frozen70:


Those in the sixties are just not really satisfied for selfish reasons though there was low divorce then but now the state of economy and the state of mind of this generation is like make gas and lighter playing

Anything can trigger the lighter and gas to burn beyond irreconcilable matters

LewsTherin:


No offense intended but I don't understand you. The couple are in their 60s, they are influential, have great sex and "see their other half as one that completes them" and they still divorced? Expand more on the story please.

Fhemmmy:


Read the story all over again and let's discuss it

Lonelypacifist6:
Lots of factors can aid divorce, Human nature is Unpredictable and seeks change, You can actually get tired of people just like you get tired of an environment a car a phone or the likes.

Fhemmmy:


Yes, i totally agree sir/ma BUT i am only mentioning the area that we have NEVER focused on but always come to us as a shock

Lonelypacifist6:
Sir, Totally agree, spouses should be friends even after marriage it goes s long way.

Fhemmmy:


Refer to my last post where i analyzed it

LewsTherin:
Ok. I thought it was an actual story. A real experience.

Fhemmmy:


No it wasn't was just a scenario

LewsTherin:


Well, that is what I am asking for. I want to understand what happened.

Fhemmmy:


Oh my apologies Sir/ma . . .But what i am saying is that there are so many divorce at the later years of marriages because of the reasons i mentioned

LewsTherin:


So you are giving a hypothetical situation and do not actually have a case in point.

Fhemmmy:


I can tell you of many couples that grew apart . . . . BUT since you are NOT seeing it, i rest my case sir/ma

LewsTherin:

Of course I am not seeing it. You aren't giving it! I need a case study to fit in with what you just said. Otherwise, it is only your opinion.

Breaststroke:



Hey sorry I couldn't respond sooner. The day you posted this I was banned for the stuff you saw me mention on Tpia's thread

I wanted to say two things, first thank you for sharing your story you didn't have to but you did and I learnt something so kudos. Secondly, please can you avoid the alcohol? You dropped a destructive habit then picked it up again, don't you think you deserve better for yourself?

The first funeral I ever attended at age 17, was of a school mate who died from liver cirrhosis (A liver disease caused by chronic alcoholism), in retrospect I don't know what drove him to excessive drinking, he wasn't a married man with financial issues or an inability to pay school fees, feed or clothe a family so I truly don't know what drove him to it.

One of my relatives was diagnosed with HIV and ended up dead sooner rather than later. Guess what? It wasn't the HIV or Aids that got him it was chronic/excessive drinking of alcohol. The doctor said his internal organs were all messed up, I think fried up and shrunken like scrambled eggs was the phrase he used. Relative started drinking that way after the diagnosis and was gone within a short period of being diagnosed.

Alcohol does more harm than good. If it doesn't kill you first (I don't mean you in particular) it leaves you with an unattractive beer gut/belly. I think you deserve better and can do better for yourself, especially as we move into 2010. Think about it!

crackhaus:
Only very few people in this present generation actually know how to love.

This is what I believe to be the underlying cause.

Breaststroke:


You are back Lol

Breaststroke:


Your posts/comments crack me up so good, it was a pleasure to actually see you here tonight.

Breaststroke:


You see what the current bottle you are on, is already doing to you? I was the 17 year old attending my first funeral of someone who died from alcoholism. The deceased wasn't the 17 year old

Lonelypacifist6:
My ex-wife was all the best Until 2017 When I was financially unstable, I saw her true colours. Thanks to my brothers I've bounced back stronger, the story is long and I'm too tired to type.

ps my mom has a French passport my brothers were born abroad I'm the only one born in Nigeria and she has a wealthy fam so I don't just know wtf got into her.

RisenPhoenix:
Misplaced priorities. The newer generation of women get all their ideas of marriage from Africa Magic, Zeeworld and Telemundo. They believe a good husband is one who takes them to breakfast in Dubai and lunch in Hawaii. Where everyone gets up by 12 pm, just in time to go to the shopping mall and eateries, and come back home to find a ready sparkling house. And when the children come, they are all nice smiley wonderfully polite children who never poop in their pants and always get straight As in school.

Virtually every woman enters marriage with such expectations. When the reality hits in, it is natural to feel resentment. Our elders married by arrangement. There were no foolhardy notions of romantic love and other such nonsense. There was duty and responsibility and mutual respect and it worked. Now, men cannot live up to the unrealistic expectations and therefore, are not respected by their wives. This leads to the man's detachment from the wife and she loses his affection. They both end up thinking they could have chosen better partners. Logical end result...divorce.

emmaodet:


You have said it all bro.
Too much expectations from the women because of the lifestyles they lived at school.
Imagine a lady going out with sugar daddies at school, receiving 20-50k per week with all the treatments of good foods, drinks, nice hotel, flight etc and you expect such person to settle down and not see marriage as burden or cage were the hubby may be giving her 50k per month for family feeding.
It's a crazy world approaching us bro

bukatyne:


I will modify to say they loved someone else and for a myraid of reasons, did not marry them.

So they are stuck with someone else for convenience and soon enough, the center no longer holds.

There w is a difference because someone who has never loved and just picked any partner with someone in love once, never resolved or got closure and marrying someone else.

They forever subconsciously pine for what only their lover can give.

bukatyne:


I will modify to say they loved someone else and for a myraid of reasons, did not marry them.

So they are stuck with someone else for convenience and soon enough, the center no longer holds.

There w is a difference because someone who has never loved and just picked any partner with someone in love once, never resolved or got closure and marrying someone else.

They forever subconsciously pine for what only their lover can give.