursday: Your Most Embarrassing Moment On Campus

At one time or the other, we all had one embarrassing moment on campus that one would remember and just laugh...especially, after many years have gone by.

Mine:

In my 2nd year in school, I was chilling at Nwanyi Nempi pepper soup joint after a long boring lecture from a lecturer who took sadism as a hobby. I had a cold HARP in my front (mortuary standard). I say make I take am dey hold conscience because the stress too much for department. Not long, I saw this tall pretty light-skin girl passing. I was instantly attracted to her but I didn't follow her. I grew up with the mentality of not stopping a girl on the road; especially, when you are not coming from an opposite direction. I quickly did a research on her by asking someone at the joint as if I was working as an investigative journalist for Channels TV!!! I was able to get her name, level and department and the info that she's an 'aje-butter' from a known family in Onitsha. From that minute, I started plotting my 'graph'.

The next day, I planned I would approach her. After my first lecture, I went straight to her department (Computer Science) to accomplish my mission. Na so I spread like virus full everywhere...well polished shoes, starched and well pressed shirt, new haircut...come dey form James Bond. After hanging around for some time without seeing her, I decided it was an unsuccessful trip.

That same day, while discussing with friends at photo stands (where school photographers stayed), I saw her approaching. I pinched myself secretly and told myself that it is 'Now or Never'. Based on say I be Warri boy, I nor fit carry last. Right there, as crowded as the place was, I approached her and that was the killing mistake I made. This was what happened:

Me: Hi, Onyinyechi, how are you doing?

Babe: How did you know my name?

Me: They say when you're interested in someone, you would also be interested in things that pertain to them.

Babe: Really? You've not answered my question and moreover, I don't know you.

Me: OK, I got to know your name from a friend in your department. I'm interested in you...

Babe: (Speaking loudly and angrily to the hearing of every student present) You should have something better doing! Pls don't ever stop me again! Now take some steps back and behave as if this conversation never took place!!!

Ogbeni, na so I pose like vulture wey rain beat...right there wey I stand, malaria, typhoid and diarrhoea hold me at once. I come stand like image wey deh carve for shrine One side of my belle come dey do me like say I wan weewee, the other side come dey do me like say I wan poopoo. To look back na problem. Crowd of guys and babes dey observe me like cinema. Even my guys sef dey help me dey shame! I was receiving consoling pats on the back as if say my palee kpai! Dem say when house fall, goat go climb the roof. Na the courage say at least Warri boy try to try I take waka pass school gate that day. I nor gree show face for photo stands through out that semester.

It's been 18 years now but each time I remember this event, I just laugh it off as my most embarrassing moment on campus.

Miracle4Sure:

its good

Here for the comments

Casalinda:
The thought of it is making me laugh out loud.....

Here is it was walking back from lecture all by myself to be honest I was really stressed and hungry I had set out early that day as I had 6am class, you know how difficult those days as a 200level law student. Was walking back through my department I had this feeling that I was alone and no one was coming at my back so decided to fart hehehehe it was loud that when I turned to look if it was only me, behold this three guys were behind me... heaven came down on me that day hehehehe

Did I mention they were cute ooh lord i was so ashamed of my self and destiny

I understand the feeling dear but am still laughing so hard

Emmytrill:
I was late for a very important meeting at the school chapel, na so I start dey run like who buffalo dey pursue, I no know when I step on some wicked ants didn't take notice as some dey take position for my trouser, crawling up to my na so I reach the meeting, take seat for front as an Exco, I felt the first bite, I lock up, because I feel say my brain never settle. The next thing I know, na jump I jump from my chair, shout like who one nut loose from head. I almost naked for people front. They laugh me that day no be small.

Chai that's crazy o, I'm sure dem be female ants

I dey give my sef brain joor

Lemme not talk

It was a cold Monday morning in my 1st year.
I was sitted inside the engineering lecture theatre hooked to my ear piece, blasting music, completely oblivious to my surrounding.
Just then someone removed the chords from my ears , I looked up angrily ... (I hate being interrupted mid-jam) ...but alas it was a lecturer,...
He said: "didn't you hear when I ordered everyone not taking this class to leave the hall".
I was like: "obviously not, I saw people leaving the hall, but I'm a sucker for jazz, didn't care to check what was going on"..
He said : "alright then,go and stand in front of the class, you're gonna be joining us for today's lecture".
I was like: "can't I just leave the hall now"??
He was like: "front of the class now, you're gonna learn programming today".
So I walked up to the front the class, my head raised high in the air... I could hear his students laughing all around me...it was a little embarrassing.
I just stood in front of the class as he taught,
And then he wrote on the entire white board, and one of his students threw a rag at me ....
And was like: "make yourself useful and wipe the board"........every one laughed..
I looked at him and smirked sinisterly...
I was embarrassed and quite nervous but I kept a high head and didn't crack......

.
.
.
.
.
(Of course I didn't wipe the board)

Definitely has to be during a pool party. Got out the pool and was sitting beside the pool, didn't know my preeq cap was outside already, thanks to those Tommy Hilfiger boxers wey get buttons that year. I notice say breeze just dey blow that area but I didn't pay much attention afterall, I just got outta the pool. Like 1mins plus, one babe wey I no even know signaled to my crotch area, as I see my cap outside, I fly enter pool ASAP, I even injured my knees.
I can never ever ever ever forget! Especially the look on the girl face n her friends. Preeq wey never charge, e come be like say tiger ba3. DAMN!!

I don't know

It was the day tuition fee was increased and I got angry and decided to challenge the school authority....the whole student backed me up but I never knew it was fake support. All of them graduated and my own result was seized for speaking out against what I perceived as injustice. ...That result was seized for good one year and none of the students called to ask how I am doing ....one day I met one of the students and he was laughing at my condition ....he said , old boy...you go done dey work for chevron by now.....I was embarrass by that statement cos I expect those with result to 've gotten a job not me without result. My joy came the very day I was called to come pick up my result....my HOD sat ,me down and told me a story I cannot forget in a hurry....if you want the story mention me and I will give u the story

Lamanii22:



Hahahahaha... What a funny moment... That part when you said "you posed like a vulture beaten by rain" that really got me... In fact I can't stop laughing...

hope say you don finally stop to laugh? If not!

[/quote]my HOD sat ,me down and told me a story I cannot forget in a hurry....if you want the story mention me and I will give u the story[/quote]

Cc greggng

I have non.

Was coming back from lectures when I saw a mad woman who lived in a pile of rubbish about half a kilometer away from the school fence. Out of compassion, I bought egg roll and swan water for her because she looked so hungry. She hurriedly ate everything with so much excitement and before I knew what was going on she started following me everywhere...for about half an hour. Didn't know how to tell her to stop following me. Omo, see as people dey laugh me and my juvenile friends started calling her my wife. Lol. It took the intervention of security and some area boys to pursue her away. Had to stop plying that route for a while.

greggng:
It was the day tuition fee was increased and I got angry and decided to challenge the school authority....the whole student backed me up but I never knew it was fake support. All of them graduated and my own result was seized for speaking out against what I perceived as injustice. ...That result was seized for good one year and none of the students called to ask how I am doing ....one day I met one of the students and he was laughing at my condition ....he said , old boy...you go done dey work for chevron by now.....I was embarrass by that statement cos I expect those with result to 've gotten a job not me without result. My joy came the very day I was called to come pick up my result....my HOD sat ,me down and told me a story I cannot forget in a hurry....if you want the story mention me and I will give u the story

Drop the story

I just wake up and I wear only one small yeye boxers, meanwhile my third leg was still at half mast so no one noticed. Na so one clean seductive chick from my school fellowship just enter room to do follow-up on me, this third leg begin to rise steadily, uncontrollably and stubbornly vibrate. As the chick was about to go, she look down and see the thing and look up saying see you in fellowship on Sunday.